AWAKENED HEART (The first he...

By unilover85

15K 1.3K 453

Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo met years before their first drama together "THE UNTAMED" They had met on Daytoy year... More

INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER 1
CHAPTER 2
CHAPTER 3
CHAPTER 4
CHAPTER 5
CHAPTER 6
CHAPTER 7
CHAPTER 8
CHAPTER 9
CHAPTER 10
CHAPTER 11
CHAPTER 12
CHAPTER 13
CHAPTER 14
CHAPTER 15
CHAPTER 16
CHAPTER 17
CHAPTER 18
CHAPTER 19
CHAPTER 20
CHAPTER 21
πŸ”žπŸ”žCHAPTER 22 πŸ”žπŸ”ž
CHAPTER 23
CHAPTER 24
CHAPTER 25
πŸ”žCHAPTER 26
CHAPTER 27
CHAPTER 28
CHAPTER 29
CHAPTER 30
CHAPTER 31
CHAPTER 32
CHAPTER 33
CHAPTER 34
CHAPTER 35
CHAPTER 36
CHAPTER 37
CHAPTER 38
CHAPTER 39
CHAPTER 40
CHAPTER 41
CHAPTER 42β™₯️
CHAPTER 43
CHAPTER 44 πŸ”ž
CHAPTER 45πŸ”ž
CHAPTER 46πŸ”ž
CHAPTER 47πŸ”ž
CHAPTER 48
Announcement ❣️❣️
CHAPTER 48
CHAPTER 49
CHAPTER 50
CHAPTER 51πŸ”ž
CHAPTER 53
CHAPTER 54 the
HAPPY NEW YEAR ❗
CHAPTER 55
CHAPTER 56
CHAPTER 57
ANNOUNCEMENT‼️
CHAPTER 58

CHAPTER 52

154 18 9
By unilover85

A few days passed since Yibo and Zhan had told the news about Zhan being pregnant. The atmosphere in the mansion had changed to a cheerful one, the  bodyguard as well as aunty, had started treating Zhan like he was a glass. Him being a person raised to be able to take care of himself found it too much to bear, but the only person he could be honest to about it was Yibo. Yibo was treating him pretty much the same since he understood Zhan very well, he had to make sure he doesn't baby him, he wanted to buy he knew he couldn't if he still wanted to keep the peace between them.

It was later in the afternoon when Zhan was in Yibo's office downstairs when an email came through. It was from Mr Wei and he wanted to talk to Zhan about the drama he had chosen for him since the one Zhan was supposed to work on was cancelled due to some issues. Zhan read the email and sent his reply before he sent his mother and text and also sent Yichen a text as well
He had since wanted to clear this up with him and he thought a good time to do that was before his pregnancy showed. He didn't want people to find out about it since he felt embarrassed and also felt like a creep for being a pregnant man.

He was supposed to see Mr Wei the filling day in the morning, which meant he would go home to meet Yichen and as well as tell his parents the news.  He braced himself for his father's reaction, which he knew was not going to be a good one since he looked disgusted the last time he learned that he had a miscarriage. One thing for sure was that he had to tell them and it didn't matter how his father was going to take it, he took comfort in knowing that his mother was going to support him and Yibo. He knew she would be happy to hear the news, which parent wouldn't be happy to know that they're going to be a grandparent..?.

He finished the Yamaha design for Yibo's motorcycle leather suit, anf he made it to look similar to the helmet he personally designed for Yibo's birthday. After sending it, he got a reply within minutes and supervisors seems to be pretty impressed with it. Yibo was supposed to go for a race in a few months and he had to start practicing to get the feel of the race track he was to participate in. Mr Wei knew about it and didn't miss a single race everytime Yibo was to participate. I mean Yibo was racing for his country and it was every citizen's responsibility to make sure he is well rested for the race.r Wei was looking forward to the race, as well and Mr Xiao who had already written the date as a reminder on his phone.

Later that evening, Yibo came back and they had dinner together with the bodyguards until aunty came in right as they were about done and asked to speak to Yibo in private. That privacy made Zhan anxious since he thought that aunty wanted to talk to Yibo about retiring, which she had been talking about for quite some time. Zhan knew about it and knowing that there was no one was there to live with her when she went home was trully something Zhan asked her to think about. Her mother before her was working as a laundry maid, all she did was to wash laundry.

