The Beatles: You're Going To Lose That Girl
It's been almost a week after Harry and I had 'the talk' and I still hadn't heard from him, which worried me... He was giving me space, that was good on the one hand, but on the other hand I didn't really know if space was what we needed and what would help us rebuild the bond we had. I didn't know what I wanted him to do, and that's what was keeping me up at night. The week dragged by slowly, it's soundtrack being constant rain and showers. The team focused on scoring more clients and our event with Calum Scott was a success. I shared my frustration about that event lacking all challenging aspects and Rodney completely understood where I was coming from but assured me we'd get there soon enough. Nobody from our team was a beginner, besides Ben – the intern. We all had jobs in the industry before working for 'ROD Productions' and we were all used to having a bit of a challenge... having worked events like Bernie's rally or the Coldplay tour I found nothing interesting, inspiring or remotely creative in setting up a few armchairs and plugging the mixing station into the loudspeakers. Calum was a nice guy and his manager thanked me many times for teaching him how to produce future events similar to this one, himself. They didn't have a lot of money to spend on a production company and it was very pointless for me to charge them an amount that would cause them a headache when, in reality, they could do all of this on their own easily. It was Friday and I was heading out the door to meet with Niall, Lewis and Willie in Mahiki again, hoping this night wouldn't turn out a disaster, like last week's outing did.
"Hiya, love! How have you been?", the boys were sat at a different table this time and I plopped down next to them after ordering myself a pint.
"Good. Work was uneventful... but I unpacked the last of my boxes so I am officially moved in!", we all raised our glasses to that and I promised to throw a casual 'moving in get together' soon.
"No Harry tonight?", Willie asked sheepishly.
"I don't really know. But we talked it over and he promised to never make our previous relationship into a soap opera that it wasn't and isn't, ever again.", Niall snickered at my comment and Lewis seemed the most lost in this conversation between the four of us.
"I love that we're making this into a weekly thing, y'know... drinks with the crew, makes me feel normal.", we all looked at Niall after he mentioned himself and 'normal' in the same sentence.
"Honey, you couldn't be normal even if you tried, but it's sweet you think meeting up with friends on a Friday night makes you into a regular Joe.", all of them booed and oohed at what I said, but they all agreed with me in the end... even Niall.
*Harry's P.O.V.*
I was at Grimmie's for dinner, he forbade me from going out again after what happened last week even after I told him it was a one time thing.
"Man, we haven't talked the entire week, I don't know what to say to her.", I grabbed my bottle of beer while Nick watched over the steaks. He looked at me funny.
"What do you mean you've not talked to her since Saturday? You're gonna lose that girl mate, if you don't start listening to what she's saying."
"I don't know how! I spent two months blaming her for our break up and not even considering the possibility that I overreacted. How can I face her, now, after she told her side of the story?", I truly was at a loss of words when it came to my teacup, and at a loss of ideas on how to make things right.
"The only thing you can do is try and be her friend once again, like you said you would... remember?", Grimmie was right and I knew it, it was just too hard of a bullet to bite. My mum was also right, as usual, when she asked me if maybe Thea tried more than I gave her credit for. The idea of losing her terrified me so much that I froze and did nothing, instead of reaching out. Thank the universe for Niall, who kept me updated after their lunches and even sent me a sneaky pic he snapped of her tonight over drinks. He told me she seemed fine but she wouldn't tell him much about our Saturday morning chat. She protected the privacy of our relationship unknowingly, saving me from embarrassment in front of my friend.
"I'm not gonna feed you unless you promise you'll call her tomorrow.", he pulled the plate away from me just as I was about to dig into the steak, "Fine, I promise... now give me my food".
*Thea's P.O.V.*
I got home a little after two in the morning and tried finding the way to my room in the dark, but then I remembered I wouldn't wake anyone up if I just switched on the light. This one bedroom flat really felt like home... A comfortable reading chair by one of the windows, for all the times I want to pretend I'm being cultured with a book in my hands but end up scrolling through Twitter. A tiny mint green dining table with four mismatched chairs, which will surely turn into good companions for all the dinner parties I'll inevitably have soon but are also nice to look at even when empty. A fireplace above which stands a little flat screen television, for Gossip girl marathons and weird Woody Allen film nights. The space is small but homey and inviting, there's lots of light and bookshelves filled with memories from tour and life in the States. Josh would love it here. Harry would too... I couldn't understand why he still hadn't called me. That was the thing about Harry and me – I wanted to be with him, even after the fight and the horrible emotions his words made me feel, but I also wanted him to understand where he made mistakes. I'm not without blame in our fallout, by any means. I finally understood that this relationship would require as much talking and as much trust as was possible... without those components it would fall apart again. The first time we tried our hand at being together we simply set too many boundaries. I didn't even want to admit we were in a relationship because I was afraid of having my heart broken, I thought the kind of love I could give was not the kind of love he wanted to receive. As if being together, given all the circumstances, wasn't complicated enough we decided to make it harder for ourselves by assuming we had to a) always be on the same page about everything and b) know what the other one is thinking without talking about it. The first was more Harry's fault, but the latter was all on me. You'd be surprised what your brain is capable of deciphering when the power of three pints took over the command center.
A phone call woke me up the next morning... at noon to be precise, so I wasn't really sure that still counted as morning.
"Yeah?", I yawned into the phone and slowly pulled my feed out from under the duvet and onto the cold wooden floor.
"Did I wake you, teacup?"
"Maybe... but it's midday and I would have to get up eventually. What's up?", the kettle got louder and I was looking forward to the cup of coffee I was about to ingest.
"Do you maybe want to go to lunch today? Or dinner?", Harry asked and half of me was relieved that he finally made the first move so I wouldn't have to, but the other half of me didn't want to start rebuilding our friendship while Big Brother was watching... and he was always watching when you were in the presence of Harry Styles.
"I think it would be better if you come over to mine for a late lunch. Would that be okay?", I waited for him to answer while my lips eagerly moved toward to steaming mug filled with delicious coffee, "Yeah, that's probably a better idea. Be careful with that coffee, you'll burn your lips.".
"How did you know?", I set the mug down in front of me, "The excitement in your voice is unmistakable when you're about to take the first sip of coffee in the morning, teacup...".
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A/N: short but sweet :) I'd like it if you told me what you think about these internal monologues they have. I think it gives insight into what each of them is feeling and thinking, and I feel it's good to compare and look back at what they admitted to themselves and what they ended up telling each other. Dunno, tell me what you think :)
TPWK, always.
T.