the next morning I woke up at five I never wake up at five, running to the bathroom for the second day in a row to empty my stomach of whatever food i had yesterday. i tried to go back to sleep after that but i couldn't. I got up looking at how peaceful Conrad is when he sleeps, if only he stayed like that. I slowly got up, careful not to wake him, and walk downstairs, to the beach.
i sat on the beach and watch the sunrise I could hear his footsteps, i new it was him. I didn't say anything I just looked at the ocean. he sat next to me I don't know how long we were sitting there in silence but it seems like forever.
" you were gone when I woke up," he finally asked " just needed some air" i answered, still looking at the Ocean.
then his eyes travel to my thigh and the bruise covering the outside of it. it looked worse than it felt "did i do that... shit Lottie i'm so sorry I was just trying to get you out of the way I didn't mean to push you"
"i know" i finally looking at him, to be honest it barely hurt I have bigger problems.
I touched his cheek and smiled, I want to scream at him, I want to tell him everything but I can't because he can't hear that right now. he needs me. He doesn't need to know about the secret growing inside me, not yet at least. so I rested my head on his shoulder and we looked out of the ocean together.
I know I need to go to the doctor to get a check up to confirm, I know I'm pregnant, if I thought I wasn't I would've took a million tests. I think I already new when I took it. I new what it was going to say.
"we should probably go inside"looked up at him he hesitated then Nodes.
we were sitting in the living room I could hear the boys laughing about the portraits we had to sit for making stupid jokes like boys do.
I had apologised to my Mum this morning about how I reacted last night, I told her I was just tired and apologised for not keeping an eye on my siblings. like always it's my fault if they do the wrong thing.
I was reading a book with my feet on Conrads lap when i overheard the conversation everyone was having. then Susan ran into the kitchen, with the biggest smile on her face.
"Oh, my God! Belly is gonna be a debutante"
I figured Susan were trying to get belly to do it like she did with me, it was never really my thing. but i did it for her I would do anything to make her happy Conrad went with me. We actually had a pretty fun time we got so drunk and stayed out till 3 am, we kissed in the rain on the beach, It was perfect.
"It's really not that big of a deal"
"I'm sorry. Like, Belly? Like, my sister? Like, that thing right there? "
"Shut up"
"Okay, this is gonna be so much fun. Just you wait. There is, uh... there's the tea, the auction, the ball, of course, the rehearsal. I got to write this down. Susan gasps We need to go shopping"
"This sounds... expensive" mum says we don't have as much money as the fishers did .
"Oh, don't worry, Laur. It's on me just like how I paid for Violet's . It was my idea after all, and we still need to style you for your book party, so... "
"Belly, are you sure you want to do this? It doesn't seem very you"
"It's not" Conrad Timed in, I took my feet off his lap because he was annoying me. He gave me a look like what did I do now, I just shook my head and went back to reading my book. he can say whatever he likes to me, but not to my sister.
" Conrad, could you please be a little more supportive"
"Now, which one of you is gonna be Belly's escort to the ball?"
"Not me. I went last year" he smiled at me. I tried to hide the smile on my face, covering it with my book. Bring back the memory of that night.
"Yeah, and I swore off balls" getting a laugh from my brother he is so childish Sometimes. it's weird to think he's only one younger than Me.
I close my book and decide to go up to my room I called the doctor make an appointment I quickly hanged up the phone when Conrad walked in. Thank God we were done with our conversation.
"hey" give me a weird look, i probably looked really suspicious
"hey" I smiled "do you want to go for a swim" "umm actually" good thing. I am a good liar "I was gonna go for a run" "okay I'll join you" no I said probably too fast "I actually just want to clear my head. You know get some fresh air next time though I'll see you later" I was already in my gym leggings. and i was in Conrads hoody with a T-shirt underneath so I didn't need to change.
so I just walked out of the room before he could ask questions I got into my car putting my hands on the steering wheel, pressing my forehead against it with my eyes closed, and let out a breath