Chasing In The Dark

13

I wait, naghintay ako sa mga araw na nagdaan na magpakita siya at lumitaw. I was in the urge to let go and stop hoping of something that he will still come and explain to me everything. But then he came, and like what i said i embraced him. I embraced him like he didn't do something wrong. Like he didn't lie on something that will made me hurt and down.

"Kamusta ka?"

I asked him. Pinaupo ko siya sa gilid ko, habang nakaupo kaming dalawa sa gilid nang kama.

His emotions was evident. I can read it, i can see it. It was full of happiness, joy but their was something bothering him inside. I don't know what but im hoping that he will share it to me. Even though we both knew na walang kasiguraduhan kung ano talaga kami. We kissed, we already did sex but still we don't have labels. Should i call it fuckbudies?

"I should ask you that."

He hugged me tightly, i replied to his tight hug on me. Ramdam ko ang halik niya sa ulo ko, pang ilang beses niya iyong ginawa kaya natawa ako. I punched him on his chest, not to strong pero sakto lang para umaray siya.

"Stop that. We need to talk."

Natatawang usal ko. Hindi siya nakinig ginagawa parin niya ang ginagawa niya sa akin kanina.

"I missed you so bad, baby. It's making me crazy."

Napangiti ako.

I want to asked him, if he really missed me why didn't he visit me early? Why didn't he showed as early as he can? He's free, no rules no regulations to follow to guards following him his all free but still he didn't not visit me. But i don't want to disturbed our moments, i don't want to disturb him by my questions. Kaya napagdesisyunan ko nalang na tumahimik. That's the good thing that i should do, right?

"What's bothering you?"

Umiling ako sa tanong niya.

"It's just nothing."

Pero ramdam ko ang tingin niya sa akin, ramdam ko ang mga mata niya sa akin ang mga malaseryoso niyang mga mata na minsan ko lang makita. And this day is one of it. Ganun lang siya hanggang sa tumakbo ang oras. Walang nagplanong magbukas nang topic sa aming dalawa. No one dare to cut the silents between us.

I sighed.

"May sasabihin kaba sa akin?"

I asked him bravely. I need the all strength i needed. Nilanghap ko na ang hangin para maging handa sa sasabihin niya sa akin kung sakaling sasabihin niya sa akin ang totoo. Maybe he will tell me the thruth. Mag iisang taon na kaming magkasama, kilala na namin ang isa't isa. No. No, we don't know each other that much. I doesn't even know who really his, ang alam ko lang sakanya ay ang ugali niya at ang appearance niyang halos perpekto na.

Siguro hindi ito ang tamang panahon. We meet each other at the wrong time, or we really meet each other to learn somethings. Na hindi lahat nang gusto nang tao ay nakukuha ito, hindi lahat nang gusto nang tao ay napapasakanya. Minsan kung sino pa ang ayaw mo at kung ano pa ang ayaw mo yun ang napapasayo. That's what they called expect the unexpected, and that motto was right.

"Do i?"

Clueless is evident in his face but it was opposit in his eyes. His eyes was full of sorrow, pleased and lie. Hindi ko natagalan ang pagtitig sa mga mata niya at sa mukha niyang puno nang kasinungalingan. Napailing ako at tinulak siya palayo sa akin.