Jay held the little being protectively, his mind spiralling into confusion and caution. The wind raged coldly around him, exerting pressure on the many trees of the forest. It was as if nature argued with nature.
He took a deep breath, steadying himself and honing his senses. He let everything else lose his focus and only saw the little boy, reading his aura. A strong yellow filled his vision, quiet sparks of energy igniting the space. A wave of warmth and joy overwhelmed him, settling the disagreement of his atmosphere, calling the sun out of the cover of the dark clouds.
You're okay.
Jay sighed, smiling, now shifting his focus towards the rest of the Shadow-Trappers. Zeno, Ila and Clement lay on the floor, their energy considerably drained, but they would be okay. Umbra and Hedley stood together below a tree, seeking protection while healing the Nature around them. Their energy was relatively okay, but a deep sorrow lay in their minds and especially Hedley's.
Pranetra stood amidst the wind, a smile on her face. She walked over to the three who sat on the floor, helping them up gently. The four of them began to converse as if nothing much had happened, though they didn't stray from the burning topic for long.
Jay remembered everything clearly. The sense of the Shadow Dimension, Vlad and the promises that were made. He now wore a worried expression, his gaze still on Pranetra. He didn't expect her of all beings to form a strong connection with Mildred in such a short span of time.
But in that dimension, there is no time...
Pranetra caught her brother's look, turning to him with that radiant smile. She raised her chin up a bit, as if asking if something was wrong and Jay shook his head.
Suddenly Ila ran forward, coming at a stop and sitting on her knees. She was beside a small, thin boy, his eyes full of light and intrigue. A t-shirt hung around him loosely and Ila thought his cargo shorts made him look especially cute. He wore a warm smile at the sight of Ila, as did the latter.
"Hey Clay, what are you doing here?"
"Exploring," Clay said softly, now scanning the others who now stood in a line behind Ila. His focus fell on Jay, or more specifically, on what Jay held. He wasn't sure why, but something called to him.
Jay's eyes widened and he softened his grip on the little boy. He let his surroundings quieten, focusing on the little boy and Clay's aura to make sure.
There's no mistake... that's her. His mo-
No.
It was as if Jay's mind was divided and the rational reasoned with the emotional.
That is a little boy. Clay. They may be the same soul, they may share energies, but they are only the same in the Shadow Dimension. Not in the physical plane. Not here on Earth.
Jay sighed, hiding his thoughts with a smile. Clay turned back towards Ila whose warmth couldn't help but make him happy. Or perhaps, there was something else, too.
"You know, this area of the forest is not in its best state right now, so I say we leave it to heal itself, okay?"
"Can't we help the forest?"
Ila's mind melted into a buttery softness and Umbra beamed. "Yes, of course, but not now. Often, things just need to be."
Clay nodded understandingly, waving his hand to say bye to Ila. His t-shirt bounced about him as he skipped away from the council, his eyes observing his surroundings along the way. He then stopped for a moment and the wind settled around him.
"Elek."
The word appeared in Jay's mind, as if someone cast an illusion. Clay resumed his leave, now walking silently.
Jay went closer to the others and they immediately huddled around their leader. Jay still held onto Elek protectively and no one else looked at the little boy.
"He was born under... odd circumstances, and growing up things will probably be difficult for him. Nevertheless, it is our duty to take care of him to the best of our abilities, and we'll make sure he's safe. We'll head back to the headquarters and discuss with the others what we have to do moving forward. For now, however..."
The leaves circled around Jay, just a little. As the wind ran through the leaves, a soft melody reverberated in the open, altruistic atmosphere. Jay finally revealed his being to the world, removing the cloth that was on his face.
At the sight of the little boy, everyone smiled warmly.
"Welcome, Elek."
- - - - -
Jay's heart pumped hard. His senses were heightened, yet he was unaware of his surroundings. The raging flames, the weeping Shadows, the tightened atmosphere... everything tugged his mind. He didn't care that Vlad was in the vicinity. He didn't care that his brother was in the vicinity, for at that moment, he was a Shadow-Trapper.
The golden liquid oozed around Elek, and naturally, the boy maintained his smile.
Of all the losses that he had to bear over the past few years, this one was hitting him differently. Jay had never felt so angry at himself, almost hating this hopelessness. He was supposed to take care of Elek not just because he was the leader, but because he promised her he would do so.
