The Diary Of Iqbal Syed-A Raazi Fanfiction

A Conversation

Monday,

1st March

11:15 P.M.

We leave for India tomorrow, and the wedding is in four days, on the Fifth. Excitement and Nervousness are both at their peak now that the day is so near. Today, like he had done some two months prior, Abba called me into his study again—he's trying to sort things out as much as he can before we leave—and we had a conversation that is probably passed down through generations. I did feel a little indignant when Abba told me in no uncertain terms to treat Sehmat like the queen she is, as if I would have ever considered otherwise, but I suppose it is necessary, sometimes. I gave him my word that I would, of course I would. I've seen Abba tell this to so many of my cousins when I was little, too little to understand the implications. Looking back, some of them did need to be told this.

He peered at me then, leaning back in his chair, and sighed that sigh only parents can and wondered aloud when it was that I had grown up. He mentioned Ammi for what has to be the first time in years. He never talks about her...but today he told me that Ammi would've been proud of me. That she probably is, from where she is looking down at us. Abba's eyes were shining. I left after that. I wish I could console him but I don't really know how.

I have to admit I did allow myself a small moment of weakness when I was in the safety of my bedroom. It has been thirteen years now since Ammi's death but it hurts just the same. Maybe even worse. It won't ever stop hurting.

Iqbal. S