Tainted Love | ✓

Chapter Sixteen

life becomes easier

when you learn to accept the apology

you never got

.・゜-: ✧ :-　　-: ✧ :-゜・．

I COULDN'T SEEM TO BREATHE.

Air didn't seem to be able to enter my lungs. My chest burned, with such a fire, it felt like someone was repeatedly stabbing me. Everything around me shifted and blurred. I staggered backwards on my feet, while my hand shot out in an attempt to steady myself, but I missed and stumbled over my feet.

Toby, quick to react, wrapped his arm around my shoulders, "You're okay, Omi. Come on, I got you."

He supported me upright, not letting go, even when I told him I was fine. I knew I looked a mess - my hair was disheveled from the hundreds of times I had run my fingers through it and my cheeks had mascara stains smudged everywhere. Yet, Toby didn't even seem to notice, or care, as all he gazed at me with was concern and worry.

"I can't lose her, Toby," I rasped, my voice raw from all my crying, "I just can't."

"I know," he soothed, and ran a hand up and down my back in comfort, "And you won't. Mrs Ryan is probably the strongest person I know, okay? She's going to pull through. I know she will."

"You think so?" I murmured, desperation sounding in my voice. In that moment, I was desperate to cling onto any inkling of hope that she would be okay. The muscles of my chin trembled like a small child, and I sought the comfort only a mother could provide.

My gaze drifted over to where dad was sat; a few feet away from us. Just observing the expression on his face had me wanting to burst out into tears again. His face was completely scrunched up in distress. His suit jacket was carelessly tossed on the back of the chair, and his tie was hanging loose from around his neck. Every few seconds, his hands would find their way into his hair, where he would tug on the roots with frustration and anger. Even from here, I could see and feel the immense pain that was radiating off of him.

I tore my eyes away when Toby offered me a comforting smile, honesty shining in his eyes, "Have I lied to you before?"

"Yes, actually," I sniffed and looked at him accusingly, "You have."

Toby jerked back in confusion, "What? When?"

"You once said you didn't steal my Nutella sandwich but I saw you take it."

"Seriously?" he complained, "That was like two years ago -"

"See? You do remember it," I accused, a momentary smile gracing my lips before it promptly fell. My shoulders slumped forwards as I trudged towards an empty seat. I thought my heart would explode, and my eyes were wide with fear. Despite the warmth that was in the corridor, my body felt hot and sweat started trickling down my neck. I couldn't hear my rapid breathing, but I could feel the oxygen flooding in and out of my lungs.

"Toby," I started, my voice extremely hesitant. At the sound of my voice, his head jerked in my direction, and shot me an encouraging smile.

"Hm?"

A lump formed in my throat, trying to prevent me from speaking, but I forced myself to swallow it down. Fear tortured my stomach; churning in tense cramps. I noticed my feet were trembling; shaking up and down in rhythmic beats; fighting the impulse to jump up and sprint down the corridor.

"I. . . I need to talk to you about something," I cleared my throat, averting my gaze away from his inquisitive ones.

"You know you can tell me anything, Naomi," Toby murmured in reassurance, "I told you. I'm always gong to be here for you. No matter what."