Jay took a deep breath, observing the demons. The usually dormant beings now approached the group quickly, weapons raised, eyes still muddled. Elek still lay on the floor and Evelyn and Audrey couldn't move an inch.
The others could barely fight the demons and Jay didn't wish for them to do so, especially at that moment. With a deep exhale he rendered all the demons unconscious. No one, other than Elek, noticed this, returning their attention to their friend.
They fought out of instinct.
The flames lunged forward and Trina's wings sprung open, protecting everyone. Within a second her aura was filled with pain and Jay felt every bit of it. He now wore a hardened look and immediately dove into Vlad's mind.
"Stop this."
Menod took over for a moment and the flames subsided. Jay nodded to Jack and Theo, snapping them out of their daze, and the two immediately transported everyone out of there.
Evelyn and Audrey sat on the stone-cold floor, the gentle light that entered their main hall looking like a cruel joke, now. Galen and Jack immediately went to Audrey and Conrad and Theo to Evelyn, though all were barely able to hold themselves together.
Jay was now near Trina who did her best to put on a brave front, but Jay understood the immense pain she was in.
"Come with me," he said softly as he extended his hand, the kindest look on his face. Aurelia came close too now, already knowing everything that had to be done. The hall wasn't the place for the healing, and Jay wasted no time. Trina nodded and took the hand, and he took her and Aurelia to Ariana.
He stood outside the infirmary, leaning against the wall, his hands crossed. First Ila, then Pranetra, Clement, Umbra and Hedley. Then Zeno, too, and now Holly and Elek. So many others suffered, in general, and still many are suffering.
I cannot let this happen anymore, even beyond my death.
- - - - -
Jay stood still in the garden, the breeze moving playfully throughout its vast stretches. Sylva Vita was lit up by the brilliant moonlight, and a little additional lighting around the trees illuminated the space further. The pathways made of stone were especially bright as they reflected the moonlight well. Some Shadow-Trappers worked constantly, making sure everything was ready for the event. Some stayed close together, trying to control their grief, while others simply waited.
Jay was curious to see how the Annual Ball would go, not just because the Phoenexias were visiting, but also because of the two additional 'special' ones: Aurelia and the last Wind Phoenexia: Ariana.
The Shadow felt a spike in the headquarters' aura and realised they had come. He swiftly walked towards the portal, greeting each Shadow-Trapper with a smile and nod of his head along the way. Jay could hardly think of anything else. Usually, either the 'queen' or 'king' would stand alongside him and aid in the process of marking the names, but from now on that would be Aurelia's duty.
Jay now found himself in front of the room. He took a deep breath, opening the wooden door softly and closing it in the same manner after entering the room. His footsteps fell softly on the wooden floor, echoing throughout the long room. The short width of the area made the increasing light concentrated in a central line of the room. He stood at one corner as he waited for the Phoenexias to come. Not all came - the king, Aurelia, Ariana and a few others would be here, and the king would establish a connection with the queen so that the people could be connected.
Jay wore a small smile as the king and Ariana appeared in the room, wearing a likewise expression. A few Phoenexias followed them and each's presence lightened the atmosphere. As each came, they all shuffled to one side of the room, making way for the others.
A vibrant light filled the room as she appeared, her golden eyes burning brightly, settling as the light faded away. She wore an elegant orange dress that shimmered even in the room's dim lighting. A small smile sat on her face, humble and comforting, presenting an especially humble aura to those vibrant eyes. Her curled, red hair fell to her shoulders, standing boldly against her lightly tanned skin.
"Hello," Aurelia said softly, and her melodic tone immediately reminded Jay of Audrey's piano. Jay's smile brightened and he nodded, glancing at everyone.
"Good evening, everyone. Welcome to Earth. I do hope you like your stay here, especially on this day of the Annual Ball. Please follow me."
Jay walked opened the door and walked out, standing to the side to give way to everyone else. Aurelia walked first, Ariana being shyly moving right behind her, followed by the king and the rest of the Phoenexias. Jay closed the door and walked to the front of the crowd, guiding them to Sylva Vita.
Ariana's eyes lit up as she saw the area, causing Aurelia to smile deeply. That scene made Jay quite happy, although he couldn't help but miss his own sister at that moment. Something told him that Pranetra and Aurelia would get along especially well.
Ariana pulled Aurelia's hand and the Phoenexia bent down to let her sister whisper to her. Aurelia nodded and turned towards Jay, her eyes as bright as ever.
