THE LAKE HOUSE
It was August and summer what slowly trudging to an end. With this news of Captain Holt's relationship issues the squad sat at Shaw's. Amy and Jake sat in front of the bar as they shared a drink, perched closely, was Charles who was talking to Terry about local scarf businesses as Y/N listened in. They were in their usual seats.
"Hey, everybody. I got your text. What's the big emergency?" Rosa asked as they arrived at the squad's table before plonking down beside Y/N.
"We need to talk about Captain Holt's love life," Jake explained as Rosa groaned with a classic eye-roll.
"Come on, you've missed being dragged into your coworkers' personal lives, admit it."
"It's true, I have. What's going on?" Rosa disclosed, her hand on Y/N's thigh. creasing it softly.
"Captain Holt is in pain, and we need to help him get back together with Kevin." Jake elaborated before crossing his arms over his chest.
"No, we don't. Holt is a very private person." Amy denied, pursing her lips. "We shouldn't get involved."
"Okay, you guys probably don't know this, but my parents got divorced when I was a kid, and it really messed me up," Jake confessed, hands now seated on his lap as the squad groan slightly.
"What, no way?" Y/N sarcastically remarked.
"Yeah, we know." Amy grits her teeth.
"Oh, my God." Rosa nodded her head listlessly.
"What, do I talk about it a lot?" Jake looked around the room as Amy glared at him making him continue. "It doesn't matter. The point is, we can't let that happen to Daddy Holt and Daddy Kevin."
"So we're just dispensing with subtext now?"
"Yes, this workplace is my family--was that not clear? Y/N is my twin sister, Holt is my dad, you're my mean older sister, and Amy's my mom." Jake signaled to a few key people in the group as Amy's face dropped.
"What?"
"What? What did I say?"
"You said, 'Amy is my mom'," Amy recalled, her brows in a twist of concern.
"Nobody said anything! We don't have time for this, Amy." Jake blurted out causing Amy to sigh whilst crossing her arms simultaneously. "Now, who's gonna help me Parent Trap Holt and Kevin?" He asked as everyone averted their gaze. "Seriously? Y/N/N, come on, you can be the Hallie to my Annie? It's our dream!" He practically begged.
"Does it mean we can eat Oreos and peanut butter together?" Y/N's face lifted.
"That's absolutely right and even better—" Jake started before Amy interrupted him.
"Okay, new plan!" Amy announced as Y/N and Jake's faces deflate. "Look, Holt just needs us to be there for him. Help him take his mind off of Kevin." She said wistfully.
"He's always inviting us to his lake house to go birdwatching, but we never do it because it's, you know, birdwatching." Terry's face scrunched as he shrugged. "We could finally go."
"He would love that." Amy beamed.
"Wow, stabbed in the back by my own mom."
"What?"
"Wife! I said, wife! Why do you keep not hearing me? Whatever! Let's just do Terry's plan." Jake muttered, changing the subject.
~
It was now the next day, the squad stood outside the precinct packing their bags into Terry's car. "You know, I thought it over, and I gotta hand it to you guys: this trip is actually a really great idea." Jake bobbed his head, placing his hands on his hips.
"This is surprising. You're usually a lot more petulant when we don't go along with your schemes." Terry bounced.
"Stratagems." Jake corrected with both hands. "And I've grown up a lot, Terry."
"Uh, you do know there's no phone reception at the lake house."
"No!" Jake groaned, sinking into his knees. "How am I gonna catch Pokémon? It doesn't matter. It's a community event weekend, so..." He trailed off before huffing away as Y/N strolled up.
"Hey!" Y/N smiled, placing her luggage away.
"Hey!" Amy looked up from the car to Y/N.
"Wow, you're really prepared!" Y/N pointed out. "You got a pack-and-play, baby monitor, white noise machine...Wow!" She marveled at all of Amy's baby supplies. "This is a lot of stuff, Ames."
"Yeah, you can't be too careful, I bought 43 diapers!" Amy cocked her head.
"For one night?"
