⚠️-Chapter Nine-⚠️

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(A/N; Hey everyone, I just wanted to say that this chapter will include mentions of panic attacks, and heavy anxiety)

Twelve days have passed and nothing much happened recently. Today was Halloween and school was cancelled. So, naturally Shuichi and I were hanging out since we woke up. We had both had nothing to wear as a costume, so we decided to head out to town to get something to wear. It was 8:15 in the morning when we left. Together we walked the hour long journey and it was virtually silent the whole walk. We just simply enjoyed each other's company. Once we reached the main town square, we saw countless of shops that were completely decked out in decorations. Although some would find it tacky, Saihara and I were in wonderland. I was dragged into the first shop that sold costumes, and was immediately thrown into a search. After countless searching for what was only 45 minutes, we found them, the perfect costumes. We absolutely could believe our luck when we stumbled upon costumes of Sherlock Holmes and Watson. This was all too fitting with my Saihara-Chan being the ultimate detective after all. Fortunately for us, they were on sale because who buys costumes on Halloween. So, we grabbed the costumes and walked towards the counter. "Kokichi, can we take the bus home? I'll pay for it, I just really don't wanna have to walk home again." Shuichi spoke up.

"Of course Saihara-Chan, as long as you hold my hand. You know I get nervous when we ride the bus" I joked towards him. He laughed back and placed the costumes on the counter. Once the cashier said the price, I swiped my card before Shuichi could even try to pay. After the cashier handed us our bag and we walked outside, Shu started to playfully hit me and whine about how he should've been able to pay. "This was for paying for dinner that one night, it's only fair." was all I said in return. He frowned, but still carried on walking us to the closest bus stop. We quickly read the schedule and realized that it would be here in 1 minute. So, Shuichi pulled out his wallet and readied himself to pay for the both of us. Soon enough, the bus arrived and we hopped on board. Shu quickly put in both of our fares and led us to 2 empty seats. The anxiety set in almost immediately as we sat down. Suddenly, I felt a strong grip on my hand and I looked down to see none other than Shuichi holding my hand like he promised. I felt my troubles getting lifted from my very shoulders. This made the ride feel like nothing and time passed so slowly in the moments. After the 30 minute ride, we arrived right outside of campus and walked back to Shuichi's dorm. The whole walk back he still held on tightly to my hand. However once we got inside of his dorm, he let go. I was upset, but I brushed it off.


"Hey Ouma, let's get into our costumes!" Shuichi cheered as he began to pull the costumes out of their packaging. It was a little early for that considering it was only 10:30, but I complied and damn did we look adorable. Seeing Saihara dressed as Sherlock took my breath away, he was still perfect in every way in my eyes. I couldn't help, but just marvel at his beauty. "Ummmm, You okay Kokichi? You haven't stopped staring at me since I've gotten changed. Do I really look that bad?" He asked sounding a bit worried.

My face turned bright red as I spoke up; "No, no, no! Not at all my Saihara-Chan. You look stunning, that's why I keep looking at you". He smiled back with a glowing look on his face that made my heart sing. We eventually started to dance around and take lots of pictures to remember the day. We had been dancing for hours at this point and only stopped to eat a super late lunch when suddenly, I received a text from none other than my good pal Rantaro Amami. It was an invite for me and Shuichi to go to his Halloween party at his parents house. Here's the thing about that; I'm anxious at social events, Rantaro knows lots of people, and he has good money, so this party could be wild. Regardless of my mental health, I wanted to go, so I decided to speak up to Saihara. "Hey Shu-Shu, Rantaro just invited us to his Halloween party. We should goooo!!" I screamed

"Umm, Ouma, as fun as it sounds, we really shouldn't go. You know you're way too anxious for a party like that. I don't think it would be best." Shuichi responded leading the conversation to a serious turn.

"I could handle it, and besides, I think I would know what's best for me and I think this party would be a blast. So we're going" I announced.

He began to sound a bit angry and defensive; "You and I both know that you couldn't handle it, and who are you to say if I'm going or not. If you wanna go fine, but I'm staying here, you're welcome to stay here as well if you decide to come to your senses."

At the rate, I started to get heated; "Shuichi, I can handle it, I'm not a scared little boy. And you really aren't gonna go? you're not even gonna go to show off our costumes? Some friend you are" I immediately regret that last sentence once I said it.

"Oh? I'm a bad friend now huh? Okay Kokichi, you know what? I will go to that party alone. And you can go to that party alone too. Then you can show me how you can really handle this party. Since I'm such a bad friend too, you might as well just leave my dorm too. Have fun at the party Mr. Supreme Leader." He spat back at me.

"Fine I will!" I yelled back at him as I collected my stuff and headed towards the door. I walked out and he slammed the door behind me. Once I hit the outdoors, I began to tear up as I walked towards my own dorm. I kept replaying the whole ordeal in my head and got sadder and sadder. But then I realized that I could turn this night around. It was now 4:39 and the party was just about to begin. I decided to head straight there instead of going to my dorm at all. I marched my way off campus and two blocks away until I got to the house. You could really tell it was the party by all the cars around the house and the loud ass music. I swallowed my pride as I walked into the party alone. Once I hit the inside, the smell of alcohol hit me like a train and I felt my stomach churn. Soon I was greeted by a very relaxed Rantaro, "Ouma! It's so nice to have you here little bro! Drinks are in the kitchen and the party is all over, so just jump right in!" He yelled over the music. Immediately after he said that, he was dragged away into the crowd. At this rate, I had no clue what to do, so I headed into the kitchen and helped myself to an alcoholic drink. I had never touched anything like this before, so I was quite nervous, but I figured it would take of the anxious feeling of being on my own. I casually picked up a beer bottle and cracked it open.

The beer was awful, not my taste at all, but I still insisted on drinking it. I aimlessly wandered around as I continued to drink the disgusting liquid some more. After nursing my drink and sitting alone in the hallway for 3 hours, my drink was all finished, so I went to grab another, when I saw Shuichi standing in the kitchen. He watched me grab the drink and rolled his eyes resuming his conversation with Kaito. This time I cracked open the bottle and chugged it all. I put the empty bottle down and found myself in the middle of a huge crowd in the living room. I felt sick to my stomach, the beers did nothing, but make me feel sicker and on edge. I was super paranoid and I began to panic. The world around me started to blur together. Everyone felt way to close to me, and it was getting hard to breathe. I started to hyperventilate. I couldn't manage to catch my breath and everything was way too much to take in. Tears formed in my eyes and I felt like was going to vomit. I tried to move, but I was frozen in place. My legs gave out from underneath me and I held my knees close to my chest as I struggled to breathe. This panic attack was unbearable and I couldn't manage to grip my surroundings. I wanted to scream, but I had no control anymore. Here I was in the middle of the crowd, but no one saw me struggling over the loud music. The world around me was fading to black and I.......

    ?????'s POV

   The heat of the party was just beginning and a good song actually started to play. I began to head for the dance floor when I saw him. He was on the ground in the middle of the crowd, and his knees were in his chest. He was clearly having a panic attack in the middle of the crowd and no one did anything. I ran into the crowd and made my way to him. That's when I realized he had lost consciousness. I reached out and picked him up. I carried him up the stairs and to the quietest room that I could find. Now that I was with him, he would never leave my sight.

Don't worry Ouma, you'll be okay, you're safe with me now.

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