"Ariana appreciates how the setting here has a sense of life, even though the day remembers the Shadow Beings who passed away this last year."
Jay nodded. "I'm glad you think so as that is an integral aspect of the Annual Ball."
Aurelia's smile deepened, clearly appreciating such a sentiment, and Ariana emerged from her sister's cover to show her satisfaction, now more comfortable in Jay's presence.
"Would you like me to give you a tour of Sylva Vita?" Jay asked with a soft smile at which Ariana lit up, causing Aurelia to chuckle softly. The Phoenexia gave a small nod and Ariana's grip on her sister's hand tightened.
"Let them explore the area for a while," the King started, his tone deep and solemn. "We need to discuss a few matters, and then you can return to them."
Jay gave a nod, accepting the proposition, as did Aurelia and Ariana. The younger girl pulled Aurelia deeper into Sylva Vita and Aurelia turned around with a smile, closing her eyes as she gave a brief wave with her hand, and Jay gave a short nod in response.
"This is Ariana's first ball and I imagine the aura of death can be a little overwhelming for her, seeing where she's from and her situation," the king said in a hushed tone, his eyes fixated on the girl in mention. Jay responded with a nod, looking up very slightly to match the king's height.
"As she said, it is good to see a sense of life maintained in your environment. However, grief is still dominant, as expected. I imagine you lose a lot more Shadow-Trappers than we do Phoenexias. Ours generally pass away naturally, while yours often lose too much energy, correct?"
Jay nodded, displaying a neutral facade. With the cause of death being put so plainly, Jay felt useless and disappointed. He was their leader and he had been so for the past twenty-two years. What had he done with his time?
Ever since his sister's death, Jay felt confused. It was as if a part of him had been hidden away, out of his reach, out of all contemplations. Jay didn't understand what it was, but ever since that day his understanding of the world had decreased. He knew about the seven lands, he knew about the seven techniques, he knew about the Attack of Novo and what happened to the Wind Phoenexias, he knew about their and the Demonic Creatures' origins and their relationship with some of the lands. However, certain details were missing.
It was a patchwork of information.
Who caused the attack? Why must we fight the Demonic Creatures? What made the Demons aggressive all of a sudden? Was it only their leader, Vlad, or something else? Why do they have no contact with the Angels? How have the Phoenexias changed since their beginning? How have we changed?
"I am also aware that in your time as the leader, the number of deaths of Shadow-Trappers has decreased significantly, although the proportion is less for the Demonic Creatures."
Oh, right. How did he do that? He taught his people the weaknesses of the Demonic Creatures and changed the weapons system, trying to slowly bring back the seven techniques. Why were those techniques abandoned in the first place?
Too powerful.
"That brings me to my question. Do you mark the deaths of only Shadow Beings?"
Jay didn't expect that, and he knew he had to be truthful.
"No. The Demonic Creatures, and previously the Wind Phoenexias, are included, too."
"Then when their mass destruction had occurred, were the names of the Wind Phoenexias marked?"
A particularly harsh gust of wind blew. Jay took a deep breath, letting the atmosphere settle with his exhalation.
"I am not sure. I think the leader of the time passed away before their annual ball came, so I don't know how they marked the names."
"And what is the use of this tradition?"
"You could say it is a way of supplying information to the Shadow Dimension. These souls are returning to the Shadow Dimension, as none of them return to partake in life or any other planes.
"But the Demonic Creatures and Wind Phoenexias have no souls. Why are their names marked?"
"I..."
Why are their names marked?
Jay closed his eyes, seeing the sight of the golden one and the girl clad in blue chatting away happily, walking around Sylva Vita, learning about Earth's Nature.
Soulless... then why?
One came from Nature, without a soul. One came from the Shadow Dimension, with a soul. How were they different?
Jay opened his eyes as he took a deep breath. The king stood patiently, waiting for an answer.
"I believe it is marked out of respect. They may not have souls but they do have energy, which is a different form of information. More relevant to the lands than the Shadow Dimension, but important nevertheless."
It was the first time Jay had ever seen the king wear a smile, however small and brief it was. The Phoenexia gave a satisfied nod followed by a slight bow, leaving the leader to return to his own group.
Jay returned the gestures and turned around, walking in a lithe manner towards the two sisters.
"Hello," came a full, soft voice behind Ariana. She turned around swiftly, smiling at Jay as she returned the greeting.
