Light of Mine (RusAme)

Chapter 28

I don't want to. I want to change his mind and make him see a new side to the coin. I want to make my dream a reality. 

I want...

Those are words I haven't seen in a while. 

Well, anyways, I'll stop writing now. Heck, I'm already on the second page. 

Until next time,

-America

I shut the pages closed, and placed the booklet back in my dresser with my red book that was now missing a page. 

I sighed and sank into the bedding. Coupled with this and my states, I'm all over the place.

The states...they would be overjoyed to know that I don't want to be single any longer. Especially California, Hawaii, and I know some others would be hooting and hollering about it as well. 

I frowned. I missed them. I've known that for a while, but it hasn't truly set in until now. I missed their races, their jokes, their competitive nature. 

No, wait, I could live without that last one. But, I still missed them.

This reminded me a lot of a prior event. When Confederate died, I longed to go back in time and change what he became. Instead of a manipulative, gun-loading, fowl-mouthed lunatic, he could've stayed a dad, my brother, someone who I would work together with. 

It's probably better this way though, who knows what would have happened if you didn't win. 

I shook my head, thinking about that made me feel sad and like I had failed in some way. So, I let my mind drift to a happier place. 

So naturally, it decided that one country made it happier than others. And that was Russia. 

When he wasn't snarling at you to move, I found him to be calming. No, I think steady is a better word to describe him. Even if he was a bit unpredictable at times, he always had an underlying reason for doing something. 

In a way, I admired that. 

I huffed, feelings were too complicated, who knows if I even have a crush on him. I could just like the fact that we can get along without a chair ending up half-way across the room. 

What does crush even mean?

I furrowed my eyebrows, while I grabbed my phone and typed that exact question in. 

A crush is an infatuation with something a person has. This can be their appearance, habits, or anything else that the specific person has. Crushes usually last for a short period of time, but it depends on how intense the feelings are. 

I took a deep breath in, "Well, that was informational." 

"Vhat vas?" My eyes widened and darted to the closed door, which wasn't so closed anymore. 

Russia was standing in the entrance with some normal attire on. I couldn't stop my heart from racing, and I was glad that I didn't say anything else out loud that he could've over heard. 

"Nothing, nothing. I was just looking at an article on, uh..." I quickly looked around the room in hopes of finding something. When nothing showed up, I improvised. "Frogs! Yeah, it was on the dangers of poisonous frogs. But I already knew everything in there, so it was useless." 

He gave me a skeptical look, but didn't say anything about it. 

"So," I awkwardly started. "What're you here for?"