That was...weird.
I came to see Jade after her not showing up hours ago. She always showed when she said she would, especially to visit the kids—Calen who's she's the Godmother to.
I felt I needed to visit with Chloe and Calen and image my surprise when their nanny Lynn didn't allow me inside to wake my own best friend. Granted, Jade doesn't like being woke up, but she would've definitely made an exception for myself and the kids.
That door shutting in my face worried me. I even tried to call her twice and reached her voicemail. It was something I had to call Joie and Andi about while I was on the road, while Calen watched his tablet with his headphones, Chloe slept in her car seat, and I talked on the phone.
"And Lynn just shut the door in your face?" Andi's voice spoke through my car's speakers, "That is weird."
"It's not weird to me," Joie said secondly. "I know what's going on."
"Did you call her, Care?"
"I did. She didn't answer. It goes straight to voicemail."
Andi had a suggestion. "I think we should have a intervention or something."
"That's not gonna work." Joie responded quickly, "We do that she's only going to shut down. Believe me, I know."
Silence takes over the line for a moment. That is until I had a question. "How should we handle it, Joie?"
"As delicate as possible." Joie answered. "Listen, if she doesn't tell us out of her mouth what's going on that I already know, she's not about to leave him. It will be a waste of time. She gotta do this herself. And honestly, I love her, but I'm not gonna waste my breath if she's insisted on staying with him. Situations like that will get outsiders hurt before the one going through it."
"You're right about that," Andi agreed.
"I agree, too, but..." I shook my head as if they could see me. "I can't not talk to her about it. Or at least try. What happened today really bothered me. I can't let this go."
Joie sighed. "Do what you think you gotta do, Care. I gotta go."
The rush in Joie's voice made confusion appear on my face. "Where are you at, Jojo?"
"Picking up Misty, she's sick. Gotta go." Joie hung up, leaving Andi and me on the line.
"What was that about?" I wondered, "And don't say you don't know because I know Joie tells you everything before Jade and me."
"I don't know anything either, Caren." Andi said as I pulled into the parking lot of the Uptown hotel.
"Ok, I gotta go. I need to carry these kids up here."
"Ok, kiss them for me."
"Got you."
Our call ends as I fully parked between two trucks. I was gathering everything I need from the passenger seat when Calen realized we made it to the place we've been calling our home for two weeks long.
"I thought we see Aunty Jay-Jay?" Calen asked.
"Aunty Jay-Jay was tired. We'll see her next time." I promised, stepping out of the car and opening the back door Chloe's car seat was located. "Can you grab Coco's bag for me baby?"
Calen grunted low, lifting the diaper bag. "Yeah, me got it. Can I come around?"
"Yeah, before careful."
I unbuckled Chloe's seatbelt as Calen ran around to stand beside me. I pulled out her carseat, looping my arm under the handle that rests on the inside of my elbow. I closed the door, locking it, and held Caleb's hand and we pushed forward towards the hotel.
"Mommy, can we order pizza?" Calen asked as we approached the hotel.
"You can order whatever you like, dad."
"Yes!" Calen's happiness about little things made me smile.
We entered the hotel's luxurious lobby when Calen suddenly let go of my hand and bolted forward.
"Calen!" I hollered after him, but I looked ahead to him being raised into an embrace by Xavier. He was near the elevator and I could admit he looked handsome in the simple outfit he wore, but I'll be damn if I say that out loud.
Xavier approached me, smiling and positioning Calen on one hip. "Waddup, beautiful wife?"
I ignored Xavier, allowing him to take the car seat from my hand, and approaching the elevator. We got on immediately and rode up to the grand presidential suite. It was the largest suite in the hotel. The grand foyer greeted me as we walked in. Xavier took the kids up the spiral staircase to the second bedroom, while I went to the furnished living room and tossed my keys on the coffee table. I was annoyed as I looked out the floor-to-ceiling picture windows that overlooked the garden courtyard.
After a moment I could hear Xavier's footfalls. "Why are you here?"
"Hello to you, too."
I whipped around as he sat on the plush colored sofa. "This isn't a joke, Xavier. We are getting a divorce. You cannot keep popping up over here as if—"
"As if what, we still married?" Xavier chuckled as he stared at me. "We are still married, Caren."
"Because you won't sign the goddamn divorce papers!" I whispered harshly to prevent myself from yelling.
Xavier groaned, dropping his head back. "You still on that?"
My expression frowned. "What do you fucking mean? Yes, I'm still on it, Xavier. You should be, too. I didn't pay a attorney to fucking play with you. I didn't file for this to be some joke. You and I are done."
He dismissed me. "Get outta here. Just go pack and let's go home."
"Your home; not mine or my children." I responded, "You tryna hold this divorce off as much as you can and I'm sick of it. I'm tryna do it short and sweet—no courts, no custody battle. Everything I deserve is in the papers. Sign it and let's move on."
"Oh, I read whatchu say you deserve." he eyed me, "Alimony, paying for you to get your Doctorate's. You feel you deserve that?"
