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THE PAST
His mother was super friendly. She handed Jordy a glass of juice and pushed her into the couch.
"Where did you meet Emilio?" she asked with so much enthusiasm that Jordy began to suspect that Emilio had never taken a girl home.
"We're in the same class," she told the woman. "My best friend is dating his best friend, so I thought it was about time we'd hang out."
There were footsteps on the stairs, and a moment later he entered the living room, this time fully clothed. He looked at her with a face like thunder. Jordy however still found him smoking hot.
"Well, c'mon then," he grumbled.
His mother clicked with her tongue, showing her disapproval. "This isn't how I raised you, Emilio; leaving girls at the door."
"I do when they are looking like fucking parrots and sound just as fucking annoying," he huffed.
"You think you sound like a little angel this morning?" Juan grinned, bumping his shoulder as he walked into the room, giving Jordy a wink.
If she hadn't known that he was here, Jordy doubted she had dared to go to his house. It had been a true relief to know that Juan knew about her plan and that he would push Emilio to come with her. Nevertheless, she had been so nervous that she hadn't slept at all tonight. Which was stupid; she had known beforehand how he would respond to her.
And still it hurt that he hated being around her. Well, hopefully he would change his mind today. She finished her drink and put the glass on the table.
"Okay sunshine, let's go. Before you change your mind." She gave Emilio's mother a friendly smile and hugged Juan, whispering "thank you" in his ear.
Emilio didn't say a word while he followed her to the car. Right before they left his house, he put a baseball cap on his head which he pulled over his eyes, as if he was afraid that people would recognize him.
"We're gonna leave the city," she said. "We won't come across people we know."
With a surly face he stared forward.
Jordy was not put off by his behavior and she switched on the cd-player. "You did anything fun since the holidays have started?" she asked while putting on the direction indicator and turning right.
"Can we not do this? I don't want to talk to you. Just drag me to whatever place you have in mind and leave me alone. The only reason I'm here is because Juan promised you and he's getting me a hot chick later to help me forget about your ugly face."
His words hurt, and again she wondered why the hell she was torturing herself like this. He was a first-class asshole. Maybe this day was needed to fully realize that.
"You're stuck with me for the next hours," she said stubbornly. "Trust me – if you at least try to have fun the time's gonna pass faster."
Emilio snorted dismissively, pulling his cap further over his eyes. "Just wake me up when we are at whatever shitty place you're takin' me."
. . .
After half an hour Jordy parked the car in front of a lunch room. Emilio hadn't said another word. She didn't know if he was really sleeping or just pretending, but when she softly shook his shoulder he gave her a dirty look.
"I'm not hungry," he grunted as he saw the restaurant.
"You were wearing boxers when you opened the door, so I assume you haven't had breakfast."
"If I'd known you'd be there I'd put on a turtleneck," he grunted.
She raised her eyebrows. "Why? Did I make you feel uncomfortable? You had a nice sixpack man, there's nothing to be ashamed of."
His hand shot to the door handle; he opened the door, got out of the car and slammed the door shut.
Sighing, Jordy raked a hand through her hair. She had hoped that he would defrost once they had left Queens, but not at all. She left the car as well. He was already at the entrance, peeking inside as if he was still afraid to see people he knew.
She actually felt sorry for him; that he cared so much about what others were thinking of him that he didn't even dare to walk on the street with a blue haired girl. The moment she stood next to him, he slipped inside as if he was afraid that she would grab his hand.
She wouldn't. She knew he didn't want it and she wouldn't force herself even more on him. Her mission for today was proving him that she was nice company – and not anything romantic.
If that would ever happen at all, they probably needed a lot of dates.
Emilio sat down in the darkest corner, staring restlessly past her while she took a seat across from him. With his elbows he was resting on the table, his head leaning in the palm of his hand while he was trying to look indifferent.
Jordy glanced at his handsome face; his dark eyebrows, deep brown eyes, tan skin and the stubble on his cheeks, making him look older than most boys of his age.
"So what's the most annoying thing about me, E?" she asked. One way or the other; she wanted to have conversation with him. Maybe this turned out to be an easy topic for him.
He raised his eyebrows. "Why the hell do you wanna know that?"
She shrugged her shoulders. "Call it curiosity. You're always talkin' everyone's ears off; there has to be a reason why you're so quiet today."
"Just got nothin' to tell a whore like you."
