CHAPTER 26: FAMILY
Noah glanced up from where he was adding wood to the fireplace when the bathroom door opened, Lucius walking out rubbing his hair with a towel in an attempt to dry it. "Feeling better?" Noah asked.
Lucius gave him a small smile as he nodded, going to the dresser and grabbing his comb, running it through his still wet hair before he looked back at him, asking, "Is dinner ready?"
"Dry your hair well first. You will catch a cold." Noah mumbled, walking towards him and grabbing the towel tossed aside before rubbing Lucius's hair a bit more.
"I'm hungry." Lucius complained, trying to get Noah's hands off of his hair, "Look what you did! It's a mess."
Noah chuckled saying, "Lazarus called for us a while ago, but you were still bathing."
"Let's go."
"You'll get the kids?" Noah asked.
Lucius nodded, heading out the room and to the one two doors away, knocking before opening it to see Cole sitting on the window ledge, protected from the wind outside by the closed doors of it. He glanced to the bed, seeing Benjie laying down, holding his hands in the air and seeming to draw invisible images. Mel was running around the room, stopping every time she thought she saw something interesting, but when she turned around and saw Lucius, she ran to him, yelling "Micah!!"
"Mel!" He exclaimed back, picking her up the moment she got to him, "Are you guys hungry? Dinner is ready."
"Cole's stomach was making sounds-..."
"Mel!" Cole said, making her giggle as he blushed, getting off of the window seat and heading to them, "Come on, Ben." He said, holding his hand out to his brother who hurried to take his brother's hand. Lucius put Mel down, only for Cole to hold her hand in his free one before looking at Lucius, saying, "Lead the way."
"Alright." Lucius nodded, walking in front of them until they reached the kitchen. Lucius went to Noah's side, watching the kids find empty seats and sitting beside each other on the other end of the table, away from everyone else. Lucius introduced them to everyone before he asked Wyatt, who was closest to them to pass them some of the food. Worried, Lucius's eyes kept glancing towards them, before finally deciding to move from his place. He pecked the side of Noah's lips as he got up, picking up his plate with him and going to where Cole sat with his brother and sister on either side of him. He settled down beside Mel, offering her some more food as conversations went around the table. Finally he picked her up, placing her in his lap and feeding her from his own plate.
"Can you please put her down?" Cole said when Lucius had picked her up.
"Why? She's finally eating without fussing."
"Hand her to me." Cole insisted, his mind filled with different reasons of why it was a bad idea for them to be so close.
"Cole, she is fine. Let her be." Lucius said, tickling her and making her giggle before holding another spoon to her lips, telling her to open wide.
"I said give her to me!" Cole insisted, his voice louder making everyone in the room go silent and turn their attention to him, "She is my sister! I decide!"
Lucius frowned, but didn't fight him when Mel herself reached for her brother, who took her back, holding her in his arms as she started crying at his tone, burying her face in his neck. "I didn't mean any harm, Cole. I was just trying to help." Lucius said quietly.
"Keep your help to yourself! I don't need it. We don't need it." Cole got up, grabbing Benjie's arm and pulling him alone as he declared, "This goes for the rest of you as well. No one, and I mean no one touches them." He then added, "We are done. Thank you for the dinner." With that he dragged them both with him, Mel clinging to his neck as he carried her outside the kitchen and back the way they came to their room.
"That brat needs to be taught a lesson in manners." Tobias said.
"Thought so too." Lorena said. Lucius gulped, his eyes dropping before he got to his feet, grabbing their plates and going to the kitchen counter.
"They need time." Noah muttered from his side as Lucius fussed about the kitchen.
"I know." Lucius mumbled.
"It's not your fault." Noah said, seeing Lucius nod. He finally stopped him, grabbing his arm and looking him in the eyes as he said, "They will be fine." Lucius sighed, placing the bowel he'd grabbed on the counter before wrapping his arms around Noah who held him tightly against himself.
"I'll be patient."
"So what are you doing?" Noah asked.
"They didn't finish eating." Lucius answered, letting go of him before grabbing a tray and starting to place everything on it.
