Kongpob glances at the things he is carrying before looking up at the door of his bedroom. He takes a deep breath, readying himself to deal with whatever his ex employer is planning to throw his way. He raps against the hard wood twice, alerting the other just in case before giving a slight push to the door, stepping inside.
"Mom has sent these....for you...."
Kongpob trails off, finding the actor standing over the window, exactly the same place he was earlier. Gazing at the sky, back turned towards Kongpob, his left palm flat against the glass window shield, other fisting the divorce papers he had hidden.
"What do you think you are doing??", Kongpob marches towards the elder, snatching away the papers, making Arthit straighten and face him.
The actor tilted his head to the side, giving a lazy once over to the human frame before settling over the furious face.
"You seem angry," Arthit stated, left corner of his mouth perking up in a smirk," Why though?"
...jerk...Kongpob gritted his teeth, shoving the items to another's chest," Mom gave this to you and... I. am. not. angry.".
Now that his emotions are in check and he is no longer feeling like bursting into tears, he can think and act rationally. He is so not liking the smug I know it all smile flashing over the pink lips of the actor... how dare he come here after firing me without any notice??...
Arthit has almost not caught the clothes thrown his way if not for his quick reflex. He thumbs the dark, soft fabric, which looks brand new. However, there's no mistaking that the design and pattern. It's the same his mentor would prefer to wear. The left side of his chest pangs at the remembrance, realising that it must have belonged to Kongpob's late father. Mr. Suthilak has been a great mentor to him. He has always treated Arthit kindly and never made him feel like a pet project. In fact, it was him who bailed out Arthit after he was arrested for stealing confidential information. That man who was decades senior to him, came up to him and apologized, pleaded forgiveness from Arthit's parents. It was another reason the actor was not able to refuse when his mentor asked for a promise during his final moments, lying on his death bed.
"Also, stop snooping around my things. It's not your house, "Kongpob's firm declaration brought Arthit out of memories. Fisting the fabric against his chest, he lifts his head, facing the younger one standing with crossed arms... What a two-faced moron!!!...
"But your mother thinks otherwise. Ain't she?"Arthit mocked. "She said," Arthit made universal quoting sign, "it's your own house. Feel free to use everything".
"You!!!", Kongpob points his index at the actor, ready to lash out. However, stops thinking otherwise. Letting out an exasperated sigh, he nears his senior, standing toe to toe.
Glaring right into the amber orbs, he speaks, minding to keep his voice low," Look. I don't know what you are here for. But let me make one thing crystal clear..."He raises the divorce papers, waving in air, "...I am not signing off these papers. "
"Why?", Arthit asked, regretting instantly. He shouldn't care but old habits die hard, or may be he is still holding on to the thread of hope, that whatever the younger one said and did years ago must have had a reason for it. That his precious young master had not deliberately destroyed him. May be...he is yet waiting for a reason, which will finally snap the connecting threadbare yarn, cutting and digging into Arthit's flesh, making him bleed, each waking second.
Kongpob remains silent, his face passive giving away nothing. Breaking eye contact, he stares at the side wall, completely disregrading the other person's question.
" There's a new toothbrush and washed towels in the upper cabinet inside the bathroom. You can use it. " Turning, he starts for the door, intending to stay in the guest room for the night.
"Should I make a guess?"
Arthit's voice halts Kongpob in his strides. Rounding back, he faces the actor, whose eyes are already aimed at him.
"What?"
This time, the actor approaches the younger one. His lips curled in a sardonic smile, not reaching the hazel orbs. "Should I guess...why you don't want to sign the papers?"Arthit pointedly looked at the crumpled papers.
Kongpob huffs in annoyance. Poking insides of his left cheek, regarding the elder with a you are an idiot look. Folding his arms over, he raises both his eyebrows in suggestion, " Why not? Go ahead. After all, you are our guest tonight. I should fulfill all your wishes"
The actor bored his frosty, icy stare into the brown ones, making sure the other had his full attention," Money."
"What?", Kongpob straightens. His arms uncrossing. Uncertainty blanks his facial features. Did he mention that he absolutely hates the egoistic twisting of lips, resulting in a coy smile of the elder? Which is exactly what is playing over the otherwise blank face of Arthit.
"You love money," the actor said as a matter of fact. "Remember, you even married me...meee!!!...whom you hate, like fucking loath, just for money", Arthit taunted, enjoying how colour drains from his ex employee's face. His smile grows evil," Despite abhorring me, you tolerated all....my anger, ridiculing.....my touches....those....kisses...you allowed all of it just for money, right?".
"Stop it", Kongpob raged. He feels like he has back peddled months back, into the office where he and Arthit has gotten themselves locked. He has thought that they had made some progress but reality is entirely opposite...How can he cheapen those moments???....
