It's Molly and not Trolly

Overwhelming

4

I shot up, tooke my things and sprinted through the hallway out of this room. Miss Anderson didn't come anyways. I ran to the toilets. I took a random cabin and locked the door. Thank god no one needs to use the bathroom.

After controlling my breath from this marathon, I can't hold back my tears anymore. This was just to much.
My lips started trembling, my eyes started watering and the first sobs are following.
Now everything is just so overwhelming I am crying harder than ever.

I can't control my crying, my breathing, my volume or my movements.

I didn't notice packing out my "first-aid-kit". I was looking for my razor blade. Ah, there it is.

The razor blade touched my skin. I pointed it to my skin and let it sink in slowly. The burn and the pain gave the skin become goosebumpsy.
I let my skin get used to the feeling.
Now I pull it out.
I apply the blade to my skin again and pulled another time.
Then another time.
And another time
Once again
Twice again.

I'm numb. Neither do I feel the physical pain or the pain Chase and other people cause me day for day. I don't feel anything.

Am I even worth enough to feel anything?

My lip started trembling again.
My sobs and crying follow.

I am not even worth breathing.
Why not just end everything?
Where this shit began is where I am going to end this.

But not today. I am leaving with a bang! Everyone will remember me.

I packed up my blades cleaned my wound and put a bandage around my leg.
Yes. My leg. Doesn't mean i don't do that on my Arms aswell but I have my reasons.

I grabbed my bag and hurried back to class. I am 5 minutes late which will cause a lot of trouble but what needed to be done is now done.

My class right now is geography which i am absolutely amazing at - not to sound stupid - but my teacher as usually does not want to - i dont know- accept that?

I ignored the dumb comments or disgusted stares or some creepy whispers.
Let's just hope school will be over soon..

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FINALLYYY!!!

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I am heading home changing into my work clothes and than off to work.
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Arriving at the diner I can already see the trucks and cars everywhere. Awww man. My day was absolut trash. Why does my evening needs to be destroyed too.

Alright Molly, a little motivation pleaseee!!
Okay motivated after being suicidal.. Easy.

With my head held high, I am entering the Diner. The warmth wraps around my body.
I can spot people from school sitting in a booth still not having food or drinks oh damn.. Why do they have to be in my area.
Maybe Louise will serve them. Oh pretty please.. I can already sense a disaster.

I'm walking to the back of the Diner to wash my hands. I dried them turned around and walkes to the front. Let's go..