I arrived at the Tisch School of Arts, NYU building and swallowed hard. I couldn't believe I was here. I couldn't believe I had auditioned. I couldn't believe I had been accepted. I didn't want to be an actress, I wanted to teach drama and theatre and I knew this was the best place to learn the art. To become the actress I was so reluctant to be so I could then in turn teach it to others.
I took a deep breath and pushed through the door, making my way to the small office where I was meant to check in. I checked in and gathered all the information I needed and I was told the tour would be self guided, with a chance to ask questions at the end.
I wandered through the building, it felt old, but homey almost. There were different class rooms, marked for dance, singing, acting etc. I read the brochure as I walked around explaining everything to me and I bit my lip at how perfect it really was for me. The schedule looked demanding. Only two days would be dedicated to general education, every other day would be long intense studio days. I knew I could strive off of that environment, but it still felt slightly intimidating.
After the tour I met with the admissions office and went over everything I may have questions about. The classes, the work load, how payments would work. Before I left, I signed my letter of intent to attend after my deferred year was over. It felt so official, and even if my parents said no, I had already committed. There was no turning back.
I left the school and glanced up at the Waverly Place street sign. I pulled my camera out and snapped a picture. This would be my street now. This was home. It felt so strange, but it felt right.
I wandered just down the street to Washington Square and sat on a bench going over everything in my mind when my phone went off. It was a message from Harry finally, and I quickly opened it up.
H: I hope it's going good baby. Everything is fine here. Louis is being extremely nice to everyone. Niall doesn't seem to know anything. I think we are in the clear. Don't worry too much about it, I have no regrets, and we will figure it out. I love you.
I smiled at the text and took in a big breath of relief that everything was just fine at rehearsal for the boys.
M: I'm glad my love. I'll see you soon, I love you.
—
The elevator dinged on our floor and I couldn't wait to just lay down on my bed and take a nap. I hardly slept the night before and I wanted to take advantage that the boys were still at rehearsal to relax.
The moment I made it to my room, I relaxed in the bed, almost immediately knocking out.
It felt like I had only been asleep five minutes when I heard a loud banging coming from the hall. I sat up quickly, and when the loud banging came again, it was followed by my brothers voice.
"Open up the bloody door Harry! Right fucking now!" He yelled and my heart caught in my throat. I quickly made my way to the door, but stopped before opening it as I heard Harry open his.
"Mate what the hell is your problem?" Harry said, sleep in his voice.
"Right now, it's you. You're supposed to be my fucking best mate, and I get this slipped under my door, with a note saying your sleeping with my fucking sister?! Why the hell are you kissing her in these pictures?" Niall yelled and I felt my heart fall into my stomach.
What pictures, what the hell, what pictures.
And then it dawned on me, the pictures I took of Harry and I in bed together, on our first date. I hadn't seen them when I was looking over my pictures in Louis' room. I had given Louis half the stack of pictures.
Oh no, oh no.
"Mate, look, I can explain we both can..."
And then I heard it, the sound of someone hitting a wall. I quickly opened the door and turned to Harry's room. On the floor were the pictures from that night, and pinned against the wall was Harry by my brother.
"Niall, what are you doing? Let him go." I yelled at him, the rest of the boys coming out into the hall.
"Macie get in your fucking room right now." Niall yelled at me.
"Not until you let him go Niall, let us explain. Please." I begged as the tears started in my eyes.
"Us? Us?!" He let go of Harry and marched over to me, he was so angry it was like he was hovering over me, "There is no us with you and him. Do you hear me? You stay the fuck away from him Macie! Both of you betrayed me!"
He was yelling at me at this point and Zayn was quickly by my side, then slipping between us, "Niall, back up and lower your voice before you do something you regret."
Harry approached from behind Niall, "Ni, please just let u—"
Before Harry could even get out another word, Niall punched him straight across the face causing Harry to fall back.
"Haz!" I yelled out pushing past Zayn and Niall, kneeling down next to Harry. His lower lip was bleeding, clearly having hit against his teeth and I glared up at Niall.
"Why do you always let your bloody temper win! Why can't you just listen for once!"
"Why should I listen when you lied to me! You couldn't even be honest with me, and then you come to me begging for help to pay for school." He yelled and I quickly stood up and got up in his face.
"I did not beg. I would never beg. I don't need nothing from you. I can figure it out all on my own, just like I can decide who I love all on my own." I said angrily, my voice matching his.
I saw Zayn's eyes widen out of the corner of my eye and I heard Harry getting up behind me, speaking calmly, "We didn't plan for this to happen, Niall. It just kinda did. We would never intentionally hurt you. We just didn't know how to tell you."
Niall's eyes shifted between the two of us, then ended on me, "You are going home tomorrow. I'm calling mum. Pack your things. You are no longer on this tour with us." He turned and started walking down the hall towards the elevator and I chased after him.
"Niall, please don't send me home please. Please just listen to me, please let me explain, please. Ni, I really love him, plea—Macie, you are going home. Leave me the fuck alone."
I bit my lip and cried as he kept walking and I turned back to face the boys. I looked over at Louis and shook my head, "I thought so highly of you. I tried so hard to protect you. To not hurt you. To be your friend, and you ruined everything. You didn't just come in between Haz and I, you came in between my education. I'm glad I didn't end up choosing you. End up liking you. You showed your true colors Louis, and I want nothing to do with you ever again."
I walked quickly past him and into Harry's arms. He pulled me close to him, kissing the top of my head, saying sorry over and over into my head.
I heard Zayn break the silence in the hall, "You really did that? You told Niall? Knowing how Niall is....what the fuck is wrong with you."
Soon Zayn and Liam made their way into their own room and Harry closed the door for his.
"I shouldn't be in here. I need to go to my room." I said trying to push away from Harry.
"Baby, Macie please don't push me away. We can figure this out. We will figure it out." I heard his plea, as he held me tight.
"Haz, everything is ruined, he'll never listen. He just won't." I cried into his arms and we stood there for five minutes in silence. The only thing to be heard was my cries.
He let go of me slightly, and lifted my chin to look at him, "Do you love me?"
I searched his eyes and nodded, "But Haz. I can't. I can't have my brother hating me."
"He'll get over it eventually Mace, with time."
I shook my head looking away from him, "Haz, I just, I think I need to go home. You need to finish the tour. And we just need to cool it for now."
"Macie, you can't mean that. Last night, this whole time. The break. The tour. Macie, I can't just let that go. I love you. I'm in love with you Macie." He said, his voice breaking slightly.
"Harry, I love you too. But, I don't know what else to do." I said, my tears starting again.
He quickly wiped the tears and turn my eye contact to him, "Try. Just try with me Macie."
I wanted too. As I looked at him, as I saw the pain in his eyes, I wanted too. It just didn't feel right. It didn't feel like the right choice. I meant what I said, about Niall not controlling who I loved, but I also never wanted to betray him. I didn't want my brother to hate me.
"Harry, baby, I think we just need to let it cool off a bit. Let everything just,....let everyone take a breather before—Macie. Please no."
I bit my lip and pulled away from him completely, "I don't want him to hate me. He's my only brother Haz. I just,....I...please don't make me choose."
"But you already did." He said softly, and I brought my hand to my mouth, to stop the ugly sound that wanted to leave me.
"Haz, I'm sorry." I turned and quickly left his room, unlocking my own and entering quickly. I slid down against the door until I was on the floor, and the tears just wouldn't stop. They just kept coming.