It was almost three in the morning. Meredith shivered as she hurried across the parking lot towards the front doors of the hospital. She had awoken alone about forty minutes before, and had discovered a message on her cell phone from Derek, telling her he wouldn't make it home. She must have slept right through his call. After spending the previous night on call and working all of the previous day, Meredith had forgone waiting for Derek to finish his emergency surgery and had allowed Izzy to drive her home. After a quick shower, she had collapsed onto her bed and fallen asleep, wet hair and all, expecting to wake up to him collapsing beside her some time in the next few hours.
But his patient had been critically injured. And a set of burr holes hadn't done enough to elude the pressure. So he had been forced to stay into the night, removing clot after clot. His message had told her if he wasn't home it was because his patient was still alive and he would be sleeping at the hospital, ready to go back into surgery at any moment.
He had referred to her house as home. It had been three weeks since she had officially asked him to move in with her, but the term, rolling off of his lips with such ease, still gave her goose bumps.
Meredith reached the front doors and shivered as she stepped inside, the blast of warm air clueing her body in to just how cold it had been outside. There was only one family in the waiting room, sprawled across the uncomfortable chairs. Meredith wondered if they belonged to Derek's patient.
She quickly made her way through the lobby to the elevators, shifting her shoulder bag up along her shoulder so it wouldn't fall. She had been planning this day for some time. And she wasn't about to let him being stuck at the hospital all night throw her off track. It was going to be special.
She had never been in this position before, so she had no idea what was expected from her. And when she had asked, he had only told her one thing.
'All I want is to wake up next to you in the morning and fall asleep next to you at the end of the day.'
And if that was what he wanted, that was what he was going to get. She quickly made her way to the intern locker room and stashed her bag, hoping everything would stay good for lunch. And she changed into her scrubs; they would be more comfortable to sleep in than jeans and a sweater.
The first on-call room she tried was full, and Meredith almost laughed at the sight of Alex snoring away on the lower bunk. The second one was where she found the man she was looking for. Thankfully, the other bed was empty. The highlight to being an attending was that residents and interns tried not to disturb your sleep, so they often opted to pile into the same rooms with each other and leave you be. She quietly stepped in the room and closed the door behind her.
Meredith smiled at the serene expression masking his tired features. He was laying half on his side, half on his stomach, his arms under the pillow supporting his head. His breathing was deep and even, and for a moment Meredith closed her eyes and simply listened to the familiar, comforting sound that she was quickly discovering was difficult to sleep without. She opened her eyes again and smiled down at him, shaking her head. Izzy had been right so many months ago. She had fallen for him. Hard. And there was no going back now.
But she didn't want to go back. Yes, it had really only been eight and a half months. And yes, sometimes it was scary to realize how dependent she had become on his presence. And yes, she had never expected this to happen to her. But she was glad it had happened to her. She was glad he had happened to her. Because she was in love with him. And she was starting to be able to look ahead and see him there with her; and she was no longer only looking forward a week, or a month, or even a year. She was finding herself looking forward decades. And he was always there, smiling that dreamy smile and telling her how much he loved her.
And she was overwhelmed with how much she wanted it. The lifetime. The life that included him, and a home, and maybe kids, and a sense of normalcy and belonging that had been lacking her entire life until now. She understood it now, the dreams and goals of all the bright and shiny kids she had gone to school with, who, as early as kindergarten, were already fantasizing about their wedding and their dress and their prince charming. She understood it now. She wanted it now. And smiling down at the peaceful man before her, she knew she wanted it with him.
He was her happily ever after. He was her future. He was the man she was going to spend the rest of her life with.
Meredith pulled herself from her reverie and crouched down, carefully pulling his arm out from under the pillow, making room for herself.
"Wha...?" He mumbled when she was settling herself beside him on the small bed.
"Shhh," she whispered. "It's just me. Go back to sleep." She pulled his arm tightly around her middle as she pressed her back into his chest.
Derek mumbled something incomprehensible, likely a string of syllables as opposed to actual words, and shifted to better accommodate her. His grip tightened on its own. He sighed. "I love you," he breathed into the back of her neck.
