WITH GRACE.

13장

the university fair was drawing near. since exams are done already, students from both high school and college divisions happily enjoyed the week and the next to come. currently, we have two weeks before the fair takes place. most organizations are on the process of preparing for intermissions or booths to setup during the fair. with how big the university is, university fair becomes a lot more enjoyable every time.

i had more free times these days due to the preparations. because of that, i was able to makeup for my missed visits to the orphanage. it's been almost three weeks since the kids saw me. by now, they're probably upset at me.

to compensate my absence, i thought of buying the kids a present before i head to the orphanage. i stopped by i&credible to buy a box of milk chocolates, enough for each child in the younger kids' ward.

"eunhye unnie, did you get tiwed of us?"

"unnie, why didn't you visit us?"

"noona...why?"

"wun...na!!"

i was met with the kids' pitiful eyes and inquisitive mouths. i explained what happened the past few weeks i was absent, and presented my gift to them. as they happily munched on the chocolates, siho unexpectedly asked about sunghoon's whereabouts. i told them that sunghoon couldn't come today because of their training. with the fair drawing near, the dance crew needed to prepare for an explosive performance. i guessed they would perform either for the fair opening or closing.

when the day had ended, i bade the darlings farewell. a little while before that, i promised to take them to the university fair as long as they swear to be obedient to the directress and the caretakers until that time. all of them were ecstatic about it. due to the lack of manpower, the kids' are barely able to visit places and be outdoors often. they were limited to the yard within the orphanage's enclosure. in bringing them to the fair, i'm letting the kids explore and experience outdoors.

"promise you'll be good and obedient to miss lee and the others?"

"YES!" the chorus filled with innocent enthusiasm felt refreshing in my ears.

as soon as i got off the bus station nearest to my neighborhood, i decided to take the path by our apartment complex's children's park for a little change. i hummed merry tunes as i walked with lightheartedness. the sky was gradually darkening, but i made no plans to hasten my pace and be home at once.

something tells me i have to take it slow.

when the children's park was right in my view, a figure caught my attention. the figure, clad in a black shirt, sat on the swing. the swing was meant for children's use and his size difference with the intended users made him seem so adorable. i would've gladly laughed at this very moment, but then his back view was clearly on a slump.

at this instant, i just want to come close and comfort sunghoon the way he did weeks ago. it's funny how we have switched places, but i guess fate has a ploy on putting the two of us in a continual cycle. i felt happy with that, nevertheless. he has me and i have him ㅡ it's the support system i never would've imagined myself being put into.

i walked to where sunghoon sat. i had hesitated for a while at first because it seemed as though he needeed time by himself. however, i knew best that as much as people needed time alone for themselves to reflect on matters, having someone that's preferably physically present eases the tension much better. besides, that's how support systems work. we serve as a pillar of support for each other.

sunghoon hasn't been made aware of me coming closer to him. when i stood right behind his back, i noticed him flinch, perhaps feeling my presence.

i rested one hand on his back.

"it's me, sunghoon," i said as i started stroking his rear.

his back was cold, as though it has been exposed to the cold winds for long.

"why are you here, eunhye?"

"to laugh at your sorrow. of course i'm here as your support system, dummy. you're so good at treating my sadness yet you can't do it for yourself. really, we humans are so undetermined about life and choices," i maundered.

"isn't it funny, sunghoon? we keep going in circles. i comfort you, then you comfort me, and now it's me who is offering you comfort once again. i'm betting my wisdom tooth, fate is up to weird coincidences again," i continued, glancing at his still slumped silhouette.

his back shook gently. finally, i made him chuckle.

"you're really a tattletale, eunhye," he straightened his posture and turned to look at me, his eyes almost hidden in his smiles.

him smiling made me smile as well.

"i'm an authentic tattletale, mr. park," i smirked.

"really?" i was taken aback as he leaned his face dangerously close to mine.

"i-i was just k-kidding ha ha ha," i nervously laughed as i pushed him a good distance away from me.

"can you please not do that?" i softly pleaded after a little awkward silence ensued.

"do what, eunhye?"

"that ㅡ getting perniciously close to my face,"

"do i make you feel weird things, eunhye?" he interjected.

i was rendered mum at his abrupt question.

"yes..." my voice came out almost inaudible.

"what did you say?"

"n-nothing! ugh, you're back at being annoying again!"

"but i didn't even do anything!" he raised both of his arms, pleading his innocence.

"we're drifting farther from the main concern here, mister. now, can you tell me about what you feel right now? what you're thinking?"

dead air passed by us for a few seconds before he replied.

"just some family issues," his eyes became somber before he resumed his tale, "my mother badly wanted me to revert to skating. she's not so supportive about the idea of me shifting to dancing, though she hasn't completely shut me out because i followed their will to take dentistry,"

"are you happy with the choices you made in the end?"

"i don't know. i don't feel anything in particular,"

i sighed.

"sunghoon, filial piety isn't always like that. it isn't always about doing the things parents have decided for us. it's good to remain polite and obedient to them, but it doesn't necessarily mean you have to follow them strictly and thoroughly. live your life, you know. it's yours and yours to live. you only have one chance in living this life so put your happiness above everything else, alright? make your life worthwhile," i ended my speech with an assuring smile.

"how do you know what's right to say every time?"

"i can empathize well with people, except myself. it's not always the right thing, it's just what i think is appropriate to say for the situation," i said.

i fished a chocolate in my pocket and gave it to him.

"you really love consuming and giving chocolates," he said, smiling as he stared at the piece.

"i absolutely adore chocolates, but that's not entirely mine,"

"what do you mean?"

"well, i did buy the box of chocolate where that one came from. i gave it to the kids in the orphanage as present. there was an extra piece and the kids collectively agreed i give it to you as present as well. they miss you, you know?" i turned to look at him.

"i miss them too," he smiled before he consumed the piece of chocolate.

"now that you've eaten that, the kids also meant to give that to you as a bribe," i chuckled.

sunghoon threw me a curious look.

"i promised to bring them to the university fair soon. you didn't visit with me today, so the kids are bribing you with that to take them out on the fair with me,"

"i would love that," his eyes reflected the sincerity of his words as they crinkled into a beautiful one.