"Mac has a small bladder." Amy elaborated as she rearranged everything in the boot of the car. "Plus, once Jake and I are done with this baby stuff, Rosa and you can have it!"
Y/N's eyes widen as she hesitated, as Terry called out, "Last pee call! Go now! Terry isn't stopping on the way there." He said through his teeth with a small mutter.
"I gotta go to the bathroom," Y/N stated as she plonked the rest of her belonging in the boot.
"Okay. I'll save you a seat!" Amy exclaimed back to the girl. "I found a three-hour podcast on the letter 'W'! We can listen to it all of it on the way there." She squealed, Y/N gave an excited thumbs-up before rushing off to the bathroom.
"Hey, Rosa!" Amy beamed as the girl walks up to her.
"Hey. How long is the drive up there? I wanna time my edible so it kicks in right when we arrive." Rosa clutched onto her bag as Amy stood frozen. "What?"
"Nothing. It's cool. I'm not gonna tell anybody. I'm not a narc." Amy pointed to herself awkwardly with a nod.
"All right, you can tell people."
"Good, because I'm a narc."
"I'm not a cop anymore, and I have a prescription for anxiety, so it's legal." Rosa bobbed her shoulders. "It'll be good for when all the drama starts."
"Why do you think there's gonna be drama?"
"Oh, no, you're right. Whenever we go on one of these group trips everything's totally normal and there's never any big conflict." Rosa recalled the last few trips with the squad. "Anyway, I'm just gonna pop one of these right now for no reason." She places a tablet into her mouth.
"I'm not looking." Amy averts her eyes before turning back slowly. "So, what are you like when high?" She hesitates with the discussion.
"There are three levels. Horny, huggy, and hungry!" Rosa numbered as Amy stood there in silence before hesitating a weird noise. "And in that order."
"Oh."
~
It had been a few hours later, the squad had now finally rolled up to the so-called 'lake house'. "Welcome to the Lake House," Holt announced walking from the front porch to the cars.
"Where's the lake? I didn't see it on the way in." Terry looked out into the distance to find a glimpse of any water.
"That's because there's no lake up here."
"But you said it was a lake house."
"No, we called it The Lake House. It was once owned by Kirsopp Lake, the scholar of textual criticism who wrote 'Dated Greek Manuscripts to the Year 1200'." Holt recalled to everyone, who he thought also knew.
"Yeah, Terry, it's obviously named after Kirsopp Lake. No one else was confused about that." Jake muttered, holding Mac's car seat in one hand.
"Can we call it a tree house then?" Y/N signaled to the trees surrounding them.
"No. Don't be absurd."
~
Now inside, the squad were making themselves comfortable. "Oh, hey, Captain Holt, do you have the Wi-Fi network? I need to Facetime with Hitchcock." Scully wandered up with his blue iPad.
"Oh, there's no internet at the Lake House."
"Then I'm alone."
"We're all here." Terry pointed to the group.
"So you'll do the 64-round tournament Hitchcock and I designed to determine the best flavor of potato chip?" Scully's face beamed as he described heaven.
"No, that sounds like hell. Now, let me give you all a tour."
~
"This is the sitting room." Holt opened the door to see two chairs and a chess table. "We considered referring to it as a living room, but decided against it."
"Fascinating!"
~
"This is the TV room." Holt and the squad looked into another room. "Or it was before we got rid of the TV. Now it is also a sitting room."
"Two sitting rooms?"
~
"Now this--this is why we bought the place," Holt announced as the squad follow him into a third room. "The master sitting room."
"Wow, look at all this seating!"
"Jake, can I talk to you for a second?" Terry piped up with a question.
~
Nearby, the two talk, "What's going on? There is no way you are this enthusiastic about too many sitting rooms and lake houses that aren't lake houses." He muffed.
"I'm just trying to be there for Captain Holt. I understand that the weekend's not about me." Jake explained his plan.
"Nope. You're up to something."
"I'm up to nothing, Terrence, and frankly, I resent the implication-- " Jake started before being interrupted by a faint 'Hello?'. "Okay, I'm up to something, Terrence."
"Hello?"
