*BOLD AND SERENE*
EPISODE 39
Bismillaah
*ZAKIR*
I have lived through a very hard phase of my life. I had to accept that Noor was just a friend and nothing more. I wished I had to go to school. That way,I would have been occupied with books and studies and free my mind from these thoughts. Nonetheless,I have chores at home to busy myself with.
I had asked mom to give a holiday to the workers and allow me to take care of the house. She was so proud of me.
One afternoon,I was busy washing the dishes when Khalipha came and started disturbing me.
"Why are you so childish!? Stop it,as you can see,I'm busy" he always wants to be joking around.
"Yes I can see. These days you don't even have my time. If you're not busy with these chores then you are in your room sleeping. I am not used to this new you Da" well,he was right. I just needed some alone time.
"You are right but I need my solitude. I want to be alone for sometime"
"Why? Are you heartbroken?" He said that and started laughing. "I know you are! That angel who came here the last time,you love her right?" What have I done to deserve such a mischievous and cunning little brother?
"I have an advice for you. Whatever the case is,just fight for your love!" This guy was too mature for his age.
"Hey,how do you know all these? Tell me" I placed the bowl aside and faced him.
"It's a secret,don't tell anyone Da. I have a crush on our cousin Khadijah" my eyes went wide and my mouth agape!
"Whaaaaaat!?! Khalipha....are you crazy?" He tightly held my mouth to make me stop shouting.
"Da,will you calm down. It's just a crush...please don't tell Ummaa" he whispered
"I want you to concentrate on your books! If you fail to do extremely well in your exams then know that I'm telling mom! Small boy crushing,chaaaai!" He glared at me and left the kitchen. I giggled and shook my head,this boy is unbelievable. There is only one useful thing in his jabber...'just fight for your love'. I was sulking all these while but never had I thought of fighting for my love. It might work. If I fight and lose then,Alhamdulillaah. But if I fight and get it....Maaaaa shaa Allaah. I threw a punch in the air.
I quickly washed all the dishes and ran to my room to take a quick shower. I got cladded in a denim jean and a blue T-shirt. I took with me my favorite novel with some snacks and headed to the park.
I took a seat on my favorite bench which no one occupies,maybe they leave it just for me. It was a quiet side and one can just sit there and look at the mobile world. It was so soothing and beautiful. Just fresh air and no troubles.
I decided to call Noor and see how I can keep up the fight...I mean the fight for my love,not our everyday meaningless fights.
"Hello As'salaamu alaikum" she said almost immediately she recieved the call.
"I called you so you should have waited for my greeting instead" I started a fight,as usual.
"I am Noor and you should know I do things in my own way!" She loves being unique.
"In your own weird way instead" her uniqueness is weird but cute too.
"Wait,did you just call me to have a fight with me Zak?" I chuckled and sighed. I did called to fight for my love,not with her.
"I missed our fights Cattie" I am an emotional wreck,I know. Noor suddenly went quiet. "Are you there Noorie?" I asked.
"Yesss...I am here. You? Where are you?"
"In wonder land"
"Ohh really? What happens in wonder land?" She asked.
"I come here whenever I have a lot of things to wonder about and I always find an answer to them" that was true. This was my magic land. It's as if Allah keeps all solutions to my problems in this park
"Hmmmmm. I think I also need to visit wonder land. Can you take me there?" She wants to come here too?! Whoaaaa! That's your chance Zakir!
"What if I say No?" What a bad joke!
"Nonsense! You cannot dare say No to Me!" She's my likkle boss lady.
"That's true. It's always a yes for My Cattie Noorie!" I wonder whether she noticed it or not but I deliberately called her 'mine'
"Come pick me up. I'm at my father's house"
"Ok inn shaa Allah!" She hang up immediately. I wasted no minute and ran to get my Cattie Noorie.
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I reached there in a jiffy and sent a text message to Noor before ringing the doorbell. She opened the door with a smile.
"Salaamu alaikum Cattie" I paid her smile with a toothy grin
"Wa alaikumus Salaam Zakkie" she mimicked and grinned in the same manner.
"May I greet your family members?" I raised a brow.
"Next time Inn shaa Allah!" She closed the door behind her and signalled for us to go. I just stood at the door and kept on looking at her with a smile. Why do I feel that Allah created this little Cattie just for me?
"Whaaat?" She stood akimbo.
"Nothing. Don't go and leave me here." I said and followed her.
"I want you to be with me all the time!