Noah chuckled, seeing Lucius look at him with confusion made him say, "So much for being patient."
Lucius smiled at him, saying, "I have to take care of them like I promised."
"Want me to come with you?"
"I don't want him to panic again. I better go alone, try and talk to him. He is very protective of them."
"That is actually a good thing." Noah said.
"It's a great thing." Lucius agreed, "He's kept them safe."
"That is true." Noah kissed the top of Lucius's head before returning to the table as Lucius picked up the tray and headed to the door.
He went to their room, knocking on it before opening it with his elbow, making Cole look up at him with a frown. He was in the same spot from earlier on the window seat, but this time Mel was in his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck. Ben, who was as quiet as usual sat at his feet, his cheek against his brother's leg as his finger traced patterns on the carpet.
"What do you want?" Cole asked, "And I want a key to the door."
"Cole, I didn't mean to upset you earlier." Lucius said.
"You didn't upset me." Cole said stubbornly.
"Will you listen for a second?" Lucius asked, placing the tray on the low table beside the couch before going to the window, pretending not to notice how Cole pulled Mel closer, pressing himself further to one side of the window as Lucius sat opposite him on the other. "I know you are still scared."
"I am not." Cole said.
"It is alright to be." Lucius insisted, "I was terrified when I first got here. Not knowing who to trust, but I was sure I could trust Noah, so I did. It took me some time, even with Noah around. I was still scared. I couldn't sleep without nightmares. I never told anyone for years about what happened to me. They always thought that the tears and restless nights were because my father was dead. I didn't understand it fully, so I never spoke about it." Lucius reached a hand towards Cole, touching his knee and watching him try to hide a grimace, making Lucius withdraw his hand as he added, "Cole, it's not easy, I know. But when I tell you to trust me, don't just do it because we are blood, because you and I know how treacherous family could be. Do it because you know that after everything we went through, we would never dare do such a thing to another soul."
"I can't help how I act." Cole said, "It's impulse. To protect these two I would do anything. I know that my mind is playing tricks on me. That I am seeing things that are not there, imagining evil where there isn't, but I can't risk it. Trust has gotten me nowhere thus far. I don't want to regret something that I could have stopped."
"I understand where you are coming from, but you can't live like this forever." Lucius said, "I am not telling you not to be cautious, but don't forbid yourself from living because you are afraid. I came here when I was 12, and I was met with nothing but kindness. I chose to love Noah. I chose to be with him only two years ago. I got to decide that. You will too. When you want to love, you will choose who you love. When you want someone in your life, when you are ready for it, you will be the one to choose. Nothing will be forced on you. Never again, I will make sure of it."
Cole merely stared at him for a long time before he finally said, "He's dead, isn't he."
It took Lucius a moment to realize who Cole meant before he nodded, "After what he did, I couldn't allow him to live. To do this to more innocent children. Hate me if you want, Cole, I can live with that, but not with allowing a monster to live on."
Cole looked away, placing his head against Mel's as he muttered, "I don't know how I feel about that."
"You don't need to figure everything out now." Lucius said.
"It was Noah who did it, wasn't it?" Cole asked.
"Yes. But I didn't stop him." Lucius said, not wanting all the blame to be on Noah.
"Thank you for helping us leave there. I would have never done it without you. I was starting to give up. I really was. I was starting to think of other ways to leave there. With both of them..." Cole said, his hand landing on Benjie's head, making his big eyes look up at him before going back to what he was drawing with his fingers.
Lucius frowned, wondering what he referred to which had him ask, "What do you mean?"
"I couldn't leave without them. I couldn't support them if we did leave. Where would we go? What would we have done to survive?" Cole asked, looking at Lucius and just like when he met him, his eyes were tearful but his stubbornness didn't allow him to cry as he said, "So there was really one other option to get us three out of there without actually leaving."
Lucius's eyes grew sad as he muttered, "Oh, Cole..."
"I found some of the red leaves growing on the way from school. The same one's father used. Mother didn't suffer. It didn't take long actually. I was going to give it to them before bed, tuck them in, and wish them goodnight before I drank some myself." Cole spoke, "I had them hidden in a drawer for the past two weeks, trying to get the courage to finally do it."