"I messed with Holt and Kevin's shared calendar. You know me so well!" Jake grinned as Kevin entered the lake house. "Oh, Kevin, what a surprise!" He stood still, awkwardly.
"Why are you all in my house? Raymond?" Kevin called out.
Holt strolled into the room holding two bed sheets, "Kevin? What are you doing here?"
Rosa laughed from a distance, "Ha, my edibles just kicked in." She finger gunned the sky before grabbing tenderly onto Y/N's arm. "Come here, gorgeous."
~
A while has now passed, and the squad were still waiting around in the living room, "What did Kevin say? Is everything okay?" Jake questioned.
"No. We just had a knock-down, drag-out fight."
~
"My calendar had the Lake House as free."
"Strange. Mine had it as unoccupied."
"Well, it seems we're at an impasse."
"I would call it more of a deadlock."
~
Back in the present, Y/N piped up, "Wow, how scary, sir." She sat there emotionless as Rosa kissed her fingers. one by one.
"I know, he gets in such good zingers," Holt recalled. "He's tired from driving, so he's staying the night and going back in the morning." He tilted his head.
"Well, that could be good. Maybe you guys can spend some time together." Jake suggested his next plan.
"We've agreed to keep our distance and issue a verbal warning anytime one of us is about to enter the room." Holt denied, walking off. "Raymond Holt entering the kitchen!" He proclaimed.
"Jake, this is bad."
"Raymond Holt entering the second sitting room."
"Okay, just give it a shot. They're already separated, it can't get any worse."
"It's a really good point." Rosa signaled, holding Y/N's hand.
"Thank you, Rosa."
"She's high as hell," Amy added, rocking Mac side to side.
"And horny as hell." Y/N's cheek flushed a red-pinkish color as Rosa now kissed along her arm.
"That's also a really good point." Rosa took a second to respond before continuing her trail of love. "Is this okay?" She looked up as Y/N nodded swiftly.
"Damnit, Rosa." Jake groaned. "Charles, what about you? You're my best friend. You support me in everything I do." He looked from Rosa to the boy.
"Oh, maybe the fact that I'm not on board is a sign that it's a really bad idea."
"No, you've changed somehow, that's the only explanation. Guys, come on, I've got a great plan here. No one wants in?"
"Absolutely not!" Terry rejected.
~
Exactly fifty-three seconds Jake stood in the kitchen as Terry strolled up to him, "Tell me the plan. I want in." Terry whispered to the boy, now changing sides.
"What? You do?" Jake shook his head in shock.
"Yeah. Terry loves love."
"Then why didn't you back me up in there?"
"Because Terry also loves hedging."
"Terry loves hedging?" Jake's face knotted in confusion. "That's new."
"No, it's classic Terry. Look, I always play both sides till the last possible minute, everyone knows that." Terry explained with a scoff.
"That's not fair. Everyone's so hard on me. I want a public show of support for my plan." Jake suggested as he placed his hands on his hips.
"Can't do it. Look, I don't know what's so tough for you to understand here. I love the scheme, I wanna be a part of it, but I think it's gonna fail, and I don't want people to think I was a part of it." Terry shrugged as he elaborated.
"Fine, I'll take what I can get."
"Yes!"
~
It had now been a few hours later, and Jake had now finally convinced Terry to join him on his 'Parent Trap' plan, meanwhile, upstairs Amy was trying to put Mac to bed, "Damn it, these blackout curtains don't keep the light out." Amy rips her temporary blinds down. "Ugh! You screwed me on this, Shannon from Buy Buy Baby!" She barked.
"You know, Amy, Mac's issues with sleeping might not be the light in the room, it might be the darkness in your heart." Charles piped up.
Amy's head jerks back, "Excuse me?" She said through her teeth.
"Sorry, that was mean. I was trying to be poetic." Charles soothed as Amy rocked Mac. "It's important to be mindful of your energy when you're with an infant. Trust me, I'm sort of a natural mother." He praised himself with a small smile.
"Yeah, natural motherfucker." Amy exclaimed with a snarky grin as Y/N ran swiftly into the room. "Oh! Good, Y/N/N, can you help me?" She exhaled a sigh of relief.