My Cattie Noorie!" I said it again. I emphasized on the 'my' too much that she couldn't miss it.
"You are becoming too possessive of me you know" she smirked thinking she was saying a joke.
"I know. I just don't care" I shrugged. I wanted to express what's in my heart in any way,come what may! I was just waiting for us to reach the park before I unleash my emotions in words.
We took a taxi and being the gentleman that I always am,I opened the door for her as she boarded and alighted. She kept on eerily looking at me with a small smile but never said anything.
"I don't understand you today Zak" she uttered as we walked towards the bench.
"I'll explain soon inn shaa Allah. First,take a seat" I wiped the seat with one of my handkerchiefs. She'll never say 'thank you' when I do such things for her but her smile was more than a 'thank you'! I sat beside her and passed her some buscuits.
"Noor,why did you opt to come to my wonder land?" We both just gazed at the dark blue sky and allowed the wind blow on our faces.
"Because like you...I have a lot of problems and want to find the solution to them" I threw her a glance and saw a hurtful face.
"I am suffering from one-sided love Cattie" it's crazy when you look at the person you love and tell them that they are making you suffer indirectly...even when they have no idea about what's going on with you.
"Me too" she sniffed. Oww! I didn't expect that.
"Wait...what do you mean by 'you too'? You mean the Umarr guy..." I trailed off.
"He loves my Sistur Twin instead" What?! A love triangle! I wonder why Noor is putting herself in so much trouble. Undamaged love is right in front of her...free of charge.
"That's sad but fortunate" I giggled.
"Don't be so mean" she calmly said.
"Is it wrong to want something for yourself?" She was quiet but one could tell she was processing it in her mind. "Is it wrong to be selfish just once?"
"Zakir,These words are unlike you"
"Maybe I always kept the real me hidden. I just didn't want to lose a friend in the quest of finding love" she closed her eyes awhile and opened them to look at me. For a moment,I got lost in her eyes but she quickly blinked away.
"I...I don't understand" she stuttered.
"You are too smart Noor. I know you understand"
"Explain yourself. I am not smart anymore. My instincts failed me with Umarr...I think my observation skills are gone. I only understand what is clearly said and not what I think"
"I...I" I scratched the back of my head. I never thought it would be hard for me to say this to Noor,my bestfriend...I am so okay with her,I can be the craziest in front of her. So why can't I express my feelings to her?
"You what Zakir?" She flipped her hands.
I breath in and out and huffed.
"Be a man Zakir" she giggled and I glared.
"Even when you are so annoying...I couldn't stop myself from falling in love with you" I smacked my forehead so hard with my eyes closed.
I didn't want to open my eyes! I didn't want to see the expression on her face. What if she's so angry and wants to leave? What if she gets up and runs home? What if she stops being my friend? I'll not have the right to call her 'My Cattie Noorie' anymore! What if she still loves Umarr? I lowered my face to my knees and wrapped my hands around my head. I know Noor is gone. She does not entertain such nonsense. She's gone! She is gone!
.
.
.
"Bestfriend!" She called. She was here! Noor didn't run away! She didn't sever our friendship! She still thinks I'm her bestfriend! It was not a dream!
"My Zakkie!" She called me 'her' Zakkie! My emotions can't be named. I wanted to cry and laugh at the same time. "Lift your head up and look at me" with the way she spoke,I know her emotions have reached her tears. I gradually raised my head and looked at My Noorie. I didn't even realise that I was crying! I had given up on this love and thought there would never be a chance.
"See...I didn't run away" she giggled amidst tears. "Please don't cry. You ain't losing any friend! If there is a bestfriend I would never lose then it's my Zakkie! My only bestfriend!" She opened her bag and gave me a tissue to wipe off my tears.
"Just that...I am not in the mood to say I like or dislike anyone. I have been through so much pain lately. I just want to be with you as of now. I want to feel your presence and allow myself to drown in the too much peace you always carry with you" she smiled. I understood her. I know how it feels to be rejected.
I would just wait for her to get rid of all her pain.
I just believe that after that!
I'll be the apple of her eyes!
I'll be My Cattie's Zakkie!
We rested our backs on the bench and looked at the sky. She looked at me again.
"Are you sure you love me Zak? I'm too annoying to be true" she chortled.
"In fact,I love your annoyingness more" I shrugged.
"May Allah love you too Zak" she had been smiling all day long.
"You too. Ameeeen"I smiled and in my heart I could hear
Maaaa Shaa Allah!
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(✏TIMABELLE💛)