Steve's Diary

March 2, 1939

Dear Diary,

It's that time of year again, and I couldn't be more excited!

Usually, people my age are excited for days like their birthday or Christmas or something bigger... but this? These little, annual, trips to Coney Island? That's what I look forward to all year.

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We decided to take the train from home to Coney Island this year with the hopes that everything would work out alright at the end of the day.

When we finally got there, it was about 4 o'clock in the afternoon and we really did have the whole day ahead of us to do whatever we wanted. I knew it would be a great day, just as it always was every year.

Walking through the streets with him by my side was like nothing I had ever felt before... it was a sort of pure joy that I feel like is only achievable when I'm with him. He looked down at me as I walked there alongside him, and I acted didn't notice. We had been making our way through the boardwalk, looking for something fun to do and there were so many options.

"You hungry?" He asked me, making me look up at him. To be fair, I was zoning out on the amusement park that rested by the water. The wooden coasters and tall structures seemed to be calling out for me. I wasn't even thinking about anything else at the moment.

"Uh- oh... uhm, yea. Kinda. Are you?" I replied.

"Yea... anything here you wanna eat or not really?" He came back.

I scanned the shops and stands nearby and made a face at him. I pointed at a pretzel stand. "How's that look?" I asked.

"Ooooooo yea. They have hot dogs, too. That's what I'm gonna get," he told me.

We walked over to the stand to get our food and, of course, he wouldn't let me pay for my stuff. Even when we were in public he had to find some way to tell me that I was his and he was mine.

After sitting at the little food area that was set up, we decided on the Ferris wheel to start of slow, as we had just eaten. So, we hopped on line.

There were a lot of people waiting to get on, so it took a little while to load all the carts and, somehow, me and him managed to get one all on our own. Oh, how that seemed to fuel my fantasy.

And just then, the park seemed to get smaller and smaller until every little person and ride and noise seemed to become insignificant. Like the world was washing away and we were floating off into the air. At least we were together, I thought. If it he and I to be the last two people on Earth, dear God, was I glad it was him.

It wasn't even that we were talking or doing something, because that wasn't it at all... that wasn't what was triggering these thoughts. I suppose it was that this was an annual occurrence, our trips to Luna Park at Coney Island. I guess it's been a realization process for me, today more so than ever before, in that I had usually taken this trip for granted. Sure, we did this every year, but it's just now hitting me that we may never do this again.

As I sat next to him, I took his hand in mine in the small gap between our legs. He looked over at me and smiled. "You know, we did this last time... and you know we ca-"

"I know, Buck. I know we can't do more than this," I cut him off. "But maybe this is all we need right now... this is all we've got."

He didn't say anything more. He just looked at me. Now, he knew I didn't mind this, though I wished he would say something to me... who knew how much more there would be to say? How much more time is there to potentially say anything?