Leap (of faith)

21st chapter

- Right, I'll be unemployed again. I love change.

- No way! There is not one person who is not happy with your work. I can't imagine the wonders you would do if you had the whole class department for yourself.

- Thank you, but not so fast. Until that happens, though, I'll still be on a lookout for another job.

- I understand, yes, but I really believe they will keep you. Oh, I forgot to ask you, did Davor's mom call you?

- Snježana? I saw a missed call and completely forgot about it, it was probably her. I'm going to go call her to see what it was about.

Davor was a boy with severe ADHD, but this was not talked about, and Nora was certainly not the person that should make that diagnosis. Besides disrupting the class, he could not concentrate on assignments, he was loud and would interrupt every time somebody else would talk. He had been considered a misbehaved child since preschool, he was always told to calm down or was grounded. There was no worse torture for him than standing in a corner during some game or activity that he did not participate in. He would stand there screaming and crying, so while he was grounded, nobody could really get anything done. Nora knew precisely what the possible consequences of such methods could be, and she was sad that Davor was not one of the children coming to her all-day program. His mom, Snježana, heard about Nora from another mom and wanted to see if Nora could possibly work with Davor out of class. Nora agreed because that was exactly what she wanted to do in her life, and some extra money certainly would not hurt. Her week was now completely booked, but Nora was happy to have the privilege of doing what she loved. At home, she further looked into ADHD as a behavioral disorder and recognized a lot of symptoms Davor had, at least according to her colleagues. He had to keep moving, but if he was supposed to sit still, he had to at least do something with his hands. He had impulsive and unpredictable reactions, and would often get into trouble. He was moody, and all of that was a part of a reason why he did not have a lot of friends. He was lonely and was consistently blamed for something, which had a terrible effect on his confidence, even at such an early age.

The principal called Nora to his office a month before her contract was supposed to end because he wanted to tell her on time that they would not be able to keep her. The Ministry of Science and Education has granted them vocational training for the next year, and that kind of employment was much more cost-effective for them. He was sorry because he recognized how committed she was to her work and how pleased the parents were with her. The saddest thing was that she could tell he was genuine, but he had to leave it at that.

Nora anticipated a full-blown panic or chocking attack, or at least feeling pressure in her lungs. She assumed she would cry or scream, or have any kind of reaction, but she was just silent. She thanked him and walked out of his office, took her things, and left school. Disappointed and with a crushed spirit. Fully aware that she was no longer even a vocational training candidate, she could assume how the next lookout for a job would look like. How was it even possible for her to stand and walk right now, she wondered, walking around the city she genuinely grew to love. Her head was completely empty, and she felt like a madman experiencing a nervous breakdown.

She was on her way to her lesson with Davor, but she was worried about being able to do anything with him, considering her current state. She found him in his room nervously finishing some toy. His short brown hair was framing his little symmetrical face. He would always observe and examine something intensely, and Nora had a feeling that at the age of 12, this kid would probably have those little wrinkles between the eyebrows that you get when you are angry or contemplate about something all the time. He had straight teeth and a charming smile, which, unfortunately, Nora did not get to see very often. He made a toy for her so that immediately improved her mood and made her smile. Okay, Nora, you know that it's not your fault that they fired you. You have done everything humanly possible and given your all. That's what counts.