"AAAAAAHHHHH-"
"Hyunjin! What the-"
"Don't curse, hyung! Don't curse! We have a baby here!"
"Sorry, sorry! I forgot about Su-"
"HAHAHAHA,"
"Why are suddenly laughing?"
"Hahahahaha, I almost killed myself~~"
"Hyunjin? Are you okay?"
"Huh? What's going on, honeybun?"
Tremendous scandalous I caused when I got out of the kitchen.
It was on purpose. Not that I was falling because I tripped on the edge of the door.
I knew exactly what Jisung's brother wanted to say, so I needed to intervene. He recognised the resemblance between Jisung and Su-jin.
Also, Jisung mentioning Jinsu just like that would be causing Chan hyung to suspect everything.
I couldn't manage both parts. I just couldn't. So, if acting like a fool would stop or delay this bomb, then I would do everything in my hands to delay it.
"Are you okay, Hyunjin?" Jisung asked concerned when he saw Chan hyung pulling me up from my arm.
I was just one inch from the floor.
The act of falling was too real for everyone.
Tsk! I even fooled myself.
"Yeah, I'm sorry! I don't know what happened. I'm so clumsy today, hahaha..."
Jisung chuckled and shook his head when he noticed that I was okay. That bright smile made his brother look at him in awe.
Changbin's gaze was interesting. It gave me the feeling he hadn't seen his little brother smile like that in a while.
"Are you sure just today?" Jisung quipped while raising an eyebrow. "Should I count the times you've been this clumsy?"
My cheeks blushed hard. Those countless times I've been embarrassing myself in front of him are not a joke.
It kind of saddens me that Jisung has only known my goofy side. In the past, and even in the present.
My reputation couldn't be more ruined in front of him. I swear I am my enemy.
I rubbed the back of my neck in pure instinct. My face felt so hot, and I knew everyone could see it. With my light skin, it's impossible not to notice when I am blushing.
Changbin was looking at me with an unreadable expression. He was quietly observing the interaction between his brother and me.
And just then I noticed we hadn't said hi.
"Changbin hyung..." I called out.
I smiled at him and bowed. It's been a while since I saw him.
I think only at that time in the club we met. The rest of the time I had more interaction with his little brother than him. I also know a few things Chan hyung has told me about him.
Having a baby it's not easy. My life goes around Su-jin. I do have not much time to mingle in other people's lives.
"Hey..." Jisung's brother greeted back without a single expression of joy on his face.
I don't know why, but the way he greeted me was so dry. As if he wasn't happy to see me.
I blinked repeatedly in confusion. I think I missed something while I was spacing out.
"Are you okay, hyung?"
"You-"
"Honey,"
Changbin was about to say something to me after that dry greeting, but Jisung suddenly interrupted him.
The older had his eyes narrowed, but changed it after being called by his little brother.
He pursued his lips as he listened to Jisung, and after that, he put a smile on his face. A forced one I could tell.
It took him time to greet me back again, which caused me curiosity.
"Long time no see, Hyunjin..." he said with a casual tone. It was weird how he suddenly behaved.
Something is not okay, but I can't tell what is not okay.
"Yeah, long time no see, Changbin hyung..." I commented while looking at Jisung and Changbin alternatively.
I was trying to read the whole picture but to no avail.
"I didn't know Jisung and you became good friends after that day you met..."
I turned to Jisung and this one shook his head. As if he wasn't approving his brother's comment. The shake of his head was subtle, but I could notice.
Jisung's smile vanished from his lips and soon a scowl appeared on this same one.
He got near his brother and elbowed him. After some whispers his brother sighed and rubbed his temples. He was being scolded.
I was lost in this situation. I had no idea why Changbin was acting like that towards me.
He has always been nice and the things Jisung and Chan have told me about him let me know that he is a good guy.
Why the sudden change of personality towards me?
Not only him, but also Jisung.
Knowing that Jisung hadn't mentioned me in his conversations kind of hurt. It makes me feel irrelevant in his life.