"No, I'm here to hide," Y/N whispered, crouched herself behind the bed.
"Why? Did Scully take his shoes off again?"
"No, Rosa is too horny!" Y/N denied from the floor as Mac continued to cry.
"So, no snorking?"
"No, Charles, I only do consensual snorking!" Y/N admitted, peeking over the bed to answer the boy. "She's high! I'm just gonna wait it out!"
"Understandable!"
"Fair enough. Snork-free zone." Charles places his hands on his hips as the two women shake their heads with a grimace as Rosa laughs from the door frame behind them.
"How long have you been there?" Amy looks over to the door as Y/N ducks below the mattress.
"Oh, man, I have no idea. Do you know where my girl is?"
~
It had been a solid hour, and Y/N was still hiding from Rosa behind Jake and Amy's bed, she was waiting for her wife to descend into the hugging faze of being high. Meanwhile, Amy cradled Mac in the third seating room whilst Scully ate his chips nearby, "Oh, hey, Amy. Starting round three. You wanna try New Mexico-style Chile Verde?" Scully shook the large bag of chips in her face.
"Uh, my hands are kind of full here, Scully."
"I can toss it to you." Scully through the chip, landing on Mac.
"Wha-- Scully, don't throw chips at my baby!" Amy bellowed, turning around in sigh. "Ugh. Shh, shh, shh." She exhaled. "I can't believe what I'm about to do."
~
"Charles, I need your help." Amy stood now back in her bedroom, patting her baby on the back.
"I'm not gonna gloat. I'm just happy he's getting the care he needs." Charles cradled Mac.
"Okay, you might wanna be a little less cocky until after you actually get him down. Because, you know, some babies are just fussy and there's nothing that anyone can--" Amy mumbled on as Mac stopped crying. "Oh, my God, is he asleep?"
"So can I be cocky now?"
"Go ahead, Charles," Y/N whispered from the bed.
Amy and Charles both face Y/N, equally surprised. "You're still here?"
"Yes."
"Dude, Rosa left her horny spell like forty minutes ago."
"I fell asleep."
~
Meanwhile, outside, Jake and Terry were on faze three of their plan--corn crake. Jake and Terry were leading the two men to a picnic by distracting them with bird watching. Back inside, Charles was putting Mac down to bed as Y/N watched on, "Oh, and do you need the shades?" Charles whispered.
"Wow." Y/N nodded along. "It totally doesn't, he's already asleep." She muttered back, quietly.
~
"He forgot the sleep sack! And Mac doesn't even care! I can't watch this." Amy wailed as she watched through the sleep monitor.
~
"Yes! Wow!" Charles beams before moonwalking out into the hall as Y/N slowly followed behind.
With the door locking behind them with a thud the two glance at each other before running back to the door. "Oh no!" Y/N yanked the handle, before stepping back to run her fingers through her hair. "I think it's locked!"
"Oh, no, no, no, no." Charles shakes the door, his eyes widen. "I think we just locked Mac in his room." He turned back to Y/N who was practically frozen. "What do we do?" The boy questioned with concern as Rosa wandered around the corner. "Rosa! We locked Mac in his room, we need your--
"There's my girl!" Rosa giggled as she cut off the boy before embracing Y/N. "I missed you."
~
Now in the kitchen, Y/N and Charles scrambled around to find anything that can open a door, whilst Rosa sat on the counter eating ice cream, now in the third stage of being high—hunger, "Rosa, do you have an axe?" Y/N looked up from the cabinet as Rosa laughed.
"Are there tools in here? You see a saw anywhere?" Charles rushed around
"I told you to stay away, Charles. I'm not into your energy." Rosa waved her spoon around in the air, licking the ice cream off her lips as Amy entered the room.
"Amy!" Y/N and Charles exclaim, both still.
"Hi!"
"Hi, Amy!" Charles gulped as he leant off the island counter.
"Hi." Amy hesitated, as Y/N gave her a thumbs up. "Look, Charles, I just wanted to say thank you for getting Mac to sleep. I was being really stubborn earlier, and I guess what I'm trying to say is can I please have your nip tips?" She got to the point.
