Felixity (Chanlix FF, english)

-xXChapter 25Xx-

The whole day Felix was not concentrated at all. The exam, wich he was study the whole night, went bad and it's all because of Chan. He was still messing with his head. Chan's wish was on repeat. On and on. Felix saw him in the school hall with his friend. For a moment their eyes met and Felix just wanted to leave. How did things turned out like this? He should be happy about Chan looking at him. Why wasn't he happy at all? Right, because Chan crushed his heart. „Hey Felix, wait", Chan shouted at him, stopped his walking, while his friends went on. „What?", Felix said nervously. The last night was weird and he still can feel the many tears running on his face The feeling of it won't dissapear that fast. Seing Chan again really hurt. Chan wasn't like always. He looked like he wanted to dissapear as well today. There was fear in his eyes. A thing wich was not common for Chan. Felix never saw this expression in Chans beautiful brown eyes. „I am really sorry. Can we met later at this populair bar called Levanter, please? I will message you later". Chan really inivited him. Was it a date? Even if it was a date, Felix was pretty unsure, if he should see Chan. His heart was still graving for him, still want to kiss his soft lips and do a lot more things with him, but his mind was telling NO. Chan really fucked him up.

„Please Felix. I need your advice." There was still fear in his eyes. What was Chan so afraid about? „About what happened last night?" Chan shook his head. „It's something else but I really don't know what to do. Felix, I can't sleep anymore. I can't find peace." Even with all the pain in his broken heart, Felix saw still a friend in Chan. He was his friend and Chan was desperatly. The tone of his voice was obvious. This wasn't the Chan he knew. „Okay....", Felix said. „Thank you". And then he left, waving quickly at Felix, before the blonde boy didn't see him anymore. Felix was very curious of what Chan wanted to talk with him. What things were running inside his head? What things can drain somebodys sleep out? Was it about Minho? Please not.

At home his mother waited for him. Felix was very surprised about this. Usually she was always busy when Felix come home from school but today his mother was standing in front of the living room. „Can you come here, please?" Felix sighted. He didn't want to talk to his mother, he just wanted to lay down and try to distract himself, even if it won't work out in the end. The closer Felix got to his mother, the more he could see the serious look on her face. She didn't look very happy about something. Did he do something wrong? Felix couldn't think of anything. He was always kind and gently with his parents. „Yes?". His mother crossed her arms. „ I wanted to wash the dirty laundry today and you forgot to put it in front of your door and I was thinking 'Maybe he just forget' and I was opening the door to grab it and then I saw your wall. Felix, why the hell do you have so many pictures of a boy?"

Shit. He forgot to lock his door. Felix was so distracted by all the pain caused by Chan, so everything else wasn't important. He always forget the most important things. He was the stupid little Felix again. Felix wanted to dissapear more than ever. It was so embarassing and deadly. His collection was exposed now and there is no way of turning it back. His mother saw all the pictures of Chan. Even the latest ones. The one with the sleeping Chan. Felix fell in a nervous state and his throat went sore. „Uhm....h-hei s a precious friend...of mine...please don't talk..about it." His mother didn't looked like she wanted to cut off the topic, she wanted to go on and put her son in a way more uncomfortable state. „We have to talk about it. Are you in love with this boy? That's why you took a picture of him kissing while he was sleeping and drew the many hearts on the photos? The hell, Felix, what's with you? Tell me the truth. Now."

„Yes...Please don't be mad at me. He doesn't love me anyways, so don't worry, please", Felix begged. Having an argue with his mom was the last thing Felix wanted. He can't cope with it. Everything was crushing down. „It's okay, Felix. If you love him, that's fine but the wall....it looks like you have a serious crush on this boy...But.....I've read what you wrote on the wall, Felix. The many horrible post-its from other boys of your school. Those are serious things...about hurting humans.....did you harm and bully others? If so, then stop. I didn't raised you to be...so..so crazy. I am truly shocked. You were so kind and gently. What happened to you?" There was no kindness in the word of his mother. It was like she was attacking him with all the anger, wich was boiling in her and Felix didn't know how to save himself from it. His life was crushing down more now because his mother knew what Felix true personality was about. A boy wich loved another boy a bit too much. But what was wrong with the fact? Love is something good. Not bad. Why was she so angry about it?

„Nothing has happened to me, Eomma. I just love him, that's all and no. I don't bully others. It's...it's a school project. About the flaws of humanity and...I wanted to have a visual point. If I can see it in front of my eyes, I get more ideas.. and the picture with the boy...yes I love him but he was completely okay with me taking pictures of him. I showed...him everything. He is okay with it, Eomma. Really, don't worry please. Can I just go to my room, please?". „I know when you're lying, son. I raised you for so many years, did you forget it? Felix, tell me the truth. I beg you. It's not a school project." Felix escaped the nervous state and jumped in a confidence state. „If you don't believe me, then fine. You can ask Yunmin, if you don't believe your own son. But please, I need to do homework now." Felix sighed. "And I am not crazy".

Little Lixie got caught :')) Nononono, you're mot crazy at all...just in love :')) In a sick way. Btw I've started to write the other ChanlixFF and I am already too much into the plot. I've found new ideas to fuck everyone's up, especially Chan, and  I sleep very bad because of deM FeElZ. Somebody please stop me :')))  

How are you all? <3