"I think...I think I would've told you I was pregnant with him, as a way to try and make you stay." Y/n's voice was soft as she stared down at her lap.
"Oh..." was all Atsumu could say. The silence was now awkward between the two of them. It killed them both, wanting to ask each other questions but not daring to say a single word.
"What..." Y/n started again, making the both of them tense at her speaking up. "What would you have done.. If I did tell you?" She didn't remove her eyes from her lap as she could only leave them there, not wanting to look at him or outside. A fluttering yet nauseating feeling settled in her stomach which made her shift in her seat.
He opened his mouth for a moment, before slowly closing it. He furrowed his brows, thinking hard about the question.
What would he do?
Would he be overjoyed?
Distressed?
Be in denial?
Or would they end up fighting?
Atsumu frowned at that idea, but he didn't deny it. They both were adults the year they broke up which was 2015. But they were both still too young, still fresh out of their teenage years. He didn't want to think about the horrible things his younger self would say to Y/n if she would tell him.
"I don't know..." is what he finally responded with.
But he was only met with silence by Y/n. It went silent again between the two of them. But Atsumu was now the curious one.
"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.
"That I was pregnant?" The female questioned.
"Yeah.." He glanced at the woman who stared down at her hands. "I understand if you don't want to tell me of course."
"No its..." He listened as she let out her third shaky breath. "Its fine..." She quietly reassured.
She stayed silent for a bit which Atsumu didn't mind before she spoke up.
"I was scared..." Her voice was soft when she answered, he almost didn't hear her. "Its silly but...I thought you knew so that's why you left me." She scoffed at her idiocy, thinking back on it.
"Then again, you were slow with most things besides volleyball." She joked, making Atsumu slightly smile.
"There was this.. Unsettling feeling in me that didn't want me to tell you. When my mom found out, she practically begged me to tell you" she chuckled softly.
"I actually almost told you. I dialed your number but I just...I just stared at your name, wondering; 'Will he pick up?', 'What happens when he picks up?', 'What if he doesn't pick up?'. Just a bunch of what if's really. At some point I just...Wussed out." She chuckled bitterly to herself.
"I was terrified. I didn't know the first thing to raising a baby..." She balled her fist, clenching her shirt in the process.
Atsumu glanced over at her before looking back on the road. He wanted to hold her hand, but he hesitated.
"What about these past four years then?" He starts. "You could've called me then, I'm sure we were both mature enough." He added.
"I didn't want to ruin your reputation." She answered. "I heard you were part of a pro volleyball team at that time and just...I felt like.. I felt like if I told you during your prime time, I would burden you with the fact that you have a child that you never knew about..." Y/n crossed her arms, her whole body starting to feel cold.
Atsumu stayed quiet as he listened to her.
"There was never a time that I didn't think of you, especially since he reminds me of you in some aspects. I always wondered what would have happened if I told you beforehand. Would you come and see him for yourself? Or would he be the reason that we end up really falling apart..." Y/n stared out the window, not wanting to look at the man that drove the car.
"I know it was wrong of me to keep him from you all this time, and I don't have an excuse..." she dug her nails into her arm, biting down on the inside of her cheek.
She soon felt a hand on hers. Looking over, Atsumu drove with one hand while his other hand gently squeezed her tense one.
"I think I can understand a bit." he softly reassured. "Getting trapped in a corner and having very little options yet having such a big impact."
She couldn't help but smile a bit at his comforting action.
Untangling her arms, she took his hand in hers. She outlined the lines on his palm before interlocking her slightly smaller hand with his calloused ones.
"Thank you for understanding..." she quietly said. "And I'm sorry..." she squeezed his hand, making him squeeze hers back.
"It's fine. I know now, that's all that matters." he brought her hand over and gently kissed her knuckles, making her chuckle softly.
"Such a romantic." she smiled.
"Only for you." Atsumu glanced at her, a smile on his lips.
Although the ride had felt long and somewhat suffocating, it turned into a comforting long ride back home.
Atsumu parked the car in the parking lot. The two adults getting out of the car, Y/n unbuckled Koji and pulled him into her arms.
"Mommy...?" Koji mumbled.
"Yes love?" the female hummed softly while closing the door.
"Home?" he murmured, nuzzling his face into the crook of her neck.
She chuckled softly, gently rubbing his back in small circles.
"Yeah, we're home" she answered.
Atsumu picked up her bag, having put her instrument in there too. Digging for her keys, he was able to feel the small metallic key in his hand. Taking it out of the bag, the three went over to the apartment and opened the door.
"I can get the car seat, just go put him to bed." the blond stated.
"Can you do it?" She looked at him with amusement as he hesitated. Chuckling, she walked over to him. "Just take him to bed, I'll go get the car seat."
Atsumu stared at her before glancing at Koji.
"Can.. Can I...?" he was hesitant on taking the boy. Of course he always had the thought of picking him up, but not this fast.
"Of course." she gave him a reassuring smile. "You're..." she hesitated to speak while Atsumu waited for her to continue. Glancing at Koji to make sure he was asleep, she looked at Atsumu, a smile etched on her lips. "You're his dad after all." she softly stated.
He could feel his heart slam against his chest hearing her words.