When she started getting sick, her mother asked her three sisters to take over the job so that they could continue to support the family. But they refused and aunty being the youngest, she took it and did her best with it. She sent everything she was paid home every time she would use products Yibo's grandmother had bought her and didn't need to spend more money when her mother needed medication and her lazy sisters needed food. When she was introduced Yibo as he was very young, she loved him just right there and then. So when she was given an opportunity to go back home by Yibo's grandparents, she refused and said that she will stay behind because Yibo needed her. She was right no one would make Yibo do anything except for her.

Aunty and Yibo's private talk lasted for almost thirty minutes and Zhan who was pacing up and down, bitting his fingernails as he kept throwing glances at the two who seemed to be talking about something very serious. He waited till they bid their good nights as she turned and went to her room outside. Zhan ran towards Yibo to ask him what she said, but still, Yibo didn't reply. Whatever it was, seemed to be putting Yibo under a lot of pressure as he walked toward everyone with his hands in his pockets.

They reached the room and Zhan was still asking, even when they laid on the bed, Yibo's mood didn't seem to shake off. When Zhan looked at him, he saw that he wouldn't be able to do their everyday activities, no matter how much he yearned for Yibo, he knew he wouldn't feel like doing it. So...Zhan laid down and turned his back on Yibo who was then laying on his back, seemed to still be in thoughts about what aunty has said. He quickly glanced at Zhan and saw him sleeping facing the other way, and he felt guilty.

He had told himself to never go to sleep without making sure that Zhan was alright. Especially then that he was pregnant, he made it his everyday and every night mission to check on him. But when he touched Zhan's hand, he felt him wince, like he was startled by his touch or that maybe he didn't want to be touched by him. He couldn't understand what it was but he made sure to find out what it was that was going on with him. She he fully turned Zhan around, he realised that he was whimpering, even his breadth was uneven.

He quickly felt his forehead as he kept calling his name and Zhan couldn't answer. He thought it was because he was sick but when he felt his forehead, he felt that he was warm and not hot. So he decided to ask him since he was in the verge of loosing it and calling Jake to come to the mansion.

"Zhan gē, what's wrong..? Are you not feeling well..?"

"I'm fine...I just need some sleep and I'll be fine."

"No Zhan gē, you need to tell me so you can see the doctor before setting happens to the baby. Please...tell me what's going in with you, or are you maybe hurt..?"

"No I'm not. I said I'm fine, I just need some sleep."

"How can I let you sleep when you're like this. If you dot wanna tell me then fine, I'm calling Jake.!"

Yibo has already took his phone on the nightstand and was about to dial, his actions were done in lightning speed and by the time he held his phone on his ear, was when Zhan snatched it from him. He seemed irritated as he gave his reasons, I mean . It was understandable.

"Yibo I'm not sick, I'm just need to be touched.!"

"What..?? I did try to touch you but you didn't want me to."

"That's because that's not the way I want to be touched."

"What do you mean..? I thought you liked my touches ".

"I do, but right now I need more than your touches, I need you and by you I mean... you..!"

Zhan was whisper shouting as he explained how he felt and Yibo couldn't help but feel like he was ontop of the world. He liked it when Zhan showed his vulnerable side to him, especially when he wanted him the way he did. He just loved him, and it was at times like that that he saw Zhan being cute and all. He smiled and pulled him closer, without saying a single word to him, he captured his lips and kissed him hungrily. His hands were all over Zhan as and Zhan's were trying so hard to grab onto Yibo's shirt for balance as he felt like he was about to fall.

He was kissed so abruptly that he didn't have time to adjust his posture or even his breathing, at that time, he felt like the air inside his lungs was being sucked out. The kiss felt rushed one person while for the other it felt rough and ready, and it was when Yibo felt he couldn't breath that he realised that he had been kissing Zhan for a long time. He parted from the kiss and Zhan was a mess, saliva was drooling on the side of his lips and Yibo couldn't help it but licked it off. Zhan's vision was jazzy from the kiss and his mind was in jumbles as he felt weak.

Yibo didn't want to hasitate any longer as he turned Zhan and made his back face him, he pulled his pants down to his knees and put his two fingers inside Zhan's mouth to lubricate them. When he felt it they were wet enough, he pulled them out and inserted them both at the same time in Zhan's hole. Zhan moaned as he felt full from those two fingers, them Yibo started kissing his neck from behind him while the other hand which was supporting  Zhan's neck bent to pinch his nipple while bitting and sucking his neck at the same time.