She studied his face. "Do you even know yourself?"
"Do I know what?" he snapped.
"Why it's such a big deal for you to spend a few hours with me. What else would you have done today?"
"I planned to go to the beach and watch some tits."
She rolled eyes. "Sometimes it's hard to believe that you're sixteen instead of twelve."
His jaws tensed.
"You disagree?" Jordy asked. "Back then you already sneaked into our dressing room to watch us. You'd think someone would grow up a little since 8th grade."
He squeezed his eyes, his irises flaring up like wood in a fire. "Either way, you're just as ugly as you were back then, without tits and even skinnier than a skeleton. You're one of those whores who're starvin' themselves? Like you're not gettin' enough attention with that blue hair and retarded leopard spots."
"If I suffered from anorexia, we wouldn't have been in restaurant right now," she answered calmly. Her eyes didn't let go of his; she wondered where this was coming from, so all of a sudden. Did he feel ashamed of what he had done and was that the reason he was directing the attention back to her?
"Why not? You can go right to the toilets and puke your guts out. Maybe you should teach that fat friend of yours some of these tricks; then we don't feel like throwing up every time that cow's waddling by."
"You can also look the other way. There are plenty of other girls to look at."
Angry, he snatched the menu out of the hands of the waitress when she wanted to offer it to them.
"Sorry," she said to the girl. "It's the first time in his life that he's on a date, so he feels a little uncomfortable." She took the menu from the woman. "Thank you."
The scorching gaze with which he looked at her, made her smirk. "I don't care if you're smiling or scowling; I find you hot anyway." She winked at him and turned her attention to the menu. "What are you hungry for?" Her eyes wandered down the dishes. "I think I'm goin' for an omelet with bacon."
Emilio didn't answer and stared at the menu stubbornly.
"You know... It's kinda cute that you don't know how to behave around me."
"That you don't like how I behave, doesn't mean that I don't know how to behave," he grunted. "I think you're just a stupid attention whore with the worst taste in clothes I've ever seen, and you're right; I don't really know how to deal with the fact that you can't take a 'no' when someone turns you down, and that you practically forced me to go on a date with you."
"To be honest I think that you're just scared that you'll accidentally start to like me, and that that's the reason why you're such an ass. I see right through that, you know. I'm not the type of girl who's gonna cry in a corner cause Emilio Sanchez is sayin' hurtful things to her. I don't give a fuck about the opinion of someone who's complainin' about everythin' and everyone he sees. As for me, you can stop tryin' to hurt me, cause you're only repeatin' yourself. I knew all along how you felt about me. The only thing I'm tryin' to show you, is that you can also have fun with girls who haven't ran away from a porn studio. Yeah, maybe it's a different kind of fun than you have with your blonde bimbo's, but it will be something you're gonna remember after 24 hours. I have planned some cool things for today; it's up to you if you enjoy them or if you keep moping because you couldn't go to the beach to stare at the breasts of sunbathing girls like you're some fucking twelve year old."
She lifted the corner of her mouth as a whiff of red spread across his cheeks, and frustrated he gritted his teeth. He turned his attention back to the menu.
"Just gimme a grilled cheese sandwich."
A small smile crossed Jordy's lips as she placed the order.
. . .
Her speech was paying off. During lunch she asked him some questions he didn't ignore this time; he answered them reluctantly. He never asked her a question, but she didn't mind. She told him just as enthusiastic about herself.
When they were back in the car, Emilio felt even so comfortable that he opened the glove box to look for "something else than this fucking noise".
"I got one album of Eminem; you're not gonna find any other hiphop shit, sorry."
"Eminem is fine," he muttered. "Everything is better than this fucking trash."
She smirked and peeked at him from the corner of her eye. His face was more relaxed, a little more open and he had taken off his baseball cap. When they drove up the parking lot of the outdoor survival park and left the car, he even offered her a cigarette as he lit up one himself.
Jordy took it from him and shoved it between her lips. To her surprise, he shielded the thing off with his hand and lit the cigarette himself; his face coming so close to hers that she could hear the blood rush in her ears while her lips were getting dry.
"I didn't know you were a smoker," he said.
"Sometimes." She smirked. "But I wouldn't want our first kiss to taste like my tongue was rolling through an ash tray."
He rolled his eyes. "No need to be afraid of that. I'd bite off your tongue before you get that far."