I know I'm not that special in his life, but I mean, it still hurts.
His brother shook his head. I don't know what Jisung told him that provoked that expression.
"Ji-dada..."
Soon Su-jin interrupted the whole scene. He yearned for Jisung's attention.
"Hey there, little one... I haven't forgotten about you... How's the cutest baby in this world, huh?~"
When Changbin saw Jisung smiling and pampering my baby, he frowned.
Something was bothering him. Apparently.
"Whose this baby?" he asked dryly.
"I-"
Jisung replied to the question before I did. "Hyung...this is Hyunjin's baby..."
"Hyunjin's? Huh?"
Changbin opened his eyes considerably and turned in my direction at light speed.
He scrutinised me from head to toe as if what he heard was unbelievable.
"Is that true?" his face looked unpleasant, "This baby is yours?"
I felt a drop of sweat run down my head. I got nervous.
It was as if Jisung's brother could read through me or knew something. Maybe my nervousness was so evident.
I had not the guts to utter the word 'yes'. So, I nodded only.
Lying has never been my thing.
Fortunately, Jisung spoke again, "Yes, he is. And you know something very interesting about this baby besides the obvious reasons, hyung?"
Changbin looked at him this time and shook his head. "What is it, honeybun?"
"He has the same name, hyung..."
"What name?" Changbin raised his eyebrows in surprise.
"The one I came up with together with her..." Jisung said with a bright smile.
Changbin paused for a moment before his expression softened after hearing and processing what his brother said. "You mean- You mean..."
"Yes, hyung..." Jisung nodded, "The name of this baby is Su-jin..."
Jisung's brother almost choked. His face changed colours at the mention of the name and even his eyes became glossy.
He took a step forward as if wanting to go and comfort his little brother. There was a type of nostalgia on his face.
"Honeybun, I-" Changbin stopped mid-sentence. Jisung had placed a hand on his cheek.
"I know, hyung," Jisung's expression also softened. He subtly caressed Changbin's cheek and looked at him with a dim smile, "...I know... I'm also aware of that..."
"Are you sure?"
Jisung hummed.
"But, that-"
"Please, don't start with that again, hyung..."
"I know...but..."
"Stop it, hyung... Don't hurt us more..."
Behind in the kitchen, Chan was observing everything with a clueless expression.
I was understanding at the beginning. But soon I was just like him. Sharing that same cluelessness.
I had no idea what the brothers were talking about. It seemed something serious and private.
"Hyunjin...what's going on?" Chan asked at last.
I felt sorry for not being able to tell my best friend what was going on, but I needed to keep it like that for at least tomorrow.
"I'll tell you later...please keep your word and promise me what I asked you earlier..."
"I already promised it, but-"
Changbin suddenly spoke, bringing my attention back to him, "Chan never told me you had a baby...are you also married?"
I smiled thinly. I didn't know if I should shake or nod my head.
I could feel my best friend's stare. I couldn't lie in front of him.
"Are you-"
He was about to ask more, but Jisung interfered.
"Hyung, enough. You've been rude."
"Why? I just want to know-"
"Stop it."
"But-"
"I said, stop it." Jisung nagged and accommodated my baby in his arms.
He pecked Su-jin's forehead because this one kept calling his attention and then looked at me, "Hyunjin, are you ready? We can go now for that lunch..."
"Yeah- I-"
"Honeybun-"
Jisung bowed to his brother, my friend and came to me. He gently took my hand and squeezed it, "Let's go, yeah? I'm hungry..."
I instantly let myself be pulled by Jisung.
At that moment, I didn't know what to say or how to act.
The mood suddenly turned dense, and there was no way to know how to read the whole thing since context was needed.
As I was slowly leaving the house with Jisung dragging me by the hand, I took a peek at Changbin.
He seemed hurt. His expression was showing that feeling.
I wondered why they suddenly acted like that. They seemed pretty much close the last time I saw them together.
Changbin sighed, moved his hands in his pockets and looked down.
