Soccer, Secrets, and Love

Doesnt that burn?

ASHLEY POV

USA had their game against Thailand last week and they won 13-0 which I find impressive. Sure they're getting criticized but so what if a guys team would've done it it would've been fine. They have their last training session tomorrow before their game against Chile and I heard Mal and Julie will be getting to start which is really exciting for me. Nothing major has happened with Jansen he's been kind of silent the last couple days so I'm sure something big will happen soon.

I just got back to my room after having a talk with Torres and Brown about how we're going to attack things the rest of the week. They know I'm going to be a little off my game this week since tomorrow is the anniversary if that's what you wanna call it of my partner dying. It hit me pretty hard when it happened and I'm still not over it. It's around 11:30 pm and certainly passed the teams curfew, Julie went to bed about an hour and a half ago so I might as well go to bed too. As soon as I changed clothes and my head hit the pillow I was out cold.

Flashback (dream)

We're surveying the building and area around it, we're 99% sure no one is here but we need to be cautious and check anyways. We separated to keep watch but we can still see each other and are communicating through the ear piece. It's a rather cold night in Germany but we've been in far worse conditions. This is just a simple drug ring bust, I know it doesn't sound simple but for us it is. They have this huge warehouse that we combed earlier in the day for hiding spots where we could get ambushed or any secret entry ways. We're still talking back and forth like we usually do, it helps distract from the fact anything could go wrong any second and you could die.

"Hunt when are you gonna settle down with a girl? I have no siblings you're the closest I got I want some nieces and nephews."

"Simmer down there James I don't even have a girlfriend."

"Buttttt you have that girl you've been flirting with, what's her name again? Alex or something like that right? I know you've hooked up come on there's gotta be a spark"

"Yes James you're correct but there's not much of a spark we're just testing things out, but just to humor you after this mission we'll see. On a serious note though James I'm all clear over here there's no one hiding. How is your side looking?"

"Looking good over here Hunt, this mission might be even easier than we thought it would be. Now as far as we know no one is inside so goal is get in there and wait for them to get back so we can make the bust."

"You got it James, then again you are the SENIOR agent in this situation, must feel old being 34 now having 2 kids, and having 10 years of experience"

"Yeah yeah shove it Ashley, remember stay focused and stay low just in case someone's here."

We head towards the center to meet up I'm kinda just walking aimlessly since I know my sides clear and I get lost in thought for a second about my parents. I mean someone at FBI or CIA has to know the truth about what happened to my parents. I came to terms with what happened a while back, I know they died doing what they love but it doesn't make it hurt any less. Then I start thinking about the girl I mean maybe James is right, maybe I should give a chance. All of a sudden I'm snapped out of my thoughts when I hear a click kinda like a bomb engage maybe a pressure plate.

"WAIT JAMES STOP DONT MOVE"

It was too late he moved and it exploded. I watched as he flew up into the air and landed on the ground lifeless. I run up to him and notice there's no chance of saving him.

End of flashback

I quickly shoot up in my bed covered in my own sweat and I can feel my tear stained cheeks. I still blame myself for being distracted, if I weren't distracted James would still be here today. Don't get me wrong Torres is a fantastic partner maybe even as good as James was but I just miss James I feel awful. His wife and kids told me not to blame myself, they forgave me and invite me to family events sometimes seeing as I don't have my own family. James family was like a family to me, when I wasn't with Mal and her family I was with James and his. The whole incident caused me to become an even more closed off person. It made me realize I didn't want to risk falling in love if something like that could happen to me. I didn't want my loved ones to go through what his family had to go through, in my head it was bad enough that Mal would have to go through that. I also didn't want to get distracted thinking about my significant other on a mission again. However Julie came along and changed my perspective although I do still have some concerns about hurting her or my partner.

I know I can't wake up Mal to talk right now because she needs rest and I'd feel bad waking Torres or Jenni so I decide to just go for a run to clear my head, they'll all be mad at me if they find out I didn't wake them. However it's 3 am so no one should be on the streets for me to worry about I still tuck my badge into my joggers pants pocket along with my wallet better safe than sorry. I know this area of France pretty well so I'll run a mile to the park and sit on the bench thinking for a little bit, I know it was the spot my parents got engaged it means a lot to me.

When I get to the park I see someone sitting on the bench and from behind I swear it looks like Lindsey but I'd be shocked if she's out past curfew. I slowly approach and as I get closer I can tell for sure it's her, I faintly hear crying which confuses me. I walk in front of her, just when I'm about to say something to her I see her reach for something and next thing I know I'm getting pepper sprayed which is fair I would've been alarmed at this time of night too.

I've been sprayed with this stuff multiple times over the years and I know how to maintain my cool in this situation. "Alright Lindsey that was fair I could've been a stalker."

"Oh my god Ashley I'm so sorry I didn't mean to spray you. Doesn't that burn?" As Lindsey is frantically apologize I take my water and pour it all over my face. "It's ok Lindsey really don't worry about it." I can't help but wonder why Lindsey is up so late when they have training in like 5 hours.

"So Ashley why are you out here so late? Also why are you on a run? Oh and how the hell are you calm about pepper spray?"

"Well Lindsey I could ask you the same thing. Why are you out here so late? I had an awful dream needed to clear my head, and I've been sprayed a lot I'm trained in this shit remember?"

Lindsey face palmed making me think with everything going on she forgot I'm an FBI agent she then rubs her temples before speaking again. "I walked in on Mal hooking up with Jenni earlier and it's been consuming my thoughts."

"But Lindsey I do believe when Mal kissed you that you went running out of our apartment and haven't talked to her since so care to explain?"

Lindsey lets out a loud sigh before crying again. I sit down next to her and wrap her up in a hug.

"I love her Ash, I was just scared to admit it."

"Yeah I know you do, I'm trained to read people remember. I won't tell her anything but maybe try talking to her about it, it doesn't have to be sometime soon but I'd do it before the World Cup ends. Then again France is kinda the country of love, just keep it in mind plus I'm always here to talk."

We sit in silence for about 10 more minutes before heading back to the hotel. I let Lindsey stay in the extra bed in my room for the night seeing as she needed some company and while Mal is my best friend I can't help but feel bad for Lindsey. Lindsey fell asleep about a half hour later but I'm already up for the day, I use this time to pull out my laptop and do some digging on the attack that killed my parents.