please comment throughout and make me feel validated lmao
remember when i used to upload every thursday and sunday? yeah, that'll never happen again aha but i'm so sorry it's been two weeks! have an early update!
💃 later on
***
"Five place grid penalty? Are you having a fucking laugh?" Max asked, a look of disbelief on his face. With his eyebrows furrowed and top lip curled, he stood up from the bed. I had just returned to the hotel room from a longer-than-average debrief where a key topic of conversation was the first lap incident and it's consequences. The meeting with the stewards just made me more angry. They thought, rather stupidly in my opinion, that my contact with Seb's Ferrari caused the initial puncture in Seb, which in result caused him to go slow and make contact with Charles. The only potential bit of good news was that Charles would also have a penalty for the next race for a dangerous overtake. We both received the five-place grid penalty.
With a huff, I sulked past him and sat down on the edge of the bed. "I wish I was joking. It's so stupid!" Anger was an understatement of how I was feeling, but I couldn't find the words to be able to express it without feeling the urge to cry. The tears that threatened to fall weren't sad ones. I had already been a little vulnerable in front of Kudzai immediately after the meeting so didn't fancy going through it again.
Max crouched down in front of me and took my hands in his. His calloused palms squeezed gently and rubbed over the back of mine in reassurance. "Even if you weren't my girlfriend, I'd think that you didn't deserve the penalty. And I'm not just saying this because I'm now leading the championship, either. I'm really sorry, schatje." He watched me carefully and tilted his head to the side. "You look like you want to cry."
I swallowed hard. His words made my eyes water and I clenched my jaw to try and stop it. "I don't." My voice cracked and the frown on my face deepened. "I really hate crying."
"C'mere." He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around my waist. Because of how he was crouched, I rested my head on his and placed my arms over his shoulders. My heart was beating fast and I knew Max could hear it and most likely feel it. The moment I closed my eyes, a tear slipped out and I hated myself for it. I felt like I had cried too much in my life already and over much worse things, too, for me to be acting like this over a shitty race weekend and penalty.
"Why does Baku hate me so much?" I let out a defeated sigh and squeezed Max a little tighter.
"At least you're okay - that's the important thing. I don't know what I'd do if you got hurt." Max's voice was low as he spoke and at a reduced volume to normal. "I was ready to jump out of my car if you needed me to."
"I just couldn't get my belt undone, that's all," I mumbled in reply. "I feel bad for Seb, though, because he's got a sprain on his ankle."
"He should still be able to race, no?"
"Yeah, but still. He's got three kids at home and I can imagine that gets more difficult when you have an injury."
Max hummed in agreement before we settled in a comfortable silence. I was enjoying the feeling of his arms wrapped around me, not wanting to pull away from the warmth. This weekend was something I wanted to forget, but a part of me knew that it would plague me for the rest of my career. It felt like a higher power didn't want me to finish a race here.
I don't know how long we just stayed there in an embrace before Max finally spoke up. His voice was so soft I barley didn't hear him. "I'm sorry."
"Sorry?" I asked in confusion, reluctantly sitting back in order to look at Max's face. His eyes looked sad and his bottom lip was slightly out.
"Yeah," he looked down at my knees, "I'm sorry I took the championship lead from you."
I furrowed my brow. "You don't need to be sorry about that."
"If you didn't have the crash, you'd still be leading it. I feel bad."
"You really shouldn't." Leaning down, I pressed a kiss to Max's forehead before resting my own against his. "I had the crash; you didn't. It's fair."
"Aren't you annoyed?" He asked. His fingers traced circles on my thighs.
"I'm annoyed, but not at you. If anyone was going to take the championship lead from me, I'm just glad it's you and no one else. As your girlfriend, it's my duty to be proud of you over everything, no matter how I'm feeling." I cupped his face with my hands so he looked up into my eyes. My current feelings were a huge contrast to what I had expected to happen last season. The whole reason I didn't tell Max about me being 'A' was because of how close we were battling, and I feared the competition would get the better of us. Although I wish I was still leading the championship, I had zero bitter emotions towards Max. He was an exceptional driver.
Max exhaled softly. "I love you."
The corners of my mouth twitched upwards and I gently placed a kiss to his lips. "And I love you."
"You feeling any better?" He asked, keeping close to my body by leaning forward.
"I'm still very angry," I admitted. "That five-second penalty... ugh!"