She chuckled softly. "I bet my tongue's stronger than yours."
He raised his chin, looking pensively at her. For a moment she thought he wanted to accept the challenge, then he blew out a cloud of smoke. "We'll never know."
They headed for the entrance where Jordy paid for the climbing trail and the karting, where after they were picked up by an instructor.
Emilio didn't say much. It was bothering her; she had really thought that he would like something as adventurous as a climbing trail and abseiling, but he didn't look very excited.
"You can go first," he muttered after they had listened to the instructions.
"Okey-dokey. You've done this before?"
He shrugged his shoulders. "A few times."
Jordy nodded – good, than he'd probably like it. She secured herself and started to climb. She had also done it before, but never here. Enthusiastically she climbed bridge after bridge; the obstacles were getting a little more difficult each time. The adrenaline was rushing through her veins and she gave a little scream when she was almost losing her balance on a moving piece of wood. Right before she fell, she could grab the thick rope above her head.
Laughing, she looked over her shoulder.
Emilio was way behind her, and when he looked up, he motioned her to move on. Jordy wasn't in the mood for another discussion and gave in, although she'd liked it more if they had done this together.
By now they were at a height of 30 meters. Before her was a very long bridge consisting of various three trunks. They were wobbling like crazy, and excitement spread through her body while she slowly climbed further. Halfway was a platform where she took a rest and waited for Emilio.
He however moved slowly – very slowly.
After a while she noted that he was standing still and staring into the depth.
She frowned. Was he okay? She grabbed the ropes and shuffled back, one foot at a time. The logs were swinging from left to right.
"Hey, you okay?" she asked when there were only two trunks between Emilio and her. He hadn't moved, his knuckles had paled because his hands were clenched so tight around the rope and he was still staring down.
"Just move on," he snapped back. "I'm just a little dizzy." His voice cracked.
He didn't look to the side. She saw how he briefly wiped his cheek with his shoulder.
With a pit in her stomach Jordy came closer. His hands were shaking and again he rubbed his eyes with his arm, pushing the helmet more to the left.
"You cryin'?" she asked shocked as she saw something shine on his cheek.
"Just go okay!" he yelled, but right after his words a sob escaped his lips.
Jordy's stomach cringed. She ignored his snark and walked towards him. This could only happen to her; making her date cry.
"Fuck off Jordy, I'm serious!" he grumbled.
"I'm not leavin' you like this," she answered stubbornly. "What's wrong?"
Finally he looked up. His face was pale, tears were shining in his eyes. "You happy now?" he snapped. "This what you wanted? Is this your revenge because I'm such a dick? What are ya gonna do now, pushin' me down? You're gonna unclip that thing now?"
"Don't be such an idiot," she answered, shaking her head. "Come on, you can't stand here like this forever Emilio."
"You think I wanna stay here?" he snapped. "My whole body's just blocked!" His lips quivered, a tear ran down his cheek. Wildly, he snapped his head the other way.
He was scared, she realized. "You're afraid of heights?" she asked overwhelmed.
"No I'm cryin' because I'm havin' so much fun!"
"Why didn't you tell me before we started? We could have done something else!"
He didn't answer and tightened his grasp around the rope.
With a sigh, she crossed the last trunk that separated them. "Don't freak out," she said, "I'm steppin' on yours and it's gonna wiggle."
Emilio said nothing. She could hear his troubled breathing.
She moved her hands a little, stepping over the gap between the two trunks. A whimper left his lips as her foot landed on the piece of wood he was standing on, by which it swung back and forth.
She laid a hand against his cheek, making him look up. It was surreal to see someone like Emilio with tears in his eyes, and it didn't leave her indifferent. Never before she had wanted to hug someone so badly.
"You're secured, sweetie," she said calmly. "Even if you slip, nothing can happen to you. We're gonna finish this bridge together, then we go down with the emergency stairs. Okay?"
He took a deep breath and nodded.
"Just follow my lead, okay? Put your feet where I put them."
Slowly, she started to move. Their pace was so low that she walked backwards. Emilio's eyes shot from the wood to her face – at least he was no longer looking down.
By the time they had reached the platform, he looked so pale that she was afraid that he would faint. There was still a high stairs they needed to descend; he wasn't done yet.
Emilio panted, his eyes still wide because of the panic. Now they had a little more room, she could no longer hold herself back and she gave him a big squeezing hug.