Zhan's moans started to become constant and that's when Yibo knew he had found his sweet spot. He pulled down his own pants just down to his thighs and stroked his member couple of times. At that time, Zhan's  was pushing his butt backwards, ready to receive his Yibo's huge member in his tight hole. He knew it would hurt but then after a minute or so, he would feel all the pleasures meant for him. Yibo's breath became hot on Zhan's neck, giving Zhan an added feeling that he moaned a complaints.

Yibo smirked and aligned his member with his hole, then he slowly put it in as Zhan grabbed into the sheets, feeling like his hole was about to tear open while Yibo buried his face deeper in Zhan's neck. He couldn't help himself from the feeling he felt everytime he slept with Zhan. No matter how many times they did it, he still felt as tight as he felt the first time they did it in Guizhou. He still felt like that innocent Zhan who he broke his virginity and it was then that he held Zhan by his waist and thrusted deeper and gently that all Zhan could do was to moan Yibo's name as he cried from the uncontrollable pleasure he felt.

Half an hour later they both released as Zhan had a big smile in his face. He had never felt the way he felt before, he felt good all the time before, during and after  him and Yibo made love, but it was always a different kind of good, just like at that exact time. Yibo didn't rush to pull out, and even if he wanted to, he couldn't since Zhan had clamped on him, preventing him from pulling out. They stayed in that position and when Yibo called out Zhan and asked him to release him, Zhan didn't answer. He kissed him neck and bit it to leave a little hickey, that was what he always did when Zhan had clamped at him and he wanted to be released.

Zhan would always release him but at that time he didn't. He realised that Zhan had already fallen asleep, so, and when he peeked at his face, he saw that indeed he was asleep, but he had slept with a beautiful smile on his face. Yibo felt content from seeing that, he slowly pulled out and when he did, loads of cum leaked out of Zhan's hole and stained the sheets. Knowing how Zhan was such a neat freak, he pulled off his pants and as well as his shirt before and pulled up his before he climbed off the bed and went to the bathroom to prepare Zhan's bath. Two hours later the sheet had been changed and Zhan was sleeping in Yibo's arms while Yibo fell asleep while sniffing Zhan's hair.

A couple of days later Zhan reminded Yibo about going to see his parents as well as Yichen. It was later in the evening right after dinner when Zhan spoke to Baba about it that reminded Yibo about Zhan going home. They had not fully talked about it and he didn't know for how long Zhan would be gone, he didn't know because when Zhan mentioned it he didn't want to know and he even showed how he wasn't interested in hearing it. But now that it was time already, he felt like he was cheated of time. Zhan was to go home alone and  he would call when he needed Baba to come pick him up. That was how Zhan wanted things to be, but Baba knew it would never work like that considering the way his boss looked right as he Zhan was speaking.

Minutes later, they all went to their bedrooms and Zhan was the first to go upstairs when Yibo remained downstairs to speak to his men. That was known to be like that unless if he had already spoken to them before dinner. They were all sitting in the lining area when Yibo started talking.

"Gē, how is the building coming along..?"

"It's finished, we're waiting for all the equipments to be delivered next week. But the entire place is finished down to the garden and the private room which is already furnished. The cleaning was done today and it's perfect from the what I saw on the pictures."

"Okay that's good, and Lar gē, what about the designs,did you come up with an agreement on which one to use yet..?"

"Yes boss, it's being printed and will be done by next week. But there's another thing that's been bothering me. One of the sales girls posted an edited intimate picture of you and her together, now the store has been flooding with paparazzi disguised as buyers just to see you with her. The things is that it disrupts sales as it's always full from people who don't buy anything and those who want to buy don't get the chance to even look for what they could buy because it's always full. I have tried to speak to the supervisor and he told her to out the photo down, but it's bit working, the problem still persists."

"Okay, ten post about it that the file has been fired for what she has done. That business isy baby, I like it more than acting cause it really brings people together, but if my hard work and your dedication is being flushed Luke that then I'm not gonna be nice about it."