"I can try and make you feel better," Max's voice was laced with innocence, however the tracing of his fingers riding higher up my thighs. My breath got caught in my throat before shakily being released. The thumping in my chest was now from his touch and my mind went foggy. I couldn't form a coherent thought as Max pressed his lips to mine. He gently pushed me down so that my back hit the soft mattress and leaned over me.
I was reacting on instinct when I deepened the kiss by wrapping my arms tighter around him. My fingers gently tugged on the end of his hair, causing him to moan in satisfaction against my lips. Together, we shuffled towards the headboard so that we could both lay comfortably on the bed with no risk of falling off. I melted underneath his touch, enjoying the feeling of his gentle fingertips over my clothes. Bolts of electricity shot through my body when he touched the bare skin underneath my Mercedes shirt. He seemed to favour tracing little hearts with one hand whilst the other roamed the rest of my torso, and I definitely couldn't complain about it.
There was no feeling of haste like there usually was whenever we were intimate. Max was taking his sweet time to touch every inch of his desire. I was enjoying his kisses so much that I couldn't help but sigh when he stopped for a moment, allowing our foreheads to rest against each other.
"I don't know if you remember, but the last time we were in Baku, you accidentally told me you loved me."
I nodded my head, a warm feeling growing in my chest knowing that he cared enough to remember. "Yeah, I do. Best mistake I've ever made."
Max chuckled. "I just remember being so happy because I knew I loved you for so long at that point, like long before Canada. You are the best thing to happen to me since I got my seat in F1, or maybe ever."
"You're so cute," I caressed his cheek with my thumb, "and I'm so lucky that I have you."
"I'm the lucky one. I mean, look at you! You're strong, you're smart, you're stunning..." I felt my cheeks heating up at his words, "I could stay here all night and list things I love about you, but it'll be much easier to show you how much I love you, instead."
💃
Max's head dipped into my neck and he began to press gentle kisses to my skin. I picked up on his body language, anticipating where he was going with his affection. My hands reached down to the hem of his t-shirt and I began to tug it off. He assisted with the final part in removing it from his shirt, before I helped him with mine, leaving us both shirtless. Immediately, his warmth radiated against my skin and I couldn't help but arch my back off the bed to make our skin touch.
I closed my eyes in bliss as he tugged down my leggings with his spare hand. Every time his fingers grazed against my thighs, I hummed softly. I used my feet to help pull the fabric off my legs completely as Max swiftly removed his shorts.
There was no rush for us to get completely naked. I, for one, was simply enjoying the kisses he pressed against my neck, even more so when they were placed lower and lower. My hands tangled themselves in his hair, guiding him down as the burning feeling grew in my abdomen. I let out a small whine when he stopped, and looked down to see a cheeky grin on his face. He came back up and pressed a single kiss to my lips. "There's no rush, schatje."
His focus shifted to my upper body. With one hand still rested on my waist, the other reached behind me to undo the clasp of my sports bra. He slipped the straps down my arms, exposing my chest to him. My natural instinct was to shield myself even though he had seen my body many times before. I didn't look like the girls in the magazines despite being toned and my upper body was my main insecurity.
Max gently took my arms and pinned them above my head. As he knelt between my legs, he looked at my body with so much love, causing me to smile shyly up at him. "Zo mooi." My cheeks heated up at his words.
I wrapped my legs around his hips for comfort and friction. He traced his hands down my arms before the calloused pads of his hands grazed over my breasts. I didn't move my hands, enjoying the feeling of his touch. The nerves were tingling with pleasure and I closed my eyes to focus better on the feeling. My breasts were a little sore, but that was a side-effect if being on the pill I sometimes had to deal with. It didn't take from the pleasure, though. Soft moans slipped through my slightly parted lips and I felt Max harden in his boxers against the back of my upper thigh.
Eventually, Max's hands followed the curve of my waist down towards my underwear. He didn't pause as his fingers hooked the band and started to pull them down my legs. In order to get them off, he moved down the bed, allowing for my long legs to stretch out straight.
The cold air hit my sensitive core and I felt more eager than ever. To my relief, Max had discarded his boxers before reposition himself over me and reconnecting our lips. My hands smoothed over his muscular back, gripping onto his shoulders to pull my body upwards against his.
"Please," I begged through an exhale, my body craving contact with his. My voice was so soft that I didn't think he had heard me until he slowly pushed his hips against mine. I gasped softly as he slowly entered, my eyes rolling back at the feeling of him filling me up. A few low grunts escaped Max's lips as my walls clenched and adjusted for his size. His pubic bone brushed against my sensitive nerve bundle as he went all in.
