Colby's POV
"Goddamn it." I grumbled and went down the hallway. I knew Julia was going through something that was really intense but I didn't appreciate her acting like a child.
I didn't want her thinking she could talk to me like she was but I didn't want to scare her. She's been through a lot so I assumed she would be lashing out a lot.
It was true anyways, that this was my fault.
I didn't like that she was using it against me but I couldn't exactly blame her. It was an easy way to make me feel guilty.
"Why aren't you with Julia?" Sam asked as I rolled my eyes. "She had a hissy fit and spilled her soup all over herself." I said and held up the towel I had grabbed.
"She's not taking this very well is she?" Sam asked as I shook my head.
"Not at all." I said then turned to go back to the infirmary.
When I opened the door, Julia was standing in front of the cabinet with a pill bottle in her hand.
"Juliana!" I yelled causing her to turn around. Her eyes were full of joy as pills poked out of her mouth from how many were in there.
I clenched my jaw then rushed over to her, grabbing her by her neck and pinning her against the wall.
"Spit them out NOW." I growled as fear filled her once joyful eyes. "NOW. Right fucking now." I demanded and held my free hand out in front of her mouth.
Julia shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes. I knew she would struggle but this was really fucking intense for her.
"Juliana. NOW!" I screamed and jolted her, causing her to open her mouth. She must have had at least twenty pills in her mouth because my palm was filled with the slobbery pills by the time her mouth was empty.
"You can't fucking do that." I said then let go of her and snatched the empty pill bottle.
It was Vicodin.
Great.
"I need them." She whispered with so much need it broke my heart.
She genuinely thought she needed these pills.
"It's all in your head, Jules. Your brain needs them but you don't." I explained with a little more of a gentle tone.
I didn't want to scare her but I needed to get my point across that she couldn't hurt herself like this.
She looked at me for a second before she burst into tears.
"I-I-I'm s-sorry!" She choked out as I sighed and hugged her. "I just care about you and don't want you going further down this path." I said and rubbed her back.
She was weak from what had happened to her so she collapsed, sobbing into me.
"Shhh...just don't do that shit. You can't do that." I said then picked her up and carried her to the bed.
"I just...I..I need it." She sobbed out. I felt anger boil inside of me but it wasn't towards Julia. It was towards those fucking idiots that took her.
They made her life even worse than it was before. She had been through so much in her life and addiction was the last thing she needed.
Once she was sitting again I put the pills that were in my hand and put them in the empty bottle.
I noted that I needed to have someone be with her at all times, even if it's only for a minute.
"Please don't hate me." Julia whispered with a broken tone.
"I could never hate you, sweetheart. Why would you think that?" I asked and texted Sam so he could come dispose of these pills.
"I was being mean." She said and looked up at me. Her eyes were bloodshot and her nose was red.
"You aren't really yourself right now and I understand that." I said as the door opened. "Flush these." I said then handed the bottle to Sam.
"You got it. How are you feeling, Jules?" Sam asked causing Julia to burst into tears again. "Shit." Sam said as I went over to the bed and wrapped my arms around her.
"She's a little emotional right now." I said as she turned her face into my chest and sobbed.
"Totally understandable. Love you, Jules." Sam said then ducked out of the room.
"Shhh..." I shushed and scratched her back. She was trembling again which broke my heart.
I knew with addiction and trauma there were going to be intense mood swings.
Julia wasn't going to be nice and she was going to go behind my back go get what she needed and wanted.
I wasn't going to let her get her way though.
She was going to get through this even if it was the last thing I did.
I could feel the looming presence of Quill around me.
I was an idiot if I thought he didn't catch on to what happened. He had to know that his daughter was in an extreme amount of trouble right now.
That meant I was in even more trouble.
"Colby?" Julia asked looking up at me. "Yes, darling?" I asked and looked down at her. "You're kinda squishing me." She said quietly.
"Shit. Sorry." I mumbled, realizing I was holding onto her like she was slipping away.
"You should get some rest." I said and loosened my grip on her. "I feel like I'm vibrating." She said and trembled into me.
"How often did they give you those drugs?" I asked quietly. "Often." She said with a sigh. "Great." I said sarcastically.
"You're going to go through so bad withdrawals. It's going to suck but we're gonna get you through it. Do you trust me?" I asked as she sniffled and looked up at me.
"I don't want to be like this." She said then sniffled.
"I know. I know this is going to be hard for us but in a couple of weeks you'll hopefully feel more normal." I said as she nodded.
"I'm sorry in advance." She said then nuzzled her face in my chest.
"Don't worry about any of that. I love you and want you to be okay." I said causing her eyes to widen and her to look up at me.
"What?" I asked with confusion. "You said you love me." She said quietly as I chuckled.
"Wasn't it obvious?" I asked and brushed her hair behind her ear.
"You've just never said." She said as I nodded. "But I mean it." I said then kissed her forehead.
I had never told a girl I loved her before and I honestly was waiting for a special moment to say it to Julia but it just slipped out.
I needed her to know that I was here for her through this and that I truly did love her and wanted her to be okay.
"I love you, too." She said quietly after a moment of silence. "I know, sweetheart." I said then kissed her.
"Try to get some rest." I said and rubbed her arm gently. She nodded and closed her eyes, letting herself melt into me more.
I don't think she ever fell asleep though because she was trembling so bad. I noticed that she was starting to get clammy too which meant her withdrawal was getting stronger.
I had surprisingly never dealt with addiction or anyone who had it, but I knew that it really fucked you up.
I knew that when it was bad, she would do anything to get her fix but I wasn't going to let her.
I would stay up all night every night for the rest of her recovery if I had to.
We would always have someone with her to watch her so she wouldn't fall back.
I hoped after a while that she wouldn't feel dependent on drugs to get away from the feelings she was having.
We would fill her life with real joy and love so that she wouldn't feel like she needed substances.
Nobody would hurt her or make her feel threatened.
I knew that I would have to worry about Quill and would have to continue running the gang but Julia was more important than both of those things.
I would never be able to live with myself if she succumbed to her addiction.
I ended up staying up all night, making sure Julia stayed with me. It felt weird having to babysit her like this but right now she was sort of in a childlike state.
She didn't know what was right and wrong and her emotions were completely fucked.
I had to have patience for her right now but I wasn't going to tolerate her hurting herself.