"Where did you say Poe found your new body?" Aria asked as she pressed her hand into the wall to take some weight off of her left leg. She left her crutches behind thinking it would be a short trip into the base. But after the third set of stairs she started to regret her stubborn mind.
R-8 told her they were close.
Aria let out a sigh as she used the force to lift him up the last set of stairs. "I'm going to need a break once we reach the room. This trip took way more out of me than I expected." It was easy for Aria to tell all her secrets and worries to her droid. She knew she could always count on him.
She knew he wouldn't try to kill her brother.
The air had a weight to it and smelled strongly of dirt, all of which were a result of them being at the very back of the base- into the depth of the mountain side.
Each breath she took in felt wet, and the sticky humidity made sweat pour from her annoyingly fast.
R-8 wheeled ahead and extended a small, fraying port to connect to the door's panel. "We'll have to fix that before you short circuit." She told him. "Be careful until we do, yeah? I just got you back." R-8 beeped as he worked on opening the door.
While he was preoccupied, Aria leaned into the wall and rested her soaked forehead against it. She could feel her heartbeat just under her skin, it beat so heavily if she stared close enough she was sure she would be able to see her skin rise and fall.
Her break was short lived as R-8 opened the door a few seconds later. She took in a strong breath and pushed off the wall to walk into the room.
She limped into the dark space as she used the light on R-8's gray body to guide her way. Her right leg burned from carrying most of her weight, but each time she put her weight on her left leg it threatened to crumble underneath her.
"I have to sit." Aria flopped down on a wooden crate and let her head hang low. R-8 wheeled in front of her and gave a soft beep. "No, I don't need help." She told him. "I just need to rest." She used the butt of her palm to wipe a drip of sweat from her brow. "I just need to rest." She said again, more to herself than to R-8.
He didn't believe her, so he wheeled into her foot then popped out the compartment with the commlink.
Her insistence made Aria smile. "I like how you worry about me." Aria told him as she took the commlink from his drawer. "It's annoying, but I like it." She told him. R-8 gave a chirpy beep as he rolled away to find the changing station that started their voyage.
Aria cleared her throat and lifted herself up before she turned on her commlink. "Finn?" She called out to the only person she believed would have their connection open. "Finn, are you there?"
There was half a minute of silence before his reply came. "Yeah, I'm here, what's up?"
"I left my crutches in the Falcon. I thought it would be a short trip but um... can you bring me my crutches?" She squeezed her eye closed at how desperate she sounded. "If you can't- that's okay, I can make the walk back."
"No, no, of course I'll bring them. Um, where are you?"
Aria gave a dry chuckle as she forgot to mention the most important piece. "The place Poe found R-8's replacement body." She explained to him, hoping he would know where it was. "Third floor all the way at the back of the base, dingy room, barely lit. You can't miss it. Follow the sound of my heavy panting."
A chuckle came through the commlink at Aria's horrible attempt of a joke. "I'll be there soon."
"Okay... thank you."
Finn saved her the embarrassment of acknowledging her gratitude.
She stuffed the commlink into her pocket and tried to find R-8 among the darkness. "Find it buddy? You're real low on battery." Aria squinted into the dim surrounding to spot a blinking light or flash of gray. A beep sounded from behind her and she turned her torso to see R-8 coming from a dark corner. "You found it?" She asked. He gave another beep. "Good, can you drag it over here? I can carry it back when Finn gets here with the crutches."
R-8 gave a whistle as he tried to slowly pull the charging station over to Aria. It took him a while, and the tow strap he had hooked up seemed on its last leg. "That's another thing we have to repair." She told him as he pulled the charging station in front of her. She bent over and unclipped the hook so it could retract back into him. "It's going to take a bit for you to get back to your old self." She warned him. "But, if I'm out of commission for a while... I might as well fix you up. At least one of us will be back to full strength." She rubbed his dome until his body started to rock back and forth.
"I can help fix him, if you want." Aria looked to the door to see Poe with her crutches in his hand. He made record time, meaning he had to have sprinted to her.
"Of course he sent you." Aria gave a sorry sigh as she watched Poe step into the room.
"I was next to him when you called." He explained as he took another step. "I knew exactly where the room was. I offered."
"Course." Aria nodded as her irritation started to build. "You always find yourself in just the right spots. Lucky you-" Aria pushed herself up from the crate, but her left leg lost all its strength and she nearly toppled over. Poe reached out for her, but she smacked his hands away as she balanced on her right leg. "I got it." She chastised him.