My neck craned to allow Max more access to pepper soft kisses on my skin as he slowly started to rock his hips. With every slow thrust, he managed to satisfy a spot of pleasure inside of me. It was a nice change of pace, and a much more sweet side to Max. Once he realised I was getting more comfortable, he started to speed up. His grip moved to my hair, gently tugging on it to amplify the pleasure.
The soft thumping of the headboard hitting the wall echoed throughout the room with our soft moans. My name escaped through his lips between profanities. When I opened my eyes, I noticed how angelic he looked with his eyes fluttering closed with every thrust. My nails dug into his strong shoulders, almost certainly leaving a red mark or indentations. Pleasure was pulsing through my body like a drug; I was addicted. Sparks erupted between us at the point of contact and I knew Max was feeling the same euphoric feeling I was.
His arm rested above my head to support his body weight whilst his other travelled down my stomach. A high-pitched whimper erupted from the back of my throat when he started to rub my clit in addition to his thrusts, which were now at a mind-blowing pace. My eyes were rolled back in my head and my heart was thumping in my ears as my blood rushed through my body. "Oh, Max."
My mind was consumed with how good I was feeling down there. Our connection was unlike anything I had experienced with anyone before. I could feel the orgasm building with every thrust. My skin was glistening with sweat, as was Max's, as he continued to show me how much he loved me. With one deep, long grind against my hips, the bubble popped. My vision went white with pleasure and I moaned desperately, legs shaking around his hips as I released. The tightening of my walls around his length meant that he didn't last for much longer, and before long was finishing inside me with loud grunts.
💃 over
"I really love you," Max breathlessly told me as he pulled the thin sheet at the end of the bed over our naked bodies. He collapsed next to me however kept a hand resting on the dip of my waist.
I chuckled, smiling lazily in his direction. "You just showed me that." Reaching a hand up, I pushed his hair from his forehead where a subtle sheen reflected the dim light of the bedside lamps. "And I really love you, too."
"You know, we've never had a proper date," Max pointed out, tracing small heart shapes on my skin again. "When we're back in the UK, would it be something you want to do? I'm sure we can find somewhere that people won't recognise us."
"You asking me out, Verstappen?" I bit my lip to suppress a grin. Butterflies were erupting in my stomach at how cute Max was acting. He had a shy smile on his face as he looked at me with hope.
Leaning down, Max pressed a kiss to the top of my nose. "You bet."
"Well, I'll be honoured to go on a date with you," I replied. "You could always spend a week in Switzerland with me. A date there might be easier to have."
Max sighed in contentment. "That sounds really nice. I better start planning so it's all perfect for you."
"Anything's perfect, as long as I have you with me."
~***~
*not edited*
short and spicy
sorry for the little break! i am now officially done with uni until september (unless i have to redo any of the assignments). updates will resume as normal!
during my lil break, the first book in this series reached two hundred thousand reads. 200,000 reads. 200k reads... that's fucking insane. this book also reached 30k during my little break which is crazyyyyy. you'd have thought that because i'm a writer i'd be able to express the feelings i'm feeling about reaching this milestone but i can't. i am beyond happy and excited about this, even more so at the continued support you guys show for this book, too. i genuinely have so much love for you guys in my heart and i could never repay you for what you have given me. thank you from the deepest part of my heart. i am forever in your debt ❤️
if you haven't already checked it out, i have another book out called 'i love you'. it has a lot of lando norris which i know a lot of you love, as well as a sprinkling of my new bby nicky latifi for extra drama. it's a wip so please give it some love and support.
if you do not support the #blacklivesmatter movement or are not doing anything to support it, please swiftly remove this book from your library and unfollow me. i do not want to be associated with you. period.
i encourage you all to sign petitions and make donations if you can (there are YouTube videos where the ad revenue is going towards relevant charities. please watch these if you can't afford to make donations yourself, or even if you're making donations, too!) feel free to dm me for any links to information and petitions that will help. actively call out those who are racist or else you are being part of the problem.
all lives can't matter until #blacklivesmatter
qotc: are you going to any peaceful protests?
aotc: yes, i will be attending the one in my city. i encourage that you, too, take part in these protests, but only if it is safe to do so. make sure you wear protective clothing bc we still are in the midst of a pandemic. keep it peaceful and come together to protect our black brothers and sisters. stand with them in solidarity and support to make this world a better place for everyone currently living on it.