Zara POV
Just wait a little while, I told my impatient wolf. Although it was more for myself.
He'll be here soon.
And he didn't prove me wrong.
I was meditating when Blaze had finally formed in and slammed the door open.
"WHO IS HE?" He demanded panting. He was already aggravated from the wat.
Finally lost all pretenses of patience have we? I knew he has been struggling with this question for a while now. But he was too afraid to know the answer. Even if he pretended he wasn't.
For the first time, I felt I shouldn't provoke him. Something was wrong. He looked on edge, and there wasn't a single soul to stop him. Not that I couldn't but it would be limited. I felt weary for the first time. What from starving myself and the blood loss.
I kept my face carefully blank.
I didn't want him to know the rage boiling within me.
Little did I know, even if I scoffed at that little voice warning me, I should have listened it, just this time. Blaze circled me like he was hunting prey.
His eyes scanned the walls covered in blood. There was no change in expression. Not even when he looked at my wounded knuckles. That was disappointing. We both stared at each other with blank expressions, our faces and bond betraying nothing. This was a real power struggle
Alpha to alpha. King to luna. No one could tell how would win in the end. Come out stronger for it.
He bend down to my level as I was sitting leaning against the bloody wall.
"I will ask you again, who... was he?" He asked gently almost a whisper. But his eyes told me it was anything but.
He eas so close, his aura intense, urging me to speak. But I kept my mouth shut. No no, I wouldn't speak. I wouldn't give in. Not even because of the pain of the pressure, he was putting on me. Not even because of the hunger. Not even because of the fear and thrill that I felt race up and down my spine. Not for anything. I kept my mouth sewn shut.
My lips turned up slightly in amusement and rebellion.
"You won't share?" He asked gently stroking my face. He was scary. A whole other level of menace. And I would be lying if I said I didn't enjoy it. I even found him hot. His nonchalance and uncaring nature to me was new. I found him genuinely attractive for once. Whatever he was putting out it was working. He had cracked the secret formula.
I just stared back again. My slight smile was genuine this time, which drew his eyes to my lips and his hand crept up to the back of my neck ever so slowly, holding me tight. He approachedd me slowly, gently almost gracefully. I wished he would start squeezing so we could finally begin the fight I was waiting for. His touch almost left me in a trance. Is this the effect of the mate bond? Is this what he had been facing? Is this what happens if I let it?
"If you don't give it to me. I will have to take it from you." He said his voice deep, dark and melodious. I didn't register his words. There were like song lyrics to me. I heard the melody from far away but I couldn't hear the words. It was so seductive that I didn't notice his movement. Or maybe I didn't want to stop it. He leaned in ever so slowly. His lips hovering over mine. Almost. Almost there. Out noses and foreheads were touching.
Finally, I leaned, impatient. But he chuckled and turned away, not letting me kiss him. It was low and dark and so hot. I didn't know if I should be mortified by my behavior. Damn it all to hell and back. He learned in again and I lifted my head. Eagerly.
What was I doing? Damn even Zian didn't mind.
I thought for a second that he would kiss me. He held his face close to mine for a second. Stroking the back of my neck and one finger sliding up and down my face. Isn't it ironic that we connected the best when our enmity to each other had reached maximum levels? Our rage unbound? I closed myself and lost myself to his touch. I didn't care if he wounded me. As long as I didn't give him what he wanted. Besides Xavier would never hurt me.
He leaned in. It was minor that I wouldn't have noticed it over my beating heart if I want paying attention to it.
I lifted my head up again.
Just as I thought he would kiss me, he quickly changed direction and went for my neck.
Shock filled me as his teeth bit into my neck, warm blood seeped out of me and he sucked it in without hesitation. What?
WHAT?
I realized with horror as he marked me. Permanently. Marks between mates were always permanent. I just sat still shocked. And he took the opportunity to invade my mind and violate my privacy. He sorted through my memories, trying to find who 'the one was. I felt like my defenses were getting bent and broken, the marking giving him an unfair advantage.
But he wouldn't find out who did the deed of course because I didn't know either. Sam made sure of it.
"STOP!"I screamed pushing him away.