A dad.
He really is a dad and this isn't just some dream.
"Are you crying?" her smile turned into an amused one. The volleyball player quickly wiped at his face, looking away.
"I just got somethin' in my eye." he excused.
"Right." she chuckled. "Go ahead and take him." she stated.
"Right." Atsumu awkwardly held out his hands as Y/n handed Koji over to him.
He couldn't help but feel awkward, questioning if he was holding him correctly or not. It wasn't long until the male stiffened at the small boy in his arms move a bit.
"Relax, you're doing just fine." the h/c haired female smiled at him. "Just settle him down in my bed, I'll be inside shortly after." she told the male.
He nodded as she left to go get the toddler's car seat. Slowly walking inside, he headed straight to her bedroom. Opening the door quietly, he made sure to not drop the boy before walking towards the bed.
Staring at the large bed, Atsumu hesitated to put Koji down, wanting to hold onto him a little longer. But also, he didn't know how to put him down without waking him up.
Hearing the sound of the front door closing, he looked over and saw Y/n walking over towards her bedroom.
"Need help putting him down?" she smiled, looking over at him.
"Nah I...I got it." Atsumu smiled at her before looking glancing at the black mop of hair that was snuggled in his neck. Slowly, he set the small boy down and pulled the blanket over his small frame.
He moved his hair a bit until he was taken aback by the sudden action Koji had pulled. The toddler had nuzzled against the man's hand.
"Do you want a tissue?" Y/n teased.
"Stop ruinin' the moment." Atsumu grumbled, making the female snicker. Gently ruffling the boy's head, the two adults exited the bedroom and walked towards the front door.
"Thanks for driving us back." the female said.
"It's the least I can do." the blond smiled.
Handing Atsumu the car keys, he opened the front door.
"I'll see you tomorrow?" he looks at her.
"Maybe." she smiled at him.
The two stayed quiet, none of them wanting the other to leave.
"Thanks again." Y/n started. "For listening and understanding."
"It's the most I could do." Atsumu smiled. Hesitating for a moment, he reached out and gently grabbed her hand, rubbing his thumb against her fingers.
"You've become quite mature." she smiled as she went closer to the male, not minding the intimate affection.
"Have I?" he gave a smug look, making Y/n roll her eyes.
"I change my mind." she stated.
"Ah c'mon!" he whined.
The two laughed as they got closer to one another.
Staring into each other's eyes, they slowly leaned in, Atsumu cupping her face with one hand. Before they knew it, they closed what little gap was left.
The kiss was short and sweet.
Pulling away, they stared at each other for another second until the female was the first to look away, clearing her throat in the process.
"You should get going." she told him.
"Ah, yeah." he responded.
The two took a step back away from each other, both of them a bit flustered at the sudden kiss.
"I'll uh...See you later." rubbing the back of his neck, he glanced at the female who had a small smile on her lips.
"Yeah, see you later." she looked over, making eye contact with him.
Staring into each other's eyes, Y/n playfully pushed him outside.
"Go before you get scolded by Osamu." she smiled.
"Yeah yeah." he waved his hand, a smile making it's way to his face as well.
Before he left, he glanced over at her as she was leaning against the doorframe.
"Can I at least have one more kiss?" he grinned.
"Just go!" she waved him away making him chuckle.
They waved goodbye to each other until Atsumu was long gone. Smiling, Y/n closed the door, locking it in the process.
Walking towards her bedroom, she stopped for a moment and pressed her fingers to her lips, a large smile starting to appear on her face.
Shaking her head, she chuckled softly, getting into bed with her sleeping son.
"What a dork."
The next morning, Y/n had helped Koji take a quick bath as she left him to get himself dress with the clothes she left out for him. Taking a quick shower herself, she threw some casual clothes onto herself.
"Ready to go Koji?" she questions the boy.
"Yup!" he chimed with a smile.
Looking over, she noticed that the boy had put on his shirt backwards and was wearing his shoes the wrong way. Chuckling softly, she picked him up and sat him down on the bed.
"You put your shirt and shoes on wrong silly" she gently booped his nose, making him giggle. "Hands up" she told him which he obediently listened.
Lifting his arms up, she took the shirt off him before properly putting it on him.
"Remember, the paper part will always be on the back." she reminded while taking off his shoes. "And make sure to match shoes with your feet." she smiled and tickled his feet which he giggled at.
Putting his shoes on correctly, he jumped off the bed and quickly grabbed his bag.
"C'mon mommy! We gotta go before we're late!" he exclaimed.
"I'm coming I'm coming" Y/n chuckled softly and followed the boy, grabbing his lunch on the counter she had made for him.
Waiting for her at the front door, he watched as the female closed the door behind her and locked it. He turned his back towards her as he felt her open his backpack and putting his lunch in before zipping it back up.
Helping him inside the car, she buckled him up and closed the door. Getting into the car herself, she put her seatbelt on and started the engine before driving off to drop of Koji at the daycare.
"Bye mommy!!" Koji grinned, waving at his mom who waved back at him, smiling as he ran off to catch up to his friends.
Hearing her phone go off, Y/n looked at her phone and frowned, reading the text.
"Ah geez..."