Arthit knows that he is being an irrational jerk full of haughty pride. But he just can't help it.
"Now that I am cutting you off for once and all, you want to encash all in one go. Why not jump on bandawagon when its time, right?", the elder raised both his hands together, giving a quiet clap,"...Good strategy"
" ITS NOT LIKE THAT!!!", Kongpob screeched, his voice raising.
Arthit keeps his index finger over his lips, shusshing the other guy, before gesturing towards the entrance,"these paper thin walls are not soundproof, right?"
The younger one breathes heavily. Closing his eyes, before opening again," It's not like that. Yes, I married you in exchange of money. It was not easy for me too, but I needed that money more than anything. For once can-
"I don't care!!", Arthit didn't let his junior finish." Sign these papers and get your gold digger ass out of my life", saying his last piece, he marches towards the bathroom, closing the door with a loud bang, rattling the hinges in the process.
**********
Arthit takes his sweet time showering, intentionally delaying the confrontation waiting for him outside. Soaking himself in bathtub full of aptly warm water for 30-40 minutes did wonders to his body. He is feeling sluggish but not worn out. Later, he cleans himself well under the shower, scrubbing away all the dirt and grim from 10 hours long drive. He didn't wanted to tip off anyone about him visiting Kongpob which meant he had to drive all the way from Bangkok to Buchesha on his own. God bless Mrs Suthilak that she insisted on him staying the night. Only God knows what would have had happened to him if he had to go back the same way.
Done with his body, Arthit shampoos his hair, washing off the suds thoroughly. Having left nothing else to stall, he steps out, turning off the shower. Wiping off himself with the fluffy grey towel, he wears the night clothes which, surprisingly, fits his size perfectly.....like customized for him.
Rubbing away his head with another towel, Arthit gets out of the room, easing up finding no one around.Throwing away the wet towel over the sofa, he makes his way to the bed only to halt in steps. Watching his ex assistant seated with his back against the sofa backrest, stationed beside the window area. Both eyes closed, long legs up and spread straight, hands joined and resting over his belly. Lost in dreams without any care. The actor sighs, seeing the continuous rising and lowering movement of chest..what a fella!! How can he sleep like a baby in such a time???....
Arthit rounds the bed, sitting over the edge, legs planted over the floor. Both hands stretched backward, palm planting into the soft mattress as he observes the other person.
Kongpob has changed into a velvet maroon robe. His silky, dark and long fringes, turning golden from the roots, scattered aimlessly, mapping the heart shaped face. Those uneven curls swirling as soft breeze passes from the window plays with them...had he ever mentioned how much he loves playing with these long, silky tussels??..twirling these black glossed coils around his finger and unwhirling one at a time....It's one of Arthit's favourite pass time now.
Staying where he is, the actor lifts his finger, and starts to move it in air, tracing the soft edges of cheekbones and chin area peeking out from the golden mass. Projecting as if he is really touching that beautiful face. His finger glides over the thick set of eyebrows naturally shaped and arched at right angles. Long wisps of hair lining the edge of eyelids, slightly curled in the end, fanning the defined cheekbones. The actor clenches his fist, remembering how he has worshipped those gorgeous bedroom eyes that night. How those orbs has teared up prettily when..Stop!! Don't go there.. Arthit heaves a long breath, before uncoiling his wounded hand, and resumes his journey as tips of his finger runs down the thin delicate bridge, a bit upturn nose, leading to a full symmetrical lips, shining with a thin barely there tinch of transparent gloss. Arthit looks away, feeling like a pervert as a storm of lust hits him, reminding him of all times, he has gotten drunk on those sultry puffs, has kissed and sucked on those pouts like a kid sucking on his favourite candy. He exhales deeply to calm down the rush of blood flowing down south with a hurricane speed. Chanting to stop his brain from supplying any more erotic visuals and take risk of awaking the part of him sleeping inside his pajama bottoms.
He gets out of his inner monologue hearing a noise. He looks over and finds his husband, body turned towards him, his head rolling over the backrest. Those black strands working like a divider, hiding the other behind the dark curtain, leaving only glimpses of that pea like nose and part of lips. Due to the movement, the robe other has been wearing hiked from one side, giving an opening to the caramelized skin. Arthit gulps, his eyes trying to pull the rest of the cloth down, tear off the garment having audacity to hide what is his and feast on those chocolate treats....
Slap!!
Slap!!