"You don't want my nip tips, those crusty old things." Charles waved it away as he scoffed.
"Oh, God, I can't be here for this." Rosa groaned as she covered her ears. "Oh, my mouth is so dry. It's all bad." She looked over into the distance.
"What's all bad?"
"I can't tell you, Amy." Rosa shot up.
"What can't you tell me?"
"It's too real. I need to leave." Rosa got herself off the cabinet and ran away.
~
Meanwhile, in the other room, Scully was sitting eating his chips as Rosa rushed in, "Damn it, I was looking for somewhere to be alone." She placed her hands in her black fleece pants.
"Sorry, I came out here looking for a signal to call Hitchcock, but no luck. I can take my chips and go." Scully gathered his chip bags and drink.
"Wait, you have chips? You could stay."
"Oh."
~
It was a bit later, Jake and Terry had now failed their mission--operation corn crake, leaving Kevin with swollen bee sting eye which made Holt angry. Meanwhile, inside, Y/N and Charles were still trying to find tools--also failing, whilst, nearby Rosa and Scully rate chips, "Okay, Barbecue." Rosa sat on a wooden stool as she swayed herself.
"Mm-hmm."
"Sweet Maui Onion, and the surprising underdog, Original." Rosa ranked, recalling all the flavors.
"I think I'm ready to crown a Chipeon."
"Chipeon? That's good."
"Yeah, I came up with it because I misspoke," Scully announced as Rosa laughed loudly as Amy walked into the room with a chuckle.
Amy exhaled, taking a seat. "Can I join you? Mac's never been asleep this long, and I don't know what to do with myself."
"Charles and Y/N locked your kid in the room."
"What?"
"You made me say it. If I didn't, you would've stayed here and ruined this good thing I got going with Scully and his chips." Rosa explained, tapping Scully with her foot.
"Wait, Mac is locked in a room?" Amy's face dropped. "Oh, my..." She rapidly left the room.
~
Upstairs, Y/N and Charles tried everything to get through to Mac, a hammer, a screwdriver, Rosa's axe, and other tools that were no luck, "This is so bad!" Y/N said through her teeth. "Here try hammering a screwdriver into the door?" She suggested, picking the two tools up.
"Good idea!" Charles pointed before getting to work as Amy thumps around the corner.
"Charles! Y/N!" Amy barked.
"Amy." Charles rose from the floor. "We were just doing a little handiwork, you know, fixing up the old house." He lied through his teeth with a chuckle as Y/N nodded along.
"I know you guys locked my son in there." Amy bellowed as her hands retreated to her hips.
"We're sorry. We tried everything." Charle's gave up, sulking. "Maybe he'll be happy growing up in that room." He shrugged.
"Oh, shut up, Charles!" Amy howled. "I'll get him out. Move." She shoved the two out of the way.
"I'm telling you, it's impossible."
"Not for his mother." Amy said before charging at the door, knocking it down making Mac cry from his crib.
"Wow!"
"Damn!"
~
It was now later that afternoon, the squad where all sat in the living room as they listened to Jake's speech on how he 'successfully' got Holt and Kevin back together. To him his Parent Trap scheme had worked. "They were being so sweet with each other and holding hands, it was amazing." He beamed, trailing to the end of the story. "They're totally back in love."
Holt steps into the room, "Peralta, I need to ask you something."
"Let me guess. Will I be the best man at a last-minute vow renewal ceremony that will serve as an emotional capper to this magical weekend?" Jake guessed as he spoke with his hands.
"No, I need you to move your car. Kevin has decided to leave immediately." Holt denied, hands on his hips.
"Kevin Cozner leaving the Lake House," Kevin declared as he closed the door behind him.
"This was 100% all Jake,"
"Oh, Terry."
~
A few hours had now passed at the lake house, or the tree house which Y/N calls it. The squad where sat around in the living room once again, but now eating dinner, "Amy, will you please pass the mini crab cakes?" Charles signaled. "Y/N and I want some."