Meredith smiled and closed her eyes. "I love you too," she told him. And then she slept.
She didn't know how long she had been asleep when she was awoken by the very familiar sound of a pager going off. She moaned and buried her face in the pillow, her body screaming out for another six or seven hours of sleep. The spot next to her was cold and empty. Derek had been gone for some time.
Meredith sighed and reached for her pager. It was from Derek. Thought you may need a wake up call. She smiled, but it quickly turned into a grimace when she glanced at her watch. She had about a minute to meet her resident for rounds. She jumped up and hurried out of the room and down the hall, infinitely glad she had opted to change into her scrubs before looking for Derek. Although she wished she had had the foresight to set the alarm on her watch.
Rounding the last corner, she caught sight of Bailey standing in the doorway of the intern locker room. Meredith quietly came up behind her and stopped, not daring to attempt to get in the room for any reason, only hoping she would not be put on scut; even if she was really only two minutes late.
Bailey yelled into the room for her interns to hurry up, and turned, giving Meredith a surprised look. "Grey," she stated. "Were you here early?"
Meredith stuttered. "I got here earlier, yes..." It wasn't a lie.
"Good for you," she told her as the rest of her interns joined them in the hall. "The rest of you could learn a thing or two in telling time from Grey, here."
Meredith bit back a laugh.
Her resident turned back to her. "Grey, I'm in a rewarding mood. I believe Shepherd has two surgeries on the board today..."
Meredith fought the urge to nod, knowing Bailey was testing how much effort she used to keep tract of Derek's days.
"You can go ahead and scrub in on them both if he let's you, not that I would expect him not to..."
"Thank-you, Dr. Bailey," she said quickly, ignoring her best friend's pointed looked.
"Okay people, rounds," Bailey demanded as she strode off, fully expecting her well trained interns to follow. And they did.
Meredith fell into step behind her, Izzy and Cristina appearing on both sides. "Why were you here early?" Cristina asked.
"I just was," she answered quietly, trying to keep her responses off her resident's radar. She often wondered how much the older woman was privy to during their walks through the hospital.
"Ooh," Cristina responded. "Some hot, on-call room sex? Glad to see you two have finally come over to my side."
Meredith rolled her eyes. "No." She and Derek had never even had sex in the hospital before.
"But he was here last night, wasn't he?"
Meredith nodded.
"So, you came in early to...what? Just to see him?"
"Pretty much."
Cristina scoffed. "Seriously, Meredith, that's pathetic."
"I think it's sweet," Izzy cut in.
"Yeah, you would."
Izzy ignored Cristina's comment. "It's sweet," she repeated. "And it's nice that you guys do stuff like that for each other. It's his birthday, right?"
Meredith nodded. She had gone to her roommate for help the week before when she had been brainstorming for one of her gifts. Izzy hadn't been able to help, but she had sent Meredith to a place that could.
"It's McDreamy's birthday?" Cristina asked.
Meredith nodded.
"Well, I guess it's not as pathetic, so long as you only do it for him once a year."
Meredith shook her head. It had taken her a while to realize that although she and Cristina understood each other and were very similar, they were involved in very different relationships.
"Hmm," Cristina was saying. "I guess I should find out when Burke's birthday is..."
They quickly rounded on the first few surgical patients, and were quickly dispersed to their jobs for the day. Cristina was left with the patient scheduled for a bypass that day and Alex was sent to work with another cardio resident to install a shunt. Izzy and George were sent to the pit. And Derek was more than happy to take Meredith for the day.
"So," he prompted as he led her to meet their first patient for the day. "I woke up to a nice surprise this morning."
Meredith smiled. "I hoped you'd like it."
"What time did you come in?"
"Two. You kind of woke up when I lay down, mumbled a bit..."
He laughed. "What made you come in so early?"
They were in a quiet hallway, so she paused, meeting his eyes with a shrug. "I was fulfilling your birthday wish. You told me you wanted to wake up beside me..."
His small smile grew into a full fledged McDreamy smile, causing butterflies the size of apples to pound against the inside of her abdominal cavity. "You drove in at two in the morning to sleep on an on-call room bed because I said that I wanted to wake up with you?"