Chan went in his direction, placed a hand over Changbin's head and asked, "How come you haven't greeted me, huh? What was all this about? Are you and Jisung on bad terms?"
Changbin, instead of looking at Chan, kept his head low.
I saw his mouth moving, but I couldn't read his lips or hear anything.
I just could read my friend's lips when he said, "It's okay, he knows you love him."
That was the last thing I could see before I was completely taken out of the house.
As we got to the front part of the house, Jisung released my hand unexpectedly, which made me turn to him.
He released my hand to hug Su-jin with both arms and kept pampering with kisses and sweet words.
The scene was lovely to witness from behind.
I wanted to ask Jisung what just happened. I was wondering why Changbin seemed mad at me. If I ever did something, or why he replied to his brother in that way, but Jisung kept walking without looking at me.
His whole attention was on Su-jin while heading straight to the car.
When I noticed this last thing, I ran to open the door for him and Su-jin, afterwards I got inside.
It is not like I would be cancelling our plans or intervening in this same moment when is more than clear that he doesn't want to talk about what just happened.
I would be an idiot if I didn't read the room.
Inside the car, the only sounds were Su-jin's yawn. Even though he was all excited to see Jisung, he couldn't hide how sleepy he was.
If he was in this way maybe Chan hyung fed him before we arrived to pick him up.
Jisung beamed at this and soon accommodated the baby in his arms, soothed him and gave small rubs on his back to put him to sleep.
"Su-jin-ah~ Let's sleep a little bit, okay? Take a nap, baby. I'll hold you until you wake up..."
My heart scrunched. It was heartbreaking for me to see and hear this.
Father and son had no idea they were father and son. At least Jisung, because Su-jin recognized him owed it to Jinsu's doctor.
Since I didn't know what to do or say, I decided to put on my seat belt and turn on the engine to go away from my friend's house.
Once he saw that we were far away from Chan hyung's house, Jisung dared to speak.
"Hyunjin..."
"Yes...?"
The sudden call of my name took me aback.
I thought he wouldn't be talking to me until we arrived at our destination. Which, if I'm honest, I don't know where that is.
"I'm so sorry..."
"Huh? Why are you saying 'sorry'?"
"I want to apologize..."
"Apologize?" I asked genuinely confused. There was nothing he should apologize for. "Why?"
Silence surrounded the car before he gathered his words to elaborate, "I know you don't want to talk about Su-jin's mom... My brother was so rude to ask about it...but, please don't get mad at him. He is a good person. If you ever want to get mad, then please get mad at me...after all, it was my fault..."
"Why? Why would it be your fault?" I stopped at a red light, focusing all my attention on him.
"Well..." He sighed as he caressed Su-jin's cheeks. "I haven't talked about you to my brother...as you noticed..."
My eyebrows twitched. I didn't say anything. I just kept listening attentively.
"I never mentioned Kkami, nor Su-jin to my brother, Hyunjin...so, that's why he might have behaved rudely towards you..."
"Why not?" My face suddenly changed from confused to soft. There was something in his reply that saddened me.
It seemed there was something hidden that could make me emotional and I wanted to know about it.
"I don't know..." Jisung sighed for the second time and turned to the window. He might not want to face me or he simply didn't care to tell me the things while looking at my eyes.
"Maybe I didn't want to...maybe I forgot...or maybe I was not in the mood to share that good feeling..."
He continued before I could say something. "Don't misunderstand me, okay? I'm really glad I met you, all of you. But...you know...whenever I get home, I forget about whatever had happened outside of it... The bad and the good. All of it."
"What do you mean? Why is that?"
I gripe my seatbelt.
I felt something in his voice, so I rapidly scanned the road to see if there was a good spot I could park if needed. The street light could change at any second.
"My house is filled with Jinsu's memories, Hyunjin..." He dropped the comment, making me gaze back at him. He was still facing the window, not aware of my reaction, "Jinsu is the culprit of it...my sweet princess..."
