Boundaries

Into Your World.

When Professor Blake announced the following week that I had been chosen as one of the participants in the art show, I was more than relieved.

Mainly because of how worried I had been that I wouldn't be able to come up with something in time.

I could hear some of my fellow classmates muttering under their breath about how they figured I would be chosen or how it was too easy for me.

If only they knew.

Sure, I was good at what I did, but my inspiration came from an unpredictable source. A source who, after finally opening up to me, I would've never been able to complete my piece without.

It probably sounds bad when thinking about the fact that I used Hero for an art project, but my needs went so much deeper than that.

Things between Hero and I have changed for the better. It seems now that I've gotten to know him better, I've been able to enjoy him as a person. It was nice to see him for who he really was rather than having to hear it from everyone else.

I finally heard the truth directly from him.

However, I recently began to feel an intense amount of pressure when I see him.

Hero told me things that no one else knew, and he overcame the boundaries he created for himself to do it. He broke down in front of me and showed me a side of vulnerability that I didn't even know existed.

Was I expected to do the same in return?

Hero hasn't mentioned anything, nor has he tried to pressure me into telling him things.

It amazes me how much he's changed in the nearly three months I've known him.

How rather than having snide comebacks when things got serious, he'll have a conversation.

How he's more considerate rather than passive.

He's also been spending quite a bit more time away from his gang, which hasn't aided in the uneasiness I feel.

Sure, I asked him to leave. But I can't help but wonder if that was the right thing for me to ask of him.

He had a binding to this gang that I wasn't sure I understood. I didn't know what the repercussions would be if he left. What would happen if Seb found out about us? About me?

I try not to push the topic too hard around him, asking him here or there if he felt comfortable. I just wanted him to know that whatever he needed to do, I would be okay with.

I think I owed him that much after practically forcing an explanation out of him.

For the first time in a while, I had a day off from Delilah's.

I wasn't entirely thrilled given I was running low on income for groceries, but I couldn't argue with Phil.

He was under a lot of stress given how slow business has been lately.

I feel bad too; Delilah's is a great place.

The apartment is empty when I come back from class. I find a note from Khadijah in the kitchen telling me that she and Alex had gone to Brighton for the day and she wasn't sure when they'd be back.

It amazed me how often she was able to miss her classes, but it wasn't my place to parent her.

Especially because I'd be a hypocrite after complaining that she tried to parent me many times before.

I decide to hide away in my room, working on pieces here and there. Most of them ended up being of Hero, given that I was ahead on my assignments.

It felt nice to have a genuine muse after all this time, my pieces becoming much lighter and full of life rather than their usual dark, depressing tone.