"What do you think of the place so far?" Jay asked sweetly, bending on one knee to reach Ariana's height, staying a fair distance away from the eight-year-old,
"It's wonderful! Everywhere I go feels alive and active, and I see that everything comes up naturally. Whoever takes care of Sylva Vita is doing a wonderful job."
Jay beamed with pride at that as he thought the same. He wished Ava didn't have to grow up so soon, but he admired how she did everything with her composed demeanour.
"Ava is the one who does so. Perhaps you can meet her, I think you'd get along well."
Ariana blushed at that prospect, wearing a shy smile, but Jay could see a sense of excitement bubble.
"I'd love to take you around the Land of the Valleys! It's an amazing place, full of energy while being soft."
"She's from there, originally, so she visits quite often," Aurelia explained without pronouncing her sister's condition, and Jay understood. Ariana seemed to have caught on to her sister's discretion and her smile deepened, appreciating the thought.
"Ariana dear, come here for a bit," the king's voice came softly and Ariana went to him at once with a smile, but left Aurelia's hand somewhat reluctantly. Aurelia gave the girl a reassuring smile and the latter nodded, feeling better as the former turned to Jay.
"You care quite a lot about her, don't you?"
The question took Aurelia by surprise and she observed the kindness on Jay's face, nodding slowly. His eyes held the most gentle look she had ever seen, yet they were daunted by something... as if a small, grey cloud was waiting to break, its weight controlled with firmness.
"I have a lot of reasons, but most importantly I just don't want her to be alone. I feel responsible for her."
The golden light dimmed and the silence that filled that lively space felt unsettled.
"She's technically very old. She's been in that Valleys' pocket for over three millennia, but perhaps mentally she is still a child. I'm thankful that the land protected her from the attack, but every day I wonder if even being present that day did something to her energy.
"We don't really know much about that day, do we? Only that because of someone, all of the Wind Phoenexias were wiped away."
Jay nodded slowly, but somehow his answer felt wrong.
"Sylva Vita is a beautiful place," Aurelia started in a soft tone, drawing the Shadow's attention to lighter thoughts.
"It's not a garden though, is it? The space feels to be much more than that," Aurelia continued softly and Jay nodded satisfactorily. Aurelia lifted her gaze to the moonlight and the starry sky. Little, twinkling dusts of nature, filling the vastness of the dark cosmos. Bouts of information in the emptiness, the moonlight presenting a sense of realism.
A scene she had seen exactly in her home, countless times.
"I can't help but wonder... could a living thing wander into this place?"
Jay took a moment to pause, trying to recall such a situation, but he could mostly come up with theoretical information.
"They could - we have seen certain animals and butterflies here - but I don't think they can see the full picture."
"A filter for reality?"
"I suppose so, yeah."
Aurelia found that quite curious. Such a filter was not found in her own place as it had never been touched by a living, sentient being. She recalled how Shadow-Trappers didn't have a 'home' as such in any of the worlds of existence, yet they were currently all on Earth. They had been for quite some time, possibly because of the living things of Earth.
What about that made them stay here? Stripped of their freedom...
"Have you ever been to the Land of Hearth?"
Jay shook his head, a flicker of intrigue appearing in his eyes, but the cloud persisted.
Visiting the other lands wouldn't be such a bad idea, Jay thought, but he knew his present wasn't the right time. Not when doing so could adversely affect the energy of the land he went to.
"I think you'll like it. In some ways it is similar to Earth, but in others it is completely different." The golden in her eyes brightened again, and Jay thought if he stared at it long enough, he could experience her world.
"The Nature isn't as diverse - Autumn is the most persistent season, in a sense? - while Earth is geographically variant, but the energy associated with Hearth comes in all forms. Vibrant, mellow, comforting, invigorating... sorrow, joy, knowledge, wonder and so on. If there is a thought or emotion associated with any form of sentience, it is there.
"The flora is also not sentient, so I suppose calling it flora is also wrong. The phoenixes, the trees and such are with souls, but they aren't living as they originate from the Shadow Dimension, not Nature. No processes of life are present in them.
"In that sense, I think Earth is the active phase while Hearth is passive. That's why all changes that have been made in the nature of the Shadow Beings reflect mostly in your headquarters, and your land."
Your land. Jay wasn't sure how he felt with Earth being referred to in that manner, but it certainly wasn't bad. Perhaps there was a hint of pride.
"There are no living things, but Phoenexias are like a mix of humans and shadow-trappers, perhaps? In the most simple words, if Earth is a plane of realism, Hearth is for imagination, perhaps."
