Understanding - Repkyle

eleven pt. 2

Song: Big Jet Plane
by Angus and Julia Stone
______________________________

Kyle's POV

I sneak behind the person of crystal with fast and quiet breaths down the corridor of the ship, my staff readied before me in case it turns around.

With every step I take further away from where I came in, the clearer my mind becomes and the more I regret what I did. I want to turn back, I want to agree with Ro and the others, but I also want to make sure we're prepared, and I also want to feel useful without any help from anybody else for once.

When my grip on my staff tightens, I get an old but familiar flashback.

-

My grip tightened on my staff and I try not to go numb with the cold. Snow piled up around us and the weak signal made our communicators break up slightly, but Catra's voice rang out loud and clear.

"What are you waiting for? Burn it!"

I looked to my left and frowned at Lonnie, who stared back for a split second before shrugging.

"Let's do it."

She said. I looked to my right then, to see if Rogelio was on board, but he was looking at his feet with his usual stern expression. Lonnie lit up the block of wood in her hand and raised her arm to throw it, but I grabbed her arm and yanked her back. A small piece of my hair was singed away from the flames and I could feel it's heat painting my skin. Lonnie pushed me away and shot me a glare.

"Kyle! Back off!" 

She exclaimed, flinging the block of fire into the small village before us. I could feel the contents of my stomach rising up my throat with guilt. Red and orange flames began to spring up from the thatched roofs of the tiny houses, licking the frost-bitten air and spreading from wall to wall, home to home. I was hoping that because the straw was damp with snow the flames would be put out, but I was far from right.

"Why did you do that? There are innocent people in there!"

I shouted, trying to get out of Rogelio's arms as he pushed me away. Lonnie strode ahead with a scowl on her face.

"We're soldiers. That's what we do."

-

I shake myself out of the memory by gripping my hair tight enough to feel a pinch, a small pinch that reels me back in and convinces me to keep going.

I try not to think about the past, but it's not much use when they visions force their way into my mind anyways. Every time I followed orders while I was a soldier, somebody got seriously hurt. I didn't have a say, then. If I didn't do what they told me too...

Now is different. I know that Glimmer wants us to follow the map to save Catra and Adora, but there's no way I can sleep knowing I'm this close to them without getting a head start on the obstacles we'll have to avoid. When I get out of here, they'll wonder why they never sent me in in the first place.

The strange man of glass stops walking all of a sudden and I'm shocked back into paying attention, halting immediately and praying that it can't hear me breathing. I want to run, but if I do it'll definitely see me.

It starts to turn slowly, not slow enough for me to make a run for it, but not quick enough for it to see me yet. I stand and hold my breath. Crap. I should have just waited until-

Suddenly I'm thrown around the corner out of it's view and slammed to the ground, before sliding across the floor with something on top of me. No, not something.