I Love You But I Think I Need Him Too

Ugg

Puck pov
She's pregnant! She is fucken pregnant. Of all the things I told her, don't get pregnant was the main one. I am furious. I could kill Finn right now. I knew they would get back together but engaged? They barely moving on from each other and now they are engaged. I bet he did this on purpose just so she won't leave him. I grunt in frustration and throw whatever I can find against the wall. How am I supposed to look at them now knowing this? I grab a bag and pack some stuff. I decided to go to a hotel and process everything.

After packing I close my door and look at her door and I feel like I should say something but I can't look at him with her. I just head out and closed the door. I walk around and I can't stop thinking about it. How can I lose her just like that? I thought possibly she would give me a chance and we can be happy. I'm sure she would be an amazing mother no doubt but I just can't get over being a mother and wife with Finn. He is my brother and all but he is an awful person. He is his best when it's just me and him and I love that but whenever he is with her it's like he changes and he becomes that person that always seems to hurt her. They are great being friends but they never work out as a couple.

I find a hotel and check-in. I put my bag down and sit in the bed. Looking around at my empty room, I cover my face with my hands and just cry.

I wake up hours later and it's morning. I have a huge headache, always happens when I cry which is rare. I don't know why I broke down. Was it the fact I could never have her now? Or that fact that I wish it was me that was marring her and have our kids. Or is it because she is the love of my life and I dont want anyone but her. My mind is racing thinking about this that I suddenly break down again. "fuck what is wrong with me?" I tell myself and wipe my tears. I look at my phone and check my messages. "i am so sorry. Please forgive me. I don't plan for this, it just happens. I am so so sorry." she sends me and I break down again. I put my phone down and get angry for being a pansy. "come on puckerman you ain't a bitch. Stop crying and suck it up. Man up." I say to my reflection in the mirror. I sigh heavily and get dressed.

I look around and I feel so alone. I want to go home. I sigh and check my phone again. I think about replying to her but I don't know what to say. I grab my bag and check out. I get a flower and head home. I open the door and it's empty but I can hear a faint sound. I go too slowly to the sound and it's in my room. I see Rachel talking to herself wearing my old football jacket.

"what are you doing?" I ask scaring her. She gets up and comes to me. "i am so sorry for all this. I didn't plan this. It just happened. Please please don't hate me." she gets teary eye. I don't say anything but put my bag down and walk to my bed. She sighs. "that's your life. If you wanna screw it up that's on you." I bluntly say and walk away leaving. As I walk down the street I think about what I'm feeling and it's mixed emotions.

I stop and think about what I said and start regretting it. Maybe I was too harsh, maybe it's not her fault but Finn's. I stop at a random place and sit to think.

A few hours later I get a call from Finn. I scoff and let it ring. He calls again and I deny it. He calls again and I get annoyed, "WHAT?" I yelled out in anger. "hey I know you hate me. Right now but have you seen Rachel? I have been calling her and she not home. I'm worried, " he says and I know he is by his voice. "ill is right there." I say and hang up. I make my way home.

Walking in I see Finn pacing back in forth. "please tell me you seen her!" he says looking at me with sadness. "no I haven't. I did come early and she was here but I left right after." he sighs and his phone rings. He quickly answers it. "yes this is he. What? Is she okay? Yes thank you." he hangs up and he starts hyperventing and runs to go get his jacket. "what happens? Finn, what happens?" I ask and stop him. "she in the hospital she was in an accident. I got to go I got to be there." he walks out and I follow.