"Possibilities in one, probabilities in the other. Something like that?" Jay asked, and Aurelia responded with a satisfied nod, her glow brightening still.
Imagination... thoughts floating away from reality...
"Perhaps that's the reason belief pervades Earth, while duty is our primary concern. The land is one way, and the beings are trying to centre the aura, perhaps," Aurelia added finally, the aftermath of her voice stirring old feelings within Jay.
Duty...
"Some of what you say remind me of a shadow-trapper: Audrey. I don't suppose you know about her?"
Aurelia heard a trill of notes, reverberating across the line of water in the vicininty.
"I don't think I do, but that name sounds a little familiar."
Familiar and old...
"I've always wanted to take her to the Land of Hearth since being in her presence gives me a sense of comfort that might be similar to that of Hearth's from what I've heard," Jay said, a small smile replacing his previous intrigue. "I've never myself been to that land," Jay added, letting some confusion return.
What lands have I visited? Jay thought. From his memories, the answer appeared to be only Earth, but from the history of his energy that sounded false...
"Taking Audrey to places other than the headquarters is a little difficult though. If we say we have to go somewhere her first question used to be, 'Do they have a piano?' If miraculously the answer is yes, she'd still stick herself to the one we have here because it's her 'best friend'."
Aurelia chuckled as Jay shook his head, clearly hiding his grin.
"The outskirts have a wonderful piano, which I've always found odd since no one plays it. Ever," Aurelia replied with a chuckle and Jay widened his eyes, putting on a serious facade.
"Don't ever let Audrey learn that, you won't hear the end of it," Jay said in a hushed tone and Aurelia attempted to stifle her laughter which lead to both of them chuckling. Fortunately, no one was around them.
Aurelia sighed as she finally stopped laughing, a smile remaining.
"You feel very responsible for Audrey, don't you? You've spoken about her for a minute, but it's already clear. Why is that?"
Jay wore a smile as he thought about the little girl, momentarily letting go of his surroundings.
"Her mother was like a sister to me, so I've known Audrey since her first moment here. We share abilities and she's just precious."
Aurelia's face brightened at Jay's expressions, and she could sense the flurry of positive emotions that ran through his head. The silence that filled the air was sweet, akin to a soft melody on her instrument, but the aura gradually fell into something more melancholic.
"Ever since she lost her parents, both she and I have been confused in different ways and for different reasons. There are aspects of her that make her... vulnerable to certain emotions. She had Jack, Ava and Galen so she wasn't alone, but they're just kids. Taking care of them is my responsibility as the leader anyway."
It was then that Aurelia saw that tiny cloud of doubt leave Jay's mind, keeping space only for his duty. She still wasn't sure what it was about Jay that she liked so much, and now Audrey. In such a short span of time, too.
Liking... isn't that a sentient concept?
"Your bond with her sounds sweet," Aurelia replied in her dulcet tone. "I'm sure she adores you."
For the first time that day, Jay's eyes sparkled, possibly outshining Aurelia's.
"I do hope so," Jay responded with a smile. The breeze was quite cold on that winter night, but the cover of moonlight shared some of its warmth with the atmosphere of Sylva Vita. Jay and Aurelia continued walking on that path made of stone, their footsteps silent, heading to the place they were needed.
The Trees of Remembrance.
Ariana and the king already stood by the raised platform while the other Phoenexias were spread across the crowd of Shadow-Trappers. Ariana smiled at the sight of her sister but chose to remain at her place, standing still.
"In the Annual Ball after her parents' death, Audrey sang a song," Jay whispered to Aurelia with a sorrowful smile. The Phoenexia wasn't sure how to react, feeling more doleful than sweet.
"She didn't exactly sing it, I think. It was very faint, but I heard a song being projected across the atmosphere one layer beyond reality. I don't think she was aware of it," Jay continued, facing the raised platform. He took a deep breath and turned to see Aurelia, who now wore the same expression as him.
Aurelia wondered why music mattered to that Shadow-Trapper so much - something borrowed from humans, or did it go beyond that? - but she found it endearing nevertheless. Aurelia gave a reassuring nod and Jay exhaled, closing his eyes.
A sound came from the bushes and near instantaneously, something was plunged through Jay's gut.
The sharp pinch of the blade shook Jay out of the pleasant atmosphere, taking the Shadow away from reality into a currently unfamiliar space. Absent of everything, the epitome of nothingness, yet it was full of quiet information.
