His First July

Chapter One

I did not know what caught my attention about her. Maybe it was the smile on her face? Or the hope? Or the high level of positivity just radiating off of her.

Or maybe it's just because she's the exact opposite of me.

"Colby-"

I looked away immediately, glancing at my Mom.

"I might use recommended glasses, Mom, but that doesn't mean my eye conditions are so horrible to the extent that I can't see what's in front of me," I told her.

Her smile made her look younger. The wrinkles in her eyes made her look more. Vibrant. "You didn't answer me the first time, and you looked like you weren't in this car with me."

I exhaled, letting my head fall back at the seat head. "You know I don't want this, Mom." I let out, feeling exhausted.

Her smile went down slowly as she gave her reply. "You don't know what you want until you get it, Colby."

I groaned, letting my head turn to the school grounds again. "I've seen high school movies... Netflix has told me all I need to know; this will be drama after drama, which is the last thing I want right now."

"Have you ever experienced drama, Colby?" She asked in an honest tone.

My head turned in her direction again as I blessed her with a blank look. "Every day of my messed up life."

She chuckled. "I don't mean that kind of drama, Colby... I mean high school drama."

I took my eyes off her, staring at the not-so-lonely road ahead. "You know I haven't... Home school is actually better, fewer people and all."

"That's the point. You don't know anything because you've been homeschooled all your life."

"Then why can't I enjoy what's left of it back home? In the safe confinement of my room, where you can find fewer people."

She sighed and shook her head, reaching out to stroke my hair.

I didn't stop her. A month from now, she won't have that opportunity again.

"Your dad and I think you should get out there. You don't have friends, Colby, and you don't know what high school is like. You're 18, and this is a time you don't want to miss. It is that point in every teenager's life where they feel alive. I want you to experience that before-" She stopped herself, almost as if she was scared to say the words.

I turned my attention back to her. Her eyes had suddenly taken that dull glow they took whenever a discussion about my health came up. She took a deep breath and exhaled, forcing a smile on her face.

All I could do was stare.

My mom was the strongest woman I'd ever known; you hardly see her breakdown... She would hold herself together and then slap on a reassuring smile.

It's so amazing to watch, yet sad.

"It's okay to say it," I said out of nowhere. "The sooner you come to terms with the fact that I have a month left in this weird place you call a world, the sooner you practice how to contain yourself when the inevitable happens."

The smile wiped off her face, and I knew what came next.

Reprimanding.

"Colby-"

"Before you call me stupid," I stopped her from talking. "I didn't say that to make you sad... I'd never do that... It's just- I'd hate it if you lose yourself when I'm gone. I don't want you to stop being the person you are because of me. So... Practice makes perfect." I smiled.