"Jinsu...?" I mumbled my cousin's name without me noticing.
I knew it. I knew there were lots of memories of my precious cousin in that house.
"Yes, my wife..." He hummed and turned back to face the front window of the car.
He continued with a tender voice, "Once I arrive home, I can't help to think about anything else but her. Jinsu is 24/7 in my mind, heart and life, Hyunjin...all I think about when I wake up and go to sleep is my princess...there's no space for anything else...and I love that, I don't want to forget her..."
My lips tightened. A lump tried to form in my throat.
I was dying inside. He had faced a lot of horrible things, and to tell him what was going on was not a good thing right now.
I spoke this time, "That's why you never talked about me to your brother and much less about Su-jin, right...?"
Jisung nodded, "The other time when I told you that Su-jin is the vivid image of my princess, I was not lying... He really resembles her. A lot." He commented as he took a peeked at my baby, "and Changbin hyung noticed it as well..." A faint smile formed on his lips as he examined Su-jin, "he also did..."
"And why you didn't let your brother hold Su-jin?"
There was a pause before he elaborated.
"Because..."
The way Jisung bit his lower lip made me realize I had asked something sensible.
Maybe a topic he was not ready to talk about.
"I-"
"Because I didn't want to see my brother cry..."
"Huh? Why would he cry?"
"Well..." he sighed, "my brother and Jinsu used to bet me that we would be having a baby boy while I was sure it would be a baby girl... Up until now...my brother kept telling me that he and Jinsu were right... He has the crazy idea that my baby was swapped...but that's impossible...I saw her...I saw the baby....she was so small...fragile and sick...I saw her...I saw her die...just like I saw my princess die..."
I pulled over when I saw the light turning green. His voice was cracking. That was not a good sign.
I took my seatbelt off and scooted close to Jisung.
I placed my arm around his shoulders and brought him to me. "You don't need to continue if talking about this hurts you...it's okay...I understand..."
Jisung was taken aback by my sudden action, but he melted into my embrace after feeling secure. He held Su-jin warmly and closed to his chest, then said, "Thank you for understanding. I didn't want my brother to make you feel uncomfortable..."
He stretched his hand and took mine in his, "Don't misunderstand my brother, Hyunjin. I swear he is the kindest and the sweetest person in the world... He is just hurt. Jinsu's death affected him as much as it affected me... But that's not an excuse... I'll make him apologise-"
"No need to..." I surrounded his body with my both arms, having a good hold of him and Su-jin. "I know he is a good person just by the way he looks after you...and the way my best friend talks about him... So, don't tell him anything. I promise he didn't offend me... I'm good."
Jisung lifted his face to meet my eyes. I looked at him with a faint smile plastered on my face.
He examined me for a second before asking, "Hyunjin, what happened to you all those weeks? Why did you disappear? Were you okay?"
My forced smile dropped from my face.
The grip I had on him also loosened, but he was quick to grab my face before I could avert my gaze.
"Hey...what happened? You cannot tell me?"
I looked at those beautiful eyes.
There were a lot of things going on. A lot of emotions.
The reason I looked for him today was because I wanted to tell him everything. But there was also something telling me that it was not the right time. And now that I have him in front it's so difficult.
I feel terrified.
"I was...busy..." I said while averting my eyes to the floor. "A lot of work came by..."
Jisung retrieved his hand from my face and stayed quiet for a moment.
I could feel his stare on me, though.
The fact that I knew he was staring at me didn't help much. My cheeks were getting red with each passing second.
Even though I was not looking at Jisung and couldn't see what expression he had, I knew he was thinking about something.
"Hyunjin..."
"Yes?"
I turned to see him and then followed where he was point it out.
I had to lower a little bit my head to read the banner on an old wall of the building I had just parked near.
"What's that?" I asked confused.
He shrugged. "Apparently, there's a new cafeteria for babies on the other side... Shall we go?"
I smiled at him and nodded, "Sounds nice...let's go."
What a smooth way of changing the topic. He is so nice.
---