ALONE.. Remus sanders angst||completed

chapter seventeen||going insane

TW Intrusive thoughts, hallucinations, panic attacks, death, blood, murder, tell me if i missed anything, and i apologize in advance as this is a very angsty one.

After talking with Roman I took some time to come up with a plan. I knew what i was generally going to do but I needed a better plan, and now I have one.

I turn invisible and sink down to the light side, it appears that Remus just woke up, perfect. I notice that Remus is very zoned out so i start not the small by giving him horrible intrusive thoughts. It didn't take long before he was having a full blown panic attack and was screaming, it was really entertaining to watch. Logan calmed him down and everything seems fine, for now. But i'll leave him be for an hour or two then I'll come back.

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After Remus's panic attack Patton suggested a movie to calm everyone down. He let Remus pick and so he chose the classic beauty and the beast as it was one of his favorites since he was a child. Everything was ok till the scene where everyone tries to kill the beast, that only triggered more things he could do to the others and he panicked again. Janus was the first to take notice so he immediately went to ease his panic while Patton paused it.

Remus's panic did calm quite a bit when he saw.... A figure? It wasn't the one in his dreams he knew that. The figure was merely a silhouette with glowing orange eyes and a creepy smile. The figure walked behind him and told him things which triggered his intrusive thoughts again. Remus looked around the room and didn't see the light sides but other figures with orange eyes telling him similar things.

When the others tried to calm Remus it only made it worse, he didn't see the light sides and he didn't hear how they were trying to help, no, he saw black silhouettes telling him horrible things, and every time they approached him he thought they were going to hurt him.

Out of pure panic he summoned his Morningstar and got defensive, swinging it at anyone who got close.

The others close very much tell that something else was going on then before, but they didn't know what, and they didn't know what to do. Anything they tried to say to Remus went unheard and anytime they got close he'd attack them. They were scared, and so was he.

Remus's head was constantly moving looking around the room. He wasn't at the light side anymore, he didn't know where he was but he wasn't safe. He was backing up and ended up bumping into something but when he looked behind him he didn't see anything, to the light sides there was a table but to him there was nothing. His panic kept on increasing.

Tears were streaming down his face and collecting in his eyes which didn't help him see any better. The others saw as this all unfolded before them, not even Logan knew what to do. But Remus ended up passing out due to everything.

Janus jogged over to Remus, picked him up and carried him over to the couch and placed him there. They all discussed what might have happened, but they didn't have much information other than what they saw, they couldn't even make out anything that Remus was saying. So they just have to wait to ask.

Despite how long Remus has been out Janus never left his side, the others though did other things while waiting for him to wake up as they grew a little inpatient.

While the others were doing their things Remus was having nightmare after nightmare, horrific images dancing through his mind locking him in this box of terror with no escape. Janus of course noticed this as Remus was stirring and crying, he didn't know what to do but he had an idea. Janus just layed Remus's head on his lap and combed his fingers through his hair and gave him a little massage.

It took a few moments but it was working a little bit, so Janus continued. He never got him fully calm but even a little progress is still progress.

This went on for several minutes then Remus started getting worse again. His nightmares were clouding his mind, and blocking his senses, distorting them. Much to Janus's surprise Remus blotted up from his sleep, now wide awake. Remus's vision was mostly black as he looked around the room, not seeing nor hearing Janus behind him.

What he could see was not real, what he saw was everyone scattered around the room dead one way or another. He looked down and there was blood on his hands and all over his body. He killed them. He heard something to the side of him and saw the black figure from before, his orange eyes staring into Remus's when he turned around.

"You did this." was all he said.

That sentence played in his mind over and over and over. He pressed his hands over his ears, slammed his eyes shut and screamed. As he did this his senses started coming back and he felt something on his back. He stopped screaming and opened his eyes when he swung his head behind him and saw Janus?

It took a few seconds for his vision to completely return but it did, and when it did he was very confused. He thought Janus was dead. He looked around the room, no bodies, he looked at his hands, no blood. Was he dreaming? He could have sworn he was awake.

"J-Janus?" Remus said, new tears falling down his face. "I-I Thought you were..."

"Remus please breathe for me. Make your breathing with mine." Janus says then does the breathing trick, Remus follows along but takes multiple tries to do it right.

"Now Remus can you please explain to me what happened after we watched the movie?" Janus asks. Remus goes into his memories.

"I remember a black figure with glowing orange eyes and then there was more of them a-and i got scared and summoned my morningstar and then i woke up here and everyone was there and t-they were all dead a-and the blood was on my hands and i killed everyone-" Remus saying thinking back at the horrific scenes.

"Remus please calm down!" Janus says freaking but then two seconds later realizes that won't help. "Remus breathe." He does the breathing trick with Remus again.

After Remus calms down again he explains what happened a little slower and in more detail. What Janus hears concerns him. He was seeing things that weren't there of course he was concerned.

Eventually the two fell silent as there were no questions to ask and no answers to give so they relaxed a little. Remus tried to think of something actually entertaining to him but whenever he did it would always come back to hurting the others or the things he saw, so he stopped trying to entertain himself and he found himself once again in his empty state. he thought and felt nothing but this was nothing new to him at this point, so he let it be.

Everything was fine till Remus could swear he could hear breathing in his ear, but he couldn't feel it. So he turned his head around and there stood the black figure from before, creepy smile and all. Remus wanted to jump back or hit him or even scream but he froze. He was frozen and couldn't look away from the figure in front of him. The figure made a small giggle.

"If you're not careful everything you saw will be true." Is all he said and then disappeared right before Remus's eyes. And what he said...

Drove Remus insane.