"So boss, should I just post that she had been fired for what she posted or do you want me to add something else to the story.? I mean..people are going to come to the shop and see her there, besides, even if I say she was fired, 8t still doesn't clear your name."

"You must prove that the photo was edited and show them the originals. The rest you can think of what to do, but as for her, I want her fired asap.!"

"Yes boss!!"

"Ba gē , about what Zhan gē said–"

"I know there's no way you're going to let that happen, so I just agreed to everything he said. "

"Thank you, I don't want to take chances with two lives, if that man finds out Zhan gē is pregnant then what do you think he would do..? I can't loose sight of what's important to me. Zhan gē is my life and I would die if anything happens to him and my baby. So from now on, we need to be extra alert at all times and check if you're not being followed. We must protect this home and everyone in it as well, so make sure that no paparazzi is lurking nearby and think of strategies for those two cars who are always following me from work. Lar gē, find out who they are and let's find a way to get rid of them."

"Yes boss!.." (×3)

"The new teachers at the orphanages are thought be doing a good job, the principal had even asked if it was possible to arrange their stay in the orphanage. He said it doesn't look safe for them to travel that distance everyday and she feared it could even affect the children."

"She's right, we still haven't found any evidence of traffickers so we cannot take any chances yet. Ba gē, do you think Alex might continue his uncle's business while his uncle is in prison..?"

"I...I..he...(sigh) I don't think he would."

"Why..? Do you trust him in that..?"

It was them that Baba looked at Larry to see any type of reaction from him that would make him think he was angry for talking about Alex like that. Larry was looking at the glass of wine in his hands, maybe trying to avoid hearing Baba's responses of his enemy in love. But at that time, Baba thought it would be disrespectful to not answer Yibo, he had learned from being a spy how personal and business matters should be separated. So when he continued, he didn't spare a glance at Larry again, he answered truthfully from what he had analysed when spending time with Alex.

"Alex was forced into doing those things and when his uncle was arrested, he had already started taking over his father's logistic business. I think he's running a legit business right now. I had someone keep an eye on him when I felt and told him to call me when he sees anything strange, he hasn't called . That means nothing much has been happening apart from him trying cut the criminal link that business had with his father's."

"Okay, but we still need to tighten the security around those orphanages, even if it's not that man, I don't want anything bad happening to those kids. Maybe they should use key cards, and anyone who isn't in our isn't in our database must not be allowed in. I can take care of my kids, so I don't need anyone coming in in pretense of sponsorship to take advantage of anyone there."

"Yes, you're right Yibo, I will make the arrangements right away."

"So boss..about Zhan...he's leaving tomorrow...what should I do..?"

"I will let you know in the morning before I leave for work. You know how stubborn Zhan gē is and right now he's even worse cause he's so sensitive. I need to discuss this with him even though I know we're probably gonna fight (sigh) good night. We'll discuss anything further next week cause I'll be on leave."

Yibo went upstairs and from every stair he stepped on, he kept on sighing like he was carrying something heavy in his shoulders. When he reached the bedroom, he took a deep breath before opening the door and went in. Zhan was on his phone talking to his mother, by the sound of things and Yibo went to the bathroom as he tried to not disturb their conversation. When he came back, Zhan had put the phone away and waiting for him with a big grin on his face. Yibo had brought the mixture of fruit juice that aunty always made for Zhan and left it in the table by the door. So he went and  took it before giving it to Zhan to drink, which he did.

Yibo sat down and waited for him to finish before he started.

"Zhan gē, about you going home alone tomorrow..I don't think that's a good idea. You should at least take Ba gē with you for safety."

"Yibo, are you insinuating that I'm incapable of taking care of myself..?"

"That's not what I mean and you know it. How can I let you go all by your self when you even want to drive yourself tomorrow. When last did you drive a car that you're now so confident that you'll be able to do it on your own with a lot of craziness in the streets."

"I don't care, I have a license and that means I am allowed to drive in the streets regardless of the conditions. Yibo..it doesn't matter what you say, cause I will go alone tomorrow."

"And what if that friend of yours tries something with you...what then..huh..?"

"That's why I'm meeting him at home, I was talking to mom and she thinks it's a good idea cause she'll be there. He won't try anything with my parents being there."

"Okay...but Ba gē will drive you there. "

"Yibo..when you're being like this now, how will you cope for the whole weekend when I'm not here..? You need to stop being so overl–"

"You said what..? The while weekend..? That is not gonna work. I can't let you go for that long, what am I supposed to do when you're not here..?"

