Just Me Again.

1: Twenty Months Later

"You are coming now! I don't want to listen to anything. There are only six months left! There are so many things to do. I need you here – please come back." Charlie pleaded. I chuckled and shook my head. "Don't laugh. I seriously need you here. I miss you so much. Please come back." She added lowly.

I sighed and looked out of the window. "I am so happy for you," I said to her. It wasn't a lie or a figure of speech – I am happy for her. Charlotte deserves all the happiness of life.

"Then come back and be a part of my happiness. I want to spend my last six months as a bachelorette with my best friend." She said.

Charlotte is getting married – after almost two years of relationship, Marcus proposed her, and I couldn't be happier. She will be getting married in July this year. She told me yesterday about it and I just couldn't stop crying right after I received the news. I was happy – yes a lot. I started crying out of happiness. I was truly happy for her and Marcus, but soon my failed marriage came in my mind and I just couldn't control myself. I felt selfish for thinking about my failed love at that time, but I was helpless I couldn't stop thinking about it. Leo, being the best brother helped me cope with it – he held me and gave me his shoulder to cry on.

I have to be there for her wedding – no matter what. I know it is going to be hard for me. There will be the same people, same place, same old memories – and Silas. I don't know how I am going to do it. I was fretting. For almost two years I have been trying to move on – like a coward I ran away. For two years I have been trying to forget my past, but it is impossible to run away. I changed my location, but I can't change my past. It is impossible to stop thinking about it. It is useless to run away from something that has been a vivid part of my life – it is better to deal with. It is better to face it.

"Hello, Maria?" I snapped out of my thoughts as I heard Charlie's voice through the phone-receiver.

"Yeah – I am here," I said. "Just give me a few days at least – of course, I am going there for you, Charlie," I told her.

She was quiet for a few seconds before I heard a sniff, "When will you come?" she asked. Her voice wobbled. "I feel so lonely without you. You just came to visit me once in these two years." She added.

I sighed and closed my eyes. Yes, I only went to New York once and that was last summer. I have been avoiding the memories that are attached to that city. "I will be there as soon as I can." I smiled through the tears.

After we talked for a while – Kathie was hungry so Charlie had to go. I put my cellphone on the table and looked out the window. It was mid of January and Chicago was under deep snow. I wrapped my arm around myself. I was sitting on the cozy window seat. The coldness of frozen rain behind the closed window could pass through the glass. I stare at the leafless trees blanketed with snow, "Coffee?" I heard Leo from behind me. I turned around to see him standing behind me with two mugs of hot coffee in his hands.

I smiled and took one mug from his hand, "You are an Angel in disguise." I said as I took the first sip of heavenly coffee he made.

He chuckled and sat on the chair beside me, "I know." He said.

I sighed and gazed at the steam, "Charlotte's getting married." I told him and looked at him.

He smiled and nodded, "I know – dad told me yesterday." He replied. "It's good. Marcus is a nice man." He added.

"Yes, he is," I replied. I mashed my lips together. I haven't told him that Charlotte has already told me about the kiss they shared when she was fourteen. I looked at him to see if there was even a single hint of sadness in his eyes. I wanted to see if he feel anything about her, but I was relieved when I couldn't witness anything. He took a sip from his cup and sighed while looking out of the window.