Lucius held his hand out to Cole, making the boy look at it with question before Lucius said, "Please. Only a bit. I know you don't want to be held, so please indulge me." Cole hesitated before reaching over, taking Lucius's hand in his hesitantly. Lucius noticed how Cole avoided looking him in the eyes as their hands touched, asking him to do so and when he did, he said, "I will never hurt you in that way I promise. Not you, and not Mel and Benjie. I will protect you with my life." It took Cole a moment before he nodded, making Lucius add, "and if anything were to ever happen to me at any point, you can take my word for it, there is no one more trustworthy than Noah, or any of the others in this house. They will look out for you like you were family. They will protect you." Cole gulped, making Lucius give him a small smile as he said, "You will see it for yourself, and when you do, you will understand what I am talking about. So I'll leave you to finish your dinner. Make sure they eat all of it as well. I will come to check on you a little later."
As Lucius got up, Cole said, "The keys." Lucius turned back to face him as he repeated, "I do trust you, but not yet them. So I want the room keys."
"They were in the door lock. That is odd." Lucius said with a frown.
"That girl... Lena I think? She was yelling about something I said and on her way out she took it. She said until I learn to be respectful she will not return it. I want it back." Cole insisted.
Lucius groaned, letting his head drop backwards in frustration before he headed to the door and started calling out, "Lorena! You better get your ass here now!"
"Will everyone stop yelling?!" she called back from the Living Room down the stairs when he called her name louder a few more times. She went up, seeing Lucius standing near the door waiting for her. "What?"
"The keys." Lucius demanded, holding his hand out.
"To the room?"
"Yes, to the room." Lucius said in anger.
"Not happening." Lorena said.
"Why not?"
"He didn't apologize." She said simply.
"What for?" Lucius asked.
"He knows what for." Lorena said, glancing into the room.
"I didn't say anything wrong!" Cole insisted.
"Then what did you mean by saying that I don't look like a warrior?" She demanded.
"That you are a girl!" Cole said, "That you are gentle!"
"I will show you gentle you damn brat!" She said, about to go into the room and fight him when Lucius grabbed her.
"Lorena, I swear if you don't give it to me now you will regret it." Lucius said, making her look at him with confusion.
"You are taking his side? What, you also think that girls are not worthy of being warriors?"
"Lorena, he is ten. He didn't live in the world we once did. It is not even worth the reaction you are having."
"I am sorry, alright!" Cole said, making Lucius glance at him, getting angrier that Cole seemed to force himself to say the words, "Just give them back. I will not speak to you that way if you just give them back."
"Now give it to me." Lucius said.
She stepped back, folding her arms as she said, "No."
"Lorena, I am not in a joking mood."
"Then tell me why he needs the key?" she arched an eyebrow.
"It is none of your business." Lucius said.
"If you want the key, then it is." Lorena insisted.
"Lorena, enough." She turned around to see Lazarus standing there, glaring at her, daring her to argue. She sighed dramatically as she pulled out the keys, handing them to Lucius who grabbed her hand.
"Don't ever, and I mean ever do such a thing. And if you will act this way, stay away from him. He doesn't need this and he's been through too much to have to deal with it." Lucius hissed at her before letting go of her hand, walking up to Cole and giving him the key.
"Thank you." Cole said. Lucius gave him a soft smile before walking out of there, closing the door behind himself.
"Is he alright?" Lazarus asked.
"Eventually he will be." Lucius said, giving him a weak smile before glancing towards the stairs as he asked, "Where is Noah?"
"They are all gathered downstairs." Lorena said, "Come join us."
"Lazarus?" Lucius asked him as he glanced towards him.
"I am feeling tired. I will head to bed. Don't be up too late though, tomorrow we will resume training." Lazarus said as he headed down the hall.
"Good night." Lucius said as he went with Lorena to the living room, his eyes landing on Noah before he made his way to him, plumping next to him and leaning against him. Noah didn't hesitate in wrapping his arms around him, holding him close as he placed a chaste kiss against his temple.