"I'm just trying to help!" His own irritation began to seep through at her stubborn insistence. "You are so damn independent." He swore at her.
Aria gave a dark laugh as she ripped the crutches from his grasp. "That was something you use to like about me." She sneered as she positioned her crutches under her arms to alleviate the weight from her leg. "But now that it's not working in your favor you find it annoying?" She challenged him.
"No, I- God, Aria, can't we go one day without fighting?" He rubbed his hands over his face as he took a step away from her.
Aria watched his tense shoulders as he moved further into the dark room. "I don't know." She told him hotly. "Every time I look at you it just- it makes my heart hurt."
Poe turned at her words. He dropped his hands from his face and watched as her façade crumbled just enough for him to see the pain underneath. "Hurt, how?" He took a step closer to her. It was a small step, but he didn't want to press his luck.
"What?" Aria's voice was hollow as she watched him. "What do you mean-"
"Does it hurt because you miss me?" Poe's sincere eyes floated between hers. "Or does it hurt because every time you look at me you're filled with so much disgust it causes your blood to boil." His lips pulled back at the graphic image.
Aria blinked at his question, and while she contemplated it he took another step.
"I-"
He took another small step as her gaze focused on the wall over his shoulder.
"I think-"
One more step and he stood just in front of her.
Her eyes moved to catch his and he saw the clarity in them. "I could never be disgusted with you." She lost all of her fight as she found the stars in his eyes. "You don't fight fair." She told him in the same voice.
Poe gave a sad smile. "I want to make it as hard as I can for you to hate me." His voice dripped sweet with honey. "But the fact that you took so long to answer tells me I still have work to do." His smile fell as he took a step away from her. He had tried to hard to get close to her, and now that he had he was stepping away. "I still find myself incapable of not loving you."
Aria's confusion boiled over as she watched him leave. He had been hellbent on getting her to talk to him, and as soon as she does he leaves?
When it was just her and R-8, she looked down at her droid to get his reaction. "Well? What happened?"
R-8 shook his head the best he could on the old body.
"You're absolutely no help." She told him sourly.
He apologized before he started to roll out of the room.
Aria pulled the charging station onto her shoulder, then adjusted her crutches before she followed after the helpless, hopeless droid.
"I know exactly what you need." Connix pulled the seat closer to Aria before she handed off an entire bottle of wine.
Aria lifted the bottle so she could catch the label with the fire's flames. The green bottle reflected the flames easily, making the wine inside light up. "Red wine? I always took you as a sweet, white wine kind of girl." Aria admitted as she started to tear away the plastic from the top. She kicked her feet up on the brim of the fire and threw her plastic cap into the flames after it was free.
"How dare you!" Connix laughed as she handed another bottle to Rose before she grabbed her own. "I am offended that you think so lowly of me." She peeled her own plastic top off before she unscrewed the cap.
"Sorry," Aria laughed at her over reaction. "You know... I don't think I'm supposed to mix alcohol and pain meds..." Aria stared at the open mouth for a second before she lifted it to her lips and took a long sip. Connix and Rose looked at her with wide eyes, turned towards each other, than gave a loud cheer that pulled everyone else's attention.
The wine was so dry the second it touched her tongue she begged for water. On its way down it coated her throat with liquid fire and burned the entire path to her stomach. When Aria needed air, she lowered the bottle and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "That's disgusting, where'd you get this? The trash system?" She scrutinized as she looked over at Connix.
"It's free wine, don't judge it." Connix scolded her as she put her own bottle to her lips.
Aria watched her closely as her face screwed up from the dry wine. The exact second she pulled the bottle away, Aria laughed in her face. "What now?" She laughed as she took another sip of her own bottle.
Rose tried hers, gave a sour face, then took another sip.
"Where's everyone else?" Connix asked as they all leaned back in their chairs. Aria stared at the fire as she gave a measly shrug. Her answer didn't suffice, so Connix turned to Rose.
"Rey has an early perimeter run tomorrow morning, Finn is with Poe and Poe... is not here." Rose gave a side glance to Aria.
"It's okay, you can say his name." Aria said with distaste as she rose the bottle back to her mouth. As the dry wine coated her throat she closed her eyes. She set the bottle on her knee and let her head fall back against the chair. She looked up to the black sky and counted the stars. It was an impossible task, but at least it gave her brain something to do other than think about Poe.
