A/n: I got this idea from something that happened yesterday. The main bnha character will be Mina, she supports you although she doesnt entirely understand, so without further a do here to it is, chapter 36. (Warning mentions of an anxiety attack.)
Email From: (Grandparents name)
Dangers of binding for Transgender teens
The effects and dangers of Transgender teens wearing a binder.
Tap here to read article:
Reply to: (Grandparents name)
Yes I know the risks, but I am sure to be careful at all times. I ordered a binder that fits me and I dont wear it for more than 8 hours -most of the time I wear it for just a couple. I dont even wear it every day. I am safe so there is nothing to worry about.
Email sent:
*Ring*
(Preffered Grandparent name *Gran, Abuelo, Nana*)
You: Hello?
GP/N: Hey, did you get my email?
You: Uhm, Yeah.
GP/N: So let me ask you something...
You:...
GP/N: Do you think you will like boys for the rest of your life?
You: I mean, I guess it could change but I'm pretty sure I like guys.
GP/N: Okay, it's just, that compressor thing you wear. I You dont like your boobs right?
You: No, I don't.
GP/N: And in the future, do you want to get them reduced or completely chopped off?
You: Completely chopped off?
GP/N: Well thing is, what if you find a really nice guy in the future and he is a boobs type guy.
You: What? Well, if he doesn't like me without boobs then I guess a relationship with him would be out of the question.
GP/N: Well yeah, but you aren't going to find a boyfriend if you get them completely chopped off. Like you said your sexuality could change and you could start liking girls so there is a possibility that in the future you might not even want that surgery.
You: I guess, but-
GP/N: Well, I just dont want you to make a desicion by binding now based on impulse. You need to love yourself. Bid boobs, big ass, no boobs, no ass, I'll still love you. I live bu being happy with myself and you shouldn't be hiding your boobs because they make you comfortable. I've taken psychology and I know more than you, trust me. You need to learn to be happy with yourself the way you are and not change anything. You are a beautiful girl, you're smart talented and funny. You should be happy with yourself.
You:...yeah...
GP/N: I have to get back to work, I'll talk to you later. Bye, love you!
You:..Love you t-too.
Ending the call you gaze down at your phone in disbelief. Your grandparent had actually told you that you wouldnt get a boyfriend if you didn't have boobs that you should get them reduced in size. It was you who would make that choice in the end, so why were they trying to interfere?
Your toes curled and your breathing quickened as you began to cry. Softly at first, then as time passed it only came harder. Tears were streaming down your face as your legs and arms shook from the racing thoughts in your head. They didnt know how much pain they were putting you in. By telling you, you were a beautiful girl? That you would never get a boyfriend if you get the bust in your chest removed?
Sure, you had to admit, for a girl you weren't bad looking, kind of pretty. But you didnt want to be a beautiful girl, you wanted to be a handsome boy. You didnt even have to be handsome, all you wanted was for your appearance to match who you were on the inside. Not just for yourself, but for others too. So other knew that you are a boy and wouldnt go off simple stereotypes of the feminine features you had.
A text was sent to your phone and your hand shook as you brought the shini kn g screen to your face and read the message.
Image:
This is what it would look like if you got your chest removed. It doesnt look pretty.
You gazed down at the image as you saw various flat chested people who had scars from top surgery. The chests on them had no nipples and you were confused. You had seen plenty of trans men after surgeries and they all explained how you would talk to your surgeon and ask questions as well as talk to them about nipple placement. They would answer any and all questions thoroughly and tell you of the dangers.
They were trying to get you to stay cis, right? Maybe make the choice for you. You had given more than enough hints that you wanted to be a boy. You guys talked about wanting to change your name, hating your chest, wearing more masculine clothes and hell you even came out to them, to which they responded by telling you that you were going through a phase and you were to young to "decide".
As a result of that you shook more and huffed as tears rushed down your face and thoughts clouded your brain. There were no words to express how much you wanted to be dead in that moment. To be gone from this world that only brought you despair. On occasion it would bring small treasures, but other than that...
It hadn't been the first time you felt this way. You had the urges before, but you had to suppress them. It landed you into a dark place before and doing it again would only bring you back and make your guardian think you were mentally ill. They would keep their eye on you 24/7 and you wouldn't be able to study at UA anymore.
Moving your text conversation to Mina you tell her about your situation and add that you dont want to seem like you are seeking attraction or trying to shove the fact that your aren't cis down her throat.
She texted back a few minutes after with a long paragraph of her own.
Mina:
Hey, just because you are getting something off something off your chest doesn't mean you're shoving your problems down my throat. I told you I would listen and also try to understand, unlike others -like the bitch Mineta- who are oblivious to the damage their doing. Even if they *dont* mean it. To me it is honestly disrespectful for someone to try and alter how another person wants to express themselves, even if they are family and they are the ones you have to go to, they have to think about what they are doing to you. Family is sometimes just people you are related to, their not really family if they cant accept the fact that you are gay and want to be a man. If they really cant accept you under these conditions then THEY CAN GO BURN IN HELL. I may have not known you for long but I swear to fucking God I love you bro! You are one of my favorite people, like you are family. I wish I had half the courage you had, <3
Reading the text over and over you smiled as the tears returned. But this time, they were for a lighter reason.