"Everything alright with the kids?" Noah asked, making Lucius nod.
"So, what are you guys doing?" Lucius asked aloud, making Blayth glance at him.
"It's a game. To find out more about each other." Blayth said, grabbing his glass of scotch and taking a sip, "Each time one asks a question and we all answer it."
"If we don't want to?" Lucius asked.
"Ah, that is the challenge, game part of it. We all have to." Tobias said, winking at him as he brought a glass of wine to Edmur before settling beside him.
"What if I wasn't willing to answer?" Lucius asked with a raised eyebrow.
"You have to." He repeated.
"Don't worry." Noah muttered to him, settling down comfortably on the couch with Lucius between his legs as they both lay on it, Noah's back comfortable against the side rest with Lucius held close to his chest. "It won't be anything difficult."
Lucius hesitated before nodding, hearing Cylus ask, "So what is it you are trying to hide?"
"Nothing." Lucius said, glaring at him, "Just wondering what kind of questions."
"Let's start and you will find out." Blayth said, "Your worst fear. Cylus, you start."
"Wyatt." Cylus answered, making the mage look at him with a small frown from where he knelt at his feet, feeling Cylus's hand in his hair as their eyes met. Cylus chuckled before saying, "Not like that. I am afraid of you realizing that I am not good enough for you."
"Never." Wyatt said, shaking his head, "No one is like you." Cylus smiled at him. Even though he heard the words, and trusted him with all his heart, there was no denying that losing Wyatt was the thing that scared him the most.
"It is true when they say love is the greatest weakness." Tobias said with a small smile, feeling Edmur's hand slip in his.
"How about you, Toby?" Blayth asked.
Tobias thought about it for a moment before saying, "I would say the same thing..." Tobias then chuckled, his hand tightening around Edmur's as he said instead, "But we are trying to know more about each other and that much we know about almost everyone here. So my second greatest fear would be the dark."
"You're scared of the dark?" Blayth asked.
Tobias shrugged, saying, "Well, things happen."
"And you, Ed?"
"My visions." Edmur said, a smile following as he said, "Not a secret though. So I'd pick getting hurt."
"Valid fear. Leon?" Blayth said.
"I didn't say I would join the game." Leon muttered.
"Come on, Leon. We are all doing it." Cylus encouraged.
Leon was quiet for a while, as if considering it before he said, "Love."
"Elaborate." Blayth said with a raised eyebrow, making Leon roll his eyes.
"I don't like what I don't understand." Leon said.
"Which part don't you understand?" Blayth questioned.
Leon let out a breath of a laugh before grabbing the back of Blayth's neck, pulling him in for a deep, demanding kiss before he said, "Definitely not this part. Wyatt, it's your turn."
"Letting people down."
"And spiders." Cylus said, making Wyatt shiver in disgust.
"And that." Cylus chuckled at Wyatt's words.
"Blayth?" Leon asked, wanting to keep his mind off of his earlier confession of his fear of love.
"I don't know." Blayth said with a shrug.
"Blayth, you made me say it, so now it is your turn." Leon glared.
"I really don't know." Blayth repeated, "What? I am not joking. I can't remember a thing I am actually afraid of."
"Bugs?" Cylus hinted, making Blayth shake his head.
"Snakes?" Lorena asked, but again he shook his head.
"I actually love snakes." He said, making them all laugh, remembering how he loved all dangerous animals.
"Then how about something already said? Like the dark, getting hurt, or love?" Tobias insisted.
"No. None." He shook his head.
"Not once were you afraid?" Leon asked.
Blayth frowned before turning to him, thinking for a moment before saying, "When I was a child, maybe. But nothing now."
"Moving on." Tobias said with a laugh, "Noah?"
"You already know my fear." Noah said, his arm tightening around Lucius.
"Ren?" Blayth asked.
"Losing one of you." She said, shaking her head as if to rid herself of that thought.
"I guess that could be a fear of mine." Blayth agreed, "Perhaps all of us. Ira?"
