Because of that Night (Book 2)

Chapter 41: Lila

Edie squeezed tightly as she hugged Lila goodbye. She had always read more into her mother's hugs than she should have, believing that somehow, they held the answer to all of the questions she had never really gotten straight answers to. Why did they move around so much when Lila was growing up? Why did it not work out between Lila's mother and father? Why did it take for Lila to be going into high school for her mother to be opened to coming back to Borne where there was family? Why, when Lila had made the same choice her mother did to have a child at a young age did Edie up and leave? What made Lila's situation so different that she couldn't even stay?

Lila wanted so badly for none of it to matter anymore. Her mother was barely a footnote in her life, yet whenever she made herself available again, Lila was desperate for more answers. But her mother was about solving issues, she had never been about acknowledging why they existed in the first place.

"Take care of yourself, Baby," Edie whispered into Lila's ear the night she left, holding her close. "I hope that someday, you'll trust me enough to explain this all to me."

In that moment, Lila almost took her mother up on this request. She wanted to tell her everything, let loose all of the secrets she had held onto for years now in an aggressive, heaping flood. It would make her feel better to tell someone, but Lila knew that it wasn't just about telling someone, it was about telling the right someone. Her mother had proven she couldn't be trusted, and worse, she had proven she would never understand or support Lila in the way she needed her to. Because these secrets she held weren't just about her, they were about everyone, and they were about bringing peace to a situation that had not seen peace for more than just the five years since Michael had died.

Dylan was difficult to bed that night, what with the new toy and the anticipation of seeing Hunter again soon, you would think tomorrow was Christmas morning. Lila read three stories to him before his eyes finally grew heavier, and he was whisked off to dreamworld. But Lila could understand his insatiable energy that evening. She was wired too, her emotions going from anger, to sadness, pain to guilt, and back again.

She found Aunt Nova still up once she came out of Dylan's room again. She was sitting on the couch in the living room, a late-night TV host on the television, but she had the volume down low, nearly muted. She held a glass of wine in her hand, swirling the liquid around the glass, looking at nothing in particular. She stirred at the sound of the floor creaking below Lila, and Aunt Nova looked over to her.

"I opened a bottle of wine, it's in the fridge," she informed Lila.

Lila still stood in the living room entryway; her arms folded over her chest. She glanced at the clock and saw that it was nearly nine o'clock by that time.

"I have to get Dylan up and ready to go tomorrow, I really" –

Aunt Nova shook her head though, gesturing into the kitchen once again before turning her body back to the television. Lila obliged. Her aunt had never been strict, but she was definitely commanding. If she wanted you to do something, you could argue, sure, but at the end of that argument, whatever it was that she wanted from you, you were going to do it.

After pouring herself a glass, Lila joined her aunt on the couch and they both watched silently the late-night host doing his opening monologue. They couldn't hear a word he was saying, but Lila didn't care. The silence felt nice after the occurrences of that evening. It had left her feeling exhausted, and from the look on Aunt Nova's face, the feeling was mutual.

"I never had children," Aunt Nova's voice cut through the silence. Lila glanced over at her aunt, but she had not moved her gaze from the television, holding her head up with her hand. "Our parents were always so busy growing up, just trying to make it by that Edie felt like my daughter more than she did my sister sometimes."