"I feel I deserve more, but I'm being lenient." I walked forward, standing in front of him as he sat down. "Giving up my life so you can play pro was a big part of it. I'm prepared to do this easily, Xavier. Don't make this hard."
Xavier stood up, towering above me. "And you thinkin' you'll win against me?"
"You had the affair and numerous fuck buddies. Let's not forget the affair that got the bitch pregnant."
"Oh, Caren," he brushed my chin with his thumb, "I have more than enough money to make that information go away. That's the difference between me and you. I got the money."
"And the difference between me and you..." I stabbed my finger in his chest, "I'm the mother and the world hearing out my mouth that you paid for that information to go away, left me alone at night both of my last pregnancy's to cheat on me; the world is gonna eat that shit the fuck up. And the world loves a good story on you selfish, rich mufuckas that think you're untouchable."
Our stare was intense.
A smirk builds on his lips. "That's the route tryna go?"
"If I have to, yes." I reply knowing it's something I really don't want to do. "I don't wanna put our kids through any of that mess, Xavier, especially Zay. He's going to college in a few months and we don't need it being read on line. Or the students or faculty worried more about us than him."
"Ok, you really want this divorce?"
"Yes, I do."
Xavier locked eyes with me attentively for a long moment. He tucked in his lips as he walked away to the window, staring out. My eyes followed him, watching as he stood in silence. He finally turned around and said, "Okay, you want this divorce and return back to a Anderson, you gone it. I'll sign 'em tonight. You'll hear from my lawyer."
"Xavier, it doesn't have to be like that."
"But it is," he retorted quickly. "I'm picking up my kid's tomorrow."
Xavier disappeared on the other side of the hotel's door as it closed. I exhaled sharply, pulling my curls back and groaned. I pulled out my phone to call Jade again. But I received the same result—her voicemail. . .
Later in the day, a large pepperoni pizza and bowl of grilled chicken salad sat on the table for Calen and me to eat on, with Chloe in her Fisher-Price cradle swing.
I heard the hotel's door close and Zay came into view. "There's pizza and salad here." I informed when I notice the person behind him, "Andi. What're you doing here?"
"Bored. Annoyed. Stressed." Andi replied, rolling her eyes.
Zay leaned over hugging me. "Imma eat after I shower."
"Okay sweetie."
Zay leaves the kitchen and disappeared.
Andi picked up Chloe after sanitizing her hands. "This beautiful baby."
"I handsome. Me sister beautiful." Calen spoke as he ate on his slice of pizza.
Andi came around, sitting down. "Yes you are, Ca."
"So, why are you stressed and bored and annoyed?" I asked.
"Bored, because I just go off thirty minutes ago and have no one at home to talk to. Stressed and annoyed, because, well, Jarvis keeps blowing up my phone after I packed his stuff and sent it to him weeks ago."
Speaking about the man Andi had an affair with would never sit right with me, especially with me being married—soon-to-be divorced—But I'm taking Jade and Joie's advice into consideration. Andi's all that we have and she needs to vent to someone.
"Guess he doesn't get the hint." I responded.
She was staring at Chloe and I could tell she had more on her mind.
I breathe out. "Joie's busy, Jade's ghost. Just say it. No judgment."
Andi sighed softly as she looked away from Chloe and to me. "Is it wrong that...I miss him?"
Of course it is.
"Well, you gave two years of heart to him; even if he's not yours, you clearly loved him.So, no, it's not wrong that you miss him. But, you can't go back and allow yourself to be second place for no man. Not even him."
"I know. I don't plan on it." She voiced, "I hate I done it to begin with. But, you live and you learn."
"Yes you do."
My phone rung on the table, interrupting our conversation. I seen it was my divorce attorney, excusing myself from the table for privacy.
"Hey, Susie." I answered, "If you're wondering if he signed the divorce papers, he did not."
"Yes, actually, he did, Caren."
I smile lightly. "Okay, soo, why don't you sound a little more excited?"
"Because, his attorney called, he has agreed with child support only. As far as the alimony and child support, he's filing for sole custody and will only pay you alimony if you agree that the children live under his roof."
That bombshell dropped my heart. "Wait, what? H-he can't do that, right? He can do that?"
"Yes, he can, Caren."
I took a deep breath, shutting my eyes for a second. "Be honest with me, Susie, how great of a chance does he has to gain custody?"
"If I'm being honest, Caren, there's a very high chance." Susie was truthful and I was grateful, but it only stressed me further than I already was. "But I am going to fight for you. Use everything I have for your children to stay with you."
I nodded as if Susie could witness. "Of course. It's all we can do. Fuck it, take the alimony away. But he's not having sole custody of my kids. They don't know anyone better than me."
"Yes ma'am."
"Thank you, Susie." I hung up and turned around.
Andi must've felt my energy because she stood there appearing worried. "What did he do now?"
"He's trying to take my kids, Andi." My eyes watered, "Goddamit! He cannot take my kids."
Andi walked over, hugging me. "Caren, he's not."
I pulled back, sniffling. "I'm not confident about that anymore."
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