"Falling in love." She said, "I agree with Leon on that one."
"You guys will have to explain that one to me. Logan?" Blayth asked, turning to the quiet man sitting beside his dragon.
"Warriors have no fears." Logan said simply, making Blayth give him a deadpan look.
"He's from an older generation." Tobias supplied, "They don't like sharing feelings."
"You must have one fear." Blayth insisted.
"Look who's talking." Lorena snorted.
"The gates." Atrabilious said in his stead.
"Ray, I've told you not to share my thoughts." Logan scolded, "Besides, I don't fear them. I dread ending up in them again."
"It does sound like a horrible place." Cylus said.
"It doesn't matter anymore. I am out." Logan replied.
"How about you, Atrabilious?" Blayth asked.
"I am the most powerful beast in this world. What would I fear?" Atrabilious replied simply.
"Not too modest either." Lorena chuckled, "You, Liam?"
"Failing at what I have been tasked with. One of your lives ending on my watch." Liam said with a weak smile.
"That is not on you." Edmur shook his head, "Fate decides who gets to live or die. You merely help it keep us alive if we were meant to." Liam looked at him for a long moment before nodding.
"Lucius, you're the only one left." Blayth said.
"The future." Lucius answered.
"What's so scary about that?" Blayth wondered.
"Because you never know what will happen. We have all those hopes, dreams. We plan our lives, think of where we want them to end, but then you don't really know, do you? For me, I don't know if I will live another day. I don't know if I would return and find all of you still here, or if Noah would still wait for me."
"Always." Noah assured.
"You don't know. People's feelings change. Things change. I hate change, and I fear the future." Lucius replied.
"How about we change the question? It is getting too serious." Tobias said, "We find out how much we already know about each other. Blayth's favorite food?"
"Fried chicken." Almost instantly everyone answered, starting to laugh.
"Lucius?" Tobias asked.
"Strawberries." Again everyone answered.
"Noah?"
"He eats everything." Lorena said, making everyone laugh.
"Stake." Lucius replied, "Medium rare. It's his favorite." Noah smiled, holding him closer.
"Now that you mention it..." Lorena said, chuckling, "He does enjoy it more than anything else."
"How about Ren?" Lucius asked, "I would say corn."
"Nah, she lives for her father's curry." Blayth argued, "Damn he's a good cook."
"Years of practice." Leon chuckled, throwing an arm around Blayth's neck as he leaned back against the couch.
"Not even close." She shook her head.
"Pasta." Liam said, laughing as she looked at him, "She loves pasta. She looks as if she's in heaven when she's eating it."
"Liam, that is disturbing." Blayth accused with an arch eyebrow making the man blush.
"Not what I meant, Blayth." Liam scolded.
"Ignore him." Lorena said, looking away with a light blush as well, trying to hide it with the glass she was sipping from.
Blayth sat up suddenly, staring between the two before he demanded, "Wait a minute. Ren, tell me now. Are you two-...?"
"No!" She stated, glaring at Blayth.
"Ren, don't lie." He glared back, "You would've been the one saying these sorts of things otherwise. Tell the truth." He said.
"Stay out of it. It is none of your business." She spat.
"Lorena Able, What the hell?! I am always the first to hear about these things! Why didn't you tell me?!" Blayth demanded.
"There is nothing to tell. Besides, have you forgotten how you failed to mention your thing with Leon?" She asked with an arched eyebrow.
"We'll get back to that. Now fess up!" He insisted, "Since when have you been-...?"
"We haven't been anything." Lorena glared.
"Liam, you sneaky bastard." Blayth said, turning back to him, "Tell me everything."
"As she said, there is nothing to tell." Liam said.
"Liam." Noah said in a firm voice, making the healer turn to him as he asked, "Are you sleeping with my sister?"
"Noah!" Lorena exclaimed, her face turning red.
"Stay out of it." Lucius said, hitting him against his thigh, "She's a grown woman. She gets to do what she wants."
"Thank you." Lorena said before glaring at Noah, "It is none of your business. And we are not!"
