Turned Table of the Phoenix

What I Never Knew

"Princess, the empress wishes to speak with you, I'd ask that you have some compassion"?

I looked at the slender maid, tilting my head slightly in her direction as I gave a look of disapproval.

"Take me to her and say nothing more".

Surprisingly, the emperor had not withheld his anger from the queen.

She sat there, on a stone bench, fiddling with the ring presented from the emperor. Her hair was far from being neatly tied back, strands brushed her cheek and neck. Her face was rather plain without any makeup, but she still had a natural beauty even with deep saddened eyes.

The empress looked up, she didn't bow or smile, she simply gazed.

"I need you to do a favor for me, I need you to go to my room and under my bed in the very back corner you will find a journal. Please bring it back for me".

"Did you only ask me here to do a job of a servant"?

The empress shook her head and then it was as if I wasn't there, she looked away.

I huffed and took off to the chamber of the empress. I lied on the floor, stretching my arms under the bed to find the journal.

"Well you know I find it more charming when you're on the bed rather than under it".

"Oh shut up Katsuro".

I could hear his snickering from the doorway as he walked into the room.

"Looking for something"?

"Yes just a journal the empress wanted me to find for her".

I heard a loud smack and nearly hit my head under the beds frame.

"Here I found this for you, after you never returned last night I did a little searching for fun".

I opened the journal and read a few paragraphs.

"Katsuro, this isn't right. It says here...".

Katsuro cut me off, saying as he laughed, "Oh I know exactly what she wrote. However, I think she is just setting you up to get under your skin".

Perhaps he was right, or maybe he was wrong. Would I want to risk the chance of him being wrong?

I took off down the hall without another word, Katsuro tried to catch up but still lagged a few paces behind me. I held the journal tightly in my hand, clutching its cover so hard, my hands turned a pale white. I had to try and talk to her once more.
I was out of breath, hugging my chest trying to make sense of what was going on around me. The world spun, yet I felt the weight of the world rest on my shoulders.

"Wait! Wait! I need to speak with her"!

The guards paused momentarily and turned the empress facing me.

"Did you really take care of me when I was younger? Did you really treat me like your own daughter? Why do you treat me so coldly now"?

The empress was nearly in tears as she nodded weakly as she still met my eyes.

"You.... are just like your mother... you look just like her... I can not give you reasons for my latest actions".

With that, the guards carried her off and slammed the doors. The execution was going to take place.

I ran towards the doors and tried to open them, hoping I could maybe hold back the fate of the empress, but sometimes once you learn the truth, it's too late. The doors would not budge, they were locked. The fate of the empress was also sealed. If I could only turn back time or change what I had I had done.

I banged my hands against the door until my hands were a bright red then a light to dark purple. No one would hear my plea.

"For such short legs, you run remarkably fast".

I sniffled and wiped my nose with my sleeve.

"Why did she keep so many secrets from me... Things may have been..."..

"Different"?

I turned facing Katsuro, I shook my head violently as I could only mutter "no" repeatedly. He pushed me back and examined my hands that bled.

"Why would you hurt yourself trying and save that woman"?

I couldn't find the right words...

"Why would you save someone you've wanted to be rid of for so long"?

In his voice I could hear the hissing anger that grew inside of him.

I bit my bottom lip as I tried to keep from crying again.

"She raised me," I muttered.

Katsuro rested his hand on the side of my face and leaned in towards me, resting his forehead against mine.

"I can't be here for long I have to go be the servant I'm supposed to be".

I nodded and released the air that was trapped inside my lungs. He left the area I was in and I felt relieved, that now I could clearly think about... well everything.

Who do I truly love? Who is truly by my side, better yet on my side? There was going to be a wedding, however I didn't know if it would be with the prince who was mysterious yet charming or the commoner who had a hidden past, yet I could see a future with him. One who had the power to change my life, or a man who had the power to change my heart?

I watched as the executioner walked from the room. Nothing could ever be undone. I had moved my piece on the board and had made the wrong move, even though I believed I was cunning. There was no benefit to the decision I had made, only a loss that could never be replaced.