Finding myself

By Just_for_a_change

692K 36.6K 15.7K

IIHighest rank no: 3II What are the repercussions of a rejection? 1. Getting numb 2. Failing to care about a... More

Legend
Prologue
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
A/N
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
YOU GUYS MAKE ME SO HAPPY!
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
IMPORTANT!!!
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
So sorry!(Yes this is another one of those dingy notes)
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Chapter 40
Chapter 41
Chapter 42
Chapter 43
Chapter 44
Chapter 45
Chapter 46
Chapter 47
Chapter 48
Chapter 49
Chapter 50
Chapter 51
Notice
Chapter 52
Chapter 53
Chapter 54
Please read
Happy new year
Chapter 55
Chapter 56
Chapter 57
Chapter 58
Chapter 59
Chapter 60
Chapter 61
Chapter 62
Chapter 63
Chapter 64
Chapter 65
Chapter 66
Chapter 67
IMPORTANT
Chapter 68
Chapter 69
Chapter 70
Chapter 71
Chapter 72
Chapter 73
Chapter 74
Chapter 75
Chapter 76
Chapter 77
Chapter 78
Chapter 79
Chapter 80
Please read
Chapter 82
Chapter 83
Chapter 84
Important
Chapter 85
Chapter 86
Chapter 87
Chapter 88
Chapter 89
Chapter 90
Chapter 91
Chapter 92
Chapter 93
Chapter 94
Chapter 95
Chapter 96
Chapter 97
Chapter 98
Chapter 99
Chapter 100
Chapter 101
Chapter 102
Chapter 103
Chapter 104
Chapter 105
Chapter 106
Chapter 107
Chapter 108
Chapter 109
Chapter 110
Chapter 111
Chapter 112
Chapter 113
Chapter 114
Chapter 115
Chapter 116
Chapter 117
Chapter 118
Chapter 119
Chapter 120
Chapter 121
Chapter 122
Epilogue
Q&A

Chapter 81

3.1K 154 71
By Just_for_a_change

Stilts POV

I entered as soon as I heard the king finish his call.

He sighed as I poured him champagne. The drink wasn't calming him as usual.

Something about Zara must still be bothering him.

Zara was always bothering him. That troublesome child. I never saw what he saw in her to make her want to be his queen.

She was still immature and had a long way to go.

All in all, she was a mere... child.

Perhaps without her looks and her affinity with machines, she would be as suitable for the role of a vampire queen as any maidservant.

No... she would be even less suitable.

She was a werewolf after all.

One of the wretched species that stole my wife away from me.

"Stilts I know you disapprove of her but seriously if you frown any harder the lines may forever mar your face," Sam said in a jovial tone.

I knew him enough to pick out the differences between when he was actually joyful and when he was using it to cover his stress. This was definitely the latter.

"The spy gave you some disturbing news again, your highness?" I asked as I placed the champagne glass in front of him.

The golden drink caught the warm light in the room, glimmering graciously.

Sam leaned back in his chair.

"The spy always delivers disturbing news." Sam sighed again. My fists unconsciously clenched.

Even when we were alone he wouldn't speak the name of the spy. That is just how cautious he was. That and because the certain someone held some value to him. He didn't want to risk it if someone was eavesdropping. Especially since we were at the mansion so close to werewolf territory.

So he could protect Zara if things took a turn for the worst.

It didn't make sense how someone like him would ever want someone like that child. At first, his plan was to dispose of her as soon as he was done with her. But I saw his emotions change. The way he looked at her change.

And one day I suddenly knew. As intimidating and savage a beast he was, he could never harm a hair on her head.

The yearning I once had for Maria, I saw it in his eyes when he looked at her. He never expressed his desperation to her clearly since the child was always feared him.

I suppose he is scared of that desperation himself. Regardless Zara remained clueless. One of the many reasons I objected to their union so much.

What made it difficult was how loved she was by the king's brothers. They supported the king's decision. They never saw the disaster I saw.

She could never understand Sam. She would hold him back, his greatness, his vast potential.

I had no doubt she was his Achilles heel. She will be the death of him.

"Has she fallen for the boy yet?" I asked nonchalantly.

His head whipped towards me, his piercing eyes wedging into my soul.

"She is the future vampire queen and you shall regard her with the respect she deserves." He said coldly.

I clenched my fist under the weight of his gaze.