"Do what you've been doing before you met me."

"You mean I should go clubbing..?"

"What..is that all you've been doing before we met..?"

"Does it really matter..?"

"Of course it does, look.. you can do anything except for clubbing.!"

"You mean I should go skating...? Zhan gē, when I'm home...you're my favourite thing around and now that you want to leave me here...what should I do then.?"

"You get some work done then, and don't you dare go skating. You want to go skate at that park where that girl works right..? What were you doing there in the first place...? That shop is full of booby girls, so what were you looking for..? Huh..?"

"Come on Zhan gē, those girls bring in good sales, you won't understand. Besides...that photo is fake."

"Good sales...good sales you say...and you're one of them since you're one of those who buy looking at their boobs. How pathetic of you, just know that if I ever find out that you're seeing that girl, I will make sure you never use anything in your body on her."

"What...Zhan gē, I go there sometimes and I have to if I want to keep my business. Besides...that matter is being cleared and that photo is old, I think about two weeks ago when I went there."

"Why didn't you just order the skate board other than going there in person..?"

"Zhan gē, I own that business, so how could I not go there...? Besides...those girls weren't hired by me. I left the hiring and other stuff for Lar gē to manage since yes the manager. Now can we stop talking about boobs and talk about tomorrow..?"

"Okay...I'm sorry..I didn't know that store was yours. I thought...I thought she was one of your exes and that's why you went there."

"What..? Even if she was my ex, why would I want to go there to see her..? You're mine now, so why would I want to see anyone else..? Zhan gē...what are you getting at..? Do you still not trust me..?"

" I'm sorry Yibo, I just can't help it. Many things keep disturbing my mind these days. I ...keep...I'm sorry."

"It's fine, so about tomorrow..?"

"Okay...I'll ask Ba gē to drive me, but I'm going for the whole weekend. But I can spend a day and come back the next day if you let me go alone. So..it's up to you...are you taking three days and two nights or a day and a night...?"

"Urg...fine.! You can drive tomorrow."

Them just like that, the conversation ended. The next morning they woke up at the same time and took a shower together. Zhan was supposed to go home early since he had promised his mom to buy him some stuff on his way for a hot pot that Zhan had been craving for so long. Yibo was the first to leave after he had successfully succeeded in planting kisses all over Zhan's face that he even earned a cute giggle from Zhan, making his heart content for the day. It was an hour later when Zhan went down stairs after making sure he packed everthig he needed for his night trip home.

He went downstairs and there he found Baba with the car keys in his hand, as he has just parked the car up front. He had took one of Yibo's grandfather's classic cars from the back garage for Zhan to drive in disguise as per his bosses orders. Yibo didn't like driving those cars because they brought him memories of his grandparents which always made his heart ache to the fact that they were gone. Zhan was the first to drive one of them since their passing, and he was very exited to try it since his father once owned one just like that back when he was little.

Baba had washed it and it was looking brand new, he went to the back and Zhan went to take his justice form aunty and bid her goodbye before he left. Outside, Zhan stood a few feet away from the car, admiring it as he walked all around it with the keys in his hands. He pressed the unlock button and the doors unlocked, it was when he walked over and grabbed the handle that he felt a hand grab his shoulder. He stood there stunned for a few seconds before he decided to turn around to see who it was.

There was a middle aged woman wearing very fancy and expensive clothes right infornt of him. To Zhan, she looked to be Sharon's age and Zhan's mind raced with questions and wonder as fear grabbed hold of his heart. He took a deep breath and looked at her straight in the eyes, but he didn't say anything to her. He waited for her to speak since she was in her space, he remembered how Yibo had told him that none of his ex knew about the mansion and that he was the first one to step foot in it. The lady folded her arms seeing Zhan's reactions, she stared back at Zhan and she also didn't say anything.

Zhan saw how she was taking her time while he didn't have time to waste since he had to go to the grocery store before heading home. So he took out his phone and dialled some numbers and before he put the phone in his ear for a few seconds and when it started to ring he removed it firm his ear and held it in his hand. He thought he should start talkog since he didn't have time to waste in Yibo's exes, he was getting late.

"Excuse me, how may I help you..?"