"You did great!"
He didn't push her away; instead she felt his shaking hands against her back. She knew him well enough to know that this was the most humiliating thing that had ever happened to him, but at least he was accepting help now.
She kept holding him until his breathing had normalized and his hands stopped trembling. When she let go of him, he turned his head away; his face red of shame.
Jordy acted like she hadn't noticed and walked across the platform towards the emergency stairs.
"You can go first," she said. "I'll check if you're secured well."
He nodded silently, attached the hook to the steel cable and sat down on the wood.
"Just look up," she told him.
He grabbed the railing of the stairs and turned around until his feet had found the steps. Then he descended the stairs, step by step. Jordy waited a moment, then she went down herself so she could support him when he was getting another panic attack.
Now and then she looked down between her feet, giving him an encouraging smile when their eyes met. Halfway he needed a little break to take a few deep breaths; then he pulled through until he reached the ground.
As soon as he had loosened himself, he turned away from her and stared into the distance. She could feel the shame radiating from him.
Hesitating, she came closer and laid a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, E-"
"Why can you never do something normal?" he burst out. "Who does something like this on a date! What's wrong with going to the movies?!"
"I thought something casual would bore you – would bore both of us," she said softly. "How was I supposed to know that you're terrified of heights! You even told me you'd done it before!"
He gritted his teeth. "And what if I'd told you the truth? You'd told me to stop bein' a baby."
"I never would have said that. Phobias are serious shit; I'd never push you to do this if I'd known about your fears. It's nothing to be ashamed of."
He made a face. "Can we go home now?"
Disappointed, Jordy's shoulders slumped down. "Let's drink a cup of coffee and see if you're in the mood to do something else in fifteen minutes. I've already paid for the karting."
Grumbling, he agreed.
Jordy noticed that he was avoiding her glance when they sat down at a booth a little later, both with a cup of coffee in front of them. She understood why he felt ashamed; he was the type of guy pretending he wasn't afraid of anything.
"You're gonna tell 'em?" he asked after a while. He stared into the dark drink.
"Tell who what?"
"You know, the people at school. June. Juan. That you saw me cryin'."
She looked pensively at his face. "It's tempting," she admitted. "You're making fun of people all the time."
He said nothing.
"But no, that's not me. I won't tell anyone if you don't want me to. Not even June."
"And Juan?" His voice trembled.
Jordy raised her eyebrows. "He's your best friend. He doesn't know about it?"
Silently, he shook his head. A red glow spread across his cheeks.
"He won't –"
"He can't know, okay! He's gonna think that I'm a pussy."
"You're not a pussy. I think it calls for some serious balls that you still gave it a shot."
Skittishly, he looked up. Seeing him so vulnerable did something with her. She laid her hand on top of his, squeezing it. He didn't pull away.
"I won't tell anyone, okay? I promise. But please, let's do a round of cart. This whole day is a failure if I haven't seen you smile. And to be honest karting is scaring me to death, so you're gonna have your fun."
A hint of smile crossed his face. He raised his head a little and she noticed that he was looking at their hands.
Inside her stomach something seemed to explode; tinglings were racing through her whole body because he didn't pull back his hand.
"We can take a duo cart? If it scares you? At least for the first round?"
Jordy had the feeling she was hallucinating. Was Emilio really suggesting that? When she didn't answer, his face tensed as if he had also realized that he had said something really sweet.
"Never mind," he muttered.
"No," she said quickly. "I eh – I would really like that."
Her cheeks flushed when he looked up and showed her an almost shy smile, as if he secretly liked the idea that she felt safer next to him than alone in a cart.
"Okay, let's go. We're gonna put up a new record," he said,
His usual smirk returned – but this time it wasn't a mocking one. Jordy felt the heat spread through her stomach and she jumped up, suddenly feeling so enthusiast she could no longer sit still.
Although she had secretly wished that this whole date would be a big turn-off because there was no point in falling for him, she had now seen a side of him that had made her feelings at least ten times worse.
That unexpected vulnerable side that Juan had shown June, didn't seem to be foreign to his best friend at all – precisely what she had been hoping for.
. . .
Hey! I wanted to clarify that Emilio's fear of heights is restricted to great heights (when you won't survive a fall), which explains why he had no trouble sitting on the windowsill in the previous chapter. ;)