Feel Real

Thirteen

I woke up around 10AM to Mona still in my arms. She immediately shot up and said "SHIT! THEY LEFT WITHOUT ME!" "Lets get you going, babe." I say with some sadness as I hugged her tightly. She sighed while rubbing her temples, "I really don't think I can continue this tour. I'm mentally burnt out. Mental health is taking such a bad toll on me. It's probably best I depart." Mona yawned. "Whatever decision you make, I support you." I coo. She texted her band about her mental health and how she knows of another vocalist who could replace her for tour and for them to drop off her stuff. When her band dropped off her equipment and personal belongings, she broke down bawling. Kota pulled her in for a hug, "We figured as much, girly. We are not at all mad. We knew you were struggling with this. We have no hard feelings towards you. We have always wanted you to make the right decision with your wellbeing in mind. Every member of Bodysnatcher, Falsifier, and Kublai Khan support you. None of them are mad at you either." Kota assured her. "Please take excellent care of her Ryan." Myka lipped to me. I nodded. "You'll be our sister no matter what, Mona." Zach assured her as they all hugged her quickly then breaking from it. "Thank you guys so much for the opportunity. I love y'all. All of you will always be my brothers. Thank you for everything. Have a safe tour. Keep me updated. Love you bros." She sadly said to them before they left then closing the door. "Sweetheart, you did the right thing." I assured her. Ramona looked at me, smiling a small smile. I pulled her in for a hug. "Thank you Ry. I'm also super sorry you saw me cry like that. I think the mental burn out is really starting to hit." I kept her close to me and gave her kisses for a while, "No need to apologise Mona. It's okay. Lets relax today. I've nothing going on. You need to relax and rest for the next few days." I cooed into her soft hair. "Thank you, Ry." Mona says delicately while looking up at me. My god she's so adorable. Her sleepy twinkling blue eyes, her sleepy voice and smile, her shortness. I scooped her up and took her back to our room to have a wake and bake sesh. I leaned over a bit and opened the window to hear the rain and let in fresh air to help better relax Mona. I looked slightly down at her as she was snuggled up against me; dozing off. My heart is feeling a weird sensation... I'm genuinely in love. For the first time in years. I couldn't help but to smile. I had no idea my friend was engaged to her. Mona broke it off for she felt he only loved her superficially. Josh is hurt though he isn't mad. He isn't mad at me either. He realised that he was superficially in love with her after Ramona broke it off with him. I don't want Mona to think I'm pressuring her or rushing her; though I believe she can sense my feelings for her are far different than Josh's when they were together. I have followed her and her former band on Instagram for a long time although I don't use social media much so I didn't notice she was engaged to Josh. As Mona peacefully slept on my chest I gently stroked her cheek with the back of my fingers and played with her hair. "My lord you are so charismatic." I whisper softly in awe. Mona is literal sleeping beauty. Her soul is gorgeous; her heart is impeccable; her wisdom, self-awareness, prioritising her wellbeing, keeping herself together and wanting to grow in life are all so attractive. I napped with her for a little.

***

I woke up to the smell of something very sweet. Mona wasn't in bed. I stretched before getting out of bed and going to the kitchen and found her making some food. I sneaked up behind her, "Well good afternoon, precious girl. Did you nap/sleep well?" I say sleepily with joy, kissing her cheek and wrapping my arms around her delicate body. Ramona smiled brightly as she finished making waffles with boysenberry sauce. "Yes I did. And good afternoon to you too, handsome. I assume you slept well. You were out hella cold." Mona chirped, ending with a cute giggle while quick looking up at me then going back to drizzling boysenberry sauce on a plate of waffles. "Y'know last night was the best sleep I have gotten in years? I haven't cuddled with anyone since my last relationship which was nine or so years ago." I yawned before picking her up and placing her on the counter. Ramona looked at me lovingly in the eyes, stroking my cheek as she did so, "You are the first girl I have ever fallen for and fallen in love in nine years. You are so radiant; full of life. You have such a strong, passionate heart. You are gentle and loving. You are a strong-willed, take-no-shit kind of girl. I have found some of your poetry and short stories online; your intellect is astounding. You are a smart girl with a genuine heart and soul; all of which is incredibly attractive. You have been through a lot yet you have put up one hell of a fight. I'm proud of you." I whisper with passion. Ramona wrapped her arms loosely around my neck; looking at me in the eyes with a glowing smile as her cute face turned a slight pink. "You...you've read my writings? Everything you just told me is otherworldly. The true, genuine, sincere passion is definitely there; I hear it and I can see it in your precious eyes, darling." Ramona replies in awe, blushing badly. I moved her arms so they were down for me to