The actor hits himself first in right cheek, then in left. Waking himself up from lewd and dirty thoughts. Gosh!! He feels like a red hot blood teenager who has no control over his raging testosterones. He used to had these kinds of lust fuelled thoughts before too but at that time he was a virgin and the only person who appeared in his fantasy was his crush. However, it shouldn't be the case now, atleast not when he is all prepared to ditch the other. He had been sexually active all these years and has enough experience under his belt to be this stimulated over just a strip flash. He should not be burning in desire just after a few glimpses of some nude skin. He is much better than that. He won't let his sexually frustrated body confuse him...yes that right. I am just frustrated as it has been so long since I had some... nothing else.... Deciding to sleep it off, he Reaches out and switches off the lights, keeping the bed lamps on. Giving his back to the younger one, Arthit lies on the bed, on his side. Squeezing his eyes, he tries to sleep, counting sheeps and thinking of all other distasteful things. He has almost gotten successful in falling asleep when a thump wakes him up. Disoriented, he sits up and looks around in the dimly litted room, only to find a sleep dazed Kongpob half sprawled half crouched over the floor.
"What? He fall off the sofa??", Arthit wondered. He snickers as the other guy gets on the knees like a toddler.
Kongpob groaned, his knees hurting after bumping against the cold surface. He stopped breathing hearing a very familiar low chuckle. He gritted his teeth...justfukingfantastic!!! why??? Why he has to be first audience of every fucking embarrassing episode of my life???...ugghhh... Mortified, he refused to stand up and decided to just be on the floor for the night.
"What the heck is he doing??", the actor is bemused by the show.
The younger one pretends to be dead, refusing to give any sort of reply and give more ammo to the later for making fun of him.
"Hey Kongpob!! What are you doing??", Arthit calls out when it continues for few minutes. Getting no response, the actor gets off the bed, and crouched before the person, now sprawled over the floor like a star fish. Cheeks and hands flattened against the cool surface.
"Kongpob?? hey??", Arthit nudges the other few times. "Hey!! You can't sleep like this. You will catch cold".
"Go away. Let me be", Kongpob pushed away the hands tapping his shoulder.
The actor huffs and puffs, irritated that he is wasting his sleep time over this person. He pats the other on the shoulder," for the last time, get up and sleep there, okay?"
"Why do you care where I sleep? Ain't I just a money hungry slut in your eyes?", Kongpob peeled open one eye and glared at the elder. But his glowering having no effect on Arthit, who scoffed in reply.
"Care?? Who? me?? And that too for you????hah!!! You wish!!", the actor denied a bit too firmly.
Kongpob can no longer remain in lying position after the declaration. His pride hurting at elder's words. He sits up, dragging his knees against the floor, ignoring the sting. "Did you just mocked me??"
"Yes, I did. What will you do?? Huh?? Go to your mommy and cry???", Arthit taunted.
"Yaaaaa!!!! When did I go and cried to my mom??", Kongpob scowled.
Understanding that this will go on the whole night without any resolve, the actor huffed and puffed before deciding to just drop everything and go to sleep.
"You know what?? Be my guest and just fucking stay on this cold floor for whole night and catch all sorts of diseases", Irked, the actor comes up to his feet, stomping towards the bed, only to come back seconds later. Scooping the other male up in his arms, like a baby and heeds towards the bed.
Kongpob gets brain freeze with the sudden gesture that only when the elder placed him on the mattress that he found his vocal cords. Scrambling to the middle of bed, putting some sort of distance between them. Before he could yell at later, a hiss leaves past the rosy lips, the scratch in his knees stinging like a burnt skin.
"What happened??", Arthit hurriedly presses on the switch, bathing the room in white light. "Let me see", the actor sat cross legged on the bed, taking hold of both feet of younger one, placing them over his folded knees.
Kongpob gasps, his skin tingling where it brushed against the bare hands of the elder. He shrinks in himself, remembering that he is completly naked beneath the robe. He starts to pull away his legs," No need. I am fine"
"Just let me!!! ", Arthit said sternly, stopping the other from moving. His firm voice leaving no room for discussion or rejection.
Kongpob stills hearing the elder. Letting the other grab his feet, placing back in later's lap. Back of his heels resting over the muscular thighs.
"Where does it hurt? Here? Here? Here?", Arthit asks, using finger tips to put pressure on different area of the feet, ankle, shin. Getting a shake of denial everytime. The actor bunches the edges of maroon robe to lift up to check but stops short, hesitating at last moment. Freeing the fabric, he fists his hands, discreetly glancing at his all too quiet husband from under his eyelashes.
"Exactly....where... is it hurting Kong?"
Kongpob licks his lips, eyes downcast, his heart jackhammering as he hears the nickname. He is feeling too conscious of being clothed yet naked in presence of this man. He usually wears t shirt and shorts while sleeping. Tonight, he marched over to the guestroom without any change and ended up wearing the bathrobe. He was all set to spent the night there but bless his mom!! She came out of nowhere and he had left with no choice but to come back. He didn't want to give a stripping show to the actor in case he bursts out of the bathroom while he change. Thus he was waiting for later when he fall asleep.
...why did I wore this??? Ugghh!!!... Clutching the opened, deep collar of his robe with one hand, he fists the fabric lying over his legs and hiked it up, displaying his scraped knees.