"Well...yeah..."
He glanced around to make sure they were alone, and leaned in to press his lips against hers. "Thank-you."
"You're welcome. And happy birthday, by the way." This time she leaned in to kiss him.
"Best birthday ever," he whispered when she pulled away, his eyes shining as his lips curled into a gentle smile. He gazed at her for several seconds as if she were something special; and it made her heart flutter to know that to him, she was.
000
Derek looked up from his chart as the door to his office opened. It was early afternoon and they had been out of surgery for about an hour, but had parted ways after informing the family of a successful surgery. She had claimed she had a few things to take care of and would meet him in his office as soon as she could.
"Hey," she greeted as she shut the door behind her, a bag over her shoulder and a stack of take out in her hands.
"Hey," he responded, standing up to help her with juggling act.
"Thanks," she told him as he took the stack of food out of her grasp. "I can't believe I got this far without dropping anything."
Derek sniffed the wonderful smells wafting up from the food containers. "Where did you get this?" It definitely wasn't cafeteria food.
"Joe's." Although they mainly used Joe's as a bar, they had managed to escape across the street for lunch a time or two, and found that Joe's was quite useful as a restaurant as well.
Meredith placed her bag down near the opposite end of the couch and motioned for him to join her. She began opening the cartons. "I got you the chicken, I hope that was right..."
Derek sat beside her, shaking his head at her thoughtfulness. "That's...great. I thought I'd be stuck with another packaged salad today."
She laughed, leaning in to press her lips against his briefly, like a habit. "Not on your birthday. It's supposed to be special, right?"
Derek closed his arms around her and sighed. "Just having you around would make it special."
She sighed in his arms and relaxed into the contact, forgoing the food dispensing for the time being. "But I'm around every day," she finally responded.
He smiled, pressing his lips against the top of her head. "And every day is special because of it."
She sat up, pulling her head away to meet his eyes. "Really?"
He nodded. "Really."
She swallowed hard. "Well, then this is to make it even more special."
"I can't believe you did all this," he marvelled. "You're amazing."
She bit her lower lip and shrugged. "Well, you deserve it, because Derek? You make every day special for me too..."
He was overwhelmed with how much he needed to express to her in that moment, and he pressed his lips back against hers for several long moment before pulling away breathless. "I love you."
"I love you too," she responded, equally breathless.
"So, what else do we have to eat?" He finally prompted, realizing they had less than an hour before they would be back to work.
Meredith smiled and opened a chicken dish for him, and a steak one for herself, as well as a plate of fries for them to share. And he was amazed that she had even gone so far as to pack plates and cutlery from home for them to use. It was nice to be eating with metal forks and knives at work for once, and not plastic.
Derek took his first bite and sighed in content at the taste. "This was a good idea, Mer," he told her thankfully.
She smiled at him before scooting closer until her shoulder was flush against his. "We'll have to do it again next year."
He laughed. "I was thinking more like tomorrow..." He trailed off, the meaning behind her words lagging behind the actual words she spoke. She had said next year. He had said it to her more than once, and her reaction was better every time. And she had never been anything other than accepting, even if she was apprehensive. But she had never voiced it herself; not in such a simple, expected, nonchalant way. And that felt good to hear. She expected them to have a next year too.
He looped his arm around her waist, happy to be close to her. "This is definitely extra special."
"Good, that's what I was going for," she said lightly.
They continued to eat quietly, trading short stories about their week and bantering lightly when the conversation called for it. When they were finished their meal, Meredith took the plate from his lap, stacked it with hers and put them, along with the cutlery, in a plastic bag on the corner of the table out of the way.
"Okay," she said, turning back to him. "Close your eyes."
Derek raised an eyebrow. "Why?"
She gave him a pointed look. "Why do you think? It's your birthday, so close your freaking eyes."
He laughed, still refusing to follow her demands. "Why? Are you going to do naughty things to me?"
She rolled her eyes. "Derek, we have like twenty minutes left, do you really expect an X-rated birthday present now?"