"Besides any insult to her would be an insult to me. Her failures will be mine for not teaching her properly. Especially if something like that happens so soon. So be careful of your words, Stilts." He warned.

"My apologies, your highness," I said bowing down with a hand over my heart. Baring my loyalty towards him.

"If I knew you would use your position as my second in command to forever address me so formally, I would have never bestowed it to you," Sam said tiredly twirling his drink in his glass.

"Your brothers will be here soon your highness," I said as his attention shifted towards paperwork.

"Ah, everything went well with the shipment then?" He asked cocking a brow.

"Very well, sending all three for them was under good consideration. It is a very large and expensive shipment after all. And we needed all of their connections for it to have worked so smoothly."

"I am glad to hear it." He said as he stood up and went to look over the window.

The forests beyond looked misty. The emerald green trees shrouded by an air of mystery.

Until a few months ago, he could gaze upon her every time he peered from that window.

The grunts of her training while an annoyance to me, were surely different for Sam.

He heard her improving, each wound she gathered was a testament to that. And while he never showed the concern to her, he always made me secretly order and deliver ointments to prevent scarring.

"Sage said the concoction works miraculously. Its effects on the test subjects are amazing." I said, trying to change the mood to a lighter note.

The successes of a long run experiment coming right.

"Hmm..." he mused.

"Well, that's good to hear. I will be sure to inform Zara of our plans shortly."

I frowned.

"But your highness we had already lied to her about postponing the date to see where her loyalties lie."

"I am well aware Stilts, but I have no intention of letting her stay there and be corrupted by those godforsaken creatures longer than she has to. Besides, we would need her help if it all has to work anyways." He explained calmly.

I could hear the slight fear in his voice, that gave him away despite his cool control.

He was afraid she would drift away from him.

The vampire king was so desperate that he was willing to place a plan as big as this. Something he has taken years to concoct into risk and jeopardy.

All for her.

My jaw clenched.

"And if she betrays you, your highness?" I asked.

"She won't" he declared. His tone finalizing.

The king always had plans and backup plans for everything.

And yet for that girl... he was willing to put all his trust in her and go in blind.

"Very well, I shall see to the shipment's arrival then your highness," I said bowing before turning to leave the room.

Perhaps it was alright for him to not worry. Because as long as I am around no one and nothing will get in his way.

Not even his precious Zara.

Zara POV

I pushed blaze out of the way and followed after the kid as he raced out, recklessly abandoning his bags.

"Hey wait," I called out after him.

Damn, when did he become so fast at running?

Without my wolf, I wouldn't be able to keep up.

He ran out of the mansion and into the vast grasslands behind leading to the forest.

Today was particularly misty, so losing sight go him was a possibility. And if it rained, even scenting him out will not be an easy task.

Blaze has thankfully left us alone, understanding we needed space. I was a bit surprised he didn't follow us secretly.

He didn't look happy about it though.

"Zarine wait," I said, finally catching up to the kid, tackling him to the ground.

I held both his arms to the grass as he peered up at me.

"Let me go. Let me GO!" He said wreathing beneath me.

"Only if you calm down and listen to me," I said sternly.

"Why bother? Aren't you gonna kill me anyway?" He asked, his face starting to turn red with tears.

Ah, so he heard.

I lifted him up into my arms as sobs started to shake through him. He was so light. No wonder he was so fast.

"I will never harm a hair on your head Zarine and I will kill anyone who tries to," I said firmly as I held him tightly to me.

He buried his face on my neck. His soft sniffles were the only thing letting me know that he was able to breathe through my hug.

Slowly, but surely he started to calm down. His heart stopped racing and the sobs and hiccups were receding.

For werewolves touch and scent were important. We needed it to survive. Not just between mates but as a community from each other.

Right now I could feel Zarine calming down. He was taking longer breaths, partly to stop the sobbing and partly because my scent calmed him.

I feel like a mother rocking her child.

Whatever Zarine was to me, the bond was just as sacred for me.

We are a family.

"You should know me enough by now to not get such crazy ideas." I chided, trying to listen to the mood.

"Who was that man?" He asked, his teary eyes looking up.

I winced at the question.

"He is... a friend." I said.

"A friend who can order you to kill us?"

I didn't answer.

"Listen, kid, it's better if you don't know. I can't drag you into my messes. Whatever you heard, you need to promise me to keep it a secret."

He looked to be thinking for a few seconds.

"Are you planning to kill the alpha king?" He asked. That must be where he started listening in to the conversation.

