The Alpha's Heart

chapter 10

She's really sweet for a stranger.

Maybe, I've found my home here.

Noah POV

My wolf cusses me out internally as my mother straps on a new set of chains to bind me to my bed.

She looked a lot better. Her bruises had faded and nearly all her cuts had healed.

I don't think she knows how bad she was a couple of days ago.

My mood darkens.

I need to know what happened to her. So I know who to go after.

"I'm glad to see you so passionate." My mother comments as she tugs the chains in place for a 5th time in 2 days. I shake my head.

"It's only natural," I respond. She laughs.

"You didn't even deny it. My poor boy, she's got you smitten." She touches the tip of my nose. I try to cringe back, but the chains stop me.

"Just look out for her," I ask as she makes her way out the room.

"I'm already on it." She salutes and shuts the door behind her. I sigh.

I've realized chained to this bed for days, that it's not Eliana I'm confused what to do about. It's me.

I know I'll want to be by her side constantly, but that's not something I can just do. I have responsibilities to my pack and to myself that I have promised to hold above everything. Even a mate.

Simply seeing her was like scratching a massive itch that I've been ignoring.

Are these romantic feelings?

I've always found the mate bond kind of ridiculous. Two wolves just meeting each other and yet they claim to be deeply in love with each other due to an instinctive attraction?

Bullshit.

I don't know what love is supposed to feel like but it can't be something so spontaneous.

Eliana's touch comes to mind.

I do want to see her, hold her and make her mine, but I've only met her twice now. We haven't even had a real conversation about ourselves.

All those wolves who claim to be in love instantly, only probably felt lust and the need to completely know and dominate their mate's life. Like I do now.

I want to be the one she thinks of before she sleeps, while she dreams and as she awakes.

I want to be the center figure of her life and make her mine. But I know I have other things to think about. I don't want to let anyone down.

Not again.

My wolf urges me to get up and go after Eliana as I try to stuff him lower into my mind.

I want her to develop on her own and become a great Luna as well.

All these desires are pulling me in too many directions and I know I can't go in all of them.

I can't just ignore Eliana and focus on my pack. I'd lose my mind.

I have to establish a distance we can get used to and is healthy enough for me and her to be okay with, along with our wolves.

Seeing her sitting on the nurse bed, staring at me doe-eyed makes me know it's going to be hard to just push her to the background of my life so I won't do the impossible.

But the things I cared about before her still exist and they matter just as much as she does.

I shake my head.

I can't get so overwhelmed because of this.

My father has mom and he did the best he could every day for her and the pack, when he was Alpha.

It's possible I know it is.

I'm just worried I already care way too much about Eliana.

I want her in my bed, next to me, kissing down my throat as I explore her body with my hands, her skin and lips pressed on mine.

My wolf growls.

I scoff. I guess I'm not any better than he is.

This is going to be an interesting week, to say the least.

And as much as it complicates things, I've never felt as much satisfaction as now, with her here away from her torturous pack.

This can be her home now. I can be her home.
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1,677 ~ 5/2/20

Thanks for all the support! Sorry if you see me reupload chapters, it's for readers in diff time zones and stuff. I love that you guys want an update tho! It makes my heart warm.

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Next update is on the 4th!

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