hold onto her hands, "Your writings have helped me change and learn so much about myself. Your writings are super inspirational and relatable. The poem about rebirth after major life changes and traumas is bittersweet and dark yet very beautiful. That was the first poem I ever read by you. The fact that I had to take breaks four times as I read it made me open my eyes and I, for once, finally didn't feel so alone. I had a connection at last. The realisations and relations I made helped me change and learn a lot. Please keep writing stories, poems, and music. Thank you so much Ramona. Please don't lose your ambitiousness. You clearly know a lot and you know how to be creative with your thorough, extensive knowledge." I reply softly with passion. "Thank you so much Ry. I'm also super glad my writings have helped you. I write to help myself and others. I'm glad you have found my writings to have something to relate to and connect with. I channeled all of my traumas and hurt into my writings to help inspire others as well as myself at the same time." Ramona gleamed. The passionate feelings I have for her grew stronger this very moment. I caressed her cheek; kissing her slowly with deep, meaningful passion. My heart is racing and pounding. My heart feels connected with hers. Ramona slowly pulled back from the kiss, smiling the brightest smile I've ever seen from anyone. "Eat up, babe. I hope you like boysenberries." Ramona cooed sweetly. I felt my face turn pink when she called me "babe". "I do like boysenberries. Had no idea you knew how to make boysenberry sauce." I tell her lovingly while getting the plate she made for me. Damn she knows how to make some damn good waffles and boysenberry sauce. I have definitely found a keeper. "Damn girl this is wonderful." I say in awe. Mona blushed while smiling more, "Thank you sweetie. I tried." She kissed my cheek before reaching to get her vape and hit it. As I ate, Mona and I were discussing plans to go out to California to get her belongings. We bought plane tickets for this Thursday to go out. We'll stay for three weeks for a little vacation for us since I've not really explored California like I've always wanted due to touring. I'm excited to explore with her. I picked Mona up off the counter and carried her to our room. I laid her down before climbing on top of her and making out with her. "I want you, Ryan." She moaned as I began to bite her neck. "Not quite yet, sexy. I want you to dress up like an insanely sexy satanic goth schoolgirl." I whispered in her ear. Ramona grinned up at me, "I'll be right back, daddy." Before going into her bag and leaving the bedroom. I'm so sexually frustrated by waiting to see her. After 15 minutes she came back into the bedroom. Oh my god. Her black pigtails; black lipstick, winged liner; the very tight black button-up crop top and how she's not wearing a bra with it and how her tits were nearly about to burst out of the shirt; the skimpy, short black plaid mini schoolgirl skirt; and the fishnet thigh-highs with lace at the top; and the fucking heels adding to the hotness of it. Even in the heat of the moment she is still so absolutely stunning. She stood innocently at the foot of the bed, innocently playing with her pigtails with an innocent yet seductive look on her face. She knows exactly what she's doing. My jaw dropped. "So? Are you gonna punish me?" She seductively pouted, twirling her pigtails. Oh my god she drives me absolutely crazy in an incredible way. Even aside from sex. I got up from the bed, pulling her towards me by her pigtails for she loves getting her hair pulled. Mona grinned, "You have no idea what you're in for." I growled while I sat down on the bed and pulled her down so she was laying on my lap. She's wearing a thong too oh my god I'm dying. My heart is racing a trillion miles an hour; my mind is going batshit crazy. Obviously not in a bad way. Mona arched her back and looked back at me, grinning seductively as she did so, "Punish me." She begged. Pulling on her pigtails so she was sitting up a bit, "You're gonna get it." I growled before biting her neck then roughly pushing her down. She is a wild girl which is so hot. I grabbed her ass roughly before roughly and constantly spanking her til her ass was red; receiving moans and the occasional "Yes daddy!" When I'd ask her "You like it/You love it when daddy punishes you/Are you my dirty girl" I can feel myself get harder and harder. I'm literally aching to be deep inside her. "Suck daddy off right now for a little bit." I demanded her. She obeyed and quickly got off me so she was on her knees and on the floor, quickly pulling my boxers down. Mona spat on my dick then roughly sucking me, deep throating me every once in a while. I've never moaned from head or sex until Ramona. She knows exactly what she is doing. I face-fucked her until her lipstick was smeared and her eyeliner running down her face. I'd pull on her pigtails as I'd face-fuck her. I let her stroke me for a bit since she's a good, obedient girl. The insanely sexy innocent look she gave me while stroking me off almost brought me to the edge. She is otherworldly beautiful. I couldn't help but to admire her in a romantic way obviously while admiring her in a sexual way. I have never felt this before. I stroked her right cheek, "My god you are so fucking hot I don't even know