Beyoncé July 27, 2016
I sat on my bed, picking at the comforter, procrastinating. The last thing I wanted to do was call her. I knew she must've been pissed that I'd kept this from her.
Jay paused his unpacking to look up at me. "You're gonna have to talk to her eventually. Mama T invited her to the cookout, so you're gonna see her."
I groaned. "This is all your fault. You know that, right? All I wanted to do was fix things before I got more people involved, and now you've taken that choice from me. And to top it all off, my whole family's gonna be mad that I wasn't the one who told them. You had no right to insert yourself into my business."
He scrunched up his face. "Your business? Last time I checked this is my family too."
"You don't get it, Jay! You really don't, and you never will, because unlike me, you get to actually be her parent. Don't think I didn't hear her call you 'Dad'. She still won't even shorten my name to 'Bey'. So don't act all high and mighty like you understand the shit I'm being put through. Sarayah has done nothing but show the utmost disdain for me, and now you're about to let my whole family watch. You don't see something wrong with that?"
"Listen Bey. I know it's hard, which is why I let you do things your way for so long. But shit ain't getting better. If I honestly thought you two could figure things out on your own, I would have gladly stayed out of it. But it's been over three weeks, Bey. I get that you don't want to be embarrassed, but you can't keep hiding our child. Most of the family still thought Sarayah was missing or dead. You don't see something wrong with that?"
He closed his suitcase and left the room. I couldn't say I was surprised. His patience with me seemed to be decreasing with each passing day.
I sighed, returning my attention to my phone. I couldn't put this off any longer. I unlocked my phone and called her, mentally preparing myself for the wrath of Kelendria Trene Rowland. She picked up on the last ring.
"Hmph."
I cringed. "Hey Kellz."
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME WITH THIS SHIT, GISELLE!?! DON'T YOU 'HEY KELLZ' ME, BITCH. 'KELLZ' IS RESERVED FOR MY FRIENDS. CLEARLY THAT AIN'T YOUR SNEAKY, SLITHERING, LYING, DISLOYAL–"
I sighed. "Kelly–"
"SERPENT-LOVING, PUNK ASS! AND DON'T YOU 'KELLY' ME EITHER!"
I could hear her breath heaving through the phone as she tried to calm herself down.
"Kelly–"
"How could you just sit there and lie? I asked you straight up who the girl in the picture was. I asked you. It took me so long to even work up the courage to touch on that subject because I was so afraid of upsetting you. Of hurting you. I was thinking about you and your feelings, when you clearly didn't give a shit about mine."
My bottom lip trembled. "I'm sorry, Kelly. I really am."
She took a few deep breaths. "Do you know how much I cried after you told me it wasn't her? It brought up all the shit from the past. And there you were, knowing she was safe and sound the whole fucking time."
"I'm sorry. I am so sorry. I don't know what else to say."
"We all loved her, Bey, in case you forgot. She was our family too, blood or no blood. How could you keep this from us?"
I sniffled. "I don't know."
"BULLSHIT, BEY. BULL FUCKING SHIT. I AM YOUR BEST FRIEND. YOU TELL ME EVERYTHING FROM WHAT YOUR SHIT LOOKS LIKE TO JAY CHEATING ON YOU. SO WHY COULDN'T YOU TELL ME THEY FOUND OUR BABY GIRL?"
I brushed away my tears. "I don't know."
"STOP LYING."
"I WAS EMBARRASSED OKAY?" I burst out, finally snapping. "HOW DO YOU TELL PEOPLE THAT THE DAUGHTER YOU'VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND FOR 11 YEARS HATES YOU?"
She was silent on the other end. "Just like that, Bey. You don't have to filter yourself with me. I will never judge you. You should know that, and that's what really hurts. You couldn't trust me. I had to hear it from your cousin, your fucking cousin, and not even one you like. She called me up talking to me like I already knew. I had to sit there and act like my whole world hadn't changed. How fucked up is that?"
"I fucked up, okay? It's all I seem to do lately. You'll see that when you get here. I'm a mess."
She kissed her teeth. "Don't try to make me feel sorry for your pathetic ass. I'm still mad."
I nodded. "I figured, but you're gonna forgive me eventually, right? Because we're sisters, and you love me unconditionally?"
She was silent for a few seconds. "You should already know the answer to that, Bey, but apparently you don't and that speaks to a scary truth."
I frowned. "Kelly, I'm sorry. I do know you love me, and I love you too. I am sincerely sorry for overlooking that. You are my sister, and I need you, especially now. Just tell me you'll forgive me."
Another pause. I gnawed on my lip anxiously. I couldn't have Kelly hating me too. That would kill me.