"I can tell when you are lying, sister." Noah glared before looking Liam dead in the eyes as he said, "If you touch her, I will kill you."
"The hell?" Lucius sat up, glaring at him, "It is not up to you."
"Don't interfere." Noah told him.
"You shouldn't interfere. It's her life. You don't get to decide who she ends up with or who she loves."
"I am her brother." Noah stated.
"And Lazarus was your father when he told us we are not allowed to be together." Lucius countered, "Did you think he was right when he did that?" Lucius demanded. Noah merely stared at him, not replying which made Lucius stand up saying, "Really?"
"I am not talking about us." Noah countered.
"It was the same thing."
"No it wasn't." Noah shook his head, "You were a prince. We are both men. It wasn't the same thing. He didn't want us to be together for valid reasons."
"And what valid reason do you have for not wanting them to be together?" Lucius asked him.
"Because she is my sister. I will not let her get involved with someone who is not right for her." Noah stated.
"First of all, Liam is a great man. Second of all, you are not one to decide who is right for her." Lucius argued.
"Guys, will you stop fighting over my life?" Lorena grumbled.
"Noah, we aren't living in the stone ages where a brother decides who his sister ends up with. She has as much of a voice as you do." Lucius proclaimed.
"She is still a girl." Noah argued.
"She would be dead ten times over if we'd lived without immortality. She is not a girl. She's a thousand something years old." Lucius insisted.
"This is a matter between my sister and me. Why are you getting so upset over it?" Noah glared.
"Because I won't stand for anyone belittling her!" Lucius argued, "I know what she went through as a princess, it was worse than being a prince, and I won't stand for making her go through something like that ever again. So lay off!"
"It is not up to you." Noah said.
"It is not up to you either. Like it was not up to our fathers to decide our lives." Lucius said, "Because if they did, we wouldn't be here right now. Perhaps what they will have will be the best relationship. So think about it. Until you figure that one out, I'll be staying in the guest room."
"Lucius, don't be absurd." Noah rolled his eyes.
"Listen to yourself, idiot. I am not the one spouting nonsense." Lucius grumbled as he started walking to the stairs.
Ren watched him leave before glaring at Blayth, getting up as she tossed a pillow at him, saying, "You started this." With that she followed Lucius, Blayth placing his glass down and going after them as well.
"So much for playing." Tobias let out a soft laugh as he took another sip, Liam as well leaving the room, heading to his infirmary to avoid Noah.
"Lucius was right though." Ira said, glancing at Noah, "You have no right telling her who she could be with and who she couldn't."
"Oh, shut it." Noah said, getting up as well, "All of you. I get to state my opinion."
"Not demand it." Ira said with an arched eyebrow.
"She is still my sister, and I will protect her."
"Be grateful if she ends up with an immortal, with one you know closely. You would have a hard time dealing with her if she had a broken heart, because you would be the one she goes to. You are her brother after all." She said sarcastically the words he'd repeated, "At least with Liam you wouldn't have to worry about him dying of old age, or getting in harm's way in battle. You know him to be a man of integrity, who has a good heart. Someone who cares for all of us. So think about how he would take care of someone he loves. If you ask me, there is no better man I see for her. She deserves the best, and he is the best."
"No one asked you." He said after a moment, even though her words did make sense to him, he wasn't ready to see Ren with someone almost on a daily basis.
"Do what you want, but think of how this will affect your relationship with your sister. You don't want to push her away, you want to keep her near you to be able to keep her safe. I know you, Noah. So make sure to use that mind of yours before doing anything stupid like when you put yourself under that damn sleeping spell." He huffed as he left the living room, heading to his own as he ignored her words.
"Thanks for that, but I could handle myself." Lorena said as she walked into Lucius and Noah's room, watching him pick a few things before starting to head to the door.
Lucius rolled his eyes as he said, "Yeah, yeah. I didn't only do it for you, he was pissing me off."
As he walked out, Blayth was coming towards his room, following Lucius down the hall to where he was headed. The guest room a bit further down the hall. "So, didn't mean to start that."
"You've always been a blabbermouth." Lucius muttered, entering the room with the two following him.