"You look miserable." Connix told her as she folded her legs underneath her. Aria humphed as she went back to counting. "I'm not talking about the kind of miserable that comes with being injured and out of a job... I mean the kind of miserable where you miss someone so much you don't know how to function."
A lump formed in Aria's throat that wouldn't go away as she swallowed. So she tried to wash it down with more wine. When it was half its size she put the bottle down. "I'm tired of talking about how miserable I look." She told them both, not unkindly, but forcibly enough for them to get the message. "There has to be more shit going on in this universe than me and Poe's lack of a relationship."
There was a pause when no one said anything.
Rose and Connix looked at one another, urging the other to come up with something. As Connix pursed her lips, Rose decided the finally break the silence. "I kissed Finn."
Aria almost choked on her saliva as she sat up in her chair. "What?" A part of her wanted to gag at the idea of kissing Finn, but the other part was so damn happy that Rose took her shot.
"When?" Connix asked just as loudly.
Rose looked between the two girls. Everyone was so hellbent on talking about the Resistance all the time, so it was odd for her to talk about something as trivial as a kiss. "It was, um, after I crashed into him on Crait. I told him we were fighting for the people we love, then I kissed him... then I think I fainted..." Rose's eyes narrowed at the fuzzy details.
Aria blinked rapidly as she tried to process the new information. "Well... have you two talked about it since?" Aria asked as she rested her elbows on her bent knees. "Have you kissed him again?" Rose shook her head. "Why the hell not?" Aria threw her one hand up as the other held onto her bottle.
"He never brought it up again." Rose looked to the flames to avoid their curious glances. "I just don't think he feels that way about me." Rose told them. "I'm not like you, Aria. People like you and Rey and Finn and Poe.. you belong together. I'm just.. me." She gave a shrug.
"Bullshit!" Aria's brows rose up behind her forehead at Rose's lack of confidence.
"That's insane!" Connix added on. Aria nodded at Connix's addition.
"He's a rightful prick if he doesn't feel the same way about you." Aria told her. "Truthfully-" She leaned forward and dropped her voice to a whisper. "I'm not very fond of him. When I first met him I knocked him on his ass and every day since then I wish I could go back and do it again."
Connix slapped her hand over her face to stop the snort from coming out.
Aria nodded at Connix's reaction before she took another sip of her wine. The bottle was almost empty, and the alcohol mixed with the pain medication made Aria feel about ten feet high.
"I whole heartedly agree with Aria. Bro's a dick." Connix slurred her words as she finished off her bottle. Aria looked over at her friend at the crude language. Connix's cheeks were flushed and there was a glossy tint to her eyes.
"What about you?" Aria pointed her bottle at Connix. "Any hooks ups or relationships we don't know about?" She put the bottle to her lips and lifted it all the way up to drain the rest of the wine from the green bottle.
"I..." Connix was unsure of how much to share, but the wine loosened her tongue. "I had this... thing... with another officer."
That time it was Rose and Aria lifting their hands in the air to cheer.
"Sh!" Connix shushed them as she looked around to the other groups enjoying their night off. "People will hear you!"
"Oh, who cares!?" Aria set the empty bottle down by her feet. "The whole base knows about my shitty break up. I hear them whisper about it when I walk by. Those little shits-" Aria sneered as she glared at the campfire next to them.
"She doesn't mean it." Rose told them. "She's intoxicated."
"I may be intoxicated but I meant it." Aria countered Rose's makeshift apology. "So keep to your business." She warned them hotly.
Connix laughed again before she leaned over to smack Aria's arm.
Aria lifted herself back and turned to look at Connix. "What? I'm just being honest here." Aria shrugged and leaned back into her chair. "Okay, so tell me about this guy." Aria shimmied her shoulders to find a more comfortable position. When she relaxed, she looked to the flames and waited for Connix's story.
"Well, the guy was a girl." Connix said sheepishly.
Aria's eyes lifted over the flames to meet Rose's. Their single second glance said all it needed to: this was an important moment.
"Tell us about this girl." Aria rephrased as if she simply pronounced a name wrong.
Connix looked between Rose and Aria to gauge their reactions, but their lack of a reaction made her feel good.
"She has bright red hair... and green eyes."
"Oh you like gingers?" Aria snickered as she turned her head to look at Connix. She was slumped so far in her chair she had a double chin and her butt was practically off the seat. "Sorry, sorry, go on explaining." She rolled her hand through the air expectantly.
Connix took a breath as she thought about more details. "She has a ton of freckles... like more than I have ever seen on a single body."