"Hello, Hawsod," came the weak voice of an entity, nervous, shy and scared. All Jay could feel was confusion, his first question wondering about the identity of the voice.
"Do you... do you not recognise me?" Jay's question persisted, becoming more troublesome.
"Oh, I see. Genal suppressed your memories during her death. I do not want to over-burden you, either." Genal? Jay wondered who that was, and his memories...?
"Perhaps we will catch up some other day, then." Jay was too curious to let go of the conversation at that point, but the depth of the wound made his thoughts foggy and something felt heavy on his mind, unable to give his thoughts space. He desperately used his ability to hold on, but at that moment the other entity was stronger.
"Things can get difficult here. Vlad is a heavy existence, and my role in it feels exhausting. I'd never imagined Rage to be a dominant part of an entity. But anyway, Sousconic is here to help, so you needn't worry about me.
"I do worry about you, though. No point in telling you anything yet, I must be patient until your memories return, whenever they are supposed to. Of course, this conversation will come to you only with those memories."
Wait...
"Until we meet again, Hawsod. I hope that time comes soon."
Aurelia impulsively pushed back the blade against the Shadow-Trapper, a horrific terror overcoming her at the sight of the golden liquid. Her fingers shook as she realised the blade had no hilt.
A Masada Blade. Pure, without protection for the attacker.
"What did you do?"
Aurelia hesitantly turned towards the deep voice, the tone unsettlingly calm. The disappointment in her father's eyes cut through her confidence, but it was kept aside as she realised there was someone she had to heal.
The Phoenexia knelt down immediately and placed one hand on Jay's gut. The unconscious shadow seemed okay, his aura only slightly dulled, but his energy was leaking out at quite the pace.
"You will be exiled from The Land of Hearth for the next seven years. You may live in the house that is on the outskirts."
It feels as if he was waiting for me to make a mistake, Aurelia thought, glancing at her sister who desperately tried to contain her confusion and sorrow. Aurelia warded it all off for the moment as all that mattered was Jay's health.
Aurelia placed her other hand on the ground. The land around her glowed, the aura deepening till a tipping point after which the energy flowed through the channel she created, from Earth and into Jay.
Seconds later the shadow's eyes opened. Jay immediately stood up, taking a deep breath and breathing out slowly to compose himself. He glanced at his gut, feeling that it was as if the wound was never there. The tension in the atmosphere was unmistakable, however, and he felt a particular pressure come from the King. Jay wore a smile, giving Aurelia a discreet grateful nod. Aurelia responded with a small smile, visibly disturbed by what had happened. Jay thought she was only doing her duty, and she did it well.
It was only an honest mistake. The Phoenexia wouldn't have dealt with any... hold on, a Masada blade in the hands of a Shadow-Trapper? Where had he gone, and how did he get his hands on a demon's blade?
"We should leave," Aurelia said softly, the glow that once was in her eyes almost faded. Jay wanted to give her a lecture on why she shouldn't feel guilty but he knew it wasn't the right time. Perhaps he'd never find the right time.
The King nodded, and the Phoenexias took their leave, now containing mixed feelings of the events that took place.
"Audrey will come to you. Keep an eye on her."
Jay wasn't entirely sure why he projected that thought into Aurelia's mind. He instantly felt foolish - she would think the action to be disrespectful, wouldn't she? And why would she keep an eye on a person she barely knows? In what way would she keep an eye, and in what universe would that not be... creepy?
A tear glimmered in her golden light and she wasn't sure why. Aurelia smiled, appreciating the thought and it quelled her worries to a certain degree. She didn't think it was possible to get attached to someone without ever meeting them, but something about Audrey called to her...
Aurelia turned away, following the other Phoenexias. Everyone remained perplexed at the King's decision, but no one questioned.
No one except Jay.
"Why-
"I wish I didn't, I really do," The king thought to Jay, urging the Shadow to listen to him. "But I have to."
I have to...
He didn't know the King's reasons but as a leader, he knew that feeling all too well.
Jay gave an understanding nod, the rigidity in his eyes only slightly softened by a kind glow. After he led the Phoenexias back to their land, he returned to his own.
- - - - -
The thick orange cover lay carefully in Jay's hands, closed for the time being. After opening it the first time, the book had no effect on the Shadow even if he saw it again. Its presence was almost as that of an ordinary book. Still, it felt odd. Everything was off.
