𝚃𝚆: 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚜𝚝 (𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜), 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚔 𝚎𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢.
𝚆𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜: 1.2𝚔
Fandom: Harry Potter
In your admittedly short life, there had only been two constants: Cedric Diggory, and your love for him.
There was no love from your family. Your mother had died giving birth to your sibling; losing the baby too. Your father hadn't coped well with the loss; he became a recluse, rarely leaving his study and library - throwing himself into his work with a newfound passion and determination as if his work could bring back his deceased wife and child from an illness that also affects muggles. You would only see him once a day on an evening through tea where the relationship would be close to a business partnership than a father/daughter relationship.
You were looked after; by the nannies, and the tutors - they made sure you were clean, that you ate, and taught you your ABC's. They sang you to sleep after a nightmare. They covered the role of a parent whilst your remaining one couldn't handle it. But after a while, they moved on - to new families, to new posts; whatever, they simply moved on, leaving you behind. It didn't take long for your definition of love to have a deadline.
Your love for Cedric surprised you. You didn't think you would ever feel this way about someone. You didn't think you were capable of feeling the emotion but when you looked into his grey eyes, you knew that you had fallen in love with him. It seeped out of every pore; it took over your veins. On your more dramatic days, you were certain that your heartbeat in time to the syllables of his name.
His love for you surprised you more. Everything you felt for him was reflected in his eyes, in his actions. He was wary in the beginning after you had opened up about your upbringing, but you warmed up to him quickly. Soon enough, he couldn't keep his hands off you. Life at Hogwarts became easier after Cedric; happy to have someone love you.
It was teenage infatuation personified through make-out sessions in dark corners and supply cupboards.
And all through it, you waited. You waited for him to change his mind; to leave and move on because that's what always happens when you love someone. There's a deadline; there's only so much they can take before they're gone.
Cedric would kiss away those worries; whispering promises of forever and eternity, and for a while, those fears disappeared.
Then he became distant; not listening as you asked him about his day or told him about yours. His mind always somewhere else; thinking of something else. Physically, he would be in the room, but mentally, you didn't know where he was. He wouldn't hold you in bed now; instead, you rolled onto your sides, back to the other. The gap between you the personification of the gaping void in your relationship. The gap between you a roaring expanse, with him on one side and you on the other, that you had no hope of crossing.
Something had changed.
The small voice in the back of your mind reminded you of the deadline. It reminded you that your love was way past it and that the inevitable was coming.
"I've met someone else," He says on a Thursday afternoon; the sky grey and the rain drizzling.
"Oh?" You say, expecting this conversation.
The worry had settled in your gut like a lead balloon, but the acceptance of the end of your relationship settled deeper; settled within your bones, within the very fiber of your being. You would question yourself - why aren't you leaving him? Why haven't you left yet? The answer was always the same: I selfishly love him; I don't want him to go.
But your time was up.
"I didn't mean to, it just happened."
"It's okay, I understand, Cedric. You can leave, they always do." You smile at him, but it's empty. This conversation wasn't new to you; having heard it a thousand times before from nannies and tutors. For this conversation, you had retreated within yourself.
"Don't do this."
"Cedric, I won't stand in the way of your happiness. You've found someone who makes you happy, and not only that, I bet your family approves. It's a win-win situation."
His family had never approved of your relationship with him; not after you declined them meeting your father. Your father wouldn't know where to begin with social interactions after so long isolated. It was for their benefit, you promised, but after that, a chip had remained on their shoulder.
"I don't want to hurt you."
You run a hand down his cheek, "You aren't hurting me. It's been over for a while, hasn't it? I've felt; you've felt it. You were the only one who did something about it."
"I want you to keep the flat."
"Nonsense. I'll pack my things now and move back in with my father. He won't notice the extra addition."
"How are you taking this so well? Why aren't you angry? Why aren't you fighting?" He demands, anger lacing his tone.
You shrug your shoulders, "Cedric, I have known for weeks that there has been someone new in your life but you're too honorable to say anything. The relationship was over when you met her, and it's okay. I'm used to people leaving me, but I'm going to leave now. I want you to be happy, darling."
"I'm sorry," He whispers, the fight leaving him in an instant.
He's sorry. He's sorry for not keeping the promise he made so long ago when he was a teenager in love. He's sorry for not staying; for not loving you as he should. He's so sorry for falling in love with someone else when he was in a relationship with you.
He's sorry, but to him, his apology isn't good enough. It won't ever repair what you had; it won't ever bridge the gap that he had let grow between the two of you.
Cedric remains in the living room as you pack your things; allowing you the privacy to collect your thoughts and your clothes. The photo on your dresser is wrapped in a scarf and placed in your bag. If you were to keep a memento it would be this one; a photograph of you and Cedric in Hogsmeade on a snowy day. Taken by one of his friends and cherished by you ever since.
Cedric could decide what he wanted to do with the rest of it all. But you were keeping the photograph.
He stands as you enter the room; his face stoic.
You turn to him before you leave, your hand lingering on the door handle. "Ced, will you promise me one thing?"
The use of his nickname brings tears to his eyes, "Anything."
"Be happy."
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You apparate back to the mansion in which you were raised. It never has been nor will it ever be your home, but you apparate back there to see the light to your father's study still bright. In your third year of life, he had a bed moved in there to make it easier to work; to keep him separate from you.
Your suitcase gets heavier and heavier the closer you get to the house. A physical reminder of the end of your relationship with Cedric.
It was over; he had found someone new, and you were happy for him.
The heartache would come later when night had fallen and your mind finally silent. The heartache would come then, crashing over you - making it hard to breathe, to think, to do anything.
The deadline had come and gone. You were happy for the extra time that you did have.