Aria wiggled her brows seductively towards Rose so she wouldn't interrupt Connix's story.
"We got really close, hooked up, then she said it was a mistake and hasn't talked to me since." Connix's words sobered her, and the two girls were right behind her as they lifted themselves in their chairs to look at her.
"I'm sorry, Kaydel." Aria used her first name softly. "That's... that was a shitty thing for her to do."
Rose nodded excessively.
Connix looked into the fire so she didn't have to see the pity in their eyes. "It happens more than you think it would."
Her comment didn't make either of the girls feel better.
"Well..." Rose tried to think of something positive to say. "It seems like we all have a pretty shitty story about a person we cared about."
Aria gave a drunken laugh at the revelation. "Holy shit." She nodded as she thought about it. "You're right." The girls all shared a look before they burst into a fit of uncontrollable, drunk laughter.
Across the courtyard, with their own fire to keep their attention, were Poe and Finn. They could hear the girls' laughter easily through the open air.
Poe looked over just as Aria's head fell back. The moon washed over her so beautifully it reminded him of the night he proposed. He didn't mean to do it that night. He wanted to set up an elaborate proposal after he asked for Leia's blessing, but she looked so timeless under the starlight. He couldn't help himself.
"She's laughing... that's good, right?" Finn asked as he kept his gaze on Poe's still face. That same dent etched its way between his thick brows, deepening as it worked on becoming a permanent resident.
"Yeah." Poe breathed out. He missed her laugh, and the way her eyes squinted as her smile took up half her whole face. There was so much he missed about her but he couldn't do a damn thing about it.
"I think it'll be good for you to give her some space. It'll make her realize how much she misses you." Finn offered.
"Or will show her how she could be without me." Poe countered as he looked back at Finn. The fire gave his dark complexion an orange glow as the flames danced dangerously close. "You said it yourself, she's laughing... while we're broken up and I'm giving her space she's... laughing."
"She's drunk." Finn tried to explain it.
Poe shook his head as he ran his hands through his hair. "It's more than that."
"You're tired, Poe. You're over thinking this. Maybe you need some time away from her." Finn gave another, unpopular perspective. Poe froze as he lifted his gaze over the flame to look at Finn for further explanation. "All I'm saying is your life has been consumed with her. You wake up, eat, fly with her. You need to figure out how to live without her... in case she doesn't come back."
Poe's leg began to bounce as he took in Finn's advice. His head dropped forward as he linked his fingers behind his neck.
"I'm sorry," Finn apologized.
Poe shook his bent head. "No, no, you're right." With his hands still locked together he lifted his head to meet Finn's stare again. "I need to figure out a new normal... one that might not include her." The worlds were bitter in his mouth, as he swallowed them they scratched at the lining of his throat and filled his stomach with iron.
All the while, Aria kept laughing with her friends.
"I think I'm- I'm officially drunk." Aria raised her hand sheepishly.
"Me too." Rose nodded as she set her empty bottle of the ground so we wouldn't have to keep holding it. "I feel nice and warm inside."
"Are you sure that's not the fire?" Connix pointed to the flames that danced just beyond Rose's knees.
Rose gave a slant smile as she giggled. Soon, Connix and Aria joined in.
"I'm tired." Fatigue slapped Aria in the face as both the wine and pain meds dampened her giggly mood. The other two slowly stopped laughing. It was almost as if Aria's proclamation put a spell on them to tire them out. The girls all quieted as they watched the flames.
"I think it's the wine that's making me warm." Rose said again. "Definitely the wine."
"Tomorrow isn't going to be fun." Aria pouted as she thought ahead. "I get my stitches out, it's my first day back with my students after the..." Aria stopped herself from saying it. "Tomorrow isn't going to be fun." She said again.
"Sleepover?" Rose proposed.
Aria raised an intrigued brow as she looked over at the sleepy girl. "My Falcon is right- right there-" Aria grabbed the back of her chair to twist her upper body to point to the Falcon. "My bed could easily fit... squish three of us on it." She giggled as she changed her mind. "As long as you guys don't mind snuggling."
Connix gave an exhausted, drunk giggle. "A sleepover? I haven't had one of those since I was an infant."
"I've never had one with girls before." Aria admitted as she looked between Rose and Connix. "I've had sleepovers with boys before- loads of those- but sleeping wasn't actually on the agenda... if you catch my drift." She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.
