Autumn Leaves and Teenage Dreams

20. The First Step

I tend to hate February when the month rolls around. This year is no exception. The girls at St. Joseph's, already deprived of men, feel even more single when Valentine's Day approaches. Of course, girls like Allison merely just share their plans so their friends can vicariously live through them. And those friends mourn and complain that they're going to die alone. I know because I have listened to the same conversation every February. A year ago, I might have said the same things. But not this year.

"Allison, set me up with someone for a day, just so I can get some chocolate on Valentine's Day," Hazel begs, grasping onto Allison's shoulders.

"I don't think it works that way," Allison admits.

"But Valentine's Day is this Friday, and it'll be my seventeenth year without a valentine!"

"I don't think you'd be getting valentines when you were one," Abigail counters.

"Still!" Hazel complains.

I merely roll my eyes, snicker a bit, and finish my lunch, glad that Valentine's Day will be over this coming Friday. Even my younger sister, who's only thirteen, has been talking all week about which boy she thinks will ask her to be her valentine. I tried to tell her that in high school, it'd be a bit more difficult since no boys attend, to which Olivia decided she wanted to go to public school instead, and thus a fight ensued between her and my mother.

Such naïve youth, I think as I put my things away in my locker at the end of the day. So easily swayed by men and the concept of love.

"Hey, Callie!"

I almost shriek. How long as Aurora been standing next to my locker? I brush it off that I was just zoned out when she arrived, and we begin our walk home. Not much has happened this past month since school resumed. We still walk home often and study, but we don't have much free time to do anything fun like we did over break. Earlier this semester, I was head over heels, thinking something may happen, but it feels like now, we're still just friends.

"Are all your friends obsessed with Valentine's Day?" I ask.

"Every one of them," Aurora agrees, giggling as she says so.

"Ugh, mine too. They're getting on my nerves. I can't wait for the holiday to end," I say, kicking a spare pebble on the sidewalk as I talk.

"Do you have any plans that day?" Aurora asks.

I laugh. "Me? No. Not in a million years." I freeze. Perhaps Aurora does enjoy this holiday, and I've been poking fun of it the last ten minutes. And what if...Oh no. What if she does have a date for this Friday? 

"Uh, what are your plans?" I ask.

"Nothing either," Aurora says, to which I let out a sigh of relief. I expect our conversation to turn to something else, but then, Aurora speaks up. "Hey, if neither of us are doing anything, then why don't we hang out that evening?"

"Seriously?" I ask.

"I mean, unless you don't want to. But I just figured..."

"No, no, I mean I'd love to go! It's like...ironic, right?"

"Right. Ironic," Aurora agrees.

I immediately begin to beat myself up over that comment. Because suddenly, there's that slight bit of hope inside me that makes me wonder if maybe...maybe Aurora likes me.

"Then, it's a date," I say.

"It's a date," she agrees happily.

Friday can't come quick enough, but eventually, the bell rings on Friday afternoon, and I rush out of my last class, ready to head home so I can look semi-decent for my date with Aurora that evening. I keep reminding myself not to call it a date. It's merely a get-together, that's all, but thinking it's a date makes me inexplicably happy. Sometimes I think it's better for me to pretend, just to save my self-esteem.