Setting: Demi's Apartment, Hollywood Hills, CA
Demi jolted awake, releasing a loud scream as she saw the figure hovering above her, but then settling down once the light was turned on and she saw that it was just Max. It was always just Max, and she should've grown used to the alarmed look on his face everytime he had to wake her up from one of her nightmares, but she couldn't.
"You were screaming again," he said as Demi nodded because she knew that she was screaming and she had woken up, the same way she had woken him up the night before that and the night before that one too. She was always waking him up and she was starting to feel terrible about it, but she was too afraid to send him away.
"Demi, maybe you should go see Arnold," Max lightly suggested, because he knew it wasn't his place. His job was to keep her safe. She didn't want to hear his opinion outside of that.
"I'm fine," she breathed out, rubbing at her tired eyes. She knew Max was tired of her. She was kind of tired of herself, if she was being completely honest. But she was trying to deal with this on her own.
"You're not. You have these night terrors and when I wake you up you look at me like I'm him...like I'm going to hurt you. You don't sleep. You don't eat. You can't even move around this apartment without me being right by your side. You're not fine, Demi. You're paranoid, and I understand why but it is my job to keep you safe. He may be out of jail but he's not coming anywhere near you ever again. Isn't that what I promised you after New York?" Max reassured her, causing Demi to weakly nod.
"I just don't like seeing you like this," Max uttered out in defeat, causing Demi to nod again. "I'm right down the hall if you need me."
Then he left the room, returning to his own, and Demi sat in bed for a little while before she pushed the suffocating white duvet off of her body and made her way to the bathroom. Since she was living alone - besides Max - there was no need to hide the little bottle of blue pills that she had to get refilled after Trey threw them. She untwisted the white cap, dumping three of them into her palm before closing it again and swallowing them dry. The directions say one every four to six hours, but that did nothing for her. One wasn't enough. Three was just right. She ran the water and cupped her hands underneath it, swallowing a little bit of it before she turned it off and ran her hands over her face. She was safe. No one was coming to get her. She could sleep in peace. No one was going to hurt her. No one was going to hurt her. She was okay.
"I am okay," she chanted as she stared at her disheveled appearance in the mirror. Her weight had drastically changed, and that was reflected in her face. Deep bags were underneath her eyes, making it look as though she hadn't slept in weeks. Anyone who saw her would be afraid, would be worried, would be sympathetic. But no one would see her. She had broken up with Trey. She hadn't talked to Kylie after their blow out in New York. After ignoring everyone else's attempts at contact, they had just stopped trying. Except for Kris. Every night, she texted her "I love you." One of these days, she was actually going to respond.
Demi found that when she couldn't sleep at night, it was much easier to fall asleep at random times during the day. Like when she forced Max to sit next to her on the couch and watch the ID channel and she ended up nodding off with her head resting on his shoulder. Or when she finished taking her dogs for a walk and after giving them some much deserved treats, she felt herself begin to fall asleep at the end of her bed. Or now, when she had decided to take a bath to try to calm herself down while Max went downstairs to retrieve their takeout, and she could feel her eyelids get heavy, and that breathlessness that came along with being so tired, and she could feel herself sinking deeper into that water that had been colored blue thanks to a bath bomb that had been sent to her in a Lush PR packagae.
She was just so tired, but she couldn't find peace at night when everything was shrouded in darkness, when images of the man that had invaded her privacy in the worse way flashed through her mind, when she was so convinced that he was there in her apartment, staring at her as she slept, making a move to remove the blanket that she buried herself under to take advantage of her in the worst way possible. No. It was too scary sleeping at night, even with Max and Sugar there to protect her. Even when she lived in an apartment building where you had to be buzzed in twice before you even reached the elevators. Even when Max constantly assured her that she was safe. She could never find peace, and she had worked very hard to make sure that her lack of peace didn't effect anyone else around her. That's why she was alone. That's why she had broken up with Trey. That's why she hadn't answered Kris's texts.
"DEMETRIA DEVONNE LOVATO!" Demi didn't realize that she had sunken so low in the water until someone was pulling her up, and she sputtered out what she had accidentally inhaled as a towel was thrown at her chest, and she weakly caught it. Opening her eyes, she rolled them - hard - when she saw who was standing in front of her: Dianna.
"Demetria Devonne Lovato, are you kidding me right now?" Dianna's face was red. She was angry. She looked like she could breathe fire out of her nostrils at any moment, and there was never a time that Demi thought that her mother hated her. Dianna was harsh, and she was a fire breathing stage mom who pushed her daughter past her own limits, but hate? Nope. Not until now. Under her glare, Demi felt the same way she felt as a child. Small. Impotent. Out of control.
"How'd you get in here?" Demi asked as she wrapped the fluffy towel around her body and held it as tight as possible.
