Hi!
well, i noticed this story isn't getting many reads but i understands. It's kind of boring, Depressed, getting saved. It happens in lots and lots of stories so i understand.
But i'm not going to stop writing it, this story has a strong meaning for me..a personal meaning and i really love to write it :) it might not be good but it's the way i like it and if you want me to change something then just ask and i'll see what i can do :)
thank you for voting, reading, commenting
it means more than you think! xx
Enjoy this chappiee!
<3
PS:the song on the side is the song Harry is singing to Louis in the car :D xx i just adore this song!
Chapter 2
‘I didn’t notice, I didn’t see…I made a mistake, I blame it on me…’
-Harry-
I was copying the things Mr Steward wrote on the board when I noticed Louis wasn’t doing the same. I stopped writing and looked up to see him staring out of the window. It was kind of creepy, it looked like he was totally out of this world with his mind. I gently poked his arm but he didn’t react. ‘Lou?’ I whispered poking his side. He finally blinked and sighted. He turned around, his eyes still looked the same, they were still gone. ‘what.’ He said back, not even caring about whispering. I glanced around the room to see if anyone heard but it was only Niall who gave us a weird look.
‘uhm…you might want to write this part down, it’s kind of really difficult. Even Sammy doesn’t get it all.’ I tried to explain. He just nodded and gave me a smile before he turned back around and stared out of the window again. He didn’t even touched his pen. I frowned and made a mental note to ask him what was wrong and to copy my book for him.
I was still writing when I suddenly heard Mr Steward yell something. I looked up and noticed he was staring at us. ‘Mr Tomlinson!’ he yelled, clearly getting frustrated. I looked at Louis and the guy seriously didn’t notice a single thing that was happening around him. Mr Steward yelled again before he stepped towards us. I pinched Louis carefully In his shoulder, he blinked again but it was too late. Mr Steward already reached our desk. ‘care to explain?!’ he yelled looking angrily at Louis who just frowned at the teacher. ‘what?’ he asked with a small kind of feared voice. Mr Steward took a deep breath to calm himself down before he hissed ‘Detention’ to Louis.
The teacher walked back to the board and started to write. ‘what the hell did I do?’ Louis whispered to me. ‘Lou, what’s wrong? You didn’t pay attention, the guys was yelling at you for like 5 minutes but you kept staring at nothing.’ I whispered back. Louis just huffed and crossed his arms in front of his chest. ‘nothing’s wrong, I’m just tired.’ He said and with that our conversation for the next hour was over.
Finally the bell rang, singing it was time for lunch. I stood up and grabbed my books and again Louis was busy staring out of the window. I sighted deeply. The boys came over to us and glanced at Louis. ‘what’s wrong with him today?’ Liam asked worried. I shrugged and walked over towards Louis and place both of my hands on his shoulder. He jumped a little and immediately stood up. I frowned, what did I do? Without saying a word he grabbed his books and rushed out of the class. ‘he’s on his period.’ Zayn said with a serious expression on his face. We all rolled our eyes at him but he didn’t even notice. ‘wait a second boys, I would like to ask something.’ Mr Steward yelled before we reached the door.
We turned around and walked back to his desk. ‘I noticed Mr To-Louis was a bit off this lesson. Is there something wrong?’ he asked sounding more like a worried dad than a teacher. ‘we have no idea sir, I’m sorry.’ I meant it, I was sorry. He nodded. ‘well, tell him he won’t have to come to detention for this time. But he can’t do it again.’ I smiled thankfully at him and we all left waving at him. we walked silently to our cafeteria. We sat down on our regular table, still without saying a word. Niall was munching on his sandwich while Zayn was biting his lip. Liam just frowned and looked like he was thinking deeply. I was just staring at the door, hoping Louis would walk in any minute.