"I should be the one asking you that, what are you doing here..? And why are you driving Yibo's car..?"

"I'm here for Yibo and he's the one who let me use it instead of my own. So how may I help you.?"

"Where's Yibo..?"

"He's already gone to work, I'm about to go out as well, so if you'll please excuse me.."

"So where that girl...? The one that's dating Yibo..? I saw the news last night and I want him here to explain to me how careless he could be. Now here you are, aren't you that guy he was with in that drama...? So why are you here then...? I thought you had long finished your work together, so why are you still sticking around for.?"

"Look...I don't care if you talk to me that way but please doe a favour, stop sounding as if Yibo is irresponsible. I will not tolerate that.! So please..if there's nothing else, I would like to ask you to leave now. I will make sure to call Yibo and give him your message if you have one. As you can see... I really need to go right now.!"

The tension between the two was felt and if there was someone listening, they would be gulping because of how intense it was around the two people. Zhan about to get inside the car and leave since he knew Baba and Larry were there and would take care of here while he's gone. He knew she would never enter the house, so leaving her there was not an issue. The issue was the lady who grabbed Zhan by the arm and pulled him out of the car just as he was about to enter and threw him back. Zhan staggered a few steps and lost his balance which made him loose his balance and he fell to the pavement in the driveway.

Zhan winced as his hands were scraped by the hard pavement, as he tried to prevent his injuries to the stomach by his hands. The lady smirked, folded her arms and looked at Zhan who was by then on the ground holding his stomach with one hand while trying to stand with the other. He had fallen hard in his butt which made his stomach churn a little and he felt like he was about to vomit as he quickly stood up and rushed to the bushes nreaby and threw up. He looked around for the tumbler which contained the juice aunty had made for him and he saw it besides the car.

He wiped his mouth and with hisnwek body he slowly walked toward the car to pick it up. But because the key was very next to the tumbler, the lady mistakened Zhan for trying to reach for the car keys and she didn't see what Zhan was reaching for. In that heat of the moment, she grabbed Zhan's hand where he was injured by the pavement and pressed on it, rubbing the sand in the wounds deeper into his skin. Zhan screamed as he felt the sand go into his broken skin, the lady saw a little blood on her sky blue jacket and quickly pushed him back and he fell on his butt again.

She  walked closer to Zhan and bent down a little and the anger in her face and voice was very evident. Zhan couldn't look at her as he felt pain in his stomach to a point where he felt like he was going out if breath. He was panting as he tried to grasp for air, but he couldn't. Something between his eyes caught his eye and when he looked, he saw that it was blood. Tears started to flow out of his eyes and he thought about it happening again. He had said it that if he was to loose the baby, Yibo would never forgive him, and it was happening. He cried for his love for Yibo which he will loose, he cried for his baby who he had never gotten a chance to meet his grandparents and meet the world. But lastly...he cried for being such a bad person that even when he was chosen to carry a baby, he was able to loose two babies such a short period of a year.

"Just because you had a role with Yibo, it doesn't make you worthy of him. Just take your scrap car and leave this place this instant. !!"

She had not seen the blood on Zhan's pants and when she said that, Zhan had already been holding on his last thread of consciousness before he passed out. After Zhan had passed out, she felt scared, very scared. She had underestimated Zhan's injuries to the scrapes on his hands and she didn't think that wouod be such a big deal, considering that Zhan was a man. Those scrapes meant nothing...right...?


Hey guys sorry for the late update, miss your funny and tensed  comments. So I hope you enjoy this update.

Stay blessed 💞💞
Stay safe 🤗🤗
And remember...
♥️❤️I love you a Galaxy ♥️♥️

Continue Reading

You'll Also Like

67.2K 1.3K 22
Liberation: Freedom from suffering and dissatisfaction through the uprooting of greed, hatred, and delusion. - When an old childhood friend comes bac...
117K 6.9K 41
A rarity in the cultivation world; Wei Wuxian's life changed the day his secondary gender was known. A male omega. His dreams of becoming his brother...
2.4K 404 44
Betrayed by your closest people all for wealth and power. would you be able to trust again let alone love? what if you were offered revenge by a com...
17.5K 1.3K 31
After confessing his long-term feelings towards his best friend, Wang Yibo, Xiao Zhan temporarily runs away to Tokyo with a broken heart in his lugga...