She sighed. "I'll see you in a couple days. Expect an ass whoopin'."
I smiled, knowing that meant she would forgive me. "Okay, I love you..."
She hung up. I guess I should have expected that. I went back to my contacts and clicked on Michelle's name. She picked up on the last ring. Petty.
"Hmph."
I sighed. So much for it going better than my call with Kelly.
After being lectured by Chelle for 15 solid minutes, I walked downstairs. Julez and Sarayah were in the living room playing Mario Kart. They were really getting along. Of course they were. How could Sarayah be evil to me 24/7 if she wasted her material on other people?
Sarayah looked up, saw me and rolled her eyes. I glared at her and walked to the kitchen, sitting at the table. As soon as I sat down, the doorbell rang. I groaned, looking up at the ceiling in frustration.
"God must really hate me," I muttered before getting up.
The moment I opened the door, I was greeted by the back of a hand. I fell to the floor, holding my cheek in shock.
"DAAAAAAMN ALI. You said you were gonna slap her, not knock her out!" Came a raspy voice I recognized.
"I did slap her. She's just weak," answered a smooth, indignant voice.
I looked up to see Kelly standing over me, arms crossed. She looked pissed. She really wasn't kidding about that ass whoopin'. I rubbed my cheek. It hurt like a bitch. I could already feel it beginning to swell. Kelly was so damn heavy-handed.
"You feel better now?" I asked, holding my cheek protectively.
She examined her knuckles. "To be honest, no. Expect aggression, both outright and passive, for the next few days."
I narrowed my eyes. "I don't see Titan. You leave him at home, so he wouldn't see his mama sucker punch his favorite aunt?"
Michelle scrunched up her face looking at Kellz. "I don't know about favorite. Would you say favorite, Kellz?"
Kelly made a face, shaking her head. "Definitely not." She turned back to me. "And you can calm down, that was a slap. But to answer your question, no. I didn't leave Titan at home. Tim's just bringing him on a later flight."
"Sounds like the same thing to me," I muttered.
Sarayah walked into the hall and looked between us. She looked at me lying on the floor, injured, and Kelly standing over me.
"You hit her?" She asked Kelly, confused. Maybe I was hallucinating, but I detected a hint of accusation in her tone. Maybe she did care.
Kelly shifted from foot to foot. I doubted she wanted her reintroduction to Sarayah to be highlighted by violence.
"I did," she admitted, looking down.
Sarayah frowned at her before going to the kitchen. She came back with an ice pack. She walked over to us, and I held out my hand, ready to ice my cheek. She looked at me like I was crazy before turning to face Kelly.
"You're gonna need this. She's hard-headed." Sarayah said, handing the pack to Kelly.
I stared up at them in shock. Kelly burst out laughing, accepting the pack of ice. She looked Sarayah up and down.
"Okay, I see you. You really have changed. Mini Bey no more. You still look like her though."
Chelle laughed pushing Kelly. "Well, not anymore, now that you slapped the melanin outta Bey."
"She'll be aight." Kelly and Sarayah said at the same time.
I stood up and dusted myself off. "Well, I'm glad you're bonding over my pain."
Sarayah barely spared me a glance. "You probably deserved it."
Kelly nodded. "She sure did, but let's move on from that. I'm starting to think she's suffered enough." She looked between the two of us, before letting her eyes rest on Sarayah. "Plus, I'm more interested in getting to know my niece."
I watched the two of them walk to the kitchen. Michelle hung around. I leaned against the wall, facing her.
She looked at me, concerned. "Has it been like this since she came back?"
I sighed. "Mostly. There were a few moments here and there in the beginning when she was actually nice to me. Now it's worse though. The only time we talk is when she wants to hurt me in a more direct way."
I said it all in a matter-of-fact tone, but Michelle still pulled me into a hug, rubbing my back soothingly.
"It won't be like this forever, Bey Bey."
I shrugged. "It probably will be. She's so damn stubborn."
Michelle laughed, pulling away from me. "Yeah, wonder where she got that from."
I frowned. "I wish people would stop saying that. I'm really not that stubborn."
"Okay, Bey. Whatever you say. Come on." She grabbed my arm. "Let's get some ice on that cheek."
I sighed, letting her guide me to the kitchen, where Kelly and Sarayah were sitting. Kelly was making herself a sandwich. She looked up at me and handed me a pack of ice. I smiled in thanks. I knew Kelly felt bad. She would never admit it though. She nodded at me and went back to making her sandwich. I leaned against the counter, hungrily eying Kelly's sandwich. I wondered if she would feel bad enough to give me half. It was worth a shot. I exaggerated my pout, waiting for a reaction.