"Are you sure you guys be trusted with something so small and delicate?" Amy pursed her lips as she rocked Mac.
"Amy, we're sorry!" Y/N face softened.
"I can tell you're upset, but you should know that I was locked in a room for 16 days as a child, and I turned out just fine."
"Dude, I was locked in a closet--" Y/N started before being interrupted by Amy.
"No, you didn't. Charles, you're a freak!" Amy's brows lift as she shook her head.
"Okay, I'm staying out of this one," Jake stated, rubbing his dirty hands on his pants.
"Shocking--I didn't realize you were capable of staying out of anything." Holt glared the boy down as Scully and Rosa wandered into the room.
"We have an announcement. We're here to crown the winner of this year's Great Tournament of Chips." Scully shined. "Rosa?"
"The Chipeon is... Smoky Bacon Chicken." Rosa closed her eyes as she swayed left to right.
"She's so high."
"Yeah. Sounds pretty good, though."
"Ugh, you guys are duds. Scully and I are gonna bounce." Rosa signaled a peace sign as she left the room as Scully bounced behind her.
"Oh, sir, that's a dribble cup." Jake signals to the red liquid leaking over Holt's top. "You're dripping on yourself."
"Am I?"
"Okay. Look, I'm really sorry."
"No need to apologize. Your Das Doppelte Lottchen scheme worked. You manufactured a perfect romantic moment, and I allowed myself to imagine, as Kevin held my hand, that he still felt something for me." Holt reminisced
When we came back, I walked him to his room, and just as I was working up the courage to ask him to stay, he said 'we shouldn't spend any more time together'. Well, at least now I know that my marriage is over." He takes a sip out of his cup which dribbles more. "So thank you, Peralta. Raymond Holt leaving the living room." The man announced as Jake stared downward, his face now flat.
~
It was now night, everyone was now in the designated rooms, Jake and Amy in one, nearby Y/N and Rosa shared, and lastly Terry and Charles bunked together, leaving Holt in his separate bedroom. "Hey, crazy what a good mood Mac is in." Jake watched his son sleep with a smile.
"You mean given the fact that he was locked in a prison by Charles and Y/N?" Amy huffed as she curled her hair with her finger.
"How long did he sleep?"
"You mean before he was rescued from the prison he was locked in by Charles and Y/N?"
"I guess."
"Three hours." Amy sighed with a grin.
"Whoa. What did they do?"
"You mean besides..." Amy trailed off as Jake join her as they synced "Locking him in a prison."
"Got it. I'll stop asking." Jake raised his hands. "Well, whatever he did, I'm loving his mood."
"Whatever."
"I still can't believe my scheme didn't work. Maybe if Y/N just agreed to be my Hallie to my Annie." Jake grunted. "I mean, we saw a corn crake and everything." The boy moped, placing his arms crossed over his chest.
"I know. What are the odds?"
"Right? I have to say, I don't see what the big deal is all about. This is what they actually look like." Jake pulled up a picture on his phone.
"Oh, that is not an attractive bird."
"I know! It's like a dumb duck! And this is what its call sounds like." Jake pressed play on the phone and it then made the bird call.
"Oh, it's horrible! It sounds like a taser." Amy scrunched her nose as Jake pulled his phone back in realization.
"No. It's wonderful. I have to go!"
~
Now, with Rosa being back to her normal state, and not high. She and Y/N were sitting in bed as they watched a movie. She sat behind Y/N, gently running her fingers through Y/N's hair as the woman watched. "Damn! Who gave you this movie?" Rosa kissed Y/N's shoulder.
"Amy. She keeps giving me her old stuff." Y/N groaned to the woman behind her. "Oh! Like, today, she said that we can have all of Mac's baby stuff when we have kids." She recalled, twisting around to now face Rosa. "It was so strange."
"Ha!" Rosa scoffed a laugh. "Straight people are awful." She mentioned, moving Y/N closer in by her waist.
"Yeah," Y/N whispered back before letting out a giggle at the small embrace Rosa held her in.