Jay still couldn't completely wrap his head around his hidden memories. A few days ago, before he read the book Entity, he was an oblivious shadow. But now he's some entity himself? And so was Pranetra? And they have a brother who is a part of Vlad?
I am not a Shadow-Trapper?
What sort of entity was he? That was still one detail he couldn't quite remember. The familiarity of his past would sink in with time, he didn't doubt that. But this was one thing he still didn't quite understand.
Jay took a deep breath, standing just outside the room now.
I have to step in and visualise the Land of Grace. Just the thought, the vibe.
Jay figured that since the book was from there, its spirit - Aqdas - might have some answers. And if his memory was indeed true, it seemed he had met the spirit once before, as Jay.
Jay stepped into that empty room. A dim light gave it a soft glow, and the sphere lay dormant. Jay's breathing was deeper now. Longer, more thoughtful, more aware. He thought about the land, whatever his memories could muster, whatever information he had gathered from the books.
A smile instinctively came to his face.
The sphere instantly grew bright, emitting a brilliant yellow. Jay felt his physical existence fade away as he was pulled into nothingness, his mental existence becoming firmer in that place that was an absence of space. Without understanding the passage of time, he was dropped into a land of gentle sunlight.
Jay found himself in a cave, the light gently illuminating the area as it fell through the gaps of the layers of vines. Jay walked forwarded slowly, parting the vines to enter a wide, bright field.
With the first step onto the yellow grass, a joyful jolt passed through him, making him feel light and relieving him of his previous worries. The space was absolutely empty; there were no signs of any flora or fauna. The breeze was nearly still, and the temperature was neither too hot, nor too cold. The sunlight was mellow not because of a cover of clouds, but because that was simply how it burned.
Jay wondered about the lack of living things. Holly had described them endlessly, as if it was almost better than Sylva Vita. Jay then realised that Aqdas must've temporarily had them in the land for Holly's sake.
Aqdas... since the moment Jay was outside the room and now, it felt as if he knew Grace's spirit quite well.
An old friend. Forgotten, but he was in the process of remembering.
"Hello, Jay."
The thought appeared in Jay warmly, surprising him ever so slightly without seeming sudden.
"Hello, Aqdas."
Jay wasn't sure how to proceed. He felt Aqdas's presence pervade through the land, and he found the silence with the spirit too comforting.
"Do you know why I am here?" Jay asked quietly. Everything remained still.
"Your memories returned, right?"
Jay nodded softly, and everything still felt surreal. However, the neutrality of the land comforted him, seeming so natural and so like... himself. His memories no more felt foreign as he had started to remember.
"Now that I am here my thoughts feel less chaotic, but some things still confuse me."
"I am here for you if you have any questions, or anything else."
Jay had a feeling Aqdas would respond in that manner and he deeply appreciated it.
"Why did Pranetra take them away?"
"That is something only she can say, but I think it was to protect you from your doubt. You always thought she would be a better leader to the Shadow-Trappers."
"Is it not good to push through your doubt, then move onto your duty?"
"Not when time is running out."
"The same doubts could come now."
"But they don't, because your experience all these years are also a part of your memories. You have... evidence. Are you still doubtful of your nature?"
"Not in that way anymore... but there is something I need to understand a little, before moving on."
"And what is that?"
"Myself."
A flicker of wind disturbed the neutrality.
"Jay, you know how I am the spirit of Grace, right?"
Jay nodded slowly.
"And you know that your 'brother' Menod is in Vlad along with Sousconic and that emotion. Sousconic is, in a sense, Azrael and Zephyr and my parent. Sousconic's counter is Triyeal, who also has three 'children'. Can you guess what Menod is?"
Jay hesitated. Something came to him on instinct, and he decided to go with it.
"Chaos's spirit?"
"Correct. The other two who remain are Genal and you.
"What are you and your sister?"
"Pranetra, no sorry, Genal is like an Angel so... and that means I..."
For just a moment, the breeze ran and the temperature increased, indicating a positive response.
Oh. Jay's memories flashed through his mind. His birth, his arrival to Earth, his years with Ehren, his years with Pranetra, his time with the Shadow Council, him as a leader, him as their mentor... and everything confounded the Shadow more.
"But still, who am I?"
"Who am I is indeed an intriguing question.
"Are you Jay? That's just this vessel's name. Are you the leader of the shadow-trappers? That's just this vessel's designation. Are you a mind controller? That's this vessel's ability. Are you the spirit of Earth? That's your designation. Are you Triyeal's child? That is a somewhat false description of a part of your origin.