He didn't listen and he continued to suck in my blood. Using that primary advantage to see my thoughts. Even those blocked and locked away from myself.
I was powerless against it. The mate bond became stronger giving him full access. It crumbled against the strength of his invasion.
I struggles powerlessly and memories surfaced one by one, but it blurred Sam out of them. It was all I could do. I wouldn't let him have it.
But he had everything else. Everything that happened when I met him, my monster crush on him, my pain from his rejection, my phone call with Dex, my premature shift, my laying on the snow all alone at night shifting.
Even my time during my mom's coma, Dex's disgust. The fear of hiding underneath my bed afraid Sam would have me, the time I saw Jem and Blaze rolling around the kitchen floor muddied, kissing while stood there with an apron, my hands screaming in pain from Anastasia having boiled at as Blaze trained with Arcos downstairs, even my thoughts on the recent dates and how my opinion of him had improved. They all came out in no particular order.
Everything, everything, everything I was giving him.
Every single thought, emotion, and memory. I know what he was doing. He didn't want me to have options other than him, not anymore.
I could feel hot tears of anger, pain, and regret. This defeat. This defeat was massive. I tried to push him away but he was a boulder now against whom my strength didn't work against.
He wouldn't stop, he wouldn't stop violating my mind with his immovable presence. One that I couldn't do anything about. If he stayed long enough he would blend into the background and I wouldn't even notice him, I would get used to the pain.
Is this want mind link was like for new mates. Did it hurt the first time? No one told me anything about it. Or was it because he was forcing through me. Because of my resistance?
I couldn't stop as tears leaked out and soon I lost it all. Everything except Sam and the vampires' identity. Everything except my powers. Even my time in the human world. My strict training. What Sam put me through. It was all put on display.
And finally, Blaze got what he wanted.
My rape.
Knowing it was one thing. Accepting it for what it was. Seeing it objectively, the cruelty of it was another. The pain of acceptance. Or even taking it seriously. I could brisk past and ignore it till now. Not anymore.
The scene I had locked away in the darkest corners of my mind hoping no one would ever see it. Hoping I would never have to confront it, accept it. Never knowing who they were or what I was doing.
Blaze immediately stopped. He got what he wanted. He pulled back, his mouth dripping with blood.
"Luna!" He looked at me shocked at what he had just seen.
He looked blurred to me through the tears in my eyes. I never thought I would have to show such a shameful side to him. Such weakness. I wanted to kill him. Really, really, really hurt him now. If my hatred was anything before, it didn't compare to what I had now.
I shouldn't have thought I was more powerful than him. I should have known better. He was king after all. When he was marking me, even my powers wouldn't respond to me. Nothing responded to me. Not even my limbs.
He reached out for me again. Like he did earlier. The tender touch to my face.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" I shouted and growled. And looked at him with pure hatred.
He looked at my eyes, shocked by the emotion in them. He must see me like a puny animal now. One he could crush oh so easily. One with so many weaknesses, wounds, and scars. He would know all my big talk was just a bluff.
I could feel the mess he had left in my min. The unorderliness, the chaos. . My priorities were thrown to the back and my unprocessed memories were at the forefront. It was like someone had a war in mind and left, leaving the landscape damaged in its wake.
I clutched my head in pain. I didn't know which part was me and which was him anymore. But as soon as I found him I chucked him out and shut the mind link firmly this time. Maybe if I had never opened it, he wouldn't have had even any access even with the marking. Or maybe I was kidding myself.
The marking.
It still dripped down with blood, not healing, soaking my shirt.
Zian was growling within me. I was his now. I realized with finality. This bastard. I peered at him. He still looking at me with concern.
I hated him. I hated him.
I hated him.
If I could I would make him drop dead right here right now. If only I had regained my powers after the shock of it all and the starvation and blood loss of the past few days. It will be a while before that happened. If I had it, he would be writhing before me. No hesitation.
How unsightly I should seem. Screaming and trying to get away. All blood and tears and helpless screams. I looked at him through hooded eyes and growled at him to leave.
He did so, his face still in shock at everything he had seen on my mind.