Sabrina's POV
"Good morning baby" I wake up by the sound of my fiancé's voice
"Hi" I groan. Even though I've been getting a lot of sleep -Shawn is the one who calms down the babies during the night, not because I want him to do it but because he insists that I need rest- I feel super tired and I don't know why, every morning it's a challenge to even get up from the bed.
"How are we feeling today?" He kisses my head and I just groan
"Come on baby, wake up, it's time to feed the babies" He climbs over me
"In five minutes" Shawn starts kissing my neck
"Oh, and what do you wanna do in those five minutes?" I gently push him away
"Not today Shawn..." He stops and sighs
"When then? The gynecologist gave us permission a week ago and we haven't done anything yet"
"I just don't feel like it, can you respect my decision?!" I start crying. Why though? It's not even that serious!
"Wha-Of course I can respect it, I'm sorry..." He gets off me and sits next to me
"I'll feed them this morning" I sit up as well and wipe my tears away
"It's fine Shawn, I'm just over reacting" I sigh
"Are you feeling fine?" I shake my head
"I don't know: every morning is a challenge to get out of bed, I feel always tired and-I don't know I'm just not...happy I guess?" He takes my hands
"Do you wanna go to therapy again?" I nod
"Yeah, I think that I might need it right now..."
"It's fine Sab, I'll call your therapist and see if I can set an appointment for today"
"You don't have to, I can do it al-"
"It's fine, really" I smile and give him a quick peck on the lips
"Thank you, I'll go feed the babies now"
"Okay" I slightly smile at him and walk to the babies' room to feed them.
Shawn's POV
I'm gonna be honest: I already knew that something was off with Sabrina but I didn't know exactly what, Sabrina herself doesn't know what's happening to her and this is worrying me so much! I think that it might be because of all the medicines that she took while she was at the hospital but I'm not really sure, what if it's something more serious?
"Done" Sabrina walks back in the room while holding the twins
"I even changed the diapers" I walk up to her and pick up Harry from her arms
"Perfect" I kiss her head
"How's it possible that something so cute could do something so disgusting?" She asks me and I chuckle
"I really don't know Sab" I gently rock the baby
"I've called the therapist and she said that she's free for a couple of hours this evening"
"That's perfect, I'll always go to therapy from now on"
"What's the reason why you stopped in the first place?"
"I don't know man, I thought I was fine but now I'll always go, just like you"
"Good choice, you'll feel way better, trust me"
"I know Shawn, thank you" She gets on her tiptoes and kiss my cheek
"You're welcome" She then looks down at Alexander with a dead look, I can't see love or happiness in her eyes
"Sab?" I ask a little bit concerned
"Yeah?" She looks back up at me with the same look
"You okay?"
"Yeah yeah I'm fine, why are you asking?"
"Ehm... no reason" I try to brush it off, nothing serious probably
*some hours later, after Sabrina's session with the therapist*
I see Sabrina coming out of the room and I instantly stand up from the chair where I was sitting on
"So? How'd it go?"
"It went well I guess" She looks exactly like before: no enthusiasm of happiness at all
"What do you mean by well?"
"Shawn, can I talk to you for a second?" Miss. Grundy, her therapist, asks me
"Sure" I look back at Sabrina
"Can you take care of the babies?" She nods
"Of course" She sits on a chair and gently moves the stroller back and forth as I leave
"Is everything okay with her?" I already know that something's gotta be off if Miss. Grundy wanted to talk with me and not with her
"Shawn, she needs to see a psychiatrist" I frown
"What? Why?"
"I think that she might be dealing with postpartum depression"
"What?" I'm confused as hell
"I'm only a therapist so I can't diagnose her but she has all the symptoms"
"Like what?"
"I can't tell you what we've talked about during about our session but I can only say that she has severe mood swings, cries too much, has some difficulty bonding with the twins, loss of appetite, she is unable to sleep properly, is fatigued, doesn't enjoy doing the activities that she loved the most, is in a constant state of irritability and anger, plus, she fears that she might not be a good mother" I start biting my nails
"And these are only few of the symptoms I've noticed"
"So what now?"
"I highly recommend you to go and see a psychiatrist to diagnose her, like I said, I'm only a therapist, I might be wrong" I nod
"Thank you" She smiles politely at me
"You're welcome" I turn around and walk back to my family. How in hell am I gonna say to Sabrina all of this?!
"Hey, what did she want to tell you?" I chuckle nervously as I start pushing the stroller to go back home
"Oh nothing serious you know um..." She walks beside me and raises her eyebrows
"She just told me that you should probably see a psychiatrist" I casually say
"What? Why? Is there something wrong with me?" I can see tears forming in her eyes, one of those symptoms...
"Of course not baby" I kiss her head
"It's just that she thinks that you might have... you know and wants to check if it's true with a true diagnosis"
"Might have have what?" There's no easy way to say this! I only sigh and finally blurt out:
"Postpartum depression"