"So, what do I call you guys?" Sarayah asked.
Kelly and Michelle shared a look then frowned at her.
"Whatchyou mean, child? We're your aunties." Michelle replied. "We don't play that first name nonsense like Solo. You can call me Aunty Chelle or Aunty Michelle, and you can call Mike Tyson over there Aunty Kellz or Aunty Kelly."
Kelly shot her a look, but Michelle just smiled back, innocently batting her eyelashes.
Sarayah nodded, "Okay, sounds good, Aunty Chelle."
Kelly placed her sandwich on a plate then slid it over to Sarayah. I rolled my eyes. Of course. Sarayah beamed up at her, dimples all showing. She looked adorable: like a little angel. I scowled. Con artist.
"Thank you, Aunty Kellz."
Michelle laughed. "We've been here all of five minutes, and you already spoiling the child."
"Hey, you guys have 11 years of spoiling to make up for. I deserve this sandwich." Sarayah said, shaking her sandwich at Michelle before taking a huge bite out of it.
Solange walked down the stairs, glaring at us. "Well look who just waltzed on into my house without so much as a 'hello', or a 'where's Solo'."
Michelle rolled her eyes. "Girl bye. No one came to see you. You know we only care about our nieces, our nephew, and our best friend, Alan. Plus, we knew you were upstairs sleeping."
Kelly laughed. "Yeah, we didn't have to ask. If we don't hear your loud ass voice that can only mean one thing. You're asleep."
"And judging by your nappy head, you slept REAL good," Michelle added, cracking up.
Kelly looked up at Solo and burst out laughing. Solo scowled at them but smoothed down her bed head.
"They already tag teaming. Who invited Ren and Stimpy anyway?"
Mama walked into the kitchen with a load of groceries. "Me. This is my house remember?"
She set down her groceries, smiling at Kelly and Michelle. "Hey babies."
They ran over to her to get their hugs, smirking at Solange. Solange rolled her eyes and started putting away the groceries. Sarayah got up to help, but Mama waved her away smiling kindly.
"Don't worry about this. Sit down and enjoy your food, baby." Then she turned to me, giving me the stank eye. "Beyoncé get your lazy behind up and help."
Sarayah stifled a laugh, unsuccessfully, because I still heard it. I pursed my lips and put down my ice pack. Mama paused, studying my face. She walked over to Kelly and hit her upside her head.
"Don't be hitting people in my house, starting fights and breaking things."
Kelly rubbed her head, pouting. Michelle laughed. "Don't worry Mama T, the only thing she broke was Bey's face."
I punched her in the shoulder and was immediately popped in the head by Mama.
"What did I just say? Did Kelly knock the sense out your head too?"
Sarayah shook her head. "Didn't I tell you guys? Hard-headed."
I turned to her. "Keep making them slick comments, and Imma smack the smart right outta your mouth."
She frowned, quietly going back to her sandwich. Mama looked between us disapprovingly. She gave me a pointed look, and I shrugged. What did she expect from me? That child was impossible.
"So, Beyoncé, when are you planning on showing your daughter around Houston? I'm sure she'd like to see where she spent her early years, not to mention where you and Solo grew up."
"I thought you grew up here?" She asked offhandedly, picking lettuce out of her teeth.
"Huh? Oh, no." I answered, shocked she was speaking to me. I guess the food was putting her in a better mood or distracting her. Either way, I was happy.
"No, we had to move a few times," I finished, still watching her.
"Oh," she mumbled, fixing the falling pieces of her sandwich.
I stared at her. "So, do you want to go?"
She shrugged, finishing off her sandwich in one huge bite. Kelly reached over and poked her full cheek.
"Come on, it'll be fun. I can show you all the spots where me and Bey would hang out."
Solo made a face. "No one wants to see your lame hang out spots."
Kelly smirked. "You just mad 'cause we left your young ass behind."
Mama smacked her. "Don't be swearing in my house."
Kelly rubbed the side of her face. Michelle cackled. "Dang Kelly. You about two slaps away from looking like Bey's twin."
Kelly popped her in the head and immediately got backhanded by Mama. Michelle laughed harder.
"Make that one slap."
Sarayah watched the whole exchange, cracking up. Evil little child. I shook my head, smiling.
Kelly rolled her eyes at Michelle, before turning back to Sarayah. "So, what do you say, baby girl?"
Sarayah nodded, still chuckling. "Yeah, okay. That could be cool."
Solo perked up. "I'm driving!"
"NO!" Kelly, Michelle and I shouted in unison, while Sarayah smiled and nodded enthusiastically.