He nodded, barely able to conceal the grin threatening his features. "We'll just have to be quick..." He whispered, leaning in close for a kiss.
Meredith giggled and pecked him quickly on the lips, not about to be sucked in.
"Come on..." He complained.
"Hey, if you want to do the special birthday sex thing in twenty minutes, that's your call. But I'm warning you; that's all you get."
He pursed his lips, pretending to be thinking. "So, it's twenty minutes now or..."
"Or as long as you want tonight," she supplied.
"Hmm..." He murmured, pretending to be thinking. "I suppose I'll have to choose the latter."
She rolled her eyes again. "Good. Now close your freaking eyes."
Derek grumbled, but did as he was told. There was a skidding sound, followed by rustling. She had pulled her bag closer and was extracting something. There was a ping as something was set down on the table, sounding suspiciously like a plate. "Can I open them yet?" He whined, trying to get a rise out of her.
"Did I tell you that you could?" She countered.
"No..." He answered with a smirk, having gotten the reaction he was hoping for. A container was opened, and caught a whiff of something sweet. And then he heard the unmistakable sound of the thumb press on a lighter, followed by the faint smell of something burning.
"Okay, you can open your eyes now."
He did and was rewarded by the sight of Meredith sitting cross-legged beside him, handing him a small plate, hosting a cupcake with a single candle burning in the center. He was surprised to feel his eyes misting. When he was growing up, his mother had always bought a large cake, and the family celebrated together. When he was in college, Mark had taken him out drinking. When he was married, Addison would buy him something expensive and they would go out for dinner to some upscale restaurant she would have picked out. But no one had ever done something so simple, and yet so...wonderful for him on his birthday before. It didn't matter that she had told him a week ago that she was going to take him out for dinner. She had still dragged herself in at two in the morning just so he could wake up next to her. And she had gone across the street to pick up some real food for their lunch. And she had brought him a birthday cupcake. He couldn't remember the last time he had blown out a candle on his birthday; probably back in high school.
"Happy birthday," she told him quietly. "It's carrot cake, so you'll actually eat it. I didn't think I'd be able to convince you to eat a real dessert at lunch and at dinner tonight, so I went for the healthy one now."
"A birthday carrot muffin?"
She shook her head. "No. A birthday carrot-cake cupcake. It's like the same mix or whatever they use in cakes, but in cupcake form...cause I knew a whole cake would just be a waste with you," she said with a laugh. "And seriously, Derek, a muffin is not an acceptable birthday food."
He laughed, still shaking his head at her thoughtfulness. "Where did you get it?"
"Well, the correct answer is where did I get them? I had to have two dozen made to get any. I approached Izzy first, but apparently she had a bad history with carrot cake, so she sent me to that bakery downtown. And as long as I ordered a minimum of two dozen, they said they would do it."
"Well, thanks, Mer," he said softly, leaning in for yet another kiss. "I love it."
"You haven't even tasted it yet," she countered. "They're awesome. I'd even go so far as to say they are almost as good as the chocolate cake a normal person would eat, especially with the cream cheese icing."
He found himself laughing again. "I'm not a normal person?"
She shook her head without hesitation. "But don't worry; I love you anyway."
He rolled his eyes. "And you're so normal?"
"I never said I was. Now blow out the damn candle before I get in trouble for having an open flame in a hospital."
He smirked. "Usually, before the birthday celebrator is expected to blow out his candle, the giver of the cake has to sing happy birthday..."
"Yeah, well, it's not a real cake, so it doesn't count."
"I think it counts."
"I'm not singing happy birthday to you, Derek."
"Come on..."
"Not going to happen. I don't sing."
He laughed, and was surprised when the door of his office opened, quickly cutting off their playful argument. He turned his head, still holding the plate with the burning candle, to see Chief Webber standing in his doorway.
"Crap," Meredith mumbled beside him. "I knew the candle thing was going to come back and bite me in the ass."
He bit back a laugh. "Chief," he greeted.
"Derek, Meredith," Richard returned through slightly narrowed eyes. "Is this where you usually eat lunch?"
