Requested!
Impossible (Matt Engarde x Reader)
SMUT (But actual story too!)
A/N: This takes place before the Juan Corrida incident but after the Celeste Impax incident.
Your Pov:
I was a girl who used to be so insecure when it came to anything about me. That was, until, I met Matt. He was handsome and kind. I had heard about the Celeste Impax incident and how he was involved in it, but I didn't believe that he could be capable of such things. We met on one of the Nickel Samurai sets. I was an intern then. I would bring in coffee and the like to the actors and actresses.
After we met, my life took a turn for the better. He helped me feel more confident in myself. And in return, I loved him with everything I had to offer. Everything was perfect.
For a while.
Juan Corrida started to rise again, causing Matt to do everything in his power to keep him from being #1. That meant that Matt was away filming for long periods of time, leaving me to take care of our cat, Shoe, and the house. I didn't mind though. I loved him.
Finally, after months of being alone, Matt finally got a week off of work. I woke up that morning and turned to see Matt sleeping peacefully. I smiled and softly ran my thumb over his cheek. He stirred and opened his eyes, resting his hand over mine, "Good morning babe." I spoke, "Good morning. Remember, you have the whole week off to do whatever you want." He looked at me.
"I think I have a few ideas in mind."
Smut starts now!!! Skip if this makes you uncomfortable!!!
He rolled onto me, using his forearms to prop himself up. I looked up at him with a smile. He leaned down and captured my lips in a kiss. I kissed back, lightly nibbling on his lip. His tongue swiped over my lip quickly. I slightly opened my mouth and our tongues fought for dominance. My hands tangled themselves in his hair as he kissed me harder. He pulled away to kiss down my jawline and to my neck. I let my head loll to the side as he kissed and sucked on the skin.
I moaned a bit lewdly as he bit into the skin, leaving a hickey. His hands traced patterns in my skin until he reached the hem of my shirt. I nodded and he took it off of me, dropping it on the floor. I don't sleep with a bra, so my chest was on full display. He switched us around so we were sitting up and I was straddling his lap. He dipped his head down and started to tease my chest with his tongue.
He licked down the valley of my chest. I pulled him closer when I felt his tongue flick over my sensitive bud. He chuckled against my chest. Then, he started to move his tongue quicker, rapidly licking now. I moaned, knotting my hands in his hair. He paused his actions for a moment, but before I could catch my breath, he started to suck on my buds. He switched back and forth between licking and sucking. He turned us so that my back faced the pillows and let me fall back. I softly hit the pillows, panting quite a bit.
I could feel my core becoming very warm. I reached up and slid off Matt's shirt, leaving him in his boxers. I bucked towards his hand when I felt his fingers tracing me through my underwear. He looked at me, "Do you like that, babe?" I nodded and looked at him through lust filled eyes. He moved down towards my legs, spreading them a little. He took my panties off and I shivered. Suddenly, I tried to squeeze my thighs together as he started to lick me. I moaned a bit loudly, but we were in our own house anyways, so I didn't care.
His tongue thrusted into me, causing me to try and buck my hips towards his face, but he held me in place. My heart started to beat faster as I felt the knot in my stomach get tighter. I stuttered, "I-I'm gonna-!" I came, feeling the knot untie itself. I could feel myself becoming sensitive as Matt lapped up what he could, causing me to whimper. He sat up straight. I moved off the bed and made him sit on the foot of it while I sat in front of him. He looked at me, "Babe, what are you-" I cut him off, "Just relax. You'll enjoy it. I promise."
I removed his boxers, looking at his length. I stroked him a few times earning some groans from him. I moved closer, pressing his length between my cleavage. I locked eyes with him as I began to lick the head. He moaned, tangling a hand in my hair. I decided to amp things up. I started the suck the head as I moved my breasts up and down the rest of his length. His moans and groans increased in volume. Then, he spoke, "B-Babe I'm-" I felt the warm liquid shoot into my throat with a bit leaking out and staying on my breasts and face. I swallowed and stood up, quickly cleaning my face with a nearby tissue. Matt spoke up.
"Come here babe." I closed the distance between us. He picked me up, my legs wrapping around his face. He sat back on the bed and immediately slipped into me. I moaned in his ear. I moved my hips to match his thrusts. I could feel my core knotting again. Suddenly, he took one of my buds into his mouth, pushing me over the edge. He gave a few more thrusts before pulling out and releasing on my stomach.
I smiled, "I love you, Matt. You know, I missed you a lot when you were gone, but I'm happy now." He laid me down and laid next to me before pulling the blanket over us, "I love you and I'm happy too, (Y/n)."
Smut over! Story continues here!
However, not all good things can last. After that week, Matt went back to being a workaholic. We barely saw each other and it was like I didn't exist to him. Then, even on his days off, he never stayed home. He would leave the house for hours and come back late at night. I worried for him.
That's when I found out about everything.
The parties.
The drinking.
The drugs.
And the girls.
He had cheated on me so many times. Because of this, I slowly reverted back to my insecure, unconfident self. I decided to confront him one day. We were eating dinner. I spoke, "Do you love me, Matt?" He looked at me, "Of course I love you (Y/n)." I frowned, "Then what about the girls? The parties? Am I that insignificant to you?" He sighed, "I didn't want you to find out this way. It didn't mean anything to me. I love you."
I stood up from my seat, "I remember years ago when I met you, someone told me I should take caution when it comes to love. I did." I continued, "You were strong and I was not. My illusion. My mistake." He spoke, "I'm sorry." I shook my head, "I was careless! I forgot. I did." I headed to the bedroom and started packing my bags. He followed me. I sighed.
"Falling out of love is hard. Falling for betrayal is worse. Broken trust and broken hearts..." I zipped up my bags, "If you're done with embarrassing me, empty promises will wear." I picked up my bags and started walking past him when he grabbed my wrist, "Please don't go." I pulled away from him, "You built me up and you broke me down. And now I realize, I was never really confident in myself. I only believed in your words and the way they covered up the pain."
I felt a tear run down my cheek, "You will never understand what its like to feel like a dragon in a crowd of mice. Wings molted, talons broken from the struggle to free yourself of your own skin!" I bit my lip, "So no! I will not stay where I know I am not wanted!" With that, I ran out to my car and drove away, leaving Matt and our relationship far behind me.
That day, my heart and my trust were completely shattered. And like I told Matt, confidence and security can either break you down or build you up. I've only ever known self hate and self doubt. Always questioning any compliment or praise I received. So from that day on, I swore to never ever love anyone ever again.