"Even if I was a baby, I wouldn't wet myself." Adi had repeated the words a couple of times. She'd thought more about the phrasing this time, and Toni had cautioned her against saying "I wouldn't just wet myself" or any of the other seemingly-innocuous phrasings that might have come to her mind.
But when Britney asked her what her triggers were, her answer was almost word-for-word the same as before. She couldn't remove suggestions from her mind, but she kept on telling herself those words in any case. Maybe if she concentrated enough, she could take away the suggestion that was causing her the most trouble.
It was lunch break before Adi saw Belle Carter again, and she turned around quickly to make sure Belle didn't see her. If she could manage one day of school without using her diapers, then that might be a first step towards breaking this file's hold over her. So avoiding Belle was a high priority now.
Still, she couldn't help turning around a few seconds later, watching from behind the low fence around the ramp that gave wheelchair access to the basement level of the science building. Not because she wanted to spy on Belle – Adi told herself that she was above such dirty tricks – but because something had grabbed her attention and it took her a few seconds to realise what it was.
"Who's that?" she found herself whispering, as a quick glance back between the railings turned into standing to watch the two talking. Belle looked immaculate as always; rumour had it that she'd invested in the most expensive smudge-free makeup imaginable so she could keep her face perfectly touched up even during matches. But the guy she was talking to was a different kind of spectacular. He was taller than Belle, and from Adi's ground-level viewpoint he could have been a giant. He was wearing a Moistville College sweater that was tight enough to show off all his muscles, and that athletic figure said he spent a lot of his time working out. He had blond hair swept back in a style that might have been the long-lost descendant of a mullet, but somehow rather than making him look like an eighties throwback, if framed his face and drew attention to a jaw you could break rocks with.
The mysterious stranger was talking with an easy grace, one hand or the other always raised in animated gestures as he spoke. It just served to show off his muscles, and when Adi turned her head a little she realised that she wasn't the only person trying to watch this guy without being noticed. Who was he? She was sure she should have recognised him. Either Belle had an older boyfriend, which Adi was sure she would have heard of even if she didn't try to keep up with the vapid gossip of kids less focused on intellectual pursuits, or he was a former student coming back to his old school for some reason.
When Belle came to speak, she wasn't so eloquent. The only gesture she made was with one finger, and her face was red enough to convey the tone of her words even while Adi wasn't close enough to hear the details. She turned on the spot and stormed off, leaving the mysterious stranger looking completely bemused,
Adi wanted to see him turn and leave, because she didn't believe someone like that would be desperate enough to chase after Belle, or to apologise for whatever she'd read into his words. This was a guy who knew what he was doing, he had a kind of quiet confidence, and she so wanted to see that it was possible for a guy to have intelligence and composure to go with those looks.
But she couldn't stay and watch. Belle was storming right towards her, and she turned around as quickly as she could to get out of the enraged socialite's path. As she marched quickly along, she realised that she could have chosen a better place to watch from. The network of yards and alleys that separated the school buildings had few bottlenecks, but the lower walkways that connected the basement doors of a few buildings were narrow and had few places to turn off. She might have thought she was lucky to catch a glimpse of her nemesis from one place she couldn't easily be seen in return, but now she was trapped. She couldn't move faster than Belle's angry stride without running, and that would just draw more attention. She'd just have to move as quickly as she could and hope that the other girl didn't recognise her from behind.
Assuming, of course, that the path past the back of the Aldridge Building wasn't blocked by a couple of carelessly parked bikes. She counted to five under her breath, hoping that Belle would be too focused on her own feelings and breeze past the last junction without seeing her. But when she turned around, she found herself face to face with the popular girl.
"Fuck you!" Belle spat. "Keep out of my business, right? It's nothing to do with you, Juniper!"
She was walking away again before Adi could even respond.
"What the hell?" Adi whispered, as soon as she found her voice. Then she shook her head and walked away in the direction she'd originally been going, to get something to eat. Belle had been right, she knew. It wasn't something Adi should be concerned with. But she just wished she knew who that boy had been.