"Are you a Shadow Being? That is also a description of your origin. That tells what you are, not who.
"I believe such a question cannot be answered through words or thoughts. It's beyond all of existence, perhaps even the Shadow Dimension. The best you can do is realise what your duty is and fulfil it while discovering yourself on the way. Doing the opposite would waste time."
"Duty before self."
"Perhaps."
Some time had passed as evident by the darker blue shade of the sky. Jay found it curious how the geography of the land was quite different from Earth. The laws of Nature and the progression of time were similar, not identical. Yet the atmosphere essentially was. The sky, the overall space, the cosmic model. What did that say about the seven lands?
"The Spirits and the Shadows all have their roles to play when they materialise into existence. If one is present with the land, the other can go to freedom for some physical duration, but the order must be maintained.
"Each member of a trio - the spirit, the land and the shadow - share qualities. These seven 'groups' are not dissimilar from each other. Do our little differences make us separate? Does individuality matter?"
Jay found the open-ended nature of the questions... satisfying? Comforting? For the moment it quelled his worries, and Jay decided to trust the passage of time to reach his conclusion.
"I should return to Earth, now."
A positive aura momentarily circled Jay, and the leader took his leave.
- - - - -
Iris wore a wide smile, her eyes bright with the moonlight, evading the golden light of his blood.
Golden blood... I really existed here as a Shadow-Trapper? No... but I am a Shadow.
Past the innocent face, Jay was saddened by Audrey's misty eyes. All he wanted to do was comfort the Shadow and make her realise her worth, but he trusted Audrey enough to know she would push past this phase of doubt.
It had been going on for long enough, however.
Jay turned back to Iris. The little girl's hands affectionately caressed Jay's cheek, a smile full of light brightening her dark blue eyes. Her brown hair barely outlined her head, blending against the cover of the large trees situated far behind her, the green that sprouted accompanying her green outfit as the perfect background to the shadow.
Earth has been waiting for you for so long.
Jay knew the shadow-trappers needed their true leader to return to equilibrium, and that leader needed much guidance from other shadows and spirits. Jay trusted all of them. All he had to do was make his decision, fulfil his duty, and let nature run its course.
A chain of causal effects.
Iris pulled the spirit into a long embrace, a gesture Jay didn't expect but wholeheartedly returned. If it weren't for time's hand, the moment would never break.
As Jay handed Iris back to Jack, he glanced at Audrey. Such a sullen expression, full of sorrow, despair, and a forlorn duality of hope and hopelessness. The golden glow of the Phoenexia who stood behind did little to comfort her, for the first time ever. Still, she held herself together well enough, her aura as soft as ever.
Be brave. I trust you.
----- -------
Audrey knew it was wrong, but she had never wished for Jay to be alive more than now. Had he been here, he could guide the Shadow of Earth to its duties.
Audrey shook her head as the realisation came. As a physical existence, Jay - no, Hawsod - wouldn't properly be the spirit of Earth. She wondered if Hawsod sat with Paliv Verasel in that tree, but she figured that would still take some time.
Audrey had also never felt more grateful to all the mentors in her life. Her parents, Aurelia, Ava, Jay and now... Paliv Verasel. She and her friends had to be good for the next and final one.
The minute vibrations woke Audrey out of her focus and she turned towards a hopping Iris, observance strong in her green eyes. The little girl gazed at the flowers around her, drooping as the aftermath of the somewhat heavy rain. Some autumn leaves of many trees lay stuck between its branches, while others drifted towards the ground. The sky remained grey, an endless sea that covered the world below from cosmic sights like a protective blanket.
Concealing.
Iris bent towards the ground and lifted her chin up, aiming a short blow of breath towards the flowers. The wind picked up the energy, playfully drifting as it raised the petals and gave life to the movement of the leaves. A smile emerged across Iris's expression but the girl stopped at the somewhat disquieting vibrations. Icebergs in the sea, tectonic plates slipping, turbulent winds in dangerous sections, electrical discharge in the atmosphere, microorganisms in danger...
The girl lightly tapped the ground, doing nothing for the moment. Nature would run its course, but tiny waves through the shadows could help Earth.
Iris turned around, waving her hand towards Audrey with large movements before returning to her exploration, and Audrey returned the gesture modestly.
For you, I'll do anything.