Derek shook his head. "Not usually. Just today..."
Richard approached them. "I was just going to leave this on your desk," he explained, dropping a small folder onto the table before them. "Doctor Havers from Mercy West wants your opinion on a patient. They had these faxed over this morning. They'll have you go and consult in person if you think it's necessary."
"Thanks, Chief," Derek said quickly.
Richard's eyes fell on the still burning item in his hand.
"I'm sorry about the candle, Chief," Meredith said quickly. "It's my fault. And I know it's against the rules, but I thought it would be okay, seeing as it was only supposed to be for a moment, but then Derek refused to blow it out until I sang, but I don't sing, so he refused to blow out the freaking candle and-"
"Mer," Derek said quickly, amused, as always, with her ability to ramble as she did.
"Thanks," she said quietly.
Richard also looked amused when Derek turned his gaze back to the older man. He was relieved that he didn't seem upset by the sight he had found in Derek's office. Derek couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something about the way his long term mentor looked at him and acted around him that had changed since he had found out about his relationship with Meredith. And it was something that Burke and Cristina didn't have to contend with, even though they were in the same situation. "What's the occasion?" He finally asked.
"It's his birthday," Meredith supplied.
"Well, happy birthday, Shep, I didn't know." Richard offered with a smile.
"Thanks, Chief."
Richard turned his gaze back to Meredith. "You got him a muffin for his birthday?"
"It's not a muffin," she complained, causing Derek to laugh. "It's a cupcake; made with cake batter. And it's good."
Derek couldn't help but laugh as he finally ducked his head to blow out his candle, but was stopped.
"Shep," Richard chastised. "You can't blow out your birthday candle without making a wish."
Derek blinked as he took in the laughing, but serious face of his mentor and the laughter of the woman he loved. He turned his head and met Meredith's sparkling eyes for several moments before turning back to his cake, closing his eyes and making his wish. There was only one thing he could think of that was wish worthy.
He blew out his one candle easily, pulled it out of the top of the cupcake, and took a bite. "She's right," he supplied as he swallowed. "It's very good." And it really was.
"Do you want one, Chief?" Meredith asked, reaching for the container she had pulled out of her bag.
"Oh, no, I wouldn't want to take anything away from you..."
"I have plenty," she reassured him. "I had to order two dozen. I'll have to give a bunch away anyway."
"Well, why not, then?" Richard stated, picking one out of the container Meredith was holding out to him. "I'll call it a trade for the candle."
Meredith giggled beside him at Richard's comment and Derek couldn't help but laugh as well.
"Well, happy birthday, Shep," Richard offered again. "And thanks for the cupcake. Read over the file in the next few days and contact the treating surgeon before the end of the week. It's not too urgent."
"Thanks, Chief."
Richard said a quick goodbye and left, closing the door behind him.
Meredith swiped her small hand at his arm. "I told you to hurry up with the freaking candle."
Derek laughed and pulled her close to him, ignoring her protests as he wrapped his arms around her. "Sorry," he mumbled into her hair before breathing in the intoxicating scent of lavender.
"You're not sorry," she muttered into his chest.
He laughed and tightened his hold on her small frame. "Mer, I have to tell you. This is the best birthday I've ever had."
She sat up enough to meet his eyes. "Really?"
"Really," he whispered, kissing her.
She made a joking face when he pulled away. "You taste like carrot."
"So do you," he countered, causing her to giggle in the way that made his heart melt.
"I love you," she offered.
"I love you too."
And hours later, after she had dropped off a batch of cupcakes at the nurses' station and announced it was his birthday to the surgical floor to get back at him for the candle incident, and after their afternoon surgery, and after she had taken him out to dinner at their favourite Italian restaurant, and after they had driven out to the trailer for some privacy, and after they had made good use of that privacy, Derek got the second half of the only thing he had wanted for his birthday to be special. He was lulled to sleep by the even breathing of the woman wrapped securely in his arms. She had gone out of her way to make his birthday special, just as she made special every day of his life. And as Derek closed his eyes and allowed himself to drift off, he knew there would be a next year, and a year after that, and a year after that...