"Yeah, I'm pretty sure all of base catches your drift." Rose told her as she stood up. "Come on, let's go before I fall asleep in this chair." Rose offered her hand to Aria. Aria let her hand fall sloppily in Rose's, then she tried to stand but her inebriated state made it harder for her to figure out what straight was. She kept wanting to lean off to the left.
"No, no, you gotta- Kaydel, help me-" Rose groaned as all of Aria's weight suddenly dropped on her.
Connix grabbed Aria's other arm and slipped it over her shoulder, then the three girls slowly made their way to the Falcon. "How's the leg?" Connix asked as she looked down at Aria's left leg.
"Good." To prove her point, Aria pulled her arms from the two girls and stepped forward on her own. Her left leg held itself together, but it was Aria's balance that made her stagger off to one side.
"Woah, woah, woah, run away pilot!" Rose laughed as she chased after Aria.
Connix laughed as she stumbled behind Rose to get Aria.
"No, no, I'm not a runaway!" Aria told them as she tried to stop her feet from moving on their own. "I'm a lost soul." She let out a dumb laugh at her horrible joke.
"Gotcha!" Rose grabbed Aria's hand and pulled her back before she tumbled into another group's fire. "Oh, I am so- uh oh-" Rose's flushed face blanched as she looked at who's bonfire they almost stumbled upon.
"What?" Connix appeared on Aria's side and grabbed her arm to sling around her shoulder. When she did, she noticed what Rose was staring at.
Aria's dumb laugh kept up until she felt the quiet, tense air around her. She blinked and looked from Rose, to Connix, to who was in front of them. "Oh-" Aria's lips formed a perfect circle as she saw Poe's face. "Um... this is awkward-" She laughed. "We were on our way to- um- to the-" Aria suddenly couldn't think of anything as she watched the flames dance in Poe's dark eyes. His skin had a warm, beautiful glow to it that made Aria want to nuzzle her face into his neck.
"To the Falcon." Connix finished for her. "We had a little bit to drink." Aria nodded at Connix's explanation.
"Little?" Finn asked as he looked across each of their flushed faces.
"Someone had their wine on top of pain medication." Rose said without thought, then internally slapped herself.
"What?" Poe stood up as he gave Aria an accusingly look.
"Do you think he heard you?" Aria whispered to Rose as she kept her eyes on Poe.
"Yeah, yeah, he heard." Poe stepped towards Aria. "Aria, you can't-" He stopped himself as he remembered what Finn told him. He couldn't always be there for Aria. Sometimes he had to back up. She had to miss him. But in order to do that, he had to let her miss him. "Make sure she doesn't vomit." He looked to Connix who seemed the least drunk of the three.
Connix nodded as she tightened her hold on Aria. "I will."
Poe nodded as he looked back at Aria who hadn't taken her eyes off of him. He had only seen her drunk three separate times, and each time he found himself falling utterly in love with her stupid, drunk gibberish. But this time.. this time he couldn't even enjoy it.
"Come on, let's go." Connix lightly tugged on Aria to get her to back away. As she did, Rose followed until the three girls were walking back to the Falcon.
"That went well." Aria thought out loud. "No fighting. That's a huge win. Rose, you should have fought Finn for not talking about the kiss." Aria's voice was loud, and with how close they were to the boys, Rose was sure they heard her.
"Sh!" She pinched Aria's inner arm to shut her up. "I don't think things to be more awkward between us."
"Sorry!" Aria sucked in a breath through her teeth.
The three girls decided silence was the best option for the rest of their walk. When they stumbled onto the Falcon, Aria took the lead to show them the way to her room.
"It's a bit messy, I'm still in the process of unpacking and my dad's shit is still everywhere so-" Aria opened the door and immediately tripped over a pair of jeans. "See?" She apologized with a shrug as she kicked them out of the way.
Rose and Connix looked on in wonderment at Aria's room. It was a perfect mess of her and her dad- two Resistance legends that somehow turn a room into a laundry tornado.
Aria didn't care about the mess or their gawking as she took her shoes off and fell face first into the middle of the bed. She didn't eve reach the pillows and her feet hung off the bottom, but she was too tired to move.
Connix and Rose were close behind. They took their time untying their shoes, then set them aside nicely before they crawled onto either side of Aria.
Rose laid on her back as she looked up at the side while Connix laid on her side facing Aria to make sure she wouldn't throw up.
"I miss him," Aria told them as she drifted to sleep. "I miss him so much I'm miserable." The bed muffled her voice, but they still somehow understood her.
"We know." Rose closed her eyes as she felt sleep weighing down on her. "It's okay."