"He's right." Lorena told Blayth, "You could be so annoying."
"You never answered me." Blayth said, whining when she slapped him upside the head.
"It's none of your business." She insisted, "You guys were awful. Liam must feel horrible right now."
"You should've gone to check on him instead of following me." Lucius said, taking off his shirt before starting to wear the one he had in his hands.
"Wanted to make sure you were alright. You know, since you just almost ended things with Noah because of me. Seriously, Lucius, what were you thinking?"
"I was thinking about you. Stop being an idiot like your bother." Lucius scolded before going to the bathroom and changing the rest of his clothes, only to return to Lorena sitting on the bed. He rolled his eyes again as he made his way there, pulling the blanket back and slipping under it. Soon Blayth and Lorena were on either side of him. "Will you let me sleep in peace?" Lucius asked.
"No way." Blayth said.
"Besides, only this afternoon you were yelling in the living room, breaking down in front of Lazarus." Lorena said, "We have to make sure you are alright."
"I'm fine if you don't mention that again."
"So you aren't going to tell us?" Lorena asked, making Lucius frown, looking down at his hands.
"I... No. It's not something I like talking about, so don't ask." Lucius said, sighing.
Blayth sat up, turning around to face Lucius as he said, "Hey, you don't have to tell us anything." He brought his hand to Lucius's shoulder, squeezing it as he added, "But we are here. Whatever you need, we are always here for you."
Lucius tried not to flinch away, smiling he kept his eyes from looking into Blayth's while he raised his hand, moving Blayth's from his shoulder as he said, "I know that."
"Are you alright?" Blayth wondered, taking his hand back, wondering why Lucius seemed to be bothered by the simple touch.
"Fine. Just want to be alone for a bit." Lucius said, "It's been a long few days."
"Alright." Blayth nodded.
"Ren, what I said earlier, I meant it. Don't bother Cole." Lucius reminded her, much gentler than his earlier threat.
She frowned for a moment before mumbling, "I won't. I promise."
"Thank you." he said, and a bit later the two left the room. He lay down, closing his eyes as he pulled the covers over his head preparing to sleep, but no matter how much he tried, it kept eluding him. His mind kept going back to everything that happened that day. With Cole, his uncle, and Lazarus. He hated the events of the day, shuddering at the thought of them before he felt choked as he recalled how he told Noah to kill the man. He never wished to harm anyone. Never wished to kill anyone but at that moment he felt his entire being ache, not only for himself but his cousin as well.
It felt like hours when he felt himself being pulled into a light slumber, with tears still trailing down his cheeks, being woken up by the sound of the door opening. He tensed, feeling the bed dip behind him before an arm came around his waist, making his heart pound faster in his chest. Lips touched the skin of his neck, causing a choked sob to leave him when he felt the bond send shivers through his body, making him know it was Noah.
"Lu, it's me..." Noah whispered, holding him close, "Are you alright?"
Lucius sniffled, turning around and burying his face against Noah's chest, wrapping his arms around him. "Why are you here?" Lucius whimpered.
"I couldn't sleep. I feel what you feel, remember?" Noah mumbled, tilting his head against Lucius's, a hand tangling in his hair as he added, "The room feels so empty without you, love."
"I feel horrible..." Lucius sobbed, latching onto Noah.
"There is nothing to make you feel that way." Noah muttered.
"It doesn't change the facts... I feel ill thinking about what we did..."
"We did nothing. I killed him." Noah said, understanding Lucius's thoughts.
"I still let you-..."
"I would've done it even if you didn't want me to." Noah cut him off.
Lucius trembled, gripping onto Noah, "Even so... knowing I didn't even try..."
"He deserved it."
"That's what makes it worse. Because even though I know it was wrong, I still believe he deserved it." Lucius whimpered, "I hate feeling this way..."
"Lu, try to forget what you feel for a moment. Focus on our bond. Reach for it. Feel me instead." Noah whispered, taking in a deep breath and focusing on his love for Lucius, just like he'd done the day before in the hotel when Lucius had lost himself in his memories. "I am here."