After about ten minutes he finally came inside, smiling…smiling? He sat down and said hello to all of us before he started to eat his lunch. ‘guys, please stop staring.’ He said winking. I shook my head and decided to just ignore what happened the first hours of the day. Maybe Zayn was right, maybe h was on his period. I chuckled. Yeah sure Harry, like that is possible. ‘Mr Steward said you don’t have to go to detention anymore as long as it won’t happen again.’ Liam said smiling a bit at Louis. ‘won’t happen again? What happened?’ Louis looked seriously confused. ‘you didn’t pay attention to his class, you were kind of completely out of this world.’ I explained when the others all nodded.’ow…okay. Well, it won’t happen again!’ he smiled and pecked my cheek before he stood up to throw his garbage in the bin. ‘you’re blushing! He’s blushing! Harry you’re blu-‘ ‘Shut it Niall. I’m not blu-‘ ‘You are blushing.’ Me and Niall kept arguing but I stopped when Louis sat back down, I wish Niall had done the same. ‘Louis…Harry blushed.’ He smiled and winked at me.
‘ow now did you Harold? What made you blush?’ he smirked. I groaned and looked down at my salad. Why do they always have to embarrass me like that? Seriously, I do not find in funny at all. ‘aw babe, don’t worry. I find it very cute, it suits you.’ he winked and started to drink his apple-juice. ‘hey, you guys want to hang out tonight?’ Liam suddenly asked and we all nodded except for Louis. Nobody noticed though. ‘we could go to mine, my parents aren’t home anyways.’ He added. I looked at Louis who looked like he was in a mental battle with himself. Suddenly he spoke up. ‘I can’t come, i-im babysitting tonight. My mum isn’t home so…’ ‘okay, another day then?’ ‘oh no! do it without me, it’s no problem really.’ He smiled and Liam nodded. ‘okay, if you’re sure.’ Louis nodded and Liam started to plan the evening but I ignored it. ‘you want me to babysit with you?’ I asked Louis who looked up and frowned. ‘oh no, It’s fine. You can go and have fun with Liam and the rest.’ He smiled but it didn’t reach his eyes.
‘nah, I’m coming over. I want to be with you Lou.’ I smiled and he smiled back, this time it did reach his eyes. The twinkle that I loved so much was back. I swear I would kill someone to see that twinkle. ‘okay, if you insist.’ I nodded and told Liam I would help Louis and he said it was no problem and I earned a wink from Niall. What the fuck? The bell rang again, this time as a signal the break was over. With lots of sighs and moans we walked to our next class which was with Mr Cooper. ‘yay, now you can stare at your cute teacher.’ Louis joked and I smacked his head. ‘shut it Tomlinson.’ He smiled and skipped to the classroom. ‘you see, he’s on his period I swear!’ Zayn said as soon as Louis was far enough away from us so he wouldn’t hear us. ‘Zayn stop it. Maybe he was just a bit tired and it changed?’ I suggested.
‘I don’t know Harry. Maybe you can find out what is wrong tonight?’ Liam asked and I just nodded. We all shared a look when we saw Louis jumping a bit when someone brushed past him. ‘yeah..will do.’ I mumbled.
-Louis-
Fresh cuts covered my arms when I walked in the cafeteria. I just needed it, I couldn’t contain it. I felt so bad, so useless, so worthless. With my friends, yes I call them my friends because they’re the only ones who’re always there for me when I need them. They take the pain away, they make me feel alive. So what I was saying. With my friends always in my bag I can survive the day. The craving to feel the metal on my skin became unbearable and when the bell rang I rushed to the bathroom and they helped me like they always do.
I immediately had the power to fake a smile again. I knew the boys were getting suspicious, especially Harry. I can’t let him know, he can’t see, he can’t find out. I can’t lose him and as long as I hide, he won’t know and he won’t go. When Harry decided to go with me to help me babysit I was and relieved and scared. When I was home I could do anything I wanted to do without anyone knowing. I wouldn’t have to be afraid someone would find out, I would just lock myself in the bathroom and nobody would notice. I was relieved he wanted to come so I didn’t have to be alone. It was almost like he wanted to do it but I knew he just felt bad for me and he found me pathetic.