"Max," she simply stated as Demi moved around her into her bedroom. Batman and Robin didn't know Dianna, so of course they got a little defensive, Batman barking at her and jumping at her feet to make sure that she didn't get too close to Demi. And Demi didn't even stop them.
"How I got in shouldn't matter, Demetria. I am your mother! And your family hasn't heard from you in months! Shut me out, I don't care, and i stopped caring a long time ago. But Madison? Eddie? I am done with you treating them like shit! The world does not revolve around you, Demetria!" Dianna ranted, but Demi was trying to block her out.
She hated when Dianna yelled at her. It brought back disturbing memories of a childhood where she was the major breadwinner and she was reminded of it everytime she whined about the job that she had to do. And it wasn't just during her pageant days. It was through her brief stunt as a product of Disney, until she freed herself from Dianna's reign. But even then, she still felt that pressure on her chest, and sometimes she felt like it never truly went away.
"I need you to get out of my apartment," she croaked after she had gotten herself dressed. She moved out of her bedroom out to the living room where Max was. She shot him a look and he mouthed "sorry" but she didn't really blame him. Dianna could raise hell and get her way when she wanted to. Where did she think that Demi got it from?
"Excuse me? I don't have to do anything! And I'm not leaving until you get it through your fucked up head that you can't just treat people that you call family like shit. I have had it up to here with you! You're such a selfish bitch, Demetria! You have the world at your fingertips and you take advantage of every single person in it!" Dianna continued as they stood on opposite sides in the marble island in the middle of the kitchen.
"My fucked up head?" Demi repeated in a calm tone. Fighting herself and her own paranoia was enough. She wasn't about to engage in a screaming match with one of the people she despised the most.
"Yes, Demetria, am I speaking fucking Spanish?"
"My fucked up head? Are you serious? As if you're not the one who made me this way? As if you're not the reason why I'm even like this," Demi breathed out as Dianna released a loud scoff.
"You're a grown ass woman, Demetria. Act like it. You're not about to blame me for your problems."
"BUT I AM! I wouldn't be...I would be so much...I would be so normal if it weren't for you! I'd be fine! I wouldn't be battling my mind and all of this shit that you put me through! I'd still be with my husband! I wouldn't even know what shutting people out is because I wouldn't be going through this shit! Do you know how much better my life would be if you were not my mother?" Demi questioned, combing her fingers through her hair as she started to pace, trying to catch her breath as everything that she had been dealing with suddenly hit her all at once. Everything that she had been trying to avoid. Everything that has been troubling her, disturbing her peace and forcing everyone that she loved and cared about out of her life in an attempt to deal with it on her own. But she wasn't dealing with it. She couldn't even sleep at night. She couldn't even leave her apartment without feeling like she was being followed or watched. She was having the worst nightmares, all ending the same way.
"Demi-"
"No, shut up! I've tried to get help, I've tried so hard to move on, I've tried everything! I even tried to tell you and you didn't fucking listen! You never listened. You don't listen," Demi whimpered, locking her fingers in her hair as tears stung at her eyes, temporarily blurring her vision as she felt hands on her arms, but she shrugged them off.
"Dianna you need to go," Max demanded. He was close to her. That's who was trying to hold her, trying to still her pacing, but if she didn't pace she would pass out. She would break down. And Demi refused.
"Tell me what?"
"YOU KNOW WHAT!" Demi screamed, and that's when it became too much for her. She felt her knees hit the ground, and she curled herself into a ball, to protect herself as her thoughts overtook her mind. And she felt that same breathlessness, because she couldn't breathe. She was trying to catch her breath, but she couldn't breathe.
"Oh my gosh, Demi," she heard, but she was too focused on trying to breathe. She just couldn't breathe. The crying, the hyperventilating, the remembering...she couldn't breathe.
"I can't breathe," she choked out, trying to warn them.
They were shuffling around. Someone was on the phone. Someone was rubbing her arm, as if that would help. Time was passing but she didn't know how much. She was still crying. She could feel the hot tears sliding down her face as she tried to remember what Trey had always told her. In through her nose, out through her mouth. In through her nose, out through her mouth. But it wasn't working. It's like she couldn't collect air fast enough and she could feel the fogginess taking over her brain, until it felt like she was floating. And the floating felt better than what she had been feeling for the past few months, so she accepted it, until she was comfortably floating away.
TMZ: BREAKING NEWS! Demi Lovato Checks into Rehab – Demi Lovato Enters Treatment Facility. It has been reported that singer, actress, and model Demi Lovato has been admitted into a rehab facility, but the reason why still remains unknown. Lovato went silent on social media after the random announcement of a single that never dropped. Sources say that 911 was called to Lovato's apartment a few weeks ago, but the reason why remains unknown, but it's been speculated that that 911 call was what led to her admittance. Lovato has now been spotted in Illinois a month after her sudden disappearance. TMZ reached out for comments from the Kardashians, Trey Songz, and others close to her, but there has been no response.