how to explain it. You are so fucking hot all the time, babygirl." I started while I softly moaned as she stroked my dick quickly. She smiled and winked, "You are inexplicably attractive, Ryan. Inside and out." She responded innocently. "Now get up here little girl." I demanded and slapped her. She likes to get slapped. Mona teasingly shook her head, biting her bottom lip. "Well if that's the case." I growled deeply then grabbing her and pushing her roughly onto the bed. I roughly opened her legs wide open, ripping her thong so in no time I can devour her sweetness. My mouth immediately latched onto her sweet pussy; my tongue ferociously licking up and down her pussy. "Oh god! Yes daddy!" She whimpered whilst writhing and squirming. I deeply chuckled seductively, then sliding three fingers in her drenched pussy. "Oh my god! Oh baby yes! Please destroy me!" Mona shrieked/begged. I couldn't resist either. I ripped the rest of her clothes off then immediately got over her and shoved myself deep inside of her. Pleasure and euphoria drowned me. "Oh fuck yes." I moaned as I got deep inside of her. I can tell she's close to cumming. She is absolutely drenched and super tight. I started to wreck her tight pussy; with kissing and biting her neck and chest. I moaned softly against her delicate, hickey-covered porcelain neck. Mona pulled and tugged on my hair, roughly scratched down my back before wrapping her arms around my neck loosely. I'm falling so hard for her. Sex, to me and her, is a very important spiritual and bonding experience between two people. I almost feel the passion and chemistry between us gets even stronger during sex. I propped myself up on an elbow so I can caress her cheek with my free hand and gaze into her stunning eyes with our foreheads pressed together. Mona caressed my left cheek, gazing ever so passionately into my eyes. Despite me absolutely wrecking her she kept quiet to take in this very moment. I have this urge and feeling to have a child with her. I'm getting close to 30. I want to be a father; always have wanted to be a father. An involved father. I gently grabbed her hand off my left cheek to kiss the top of it. "Mona I am deeply in love with you. I feel a very deep, unique connection with you that I've not once felt. I feel like I've known you my whole entire life." I passionately say to her with somewhat of soft moaning. "I am so in love with you Ryan. This feeling isn't anything I've felt when I was with Josh. These feelings I have for you isn't like anything I felt with Josh at all. I mean everything I tell you. I too feel like I've known you my whole life." She lovingly said between getting thrusted up in to. "Cum in me. I'm so close baby." Mona whimpered. I grunted and moaned louder and louder while going harder and faster; feeling that pleasurable knot as I got closer. "I'm cumming!" I moaned loudly when I filled her up; feeling her tighten and drip all over my dick as my load filled her up and then some. After giving the last thrusts I laid on her. Both of us panting heavily. "I can't wait to explore California with you." I panted. I felt Mona start to play with my hair, "I can't wait to show you. Also, I wasn't born here in the US. And yes I am a legal citizen. Have ben since I was 4." She cooed. I propped myself up, looking at her trying to guess where she's from. Some words she says has a slight accent from either Ukrainian or another Balkan country-esque accent. "Slovakia? I asked. She made out with me for a brief moment. "I'm assuming I'm right?" I laughed as I admired her. "Yes." She laughed. I'm not gonna ask her why her family moved. "I still love you for you. I don't see you as any different." I whisper softly before gently kissing her. "Wanna smoke?" I ask her. "Maybe later, honey. I'm exhausted. If anything I just want cuddles." She laughed before yawning. "I got you babygirl." I cooed before getting off of her and laying down with pulling her into my arms. We relaxed in peace; listening to the rainfall outside. I dozed off and relaxed when something on her lower abdomen and hip caught my eye. I think they're scars. My heart and soul hurts in an empathetic way. "You saw them, didn't you?" She very sleepily asks. "I've been trying to use scar cream. It's not working. Those scars were not self-inflicted. I got hurt badly as I was already getting hurt." She yawned, sounding like she's about to pass out. I know what she's talking about. "I know baby, I know. Don't worry about the scar cream. I can understand why you might not like to see them. If this comes out wrong I'm so sorry for I've never been in this position before with someone who's experienced that, but, you're a survivor. You've come such a long way. Those scars are to be viewed as a reminder that survival and perseverance is beautiful. Strength is beautiful—not something to be ashamed of." I cooed/yawned. She hugged me tightly which I returned, "You are honestly right about that. That is a very open-minded way to think of it. Thank you so much Ry. Thank you for accepting me as a whole." Mona said as she was about to yawn. I blush whenever Mona calls me Ry. "No need to thank me girly. Go to sleep. You need it." I whisper softly and soothingly while playing with her hair. She was out in no time since I was playing with her hair. I dozed off into a deep sleep not long after she fell asleep.