The two women then sat there in silence as they continued watching a bit more of the movie, "Wait. Y/N/N," Rosa spoke up before moving the girl to face her. "Would it be weird if we had one?"
"Rosa, why would we need another white noise mach--" Y/N started as Rosa stopped her in thought.
"No, a baby."
Y/N's wide-eyes gawk as her mouth gaped open, "Oh!" She delayed, her head jerked back in thought. "I mean..." She trailed off. "No. It would be weird." She decided, her brows slightly tightened. "I've always wanted to be a Mom."
"Hm."
"...Do you think us having a baby will be weird?"
Rosa stiffens her jaw in thought before looking back over to Y/N, "Babies are way too gross." She grimaced as Y/N let out a small chuckle which made Rosa smile. "But... if I had to choose to have a gross baby with someone, it would definitely be you." She rolled her eyes with a soft smile.
Y/N took a sharp intake of breath, her brows raise, "Ah!" She squealed, her hands in fists of excitement. "Really?"
"Yeah, we would have cute kids, it's fucked up."
"It is fucked up." Y/N agreed with a swift nod before being pulled in by her wife for a kiss, a kiss that broke apart for a second, making both girls smile at each other before leaning back in for more. Rosa's fingers gently slide down Y/N's face to her neck. "Don't be so rough. There can't be any marks." She whispered.
~
Meanwhile, Jake raced into Holt's bedroom, where he found the man in the center of his bed, his eyes closed and the lights on, "Sir?"
"What are you doing here, Peralta?" Holt opened his eyes.
"I wanna prove to you that you're wrong to think that Kevin doesn't have feelings for you anymore," Jake spoke with his hands.
"Okay. What is he doing here?" Holt's head signaled to Terry who leant on the door frame.
"Oh, I wanna prove to him that he was wrong for hedging all day. But that's our own separate thing, so you can ignore it." Jake shook his head. "Sir, listen. I think Kevin wanted to stay. The only reason he left is 'cause he didn't know how you felt."
"Why would you think that? He's made no effort whatsoever."
"Or has he? Did you know that Kevin is better at bird calls than you?"
"Oh, a strange, hurtful non sequitur."
"Now, who made the first corn crake call?"
"I believe I did."
"Correct. Kevin and I heard you, and he responded. But get this, sir. You made the wrong call. This is what a rooting corn crake sounds like." Jake played an audio clip of the bird from his phone. "The call you made was for a scarlet warbler. A trash bird." He chirped.
"Okay, so you made your point. I'm a trash man who only knows trash birds." Holt closed his eyes and exhaled.
"No, that is not my point. My point is, Kevin knew it wasn't a corn crake, but he went to it anyway." Jake elaborated as Holt's eyebrows knitted whilst he listened on.
"Because he was going to you, not the bird! He still loves you! Our plan worked!" Terry added before pointing to Jake beside him.
"Our plan?"
"Yeah! Terry is off the hedge and on the ledge!" Terry exclaimed.
"Well, that means a lot, coming from you Jeffords, given how much you hate ledges," Holt spoke up from his bed.
"People don't know about Terry hating ledges! This is new!"
~
It was now the next day, the squad where outside packing their belongings into cars as Charles and Y/N stroll up to Amy, "Hey, Amy, we wanted to give you this." Charles handed over the food. "We made Mac a truffle squash puree. We're not trying to show you how to do anything, we're just trying to apologize."
"Yeah, sorry Amy!" Y/N smiled. "The door wasn't meant to lock behind us.
"It's okay. I actually learned something from you guys yesterday. Mac has trouble sleeping because I bother him too much. When he was locked in that room no one could check on him, and it was the longest nap he's ever taken. So thank you for the mousse." Amy explained before putting the meal in the boot.
"I can't believe she actually took it," Charles muttered.
"Thought she was gonna dump it on us." Y/N squealed back.
"Of course I took it. You guys locked my baby in a room. You're gonna be cooking for him until he goes to college, okay?" Amy bellowed at the two.
"Sure."
"Okay."
"Great, thanks." Amy beamed.
~
Note:
Ian Gallagher has my heart.
Published: 15/04/23