The rest of the day went by pretty quickly but the time stopped when I could feel my skin stinging and burning. It was itchy an I wanted to scratch but I couldn’t. I kept glancing at the clock hoping time will go by faster but it didn’t work. I tapped my foot on the ground nervously. ‘Louis, will you please stop that. You’re disturbing the whole class.’ Mr Cooper said clearly annoyed. I nodded and looked back down at my book. I grabbed my pen and started to tap with it against my desk. Harry, who was sitting next to me sighted and took my pen away from me. I wanted to protest but when I looked up I saw Mr Cooper glaring at me. I probably annoyed Harry. Maybe that’s why nobody really likes me, because I’m an annoying, fat, disgusting, worthless piece of shit? Yeah, that’s probably it.
Finally the bell rang, I jumped up almost taking the table with me. I grabbed my books and ran out of the room, feeling familiar eyes on me but I kept running. I almost ran past my locker but I turned back in time and put everything back. I knew Harry drove me to school but I just decided to walk the way home. Or run, running probably is better. I will be home sooner and I will burn some calories. ‘Louis! Wait!’ I heard Harry’s footsteps coming closer. Think Louis. Run or wait. Wait or run. I decided to run but I guess I was thinking for too long. Just when I was about to take the first steps, Harry’s hand was tightly around my wrist. It hurt like hell, I wanted to cry and yell that he had to let go but I couldn’t. the stinging became almost unbearable and I could feel the tears burning in my eyes. I turned around and Harry looked at me in shock before he let go. I wanted to thank him but again I couldn’t. ‘boo, please. What’s wrong?’ he asked but I just shook my head. He sighted and instead of walking away, which I thought he would do, he wrapped his arms around my waist (which also hurt but less than my wrists) and pulled me close to his chest.
I loved the heat of his body against my cold skin and melted in his touch. I buried my head in the crook of his neck where I always felt safe. ‘it’s okay babe.’ He whispered. ‘I’m sorry.’ I said and pulled back but Harry didn’t let me go. ‘for what? You didn’t do anything.’ Uhm, yes I did. I humiliated you in front of the whole school. You had to hug me, which probably was the worst thing you ever had to do. You had to smell me, so you probably had to hold your breath the whole time. I didn’t say that though, I just smiled. He frowned but grabbed my head, intertwining our fingers slightly when we walked out of the building. We got some strange looks, I’m certain it was because they were wondering why the hell Harry was walking with me.
We climbed inside the car and drove to my place. Harry turned on the radio when I didn’t talk. I looked at him and he was looking back. He smiled on of his magical dimple smiles and I couldn’t held myself from smiling back. He’s the only one who can do that, making me smile a real smile. Only Harry could make me happy. Suddenly Lionel Richie’s song ‘Hello’ came on. I closed my eyes and let my head rest against the window when suddenly Harry tapped my shoulder. I looked up to see him staring deeply in my eyes. I immediately felt how my cheeks turned into a deep shape of red when he started to sing along without looking away from me.
Hello, is it me you're looking for?
I can see it in your eyes
I can see it in your smile
You're all I've ever wanted, (and) my arms are open wide
'Cause you know just what to say
And you know just what to do
And I want to tell you so much, I love you ...
He took a second to look back at the road before he turned around and started to sing again.
I long to see the sunlight in your hair
And tell you time and time again how much I care
Sometimes I feel my heart will overflow
Hello, I've just got to let you know
'Cause I wonder where you are
And I wonder what you do
Are you somewhere feeling lonely, or is someone loving you?
Tell me how to win your heart
For I haven't got a clue
But let me start by saying, I love you ...
My heart melted when the song was finished. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it tightly. ‘I’m here for you boo, I care about you. I love you.’ he smiled and pecked my cheek before he turned his head back to the road. My hand still in his. God, I wish he just meant it…