Arthit forgets breathing as the maroon curtain is draged away, and a vast expanse of buttery soft skin comes in his vision. Smooth white skin with a pinch of cocoa powder sprinkled over, making those long toned legs appear way more sexy. And that's rich coming from Arthit who has been with more than his fair shares of supermodels and actresses.
"Here", Kongpob pointed softly. He is feeling super nervous and self conscious. Normally he is not one to obsess over appearance but after witnessing Sia and Arthit together, he is having this strange anxiety of what the actor will think now that he has seen how his legs are. All jaggered with blemishes and spots.
Arthit followed the finger and bends his head to examine the knee. Keepimg hos fingers strictly folded and clenched in a tight fist. Using his eyes to check. He has no idea what would he do if he touches those legs.
Finding nothing serious, he explains in a doctoral voice,"You must had the outer skin rubbed against the surface violently while falling down. The membrane has torn itself before slicing up the inner flesh. Wait, I'll patch you up in no time. Do you have first aid kit in here?
Kongpob nodded," Yes.There, in the lower cabinet", he fingered in direction of the wadrobe.
Arthit gets up and takes out the small box with a red plus sign. Uncapping the disinfectant, he picks up an ear quilt, dipping it in the solution before dabbing it ever so gently over the torned flesh, blowing over once and then in case the wound is stinging.
"What are you doing?", Kongpob asked suddenly, earning an are you an idiot look.
"Can't you see?? I am treating your wound", Arthit snarked, rolling his eyes.
"Why?", Kongpob asked again. This time Arthit didn't even raised his head. Thinking that Kongpob's stupid query doesn't deserve a glance from him.
'Answer me. Why are you doing this?", Kongpob repeated, earning a frustrated growl from the other before glancing up, giving younger one a shrewd look." You are such a wacko case, ain't you?? What do you mean why am I doing it?? If I don't treat you wounds now-
"So what? So what if this small injury doesn't get treated?", Kongpob questioned in a very calm voice. Controlling all his urges to throw all his cautions to wind and hug this clueless guy.
The actor cursed out loud for being questioned for nth time. "Fuck Kong!!! have you totally gone mad?? It will hurt you, dammit!!! It will give you pain -
"Exactly!!", Kongpob cuts off the later," it will hurt Me. Not you. Then why? What is it to you if I am in pain or not? It's you who cuts me every now and then with your cruelest words. And it's also you who heals my scars. Exactly why?', tears shimmer in younger one's eyes. His chin trembles, lips wobbly, chest feels too tight and constricted. He pats his left side, where his heart is pumping," Do you have any idea how much your mean remarks hurt me?? I feel like being skinned, and butchered into pieces like some meat. Your words no matter how truest they are...they cut me the deepest!!! I want to yell at you, scream at you for hurting me when I am not even aware of what wrong I did to you, but then I can not. I just can not. Do you know why??"
Arthit goes quiet at the outburst. Too stunned with later's confession. He can only listen to the younger one who is now openly crying with tears trailing down the face. He can't say that he is not aware of his hot and cold attitude towards Kongpob. But he has no control over it. He hates younger one but he can't say that he, now, unloves the guy.
Kongpob is aware that he is not getting any answer from Arthit today. May be some other time, some other day elder will give answers to all his questions, but that day is definitely not today. So, he does the only thing he could do. Bare out his conflicting emotions to the guy.
"Even though I wished to be angry at you, I can't. Cause every time you throw those hurtful words to me, I see the pain in your eyes. I see how you are hurting way more than me. I don't know why but I don't want you in agony-
"Yet...you are the one who caused all this tormenting grief to me", Arthit uttered. His eyes back to hard and blank.
"You do hate me a lot.", Kongpob said, blinking repeatedly to stop his tears. Fixing his gaze up at the ceiling, avoiding looking at the elder. Wiping tears off his face, which seems a difficult task with how drops after drops keeps on spilling out of his eyelids.
Arthit sighs, watching the other person, quietly sniffling and sobbing. Avoiding to look in his direction. His heart squeezes out, not liking the blotchy face, wet with tears. However, this time he did nothing except watching. Even though those tears are slicing him up each time they fall, urging him to embrace the other guy and coax him, tell him how none of the things is true, except the actor remained silent. Whatever Kongpob has said is not wrong entirely. He can not refute the fact that he hates Kongpob. He really do.
Lack of an answer makes Kongpob burst into tears as he bites on his lips to subdue any noise.
Arthit removes the bare feet off his lap with great gentleness and places it back on the mattress before coming to his feet.
"Go to sleep Kong...", words floated in the empty air. Seconds later, there's a click sounded in the room, telling kongpob that his ex boss has left the room. Making him feel more miserable, defeated, crushed and all....alone all over again.
******