Flawed :||: Kyle Brofloski x Reader :||: South Park Fanfiction

Chapter Four

"Oh god... you're blackmailing him for his weird dirty porn fetishes?" Stan questioned him.

"Nah. You can tell his wife's a bitch. He's a decent enough man to wipe away his porn history... at least..." Kenny shrugged.

"He probably watches the mundane shit anyway." Cartman chuckled.

"What we did find... was kind of weird..." He opened the file and showed them a printing of a newspaper clipping from almost fifteen years ago. It had a picture of a distressed baby with wires connected to her head and chest, and a tube going down her throat. The headline was:

Genetic Engineering Gone Wrong

"What the fuck?!" Kyle blinked at it with wonder, "Who is that?"

"Dude... we think it's the new girl." Cartman said.

"What?!" Stan and Kyle both exclaimed.

"Here, listen to this..." Kenny said before reading, "The babies of the future; A young, rich couple from New York City are the first, and last, to allow government experiments on their own newborn child. The perfect baby girl is what they wanted. But the perfect baby girl is not what they received.

With pulsing electric currents sent straight to specific parts of her brain to change the way it functions, they expected a genetically-engineered genius that would grow to possibly be the first female president, or something of the sort. After four months of experimenting, and nearly losing their child to electrocution because of the scientific abuse, Mr. Andrew Huckabee finally decided to shut the operation down, despite his wife's dissent. The experience showed no fatal injuries to the child. Only mild cases of brain damage that doctors said would show no educational obstacles in later life."

"So... you're saying... the new girl is retarded?" Cartman concluded.

"No, asshole. The new girl is some sort of lab rat or something." Kenny told him.

"Well... why would you need this?!" Kyle questioned him.

"It is for blackmail. From the looks of it, I don't think Mr. Huckabee, or the government, ever allowed this headline to be published. We couldn't find any other copies of it online, or any other information on it. I don't even know what newspaper company decided to write about it." Kenny shrugged.

"Dude... that's kind of fucked up... The new girl's parents just... let them do tests like that on her? On their baby?" Stan said.

"Yeah, it's weird shit, man... I don't think I'll need to use it right now... but if anything goes to shit when it comes to this little robbery we pulled tonight, I know for sure I have a scapegoat." Kenny said, shoving the file back into his coat.

"Oh god... okay, well, we should get out of here before anything else happens." Kyle insisted.

"Yeah, good call. I have what I need. Let's go." Kenny said, turning down the street. They started walking, but Stan gasped after a few minutes.

"Uh... Kyle... where are your shoes?" He whispered to him.

"My wha-" Kyle looked down at his socks, and he realized his huge mistake. He was so on edge, he barely remembered taking them off.

"Oh no..." He said.

"What?" Kenny looked back and stared at his feet, "Kyle... please tell me your joking..."

"You left them inside?!" Cartman exclaimed.

"I-I thought we all did!!" Kyle cried.

"No you idiot!! We put our shoes in our fucking backpacks!!" Kenny yelled at him.