"Maybe," I said seriously.

My reply didn't seem to shock him.

"Okay." He said meekly.

"Okay what?" I asked.

"Okay, I will keep your secret." He said.

I couldn't help my smile.

"Good." He seemed to understand.

I wonder what happened in his past for all this to not sound horrific to him.

"It is time you tell me your past," I told him as I settled next to him on the ground.

"What is there to talk about?" He said while slowly picking at the grass.

"Hmm let's start with why your pack hates you so much."

I remembered the 'I hate you Zarine,' slogans in the alleyways where we first met.

He was quiet for a while. The wind whooshed by softly and the mists churned but didn't clear.

"Because I killed their beta." He said quietly.

"When the ancient packs rose up in a war against the alpha king, there were a lot of losses and casualties. Losses we hadn't had to face for centuries. One of them was my adoptive family, Alpha Zonn's beta. He died trying to protect me against a home invasion. My whole former family passed away that night, including my step-siblings." He paused for a while.

"The way the pack saw it, I was the only one who survived. A child with no background whatsoever. And it was the beta of an ancient pack that died protecting me. He was known for being kind."

So basically, the nobility of the beta screwed up the kid's life. That and the drama between Blaze and I. I could only imagine the damage it had inflicted on several families.

Partly I am responsible for him and all the other losses from both sides.

If only Blaze's father, Alpha Reynolds hadn't been as harsh.

No, Zara, don't go down that path.

Now it made sense why Zarine hated me when we first met. He must have thought back upon the incidents and saw me as the culprit for his sufferings.

"So you got adopted by East wing? Curt took you in, I mean Beta Bronn?" I asked.

"Yes, alpha Curt was generous. And since everyone at Black mountain already hated me for their Beta's death, including Alpha Zonn, they thought it best for me to be transferred. Didn't help much though, rumors started spreading quickly. Especially when the King's father reduced us all to slums. And people want to place the blame on someone during trying times. I was a social pariah at the best of times, seen as a criminal outcast at the worst." Zarine admitted.

No child should have to go through that amount of pain. Perhaps if the packs weren't at least forced together as they were in the slums, it wouldn't have been as bad.

No wonder Raven hinted for me to be prepared. This is a lot to take in.

"Zara, are you going to listen to that man?" He asked suddenly.

"I don't know Zarine." I sighed.

The winds picked up but it didn't affect us much. Zarine had stolen one of my hoodies again.

"Where were you planning on going anyways? And how the hell did you pack so fast?" I asked him suspiciously.

He blushed furiously.

"I just tossed a few books in the bag so it would look heavy. I didn't have anywhere to go. My whole bargain rested on the fact that you would follow me." He said, his cheeks, neck, and ears turning a bright red.

"And what if I didn't follow you? Or worse, what if I decided to kill you for knowing too much?" I asked.

"They wouldn't even suspect me you know. Considering how I was taking care of you for the past few weeks."

Ok, maybe that was laying it on a bit too thick. Even if I was protective of the kid, they would be fools to not suspect me, thanks to my aggression and violent tendencies.

My point is, the kid trusted me way too much. He acted without thinking at all.

"I dunno, I guess I will have to ask you for one last simple pleasure. Take a bite out of Hershey's and say goodbye to this world." He shrugged.

I shook my head, sometimes he didn't speak like a kid at all.

I tackled him to the ground tickling his sides.

We laughed out at his corny answer.

The wind once again picked up as we laid back down on the grass, a peaceful silence settling between us.

Hey, Lovelies!

Long time no see! I hope you are all doing well.

This chapter was quite informative and I wanted to stop giving you fillers. Plus you got to meet Stilts, a character briefly mentioned previously. He is Sam's loyal second in command for those who don't remember.

I hope to give you more of such chapters and the story to progress smoothly. Also, the ships would be announced real soon as I have promised you all.

If some of you noticed, I have also slightly changed my writing style. I will continue in this style. I started this book a few years ago and I have grown since then. But I wanted to stick to the old style for consistency's sake. I have seen many artists grow and develop and if they get that freedom, we writers should too right?

Corona has been trying times for all of us, and while I am not completely satisfied with how much I got to work on the story, I have a better idea of its direction at least.

I hope to update once every week. On Mondays or Tuesdays. But they will be good chapters.

The next chapter will be in Blaze's POV.